


Falling

by Aurora Black (bam469)



Series: Beyond the Veil [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 11:26:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 38
Words: 124,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11462622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bam469/pseuds/Aurora%20Black
Summary: What IS beyond the veil?  Sirius reunites with his best mates, his family, and finally finds a life worth living in death.





	1. The Mist

**Author's Note:**

> I generally am thinking of an actor when I write a character (if Warner Bros hasn't already provided one for us). I've put them in parenthesis. Ignore if you wish.
> 
> Also, it may get smutty in spots. Be warned.

Falling. Should have stopped falling by now. The floor shouldn't be this far away. Darkness. Eyes are closed, you bloody idiot. That's the darkness. Sirius blinked a few times, adjusting to the light after the musty blackness of the prophecy room. Opening his stormy gray eyes brought light but nothing to look at but thick white mist. What the hell happened?

Sirius was surprised to learn that all his limbs still worked. Must have been a simple stupefy spell. Fucking Bella. The bane of his existence since their births a few days apart from each other. Of course, none of that explained where the prophecy room went. Where the Death Eaters went. Where Harry went!

Sirius jumped up quickly, instinctively reaching for his wand but was shocked to find himself naked and unarmed. Panic started to set in like fog creeping across the Highland moors on the way to Hogwarts. His eyes darted around looking for anyone, anything beyond the absolute emptiness of the...room? Was it even a room? A cell? For a brief moment, he thought he was back in Azkaban. The panic rolled in now, heartbeat quickening, terror just beyond the horizon. He spotted movement ahead of him. Someone walked, no make that ran toward him through the mist. He registered James at the same time he felt arms around him.

Sirius clung to James (played by Daniel Radcliffe) knowing that he couldn't control the emotions bubbling up inside of him, knowing he was about to start sobbing like a wounded child. Whatever abilities he had developed over the years that allowed him to push emotions down were vanquished in that moment of pure joy at seeing his best friend, his brother again. Tears rolled down his face. He could hear James crying too and hugged him tighter, dimly aware that he was naked and this could be perceived as odd and potentially an embarrassing story that James would happily tell for the next decade. He decided future humiliation was a small price to pay for having James in his arms.

James crushed Sirius to him not caring that he was naked, not caring why he was here, only that he was. He was here and James felt like a missing piece of him had just been put back into place. Thoughts, questions, 14 years of conversations that he'd had with imaginary Sirius swirled in his head like a cyclone but for once, he was speechless.

"My turn. You've had him long enough," Lily (played by Karen Gillan) insisted, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Sirius looked up to see Lily gazing at him lovingly. He let go of James and Lily ran into his arms. Still a bit strange that I'm naked, he thought, but I really don't care right now. He hugged her tightly, looking over her shoulder to see Euphemia (played by Eve Myles) and Fleamont Potter (played by John Barrowman) coming toward him as well, their arms outstretched. His family. His real family. Their love washing away 12 years of Azkaban, the last year trapped in that mausoleum that was his childhood home with all of its childhood nightmares. He pushed away the questions that had begun to seep into his brain. What's going on? Where am I? Am I d... He pushed the nagging fear away and clung to his family like a desperate, drowning man.

The vague memory of the soul rotting Grimmauld Place slowly crystallized in Sirius' consciousness. A tether to reality which this was, sadly, not. His reality didn't include James or Lily or his adopted parents. His reality included nothing but pain and loss and waking nightmares and.... "Harry! Where's Harry? " He pulled away from his family, eyes galloping around the room.

The Potters gaped at him.

"Harry?" Fleamont asked.

"Sirius, dear..." Euphemia began unsure how to proceed.

Lily looked alarmed. "Why would you ask that?"

James put his arm around Sirius and spoke gently. "Padfoot...."

Sirius' brain started to spin, furiously trying to work out what had happened. "Where's Harry? Where is Harry???? I have to find Harry!!!!" His voice sounded unhinged even to him. He vaguely heard James trying to comfort him, calm him, Padfoot something.... Padfoot died in Azkaban, James, but there was no time to explain that now. He had to get back to Harry. The Death Eaters. Voldemort could already be there. "How do I get back? Where's the door? I have to go back!"

The Potters' confusion was turning quickly to concern. "Sirius, there's no going back," James said gently. How do I tell my best friend he's dead? How do I tell him I'm glad of it? Maybe leave out the last part no matter how true.

Sirius grabbed James by the shirt. Why was James clothed? Why was he naked? Not important. "James, I have to get to Harry! He's fighting Death Eaters! Voldemort could be there any moment! I have to get back! Help me find the fucking door! Why aren't you helping me??? Help me!"

"Sirius, I can't help you! There is no fucking door!" James yelled, grabbing Sirius by the shoulders and forcing him to look him in the eyes, trying not to focus on the haunted desperation he saw there. He pushed the terrible thought that had been circling since he saw Sirius away, the thought that something horrible had happened to him, that something had gone terribly wrong. He stared into Sirius' eyes willing him to understand. "There's no going back, Pads!" He forced his voice to soften. "You're...dead, Sirius. Like us." He looked around at Lily and his parents. "There's no going back."

Sirius shook his head in violent denial despite knowing that it was true. But it can't be true. He can't have abandoned Harry like this. If he could just explain.... "But it was just a stunning curse, James. Not a killing curse. She didn't kill me. She just stunned me and then I fell through that veil but I wasn't dead," Sirius said desperate for them to understand.

"I don't know what happened, Pads, but if you're here, you can't go back," James said equally desperate for Sirius to understand him. He'd heard of what happened to people who were unable to accept their deaths. The empty half lives. He'd seen the evidence floating around Hogwarts for seven years. "You're dead, Pads. You can't go back."

"It's true, son," Fleamont said gently putting a reassuring hand on Sirius' shoulder. "There's no way back." He kept his voice calm. He glanced at James and knew that James shared his fears. Sirius must accept this and he must accept it now.

"There has to be a way!" Sirius tried to get away from James but James held on.

Euphemia shook her head sadly. "There is no way back, dear."

"But I have to go," Sirius explained his desperation increasing with each passing moment. Voldemort had arrived by now. He was sure of it. And if not today...he can't fail Harry. Not again. "I have to be there for Harry. I have to go back."

Lily gently touched Sirius' face surprised by how sallow and wrinkled he was, how haunted his eyes were. There would be time later to find out what happened to him but only if he accepted this. She stared into his haunted almost crazed eyes, willing him to understand. "We left behind our baby, Sirius. If there was a door, don't you think we would have found it by now?"

Sirius felt the fight going out of him as he realized the truth of Lily's words. They never would have left Harry if there was a way back. There is no way back. He sagged against James who was no longer holding him back but holding him up.

"I'm so sorry," James whispered, trying to keep the relief out of his voice. "But you're home now."

Sirius felt arms around him, the arms of his family and knew that it was true. He was home.


	2. Everything's Fine...Nothing to Worry About

The Potters lived in a large estate in Gloucestershire purchased by Henry Potter in the early 1920s from a noble family who had failed to transition to the modern age. Henry willed the house to his son, Fleamont,upon his death. Fleamont and his wife, Euphemia, had grand plans to fill the expansive mansion with children but they were able to have only one son, James, and even he came very late in their lives.

Sirius sat on a couch of mahogany and red leather in the well appointed sitting room. French Heritage bookcases lined the walls, oriental rugs adorned the ebony wood floors. A fire blazed in the enormous stone fireplace, a remnant of the original house built in medieval times. Wands and shield with the Potter family crest hung over the mantel in the way of the muggle nobility. Sirius had always quite liked this room but today, he could think of nothing but Harry. Harry's face as he fell through the veil. Harry screaming. Remus' face. He'd failed them all. Again.

Lily and James sat on either side of Sirius trying to think of the right thing to say. They both knew that he was wrong somehow. That something had happened, something horrific.

Sirius gazed into the fireplace. He wondered briefly if it was connected to the flue network. Of course not. They would have made contact if it were. They. James and Lily. Someone had kindly provided him with clothes that smelled like James though he only vaguely remembered it happening. He was also only vaguely aware of Lily holding his hand and James' arm around his shoulders. He could feel their unspoken concern coming off them in waves though. He'd become quite used to that since being sequestered at Grimmauld Place. Perhaps he wasn't as good at hiding the dementors, the insanity, as he thought.

The mildly awkward silence was broken at once by tea and biscuits brought by Fleamont and Euphemia and by questions brought by Lily. "Please tell us about Harry! Anything...," she pleaded with a slightly desperate tone to her normally confident voice. "It's been so long with no news. What's he look like? Does he like school? Who are his fri...."

"Lily, he just got here. Let him acclimate. It's not always easy to accept that the before world is over," Fleamont chided her softly. He sat down in a black leather wingback chair across from Sirius and smiled at the man he considered his son. "He just needs a little time."

Sirius forced his eyes to focus. To focus on Lily and her questions. Her safe questions. "No, it's okay. She should know how her son is." He thought for a moment. "He looks like James. Exactly like James actually. To the point that it's sometimes disturbing. Poor kid." He almost smiled but couldn't quite manage it. "But he has your eyes."

"Beautiful eyes," James smiled across at his wife, still madly in love with her after all these years.

Sirius did smile slightly then. With all the horrible things that had happened, one thing was still the same, still good and pure. He relaxed a bit.

"School...he loves Hogwarts but...." Sirius tried to think of how to phrase the situation. "He didn't quite get your love of studying, Evans."

"Why am I not surprised?" Lily playfully glared at James who gave her a "who me?" look.

Sirius turned to James, remembering. "He made the Gryffindor Quidditch team as a first year! He's really good. Better than you even."

James beamed with pride. "A first year? That's unheard of! What's he play? Is the team good? What's their record?" he asked excitedly.

Lily rolled her eyes.

"He's their seeker actually. They won the cup his third year. It was canceled last year for the Triwizard Tournament...." Sirius stopped as images of Harry beaten and bruised and terrified after his run in with Voldemort in the graveyard flooded his mind. He shook it off but not before Fleamont saw the shift in his face and eyed him suspiciously. "I bought him a Firebolt. You'd be amazed at the new technology, Prongs. It...."

Lily cut Sirius off. "Before this denigrates into an hour long discussion on the merits of Quidditch equipment, could we possibly get back to my son?"

James grinned.

"Fine. You asked about his friends? He has two best mates . Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. Ron's parents are Arthur Weasley and Molly Prewett. Do you remember them? They were a bit older than us. Molly's brothers were in the Order and Arthur was prefect when we were first years."

Lily and James nodded.

"Good chap, Arthur Weasley," James said. He remembered Arthur vividly in fact as the older boy who shut down the Slytherins any time Sirius got one of those horrible howlers from his mother. He wondered if Sirius remembered as well. He caught Sirius' eyes and could see that he did. "If this Ron is anything like his father, he sounds like a brilliant choice for best mate."

Sirius continued with these happy, safe questions. Grateful for them really. "Hermione is muggle born and quite brilliant." He looked at Lily. "And she likes to study like some other oddball people we know so she should keep Harry and Ron from flunking out." He grinned at Lily but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

Euphemia glanced at Fleamont who gave her an "I see it" look.

James laughed desperate not to focus on his best friend's ravaged face and haunted eyes.

Fleamont steeled himself and looked at his adopted son. He knew Sirius well enough to know that there was a mountain that he was hiding behind these little molehills of studies and Quidditch and best mates. Sirius had never been one to burden you with his problems without a great deal of prodding. Fleamont flashed to a rainy night 20 years ago when he and James had found a bleeding and broken boy on their front porch. The night that he gained a second son. He forced the bittersweet memory from his head to focus on the matter at hand. "You mentioned Death Eaters."

James stopped laughing. Sober now.

Sirius sobered as well. Of course, they're going to ask about this. He sighed. "War is coming again. If it ever ended. Voldemort's back...he was gone for a long time after...but he's back, he's recalled the Death Eaters, the Ministry is burying its head in the sand, and Harry...." He spoke quietly, almost too softly to hear. "I left him unprotected, James. I'm so sorry. I failed you."

"You died, Pads. Can't be helped." James rubbed Sirius' back, trying to comfort. Could it be something as simple as the war and worrying about Harry? Maybe he'd look like hell too if he was raising a teenager.

"I should have stayed in the house but I couldn't. He was in danger and I couldn't do nothing. Not anymore." Grief and anger mixed in Sirius' voice, on his face. He knew he wasn't making any sense. Didn't want to make sense about THIS. Didn't want them to know about that house. How bad it got. How bad HE got. He felt the deep depression on the fringes of his consciousness kept at bay for the moment by the proximity of his family but for how long? He took a deep breath and composed himself. He saw the look of concern on Lily's face and thought that it was for Harry. He quickly added, "Harry's not facing the Death Eaters alone. The Order is there. Remus. They won't fail him," he muttered with the slightest edge of bitterness.

"Why is a 15 year old fighting Death Eaters?" Lily asked.

"What's going on, Sirius? What house were you supposed to stay in?" The concern on James' face mirrored the concern on everyone's faces.

Sirius shook his head. "Nothing. It's not important." He forced a smile and turned to James. "Do you want to hear about his first kiss?"

James knew Sirius was changing the subject, knew there was something very, very wrong with him but let him do it. For now. "Of course!"


	3. Nothing's Fine

************************************************************************************************************  
While the house boasted of a formal dining room fit to receive royalty, the Potters preferred to eat their meals in the kitchen near the back of the house. It was a cozy little room with a roaring fire, the counters littered with magical implements and the occasional muggle appliance. Tonight, a toaster lay in pieces near the sink. Dinner clean up was nearing completion, pots and pans magically putting themselves away when James walked into the room and collapsed into a chair.

"Did you get him settled in his room, dear?" Euphemia asked.

"Yeah, he's settled." James looked around at his family. "He's not okay."

They nodded in agreement.

"Did you see how he looks? If Harry's 15 then he's 35 but he looks 60 at least. Did he talk to you at all?" Lily asked.

"Not about anything important." James sighed. "He seems to have reverted back to his childhood habit of protecting me from the ugly bits of his life."

"He'll talk when he's ready," Fleamont said. "He's just arrived. Give him time."

"Last time we gave him time, his mother almost killed him," Euphemia reminded Fleamont. Her heart ached for the broken child that came to them that night. What kind of mother could do that to her own child? She remembered how hurt he was, how she had to hurt him more in order to heal him and now her son was home and injured again but these weren't broken bones and cuts that she could heal with spells and ointments. She felt tears coming to her eyes and busied herself at the sink.

Fleamont walked over to Euphemia and put his arms around her.

"His mother certainly isn't HERE now," James spat. "If there's anyone that deserves to be...elsewhere...it's that bitch." Memories of howlers, nightmares, and bruised faces screamed through his head like a speeding locomotive.

"Let's try to push him a little more tomorrow to open up to us," Lily suggested. "We don't have to interrogate him. Just let him know that we love him and want to help."

**********************************************************************************************

James was laying on his back in the darkness of his bedroom, unable to sleep. Lily was quiet next to him, sleeping? He wasn't sure but didn't want to wake her. He was lost in a memory anyway. All aboard the Hogwarts Express!

_Flashback_

_Sirius Black lugged his trunk into the empty compartment with as much grace as a trunk the same size as himself would allow which for him was quite a bit of grace. He hefted the trunk into the storage area, flipped his long black hair out of his cool gray eyes and sat down. His first train to Hogwarts. The first day of the rest of his life or just a continuation of his miserable existence. He'd been bouncing between dreams and nightmares for weeks and was glad to finally be off._

_Another boy entered behind him. Short dark hair and glasses and an easy smile. He extended his hand to Sirius. "Hi, I'm James Potter."_

_Sirius registered the name and swiftly scanned the list of 28 families though he was pretty sure it wasn't there. Some ridiculous reason that he'd been told and promptly forgotten or he's Muggle born. He realized James' hand was still outstretched and took it. Manners like languages and art and music appreciation had been instilled at a young age in the Black household. "Sirius Black," he said carefully, searching the boy's face for recognition. The recognition flickered but the smile didn't shift. Sirius relaxed slightly. His family didn't have the best reputation outside of certain circles. Of course, within those certain circles, the Blacks were the top of the food chain. According to his mother, no one outside those certain circles mattered at all anyway._

_"Are you a first year?" James asked shoving his trunk into the storage area beside Sirius' trunk._

_"Yeah, are you?" Sirius asked._

_"Yeah." James sat down next to Sirius. "I'm a bit nervous," he confessed. Why did I say that? "My mum and dad told me a bit but...."_

_Not Muggle born, Sirius thought. "My cousin is a fourth year and has been an excellent source of information," he volunteered._

_"Well, what are you waiting for? Spill!" James demanded, turning to face Sirius._

_Sirius almost laughed at James' enthusiasm. He liked this kid. "Well, Andromeda said that it's quite a long journey on this train and then a boat ride but only the first years do that. And then we go to the Great Hall and there's a Sorting Hat." He looked pensive._

_"My dad mentioned the Sorting Hat," James confirmed. "I reckon I'll be in Gryffindor since my parents and grandparents were."_

_Sirius tried to hide his disappointment. He did like this kid but the likelihood of a Black being put anywhere but Slytherin.... But Andromeda thought maybe...._

_"What's wrong?" James asked._

_"Nothing," Sirius lied easily. Black family trait, he thought bitterly. If you hate it, stop doing it. He took a breath. "My family's been in Slytherin for a thousand years. Literally a thousand years," he said quickly, blurting it out._

_"Oh," James sounded disappointed. I like this kid but.... "Maybe you'll be the exception! You don't seem like a Slytherin to me."_

_Sirius brightened. "Thanks," he smiled. Dared briefly to hope. "What's Gryffindor like?"_

_"Gryffindor is where the brave and courageous and loyal people go. The best house!" James insisted._

_"Sounds like the opposite of Slytherin." Sirius thought for a moment. "Do you think I could ask the Sorting Hat to put me in there instead?"_

_James thought about this. He really wasn't sure if the Sorting Hat did take requests. His dad hadn't said but then he hadn't thought to ask. "I don't know. I guess it wouldn't hurt to try though." He looked almost shyly at Sirius. "I hope it does."_

_Sirius realized what he meant, that he hoped that they were in the same house and smiled. Is this what having a friend felt like? "Me too."_

_The trolley witch popped in and they bought a ridiculous amount of treats between them, trading and sharing._

_"So what's your favorite Quidditch team?" James asked with a mouthful of chocolate frog._

_"The Chudley Cannons," Sirius answered with a mouthful of Bertie Bot Beans. "What's yours?"_

_"Me too! Did you see the...."_

_End of Flashback_

James couldn't remember everything they talked about on the train but he remembered one thing: he knew even then that Sirius would be his best mate for the rest of his life. He smiled at the memory but was jerked out of his reverie by a scream from the room next door. He sat up quickly, followed by a bleary eyed Lily.

"What was that?" Lily murmured sleepily.

"Go back to sleep. I'll take care of it." James stood and padded quickly next door and entered without knocking.

Sirius was twisting on the bed, clearly in the throes of a nightmare. "Harry... Harry, watch out..." he mumbled. "NO!" he screamed.

James sat down on the bed and then laid down next to Sirius putting his arms around him. "Wake up, Pads. Just a nightmare. Let it go. Let go," he whispered softly. "Just a nightmare. Wake up."

Sirius slowly calmed and opened his eyes. "James...."

"I thought you'd gotten too old for this," James said slightly teasing.

Sirius' eyes darkened. He tried to pull away a bit but James held on.

"I was joking." James forced Sirius to look him in the eyes. "I know there's a whole lot more that you're not telling us. That something went really, really wrong."

"No, nothing's wrong. It's...." Sirius tried to object.

"Yes, it is. You don't have to tell me right now but you do have to tell me and sooner rather than later. This isn't going to be a repeat of that "my eye is blackened because I'm clumsy and hit it on the cupboard door" rubbish."

"I don't want to talk about it," Sirius whispered. "Please don't make me."

"If you don't talk about it, I can't help you carry it and I plan to help you carry it. Whatever it is," James said quietly. "I won't let you deal with it alone. Not tonight though. Tonight, sleep. Recover. Tomorrow though you're going to tell us and we're going to help you whether you like it or not." He grinned slightly and thought he saw the tiniest of smiles from his best friend. "Now roll over so I can spoon you until you fall asleep."

Sirius considered this offer and then sighed and rolled over so he could be the little spoon. "We shan't speak of this."

"Of course not. We never do," said the big spoon.


	4. Confession is Good for the Soul

Sirius awoke to bright sun filtering through his window illuminating the Gryffindor banners on the walls. He blinked his eyes, trying to remember where he was and who was spooning him. He realized that it was James and smiled at him over his shoulder and then remembered...the rest. He tried to extricate himself from the big spoon without waking him but failed.

"Where are you going?" James sat up, trying to move his arm, realizing it was dead asleep. "Ow! My arm! You've killed it."

"Perhaps you shouldn't sneak into a man's bed in the middle of the night then," Sirius tried to joke. "Let that be a lesson to you."

"Maybe if that man wasn't screaming in the middle of the night even though'nothing's wrong', I wouldn't need to,"James replied not joking at all.

Sirius stared at him with haunted eyes. "I don't want you to know. I don't want you to look at me the way they looked at me. The way even Remus looked at me. Like I was broken...beyond repair."

"You're not broken beyond repair," James murmured.

Sirius stared at him without much hope. "You don't know that."

James looked back at Sirius and spoke somewhat harshly. "That's utter bollocks. I don't know what happened to you -- though you ARE going to tell me -- but whatever it was, whatever broke you...you're the strongest person I know. You won't let yourself be permanently broken." His tone softened. "I won't let you be permanently broken."

"I want to believe that...."

"Believe it. First step though is breakfast. Can you smell that? No doubt Mum's fixed all your favorites. Food and then maybe some fresh air is in order? Prongs hasn't been out in FOREVER!"

Sirius almost smiled and let James pull him to his feet and out the door.

*******************************************************************************************************

James and Sirius walked into the kitchen to stacks of pancakes, bacon, bangers and eggs.

Euphemia saw them come in and hugged Sirius. "Good morning, dear. How did you sleep? I made all your favorites." She let go of Sirius and led him to the chair beside hers. She started heaping food on a plate.

Sirius smiled at Euphemia torn between how good it felt to see her, to see all of them and the guilt and the...other that still plagued him. He tried to push the rest aside and nibbled at a banger. Fleamont was asking him something.

"Did you ever finish the motorbike?" Fleamont asked. They'd all agreed to keep the topics safe and upbeat at least during breakfast.

Sirius flashed to the last time he saw the motorbike and felt the dementors shoving out the happiness of breakfast with his family. No. He tried to block them out. "Yeah, I finished it."

Fleamont felt the change in his son's mood. Maybe there are no safe questions.

"It was brilliant!" James exclaimed. "We took it everywhere. Even on missions. Remember that one time that the muggle police caught us?"

Sirius shook off the other memory and focused on what James was saying. "Yeah that was a fun one. Poor blokes. Definitely got a good obliviate spell that night!"

"Do you still see the old Order crowd?" Lily asked.

"They're mostly dead," Sirius said. "Just Remus and Moody left really of the old Order. We've been recruiting new members, of course. Arthur and Molly and their son, Bill. A bit difficult with the Ministry and the Daily Prophet saying that Voldemort's dead."

"There will be no talk of Voldemort at the breakfast table," Euphemia stated. "How is Remus?"

"He's okay, I guess. Nobody will hire him so he has to take these awful jobs like cleaning up doxie outbreaks," Sirius said carefully. "Now that the Order is back though he's been off on Order business. He taught at Hogwarts for a year. Defense Against the Dark Arts. Harry thought he was brilliant."

"Only a year?" Lily asked.

"People found out he was a werewolf," Sirius explained. "That was the end of it. That's always the end of it."

"It must have been odd for Harry to have Uncle Moony as a teacher," James said.

Sirius paled and focused on his bangers. "Yeah I suppose," he mumbled.

Lily looked questioningly at James who shrugged.

"So we know what Remus has been up to, what have you been doing all these years, son?" Euphemia asked.

Sirius' face paled even further.

"Actually, Sirius promised to go play outside with me and I'm afraid I must hold him to that promise," James said standing up. "Ready?"

Sirius breathed an audible sigh of relief and nodded. He stood and walked toward the backdoor followed closely by James. "Thank you."

"It's just a reprieve. You're still going to have to tell us," James said. "But first...." He transformed into Prongs and ran toward the woods.

Sirius transformed to Padfoot and chased after him.

*****************************************************************************************************************

Padfoot and Prongs frolicked in the summer breeze, chasing rabbits, scaring off actual deer, and generally making a nuisance of themselves as far as the rest of nature was concerned. It was the best either of them had felt in ages. After a bit, they laid down beside the lake several miles from the Potter house and returned to their human forms laughing and exhausted.

"I didn't realize how much I needed that," panted James. "I can't remember the last time I changed. It's not as much fun by yourself."

"I've actually spent quite a lot of time as Padfoot in the last 14 years but not like this," Sirius said gazing up at the sun. He almost felt...happy.

James rolled over to look at Sirius. "May I ask why without getting my head bitten off?"

"Various reasons," Sirius said vaguely trying to hold on to the happy feeling.

"Reasons that you might elaborate on?" James pressed.

Sirius continued to look up at the sky, basking in the sun. "I've also just realized that I haven't been outside in almost a year. This sun feels wonderful."

James tried to swallow his shock. "Why the hell haven't you been outside, Pads? Not at all?"

Sirius sighed. "I can't keep this to myself, can I?"

"No. Especially not if you're going to make comments like'I haven't been outside in a year'."

"If I'm going to have to tell this story, I'd really rather only do it once." Sirius sat up. "Let's get the Spanish Inquisition over with, shall we?"

*****************************************************************************************************

They found the others in the garden in deep conversation that stopped as soon as they saw Sirius.

Sirius pretended not to notice. He didn't blame them. This was how everyone behaved around him now.

"Did you have a nice romp in the woods, honey?" Lily asked leaning over to kiss James as he sat down beside her.

"Some day, the two of you are going to account for how you became illegal animagi at age 15." Euphemia pretended to be mad but her proud smile gave her away.

"Before we share the details of that stupendous accomplishment, Sirius wants to tell us what happened to him," James said.

"So that romp in the woods did you good, son," Fleamont smiled at Sirius and clapped his shoulder. "You can tell us anything. We just want to help."

The love and sincerity in Fleamont's voice made Sirius well up a bit as it always did. His actual parents couldn't find it in their hearts to love him but these two had plenty of extra love to spare and he soaked it up greedily even while not wanting to admit how much he needed it, needed them.

All eyes were upon him now and Sirius knew he was going to have to tell this story but wishing he could apparate anywhere but here. But he didn't want to go anywhere else -- all he wanted was to stay here with these people, his family, and to do that, he had to tell them the truth. All of it. He sighed knowing it was going to be difficult. He'd managed to avoid telling anyone the details of what happened that night. To tell would be to relive and he wasn't sure he was strong enough to survive that. "I guess I should start the night...it...happened."

_Flashback_

_Sirius walked into the small, dilapidated cottage in the woods outside Bibury. "Oi Peter! I brought supper."_

_No answer._

_"Peter?" Sirius tossed the sack of take-away on the tiny kitchen table and opened the bedroom door. "Peter?" He felt his stomach start to twist as the panic set in. "Peter?!?"_

_The silence in the cottage was absolute._

_Sirius ran to the back door, yelling now. "PETER! WORMTAIL! Where are you?"_

_Nothing. And deep down Sirius knew why, knew what had happened. He felt the roiling in his gut, his head swam. Get to James. NOW._

_Sirius sprinted out the door leaving it flapping in the brisk October wind as he jumped on his motorbike, forcing it upward faster than it really cared to go. He flew to Godric's Hollow as fast as the motorbike would allow. No, no, no, no, no. Please, Merlin, no. If he was too late.... He tried to block out the thoughts but the terror was overwhelming and then he saw the house...the rubble.... He dropped the bike still a few feet in the air and ran toward the ruins. "James! Lily!" Panic and adrenaline scorched his veins as he tossed around the beams and plaster, searching. "James!" Silence. "James please!" he begged. "Please answer me!" Silence upon silence. Someone was screaming. It was a moment before he realized that it was he who was screaming._

_Sirius found the body then. Felt cold skin on his hands. James, lifeless in the rubble, his glasses askew. Sirius felt the world go dark around him, felt sobs wracking his body. He hugged James to him, shaking him. "James, wake up...." The rational part of his brain knew that James was gone but that part seemed to be growing smaller by the second. He sobbed into James' shirt, knocked off his glasses. "Sorry mate...I'll get them." Where did they go? He couldn't find the glasses in the darkness, in the wreckage, and panicked. Where are they? He started digging, bloodying his knuckles in his desperation. He finally found them and gently put them back on James' pale, still face. He heard a noise upstairs and turned. "Lily?" He gently laid James down, got up and stumbled to the stairs, tripping over fallen beams in his haste to get to Lily. "Lily!" He ran headlong into Hagrid coming down the stairs and fell back against a caving wall._

_"Hagrid?" Sirius asked dazed. He saw the baby in Hagrid's arms. "Harry! He's okay?" The smallest sliver of light in the darkness._

_"Somehow survived the whole thing, he did," Hagrid replied, cradling the child protectively._

_"Lily?" Sirius asked._

_Hagrid shook his head._

_Sirius ran up the demolished stairs tripping several times in the debris and his haste. He got to the room and found Lily's lifeless body beside the crib. He crumbled beside her, holding her in his lap, sobbing into her hair. He felt Hagrid kneel beside him and put an awkward arm around his shoulders but none of that mattered anymore. He felt the world spiraling like some apparation gone horribly wrong. He felt himself splinching in a thousand different directions never to be whole again._

_Sirius woke up smelling grass with no idea where he was...and then it returned. The ruins of the house, James' broken body, Lily's broken body, the excruciating pain that seemed to be resonating from Sirius' very soul. He looked up and saw Hagrid holding Harry in his arms, singing some nonsensical song to him about fairies._

_Sirius dragged himself to his feet though he felt like there was a 10 ton weight magically attached to his chest, pushing him down, restricting his airways. He tried to banish James and Lily from his mind. Only Harry mattered now. Getting him out of here. Getting him somewhere safe. Trying to give him some shell of the life that James and Lily would have wanted for him. "Hagrid, you need to give me Harry. We need to get going before anyone else shows up." His brain was already outlining potential scenarios, each location more remote than the next. Tibet, Timbuktu, the Amazon rain forest, they could join a primitive tribe. "Come on, Hagrid. Give me the baby."_

_"I canna do that," Hagrid mumbled unable to look Sirius in the eyes._

_"What? Of course you can," Sirius said. "I'm his godfather. His legal guardian in case..." He couldn't say the words. He glanced at the demolished house. "Just give me Harry and we'll be on our way."_

_"I canna do that. Dumbledore said I was to bring the boy back to him. He's going to take him to live with his aunt and uncle."_

_"The Dursleys?" Sirius cried. "Lily hates her sister! She'd never want her to raise Harry."_

_Hagrid considered this briefly but he had his orders and he was Dumbledore's man through and through. "Dumbledore said he was to live with his aunt and uncle and that's what I'm going to do."_

_"But they're Muggles, Hagrid! He can't be raised by Muggles."_

_"I'm sure they're perfectly fine people."_

_"They're not! You should have seen some of the letters Petunia would send to Lily. They were almost as bad as my howlers! Please Hagrid, you have to let me take Harry."_

_"I canna do that, Sirius. I have my orders."_

_"Fuck your orders! His parents are dead..." Sirius felt the sobs coming again. "...and he can't live with people who will hate him!"_

_Hagrid stared back at Sirius unmoved._

_Sirius felt his blood turn to ice as he stared at the obstinate, order following half giant. He couldn't physically take Harry from Hagrid. Spells and hexes wouldn't be strong enough to penetrate and a killing curse...Sirius knew he couldn't do it. Not to Hagrid. He couldn't even physically fight him. Everything was ice now. Even his tears felt iced over. He spoke not even recognizing his own voice. "Take my motorbike and get Harry to safety. I won't be needing it anymore." I won't be needing anything anymore, he thought. The world ended tonight. Nothing left now but rubble...and vengeance. And if he died trying, who was there to care? Certainly not him. There was nothing left to live for. Only things to kill for._

_End of Flashback_

Sirius took a deep breath trying to focus on the feel of Lily's hand in his. Warm and alive not cold and still. He looked at James and saw horror in his eyes. Anger. He had every right to be angry. Sirius chose the wrong traitor, let Dumbledore put Harry with strangers who hated him. Anger is exactly the emotion James should be feeling. He couldn't bring himself to look at Lily or Euphemia. Couldn't take their disappointment on top of it all. Had he looked, he would have seen tears and sadness for what he went through but he couldn't risk it. It was taking every ounce of self control he had not to fall apart.

"What happened next, son?" Fleamont asked softly, red eyed, bringing Sirius back to the story.

Sirius mustered his internal resources, took a deep breath and continued. "I found Peter really very easily which probably should have raised a red flag but it didn't. He was on a busy muggle street in broad daylight. I guessed he thought he was safe there but now I realize...." He shook his head. "I pulled my wand out but before I could muster up what I guessed was needed for a killing curse, Peter did the strangest thing. It's like it all happened in slow motion, like a dream and like a dream, I couldn't bloody move. I just stood there like I was trapped in quicksand. He yelled "you betrayed James and Lily to Voldemort" and then he cut off his finger, caused a massive explosion, turned into a rat and scurried away." He looked up at James. "It was bloody brilliant. Here I was holding my wand out like a tosser staring at a bunch of dead Muggles and he gets away scot free. Completely outsmarted by Peter Fucking Pettigrew. How does that even happen? That borderline SQUIB outsmarted ME? I'm not sure why I started laughing but I did and I couldn't stop. Whatever was hinged had become unhinged. Which is what I was doing when the aurors and the muggle police and the dementors arrived. Holding my wand out and laughing like a fucking maniac. It's no wonder they threw me in Azkaban."

"Azkaban?" James gasped.

"You mean just until the trial, right?" Lily added.

"Trial? There was no trial," Sirius said failing to hide his bitterness.

Fleamont was furious. "What do you mean 'there was no trial'? How could there be no trial? You worked for THEM!" His years in the auror's office, his highly developed sense of fair play and his love for his son mixed into rage. "There are ways to prove these things. Weren't you questioned under veritaserum? They could have used priori incantatem to see if your wand had even performed the spell. We don't just put people into Azkaban without a trial!"

Sirius considered this for what seemed like the first time. "They didn't do any of that," he said softly. Why didn't they do any of that?

"Where was Dumbledore in all this?" James asked. "You should have asked to see him. He would have helped you."

Sirius looked at James. "He's the one who took me to Azkaban. Testified against me. They all thought I was the secret keeper. They didn't know we changed to Peter."

"No...." James looked sick. "This can't be true. Not Azkaban." Even as he said the words, he knew it was true, had known, on some level, since he'd looked into his best friend's eyes during yesterday's joyous reunion. He felt the tears coming, tried to blink them back. "I'm so sorry. I can't... this can't be.... Not Azkaban...."

Euphemia moved to sit closer to Sirius, rubbing his back to provide comfort that he couldn't quite accept. Not yet.

"Was it horrible? Of course, it was horrible. I just...." Lily trailed off. What do you say to someone who's spent years being fed on by dementors? She leaned against Sirius' arm wanting him to know that she was there. That she loved him.

James gathered himself, knowing that he needed to be the strong one right now. That Sirius needed him to be strong even if he didn't know it, even if he was about to really piss him off. "You need to tell us," he ordered.

Fleamont nodded gravely.

Sirius sighed already exhausted. "No. You don't need the details."

"No, we don't, but you need to give them. Have you talked to anyone about this? Remus? Or did you just shove it all into the recesses of your brain hoping it would go away?" James asked knowing the answer.

Sirius glared at James knowing he already knew the answer.

"Sirius, I love you. We all love you. But you keeping things to yourself invariably ends badly. For everyone but most especially for you. So you're going to give the details and you're going to do it now," James demanded. It killed him to use this tone after everything he'd just heard but it had to be done. Sirius had to let go of this.

_Flashback_

_A montage of images through many years._

_Sirius, still clean shaven, sat on the floor of a 6 x 6 cell. The cell was populated by nothing but a rickety cot with a single threadbare blanket. He wore the white and black striped uniform of Azkaban though the cloth was clean and bright. The uncontrollable laughter had finally died away leaving silence. He hadn't spoken at all since Peter's perfect plan had unfolded. No one had asked him to speak, to answer questions, to explain himself, to defend himself. Someone had administered a silencing spell to stop the noise of the laughter and even though the spell had long since worn off, Sirius couldn't think of anything he might want to say. Who would he even say it to? He could hear his fellow inmates, their shrieks and sobs and moans as they slowly lost their minds. A symphony of abject misery. How long until he joined the symphony?_

_Sirius felt his brain poking around at the memories from Godric's Hollow. No. He didn't want to remember James like that. James wouldn't want to be remembered like that. He'd want to be remembered winning the Quidditch Cup their fourth year. Sirius smiled to himself at the memory of the victory party. They'd used the Cup as a cup for a great deal of firewhiskey which resulted in their first real hangovers but it had been worth it. Such a happy night._

_Sirius didn't notice the icy cold at first. The prison was already cold. No heat and the night falling but should it be this cold? And then he felt...them. The dementors. He'd heard about them, of course, but words couldn't possibly explain the feeling of absolute hopelessness that he now felt in the depths of his soul. His brain let loose the memories of James' and Lily's cold, still bodies then. Pale faces that would never again smile at him. No one would ever smile at him again because the entire world had frozen over. Hope, love, friendship, all just words with no meaning to him now. And you deserve it. The words came unbidden into his thoughts and he knew with everything inside him that it was true. He deserved this._

*****************************

_Sirius, full beard on his face, sat in his cell conversing with James' rotting corpse._

_"I'm so sorry, Prongs. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I did this to you," Sirius cried out loud._

_"If you're looking for disagreement, you've come to the wrong place," Corpse-James said bitterly. "You killed me. You killed Lily. You've left Harry to be raised by people who hate him."_

_Sirius hung his head. "I know. I know. I'm so sorry."_

_"I'm the one who's sorry," said Corpse-James. "I should have known you'd do this. I should have known the moment you told me your name. Sirius BLACK. You're just like the rest of your family. I wish we'd never met."_

_"I'm not. I'm not like them," Sirius said as much to convince himself as Corpse-James. "I love you, James. I never meant for this to happen."_

_"But it did happen, Black, and it's all your fault. I hate you," Corpse-James snarled. "Everyone hates you."_

_Sirius put his face in his hands to cover the tears but nothing could drown out the sobs. He no longer even saw the dementors hovering outside his cell. Their ever constant presence was his new normal._

***********************************************************

_"Sirius?"_

_Sirius looked up quickly toward the direction of the voice. "Remus?"_

_Remus stood outside the cell where the dementors had been hovering._

_"Remus, is that you?" Sirius dragged himself to his feet and stumbled to the bars. "You're here!" He fought back the tears of relief. "You're here. I didn't do this. You have to believe me."_

_Remus looked Sirius in the eyes, eyes that were already starting to shimmer with madness. He saw his long beard, his tear stained cheeks and then smiled but the smile was cruel not comforting. "Of course, you did this. It's what we all expected of you. Your parents must finally be proud of you. Delivering the Potters to Voldemort. Preserving the Black name," Remus spat out the word "Black" as if it was poison. "You betrayed your best friend. You betrayed us all."_

_"Remus, no, it was Peter! He was the secret keeper," Sirius insisted, his voice desperate. "It was Peter."_

_"I wish I'd never met you," Remus said coldly._

_"No, please, Remus. You have to believe me," Sirius pleaded his eyes downcast._

_"Lies," Remus said icily._

_When Sirius looked up, Remus was gone and the dementors had returned. Their icy despair dropped him back down to the floor. Remus was right, of course. He'd betrayed them all._

****************************************************

_Sirius laid on the floor of his cell in a fetal position. His beard was long and tangled and dirty as was his prison uniform. He stared blankly at the legs of his cot but inside his head, the voices of James, Lily, Remus, the Potters, Harry...everyone who he had ever loved...joined together in a chorus of hatred. He found he didn't mind so much. They were right to hate him and he liked having them around. He felt the ice creep in. This was worse. The voices died in an instant leaving nothing in their place. Absolute nothing. This was the unbearable part. He stared at the leg of his cot and then reached out to it. He rubbed his wrist against the sharp edge, enjoying the pain. At least it was something. He rubbed until the blood flowed and then switched wrists. He felt the black creeping at the edges of his consciousness and welcomed it._

**********************************************

_Sirius awoke in his cell lying flat on his back on the floor with his wrists bandaged and his cot and blanket gone. The cell was now completely empty except for himself. He groggily raised his head to see a human guard on the other side of the bars._

_"Nice try, Black," the guard said. "Did you really think it would be that easy?"_

_The guard walked away and the dementors floated back to the cell. They came in through the bars and hovered around Sirius like they'd just found a particularly well stocked buffet._

_Sirius let them feed. He had no more strength to fight, nothing left worth fighting for. Day after day, month after month, the buffet remained open until there was no more food on the table. The images of his true family had been devoured both happy and sad and hateful and all that was left was Peter. The friend who betrayed them all. Sirius found himself thinking more and more about Peter, how angry he was at Peter. He started thinking about all the warning signs that Peter gave and his rage grew. He thought about everything they did for Peter, helping him, befriending him and his rage grew. He thought of Lily's kindness toward Peter and his rage grew. He thought of Peter playing with baby Harry when he must have already turned to Voldemort and his rage grew by infinity. His rage grew until there was nothing left but rage._

_End of Flashback_

  
No one said anything. What was there to say? No words could express the horror of what they'd just heard and no words could take away the horror of what Sirius had experienced.

Sirius slowly became aware of Lily sobbing quietly into his bicep and Euphemia rubbing his back. He looked around at their faces expecting pity which would have fed his anger but instead he saw devastation. Love. Empathy but no pity. He calmed a bit and continued.

"Rage turned out to be a fairly good defense against the dementors. Rage doesn't taste as good to them as grief and guilt and happy memories. So I focused on the rage, that I was innocent, that Peter did this, and it sort of kept them at bay. My brain started functioning sort of normally again. After a few more years, I even managed to transform to Padfoot which was a huge relief. I couldn't always be a dog, of course. There were human guards and no one knew I was an animagus but at night when it was only the dementors...."

"Animals feel emotions much differently than humans," James explained to the non-animagi in the group. "The dementors only feed on human emotions?"

Sirius nodded. "So it seems. It was still awful, of course. I had to be human during the day and the dementors were still dreadful. And it was bloody boring as hell but it was survivable after that."

"But you didn't die in Azkaban," James stated.

Sirius almost smiled. "Oh no. I escaped, of course."

James beamed a proud smile. "Of course."

"But no one has ever escaped Azkaban. It's absolutely secure," Fleamont pointed out. "How did you manage it?"

"First comes why. It hadn't actually occurred to me to try to escape. No one had ever managed it, like you said, and I felt like maybe I deserved to be there. It was my fault that Peter was the secret keeper. I may as well have killed James and Lily myself."

James shook his head. "No, that's ridiculous...."

Sirius ignored James. He knew the truth no matter what comforting words James may say. "Besides, what did I really have to go back to? But then Cornelius Fudge showed up...he's the Minister for Magic now...still the same waste of oxygen that he's always been though. "

Fleamont nodded in agreement. "Always was a pompous windbag."

"Anyway, he was doing some sort of inspection and I see he's got a copy of the Daily Prophet in his hand and who is on the cover but a lovely red-headed family with umpteen kids, the youngest boy of which has a very familiar looking rat on his shoulder."

"Peter," said James.

"Peter indeed. I would have recognized him anywhere. I asked Fudge if I could have the paper...said I missed doing the crossword. He looked at me like I was a complete sociopath but gave it to me. So I read the article and it's even worse than I thought. The family is the Weasleys, the kid is in Gryffindor and he's Harry's age so Peter is most likely living with Harry! Ready to strike as soon as Voldemort tells him to. Sure everyone says Voldemort's dead but no way that's true. There wasn't even a body. So I do the only thing I can do -- I turn into Padfoot and thanks to 12 years of malnourishment, slip out through the bars and walk out the door. The dementors don't even notice. The swim across the North Sea almost killed me, of course...malnourishment both a blessing and a curse...but I had to get to Harry, had to kill Peter before he could get to Harry. I couldn't fail again."

"You didn't fail the first time," James said softly.

"I did. We all know I did. I made the wrong choice and you and Lily and Harry paid the price for it," Sirius said ruefully.

" WE made the wrong choice and you paid too. Maybe more than we did. Azkaban....." Lily said softly, her voice haunted. "I won't allow you to blame yourself for what happened to us. We all agreed to use Peter. None of us saw what he really was."

"I should have seen...." Sirius shook his head and sighed. "Once I recovered from my swim, I went to Little Whinging to check on Harry. See how he was doing with your sister. I understand that Dumbledore thought that the blood relation would provide additional protection but growing up somewhere where everyone hates you is a tough path. I should know, right? Never won any popularity contests in the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black," he said bitterly. "Anyway, when I got there, he was lugging his trunk down the street -- apparently running away from home at age 13. At least I lasted until I was nearly 16," he snarked. "I learned later that he had accidentally turned his Aunt Marge into a hot air balloon." Aside to James, "Well deserved by the way."

"No doubt well deserved," Lily huffed. She tried not to think of her sister's letters, tried not to think about what kind of mother the woman who wrote those letters would have been to her son.

"I think I scared him -- big black dog staring at you and all -- because he fell off the curb which summoned the Knight Bus. He got on and I couldn't follow him after that so I went to Hogwarts to look for Peter. After that, it was a game of cat and mouse --literally, I convinced Hermione's cat, Crookshanks, to help me kill Peter. She was a smart cat so I was able to explain most of what happened and why Peter needed to die. Alas, Peter proved elusive and eventually, being Peter, faked his own death again like the coward that he is. Someone really needs to get that Sorting Hat looked at because how he ended up in Gryffindor...."

"Tangent, Sirius," James interrupted.

"Sorry, old habits."

"I know, mate, but get on with it." James smiled to himself as Sirius began to show signs of "old habits" and also his old face becoming younger and lighter as the story progressed (younger Sirius played by Alexander Dreymon).

"I'd just about given up finding him. Assumed he'd fled. That's when I saw the three kids walking out of Hagrid's hut and there he was in Ron's hands. I couldn't let him get away again so I attacked, grabbed Ron's sweater in my jaws and dragged him into the tunnel to the Shrieking Shack. Broke Ron's leg which I felt really bad about.... I got him up to the bedroom of the shack and then turned back into a human to deal with the rat. Harry and Hermione followed us, of course. True Gryffindors that they are. So Harry sees me and is so angry at the man who betrayed his parents that he forgets that he has a wand and tries to beat me to death with his bare hands. I don't blame him, mind you -- I'd like to do the same to Peter but I can't because Harry's really angry and it takes everything I have along with a lot of help from that brilliant cat, Crookshanks, to get their bloody wands away from them. That's when Remus showed up."

"Surely, Remus knew you were innocent," Euphemia said.

"He didn't. He believed what they all believed. That I was capable of betraying my best friends. I guess, in the end, everyone just assumed I'd regressed to the Black mean. People born into that family don't really change," Sirius said bitterly.

Fleamont's eyes flashed in anger. "Bollocks."

"You were never like them," James said angrily.

"Thank you for that," Sirius said sincerely. "But it's a minority viewpoint, I'm afraid. Anyway, while Remus had believed me guilty, our special little map had recently made him doubt himself thus his bursting in. The kids were quite disappointed, of course. They thought he would save them from the scary murderer but he sided with me instead. Remus tried to explain to Harry that we'd switched secret keepers. Apparently, my yelling "I have to kill him!" wasn't sufficient explanation and was, in fact, quite alarming to Harry who had been told that I was trying to kill HIM. My communication skills had been woefully underused during my stay in Azkaban, I suppose. Anyway, Remus seemed to be making some headway with them though it was taking forever, had even given them back their wands, when Snape showed up."

"Snape?" James growled.

"What was Severus doing there?" Lily asked.

"Dumbledore made him potions professor after the wizarding war ended," Sirius explained.

"Dumbledore made a Death Eater the potions teacher and put YOU in Azkaban????" James roared.

"Well, when you put it that way, it does seem suspect," Sirius admitted. "Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. Snape showed up being Snivelly with his Snivelly comments. "Can't wait to see you get a Dementor's Kiss, Black! Lupin too!" and then Harry, Hermione, and Ron all yell "Expellariamus!" at the same time and knocked him out. I mean, unconscious. I would have laughed had I not been feeling so homicidal."

James smiled proudly.

"So Harry believed you?" Lily asked.

"Well, part of it was that he hates Snape even more than I do but yeah, he's starting to believe us but he wants proof. He wants us to change the rat into Peter. So after a bit of chasing, Remus and I manage to get him back into human form though he still looks like a rat to me and I still want to kill him. Remus agrees that Peter needs to die and we agree to do it together but Harry...the voice of reason...thinks that you wouldn't want us to become killers." Sirius sighed. "Which was probably true."

"It wouldn't be my preference though I would have been okay with it in this case," James said.

"Noted. Unfortunately, the opportunity is long past. So instead of killing him, we bind him so we can take him to Hogwarts and get my name cleared which I'm pretty excited about as you can well imagine. I even have some time to finally get to know my godson who turns out to be a really great kid when he's not trying to kill me. He even wanted to live with me instead of the Dursleys which granted, isn't a really high bar to jump over but still.... Anyway, I'm starting to think that maybe I can get some version of my life back when we walk out of the Forbidden Forest and it's a full moon."

"No...." James moaned.

"Oh yes. And it turns out that Snape wasn't just there to be nosy though nosiness was a part of it, of course. Some things don't change. He was, in fact, also there because Remus forgot to take his wolfsbane potion. There's a potion now that sort of controls his shifts though I think it may be killing him. He still turns but he's not violent anymore. It's sort of strange actually to see a werewolf sitting calmly in the library reading a book and sipping tea. Anyway, topic for another time..... So Remus does what he does. He can't help it. So I do the only thing I can do which is to change into Padfoot and try to tackle him before he can hurt anyone. Peter takes the opportunity to transform as well and scurries off into the darkness never to be found again and Snape FINALLY wakes up completely missing Peter, of course."

"No one's going to believe a bunch of kids and Remus...." Lily said sadly.

"That's what I thought too. Anyway so Remus and I go at it and it doesn't go well for me. He hasn't really turned in awhile and it's not like it used to be. The next thing I remember was laying beside the lake back in human form with what felt like my intestines hanging out and dementors gathering around me. Harry'd caught up to me by then but Remus' attempts to teach him to produce a patronus had been unsuccessful because he couldn't do it any more than I could. I'm sure we would have both had our souls sucked out had Snape..." he spat "...not saved us."

"Must have been like Christmas for him," James said bitterly.

"Do bats even celebrate Christmas? Who knows? Anyway, next thing I know I'm in a tower in Hogwarts waiting to be taken back to Azkaban for the Dementor's Kiss and Peter's still on the loose though, at least, Ron won't be getting any more pet rats. Albus came by then to talk to me and I tried to explain everything that happened, that we changed the secret keepers, that I didn't do it, that I would never betray you. He seemed to listen. FINALLY. But he said that there wasn't any proof without Peter. The word of some kids and a werewolf wasn't going to be enough and nobody else saw Peter." He looked heartbroken as he relived the memory. "So he left and I waited for the dementors wondering what it would feel like to not have a soul anymore." The haunted look in his eyes had returned but no one quite knew how to make it go away again. He tried to shake himself out of the gloom, get back to the story. "So imagine my surprise when Harry and Hermione pull up outside my window on a Hippogriff."

"What????" James and Lily exclaimed.

"A hippogriff. Turns out Hagrid had one that Lucius Malfoy was trying to have executed so Dumbledore figured they could save two lives at once and provided him to me as a getaway ...hippogriff."

"Wait? So NOW Dumbledore believes you even though there's no more proof than there was to begin with?" Fleamont asked.

"Apparently, the kids were very convincing and our stories matched up," Sirius explained.

Fleamont looked very suspicious of what seemed like, at best, shoddy law enforcement and at worst, shenanigans of the very worst kind.

"So you escaped?" James asked.

"I did. Spent some time in warmer climes, drawing the dementors off, trying to look less like a homeless skeleton...."

"But you still weren't cleared of the charges?" Euphemia asked.

"Why isn't Dumbledore giving you Veritaserum and clearing you of the charges now?" Fleamont demanded. "They had your wand. There are reversal spells. This makes no sense. Since when do we lock people up based on nothing but circumstantial evidence?" The old auror in him was both flummoxed and furious.

"Things had changed by then. Aurors were allowed to kill without question. A lot of people didn't get trials. People were really scared and they let Barty Crouch do what he wanted." Sirius looked puzzled. "As to after, I don't know why Dumbledore didn't use veritaserum or the reversal spell. I guess I was so happy that someone finally believed me...."

"Dad's right. This whole thing isn't right. At all. So you just had to stay away?" James asked.

"And leave Harry with my sister?" Lily added.

"I didn't have a choice. I was still public enemy #1. Everyone was looking for me. I stayed away as long as I could but when someone put Harry's name in the Goblet of Fire, I had to come back. Be close in case he needed me. Or Padfoot did. I spent that year living in the cave at the north end of the Forbidden Forest and eating way more rats than I would care to admit."

"Wait, wait...he was only 14. How could his name be put in?" Fleamont asked.

"Someone who turned out to be Barty Crouch Jr. disguised as Alastor Moody put it in for him along with a spell that kept it from being spit back out. A long scheme designed by Peter to lure Harry to a graveyard so he could use his blood to resurrect Voldemort."

"Harry was wrong about Peter. I would have wanted you to kill him," James said sinisterly.

"I know. Had I known what he was capable of, I would have sent Harry away and done it but I'd never killed anyone before and...."

"You weren't sure you could start with your former friend? Sirius, no one blames you for any of this," Lily said gently.

Sirius shook his head. He blamed himself and always would. "So Voldemort is back, the Death Eaters are back, the war is back," Sirius sighed. "Everything before was for nothing."

"And the Order?" James asked.

"Also back and headquartered in my childhood hell, Grimmauld Place," Sirius spat bitterly. "And since I'm the wizarding world's most wanted fugitive, I can't set a toe outside its doors for fear of being sent back to Azkaban. Nor can I leave England because my godson needs me. I just have to hide like a fucking coward while everyone else does the work. And that house, with the darkness, and the ghosts, and the yelling, and the uselessness, with the dementors in my head...." He couldn't control the emotions anymore.

Euphemia reached Sirius first and pulled his head down on her shoulder stroking his hair while he wept nonsensically. "Shh. Shh. It's okay, son. It'll all be okay now."


	5. Maybe You Can Go Home Again

Later on that night, Sirius laid awake in his bed. HIS bed in HIS room. This room smelled of warmth and safety. Everything that Grimmauld Place was not. But he was still afraid to close his eyes. Afraid that everything he'd had to talk about today would be there waiting for him right behind his eyelids. 

There was a knock at the door and someone came in. He could see in the moonlight that it was James.

"I'm not screaming!" Sirius insisted.

"You're not sleeping either," James replied.

"Well...neither are you," Sirius retorted. Not one of his best, he admitted to himself.

James laid down next to Sirius forcing him to scoot over. They both laid on their backs looking at the ceiling.

"Pads?"

"Yeah Prongs?"

"I really missed you."

"I really missed you too."

They laid there in silence for a few minutes glad of each other's company. 

"How's Moony?" James asked. "Is that potion really killing him?"

"I don't know. Maybe? It's hard to tell what's potion versus malnutrition and basic homelessness. He doesn't look well though. The potion may keep him from losing his humanity during the change but I think it makes the before and after worse. He's sick a lot more. I tried to help him, but you know how he is with taking financial help."

"Yeah, I remember."

"He was living at Grimmauld Place with me when he wasn't on a mission. We had a nice thing going where I would pretend that he was only there because he couldn't afford rent and he would pretend that he was only there because I couldn't be left alone. That way, we could both save some dignity and ignore the truth. That he's destitute and I'm..." he faded away. How does one even put "dementors are stuck in my head" into words that anyone could really understand?

"Azkaban then Grimmauld Place? I swear, I could strangle Dumbledore with my bare hands right now," James said angrily. "Though Dad would beat me to it. Hearing about this "no trial" thing really insulted his sense of justice and that it happened to his son...he's bloody furious about the whole thing."

"I didn't mean to make him angry," Sirius said quietly.

"He's not angry at you. He's angry on your behalf because frankly, neither of us think you're as angry on your own behalf as you should be," James said.

"I may not have done what they said, but I did cause it all."

"A bad choice that WE ALL MADE doesn't warrant a 12 year stint in Azakaban, Sirius!" James turned to face Sirius, his eyes blazing. "I need you to understand that." 

Sirius nodded.

James looked back at the ceiling knowing he'd gotten nowhere. 

"Lily and I used to play this game we called 'What are they doing now?'" James said quietly. "Where we'd make up stories about what you and Harry and Remus were doing. Lily always added some wives to the mix which I could sort of see. I mean, you were always going to be this great adventurer but we sort of saddled you with a baby.... Your wife was always super hot though so you did well for yourself. "

Sirius laughed but also looked a bit sad. One more part of life he would never experience.

"And Remus, that werewolf thing, I wasn't sure if he would get married either but Lily thought he'd find someone who could see beyond it. Like we did."

"He did actually. Or he will once he gets out of his own way," Sirius said.

"Remus has a girlfriend? Do tell," James said in his best gossiping girl voice.

Sirius laughed. "Well, she WANTS to be his girlfriend but he's currently of the opinion that she shouldn't be saddled with his furry little problem."

"Of course. Sounds just like him. Who is she?" James asked.

"My cousin actually," Sirius said. He could hear James mentally going through the possibilities and becoming more and more horrified. "Andromeda's daughter. You remember Andromeda? My one non-horrible relative? She married the muggle born?" 

"Of course. I always liked her," James said. "Does the daughter look like her? Andromeda was quite a stunner as I recall."

"Um.... Well, sort of but...Nymphodora is a metamorphmagus so what she looks like is a bit fluid. Usually, she looks a bit like Andromeda only with bright pink hair."

"Nymphodora?????" James asked. "What was Andromeda thinking?"  
Sirius laughed. "I have NO idea. I will say that no one in their right mind would call her Nymphodora though. She is Tonks, perhaps Dora on a good day. That's how I knew she really liked Remus. He would use her full name and live to tell the tale."

"How did he meet her? Did you introduce them?" James asked.

"No. Andromeda really kept her away from the family. Even from me. Moody recruited her into the Order. She's an auror. Sort of just a fluke that she and Moony hit it off. Her response to learning that he was a werewolf was to change her face to a werewolf. I wasn't sure if he was going to laugh or stalk out. Fortunately, he laughed."

"And he really fancies her?" James asked.

"When she's in the room, you could drop a sack of dungbombs on him and he wouldn't even flinch. Of course, it's Moony so he can't have such nice things and she's too young, she should date someone her own age who doesn't have a furry little problem. You know the drill. We've been hearing it for years."

"I remember," James said.

"So one day, I decided to take matters into my own hands and sat Dora down and gave her every bit of insight into the elusive Moony as I could think of which was substantial. What set him off, what he'd allow. Likes, dislikes, turn ons, turn offs. Really, it's possible that we all knew a bit too much about each other back then."

James laughed. "The downside to living in a dorm room full of horny teenage boys. So you think she can convince him?"  
"There really aren't many "Black" qualities about her -- our house elf won't even take orders from her -- but one thing that is very "Black" about her is that she always seems to get her own way in the end. Really, you'd think he'd have learned that from living with me...."

"Did you always get your way though or did he just make you think you did?" James asked. "He did talk you out of turning the Slytherin common room into a giant flea circus."

"Alas, he did but as you'll recall that request was partnered with another suggestion of turning the Slytherin common room into a home for wayward diarrhea-infested pigeons which was what I really wanted to do. It was a simple matter to think of something one degree worse and then let him choose...."

"You're a criminal mastermind, you know that?" James said laughing. 

Sirius flinched thinking of Azakaban. 

James felt him flinch and realized. "I didn't mean...."

"I know you didn't."

"I hate that this happened to you," James said sadly. "I want to make you forget, take it away but I don't know how."

Sirius laid there quietly for a moment. "This helps, James. Just having you back helps."

James rolled over on his side and flung his arm over Sirius. Sirius rolled over into his customary little spoon position. 

"You know this isn't necessary."

"I know. Now try to sleep."

*************************************************************************************

Sirius sat in the garden basking in the warm summer sun. The smell of alysum filled the air wafting on a gentle breeze. He knew he should be thinking about Harry and Remus but he couldn't quite manage it. The day was too beautiful and he felt something that might have been described as peace. 

Lily sat down beside him sighing in delight as the sun hit her face. 

"I didn't realize how much I missed fresh air," Sirius said. 

Lily smiled. "You almost look like you again. I guess fresh air helped."

"Fresh air was incidental. It was you and James and Mum and Dad who helped." 

Lily took Sirius' hand companionably and leaned her head against his shoulder. "I missed you, Black."

"I missed you too, Evans," Sirius said softly. He leaned his head against hers and thought that it was the most beautiful day he could remember. 

"Will you tell me more about Harry?" Lily asked. 

"Of course. What do you want to know?" 

"What's his favorite class?"

"Anything but potions."

Lily sighed.

"That's not me! That's just your buddy being a huge todger."

"That's not like him. He wouldn't be mean to children."

"Did I mention how much Harry looks like James? There have been times prior to being fully caffeinated where he's scared the complete shit out of me."

Lily decided to let it go and changed the subject. "Was he dating that girl he kissed?"

"I don't think it was very serious. She'd been dating this other bloke who was murdered and I think it was just very complicated."

"Murdered?? A student?"

"Voldemort is back, Lily. Peter killed the boy presumably under Voldemort's orders," Sirius said quietly. He felt her shudder and changed the topic to something safer. No desire to talk about everything else that happened the night Cedric Diggory was murdered. "So he doesn't have a girlfriend currently but there is this really brilliant girl who fancies him though he's been a bit of a git about it so far."

Lily considered asking more about why Peter was going around murdering students but it was a lovely day and she couldn't quite bring herself to take away the peace she saw in Sirius' eyes so she let it go. "Oh do tell."

"Her name is Ginny Weasley. She's Ron's little sister and sort of the girl you would expect her to be growing up with six older brothers. "

"Fierce?"

"Exactly. But more than that..." He thought for a moment about how best to explain. "Dumbledore really asked the Weasleys to believe that I wasn't a mass murderer just based on his word. There was no proof that I hadn't done all those awful things and the Weasleys and the rest of them all tried to give me the benefit of the doubt but you can sort of feel when people are walking on eggshells around you, you know?"

Lily nodded. "Especially people who don't know you like we do. Who know you could never do those things." She thought of Remus, still surprised that he didn't know that about Sirius as well. 

Sirius thought briefly of Remus who did believe him capable of those things but shoved the thought aside. "Ginny just took one look at me and believed me. It was sort of odd really, the instant trust between us. She told me about her first year at Hogwarts -- Voldemort had possessed this diary that she had found and convinced her to open the Chamber of Secrets and all these people had been hurt, almost died and she'd been trying to find a way to live with the consequences of these bad decisions that she made and that she thought I was as well. Trying to live with the consequences of trusting Peter the way she trusted that diary. Everyone walked on egg shells around her too."

"She sounds like an extraordinarily insightful girl."

"Harry hasn't had the easiest life, Lily, and I don't think it's going to get any easier. He needs someone who makes him stronger and I think she would.," Sirius said quietly. "And she's pretty and plays Quidditch so really all around good choice."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Yes, I see the most important considerations are all met. So why is Harry being a git?"

"I think he sees her as Ron's baby sister though no other boy at Hogwarts seems to so he should probably figure things out pretty quickly."

"I do like the idea of him marrying into a big, happy family."

"That they are. A proper family. Though whether he marries Ginny or not, Molly and Arthur consider him one of the herd. Molly made them all awful sweaters for Christmas with their initials on them. Quite funny really but Harry's a big mush for that sort of stuff." 

Sirius felt Lily's shoulders shaking just a bit and put his arms around her. "I didn't mean to make you cry..."

"I know. It's just...you know him so well and he's a stranger to me and there's this other woman knitting him sweaters and...."

"Shh. She'll never replace you, Lily. He knows who his mum is."

**************  
Fleamont's legs stuck out from under a bright red Mini Cooper that was stationed in the middle of a garage stuffed full of random pieces of muggle machinery. Motorcycles, car parts, lawn mowers, a helicopter propeller, boat motors, and a badly burned airplane wing sprawled haphazardly throughout the garage.

"Need any help?" Sirius asked as he walked in and carefully made his way through a collection of gears of various sizes that were strewn on the oil stained concrete floor. 

"Always!" Fleamont called from under the car. "Grab that gear that looks like a Cornish pixie and join me."

Sirius picked through the gears thinking none of them really looked like a Cornish pixie but dutifully chose the one most closely matching that description and slid under the car. "What are you working on?"

"It won't even start the muggle way so I'm messing about with these round things," Fleamont explained pointing. 

Sirius handed him the gear and helped him fasten it to what muggles might call the axle. "I'm not sure that's right."

"Neither am I," Fleamont admitted. "It's nice to have some company though. Your mother and James have absolutely no interest."

"There's no accounting for taste," Sirius said, unscrewing the gear with a muggle screwdriver though making it spin magically. "I've missed this. After you died...it just wasn't fun anymore."

"I hadn't thought of that," Fleamont admitted. "That you lost us and James and Lily so close together."

Sirius was quiet, remembering the shock of going from being part of a happy family to being alone in Azkaban. Even after Azkaban, he'd felt mostly alone. "It was hard," he said softly. "Suddenly being alone. It's funny because it always seemed like Walburga and Orion dying would be a blessing but you and Mum dying so soon after I'd found you...." He was having some trouble controlling the screwdriver and put it down.

Fleamont reached over and silently took his son's hand and squeezed it. "We're all back together now, son." 

Sirius nodded, trying to compose himself. Trying not to think about the years when they weren't.

"If you want to talk about it...about Azkaban and what happened after, I'll listen. No judgment, just between us," Fleamont offered. "I know you're trying not to worry us and I understand that desire to protect the people you love but I can handle the truth."

"I don't want you to think I'm crazy," Sirius said quietly. "They all thought I was and some days, they weren't wrong," he admitted.

"Honestly, I'm amazed that you're not crazy," Fleamont said. "I've been to Azkaban a few times and just a few moments in that place was enough to make me question my sanity. To survive 12 years...it's unprecedented."

"I know. Remus tried to research whether the long term effects of dementors were reversible but there was no research past two years of exposure," Sirius said. 

"Do you feel it now? Here?" Fleamont asked.

"It's always there a little bit but the intensity seems to be situational. It's much less here with all of you, not being locked up. At Grimmauld Place...."

"I can imagine that it was pretty bad with everything that happened to you there," Fleamont said. 

"Yeah...." Sirius said softly. "I...there were days...getting out of bed was too much. They were everywhere there...almost worse than Azakaban."

Fleamont bit down the urge to find a way to the before world solely for the purpose of throttling Dumbledore. "I'm sorry this happened to you, son. If I would have been alive...."  
"I'm glad you weren't alive. If you would have thought I betrayed James too...." Sirius couldn't even find words to voice the horror of that prospect.

"I would never have thought that. I know who you are, Sirius. And I know what James means to you. You would never betray him and had I been alive, I could have proved that," Fleamont explained. "You deserved a trial. An advocate. A chance at a life...."

"I can't really remember what I wanted my life to be before...before they died," Sirius admitted. "Before Azakaban."

"You'll get through this, son," Fleamont assured him. "That you survived Azakaban at all makes you the strongest person that I know and we're all going to help you. You may have been denied a life there but we're going to make sure you have a happy life here. The dementors in your head should consider this fair warning of their ultimate destruction." 

Sirius smiled a bit and picked up the screwdriver again.

*******************

Padfoot and Prongs tore through the Forbidden Forest with a herd of centaurs close on their hooves/paws. They hadn't realized that the centaurs were also in this world as no other magical creatures appeared to be. 

Double back and hide in the cave, Padfoot thought to Prongs.

Yes, Prongs thought back. 

The ruse worked though Prongs had to transform to fit into the small opening. Padfoot transformed once he got inside and they both collapsed to the ground exhausted from the sprint.

"What the hell are the centaurs doing here?" Sirius asked breathlessly.

"No idea. I guess they're more human than animal?" James mused between gasps. 

"Good to know," Sirius said sitting up and leaning against the cave wall.

James pulled himself up to sit beside Sirius. "How did you know about this place? You can't even see the opening from the ground."

"I hid here during Harry's fourth year. During the Triwizard Tournament," Sirius explained.

James looked around at the smallish, dark cave and shuddered slightly. Being Prongs was fun for a bit but he wouldn't want to spend a year living like an animal in a cave. 

"It wasn't so bad really," Sirius assured him, reading his mind as he had always been able to do, no legilimens skill required. "After the first month or so, the kids had figured out a pretty good system of sending me food from the Hogwarts kitchens so I didn't have to eat so many rats."

James cringed thinking about how bad your life had to be to think not eating so many rats to be a positive. He stuffed down the ever present anger at his best friend's plight. "Did they ever visit you here?"

"They did. Once. Harry's a bit more risk adverse than you so convincing him to make it a regular thing didn't work out," Sirius said.

"He was afraid of getting caught?" James asked surprised and a bit disappointed.

"Not that he would get caught. That I would," Sirius clarified. "I told him that would be where the fun was for you."

"You'd be wrong then," James said. "I'd have stayed away if there was even a chance that me visiting you would land you back in Azkaban."

Sirius looked surprised.

"I'd risk myself, Sirius, but I'd never risk you. Especially not with stakes that high," James said. "You really are a dolt sometimes. I blame Walburga and Orion. You don't properly value yourself."

Sirius considered this. "Maybe you overvalue me."

"Wrong again," James said. 

They sat in silence for a moment.

"You know why I agreed to have Peter as secret keeper?" James asked.

"Because you let me talk you into a really stupid idea," Sirius said.

James sighed. "First, it wasn't a stupid idea. Second, I agreed because I knew what would happen if you were the secret keeper and Voldemort caught you. You'd die before you betrayed us and I appreciate that but you'd die and I couldn't...you're my brother, Pads. I couldn't agree to something that was going to end in your death. I'd rather die myself than agree to that."

"This time you're wrong, James," Sirius said softly. "You had a family, a son. If anyone should have died, it should have been me."

"It shouldn't have been either of us," James said bitterly. "And it certainly shouldn't have ended with you in Azkaban. I am sorry about that, Pads."

"Wasn't your fault," Sirius said.

"Of course it was. I should have told someone we'd switched secret keepers," James said.

"Who would you have told? We didn't trust anyone but each other," Sirius reminded him.

"I should have told someone," James reiterated.

"You think the centaurs are gone?" Sirius asked changing the subject.

"Probably."

They transformed back to Padfoot and Prongs and galloped through the Forbidden Forest. The skies opened and poured rain on them but they didn't care. Freedom was all that mattered. 

*******************  
Sirius sat in the window seat in the parlor watching the storm clouds roll in. It was the first cloudy day since he'd arrived and he'd begun to wonder if this world was on some sort of different weather schedule from the rest of normally rainy England. Today proved that theory wrong. 

Euphemia came in and joined him on the window seat placing a tray of tea and biscuits between them. "Perfect day to stay inside with a spot of tea."

Sirius smiled at her and took a biscuit. "White chocolate chip. You remembered."

"Of course, I remembered," Euphemia said. "What kind of mother would forget her son's favorite biscuit?"

Sirius smiled at her, his mother. Maybe not the one who gave birth to him but certainly the only one who ever treated him with love. "I missed you," he said quietly. "When you died...I know I should have been there for James but...."

"You'd just found us."

Sirius nodded. 

"Then James and Lily," Euphemia said. "We never meant to leave you all alone."

"I know," Sirius said. 

"It doesn't change the fact that we did though," Euphemia said softly, taking Sirius' hand. "I am sorry for that. Even more so knowing what you went through. To have everyone think you could do those things with no one to defend you, to be on your side. It breaks my heart what happened to you."

"I thought you might believe it too," Sirius admitted. "I was sort of glad you weren't there..."

"That is absolute rubbish. We know you. We know who you truly are, Sirius."

"Remus believed it."

"Well, you believed it of him. Perhaps that friendship wasn't as strong as it appeared," Euphemia suggested matter-of-factly.

"We're better now. We forgave each other," Sirius said.

"Forgave yes but clearly, you haven't forgotten," Euphemia said.

"I guess not," Sirius admitted. "It was never quite like it was after...I guess that was me though." Hard to relate to someone with dementors in their head.

"I wish there was some potion or spell that could make it all go away," Euphemia said softly. "Watching your child hurting and not being able to fix it may be the worst feeling ever."

"You are fixing it," Sirius assured her. "Just being here is fixing it."

****************

Everyone sat in the sitting room cozy by the roaring fire while the wind blew and the rain fell outside. Lily sat on the couch engrossed in a book, her head against James' chest. Euphemia sat curled in a chair knitting needles clicking away of their own volition. Fleamont and Sirius sat at the table ensconced in yet another game of chess. 

"Bloody hell," Fleamont said finally and turned down his queen. "How long?"  
"Just a few moves," Sirius assured him. 

"What did I miss?" 

Sirius pointed to the board. "Just this."

"Do you ever lose?"

"Not since I was 8 actually. My...Orion used to be able to beat me but once he lost, we stopped playing. Regulus came close a couple times."

"Whatever happened to Regulus, dear?" Euphemia asked. 

"He was killed trying to leave the Death Eaters," Sirius said trying to be nonchalant but failing to keep the bitterness out of his voice. "Bloody idiot."

Euphemia looked sad. "It all seems so senseless. So many deaths, so young."

"He made his choice," Sirius said. "Stupid git had no idea what he was getting in to. Just did whatever he was told."

"I can't imagine it's easy to rebel when you've seen the price of rebellion," Fleamont reminded Sirius. 

"He still made the choice. We could have helped him if he didn't want to. We made that very clear," James said. 

Sirius nodded. Clear yes but he remembered how hard it was to trust that people would really help you. To even believe that the Potters could protect him. Maybe if he would have tried harder with Regulus....

"So he's elsewhere...." Euphemia said quietly, sad for the boy who died too young only to face an eternity of torture. 

"Yeah, I guess," Sirius said. "He didn't come when I died."

"Okay way too depressing," James said. "Dad, how about you end your torture and let me have a go?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Fleamont said, surrendering his seat.


	6. Light and Dark

In the weeks that followed, Sirius become much more Sirius to everyone's great relief. Prongs and Padfoot frolicked in the woods. James, Lily, and Sirius spent much time exploring anything and everything that was outside as Sirius had become a bit claustrophobic after so many years trapped inside. In fact, James and Lily and Sirius spent so much time together that Lily was beginning to wonder if she would ever see her husband alone again. Most nights, he didn't even come to bed until the sun was coming up. She loved Sirius too but enough was enough. Yes, she'd basically agreed to marry both of them but she didn't think she'd actually be held to it!

It was in this frame of mind that Lily came down to breakfast one morning to find Euphemia and Fleamont in the kitchen.

"No boys with you, dear?" Euphemia asked as she directed the magical cooking symphony.

"I doubt we'll see them before noon. They were still playing chess when I got up this morning," Fleamont said. "Sent them off to bed. James certainly wasn't going to finally manage to beat Sirius with his eyes half closed. Some sort of prodigy that one."

"Of course, you'd say that. What other excuse could you find for being crushed by a 12 year old?" Euphemia winked at Lily.

"I must admit that it made me feel better to hear that Orion was crushed by an 8 year old," Fleamont smirked.

Lily laughed. "We learned very early on that if you were going to play chess with Sirius don't ever play for money."

"That sounds like my boy," Euphemia beamed.

"At least James didn't come to bed this morning smelling like wet animal like he did last week," Lily said.

"I may never get that smell out of the couch," Euphemia moaned.

"Maybe someday he'll actually come to bed while it's still dark out," Lily said more harshly than she had intended. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean...."

"Nothing to be sorry for, dear," Euphemia smiled knowingly. "You miss James and have no idea what to do about it."

"Pretty much. I mean, I'm so happy to have Sirius back but...."

"Three people can't fit in a marital bed?"

""Yeah," Lily said dejectedly.

"If you ask me, the answer is obvious," Euphemia said as she masterfully piled pancakes on a plate floating in mid-air. "Just find him someone else's bed to climb into."

Fleamont almost spit out his tea. "Mia!"

"Euphemia!" Lily was shocked but then intrigued. "But who?"

"That I don't know...."

Lily thought for a moment. "I do! I think I do anyway. There's this woman...I run into her from time to time when I go to pick that dungwort that you use. Her name is..." She racked her brain. "..Andrea? Arabella? No, no...it's Aurora. She's quite pretty and, from what I can tell, she seems smart enough that Sirius won't be immediately bored with her...though the way he goes through women..." She stopped realizing that she had perhaps shared too much.

"That's my boy," Fleamont said and smirked at Euphemia who whacked him on the head with a spatula.

"It's okay, dear. I've been in public with him. I see how women react. I can draw my own conclusions."

Lily laughed. "I'm afraid they wouldn't be the wrong conclusions. So I'll need your help -- can you get them to meet me at the Hogwarts Lake for lunch today without letting on why?"

"Leave it to me," Euphemia smiled and quickly disappeared any traces of breakfast.

********************************************************************************************************

Aurora Solas (played by Emilia Clarke looking like Daenerys Targaryen) knelt on the ground in the Forbidden Forest picking small purple plants that appeared to have teeth. She sung a song about fairies and changelings softly to herself as she worked. It was a beautiful day but that was only part of the reason that she was here today. She'd had the dream again last night and woke up knowing exactly where she must go and so here she was. Yet again in this place.

Lily wandered into the portion of the Forbidden Forest where she'd run into Aurora in the past. What's the likelihood that she'd be here today of all days? Low, of course. She was beginning to doubt her plan when she saw the blonde haired woman kneeling on the ground and digging. She seemed to be singing to herself.

"Aurora? Hello!" Lily called. "Lovely day!"

Aurora turned to Lily, recognized her face and smiled. "Hello Lily! It's the perfect time of year to harvest moly." She pointed to her full basket. "Would you like some? Perfect for counteracting enchantments and tasty as well!"

"Thanks but I'm just here to pick up some dungwort for my mother-in-law. I can only seem to find it here," LIly fibbed. Can't spook her with the truth, she thought.

"Has she ever tried substituting the shrivelfig? A bit harder to find good ones in Scotland but their medicinal value is much higher. Are you meeting James later?"

Lily felt whiplash after the topic change, struggling to even find the segue.

"You're holding a picnic basket," Aurora said helpfully.

"Oh. Yes. I am meeting James later for lunch by the lake." The opportunity! She struck. "You should come!"

Aurora seemed surprised. "To a picnic with you and your husband?"  
Lily could see how that might be odd. "He's bringing a friend with him so more of a little picnic party," she said.

Aurora considered this for a long moment. Weighing the pros and cons. Did it feel like something she should do? Is this invitation relevant to the dream? It would be nice to have a friend though that shouldn't factor in, should it? She studied the air briefly. "Yes, I think I would like to join your little picnic party."

"Excellent!"

 

*******

James and Sirius walked down the path toward the lake.

"I can't believe Mum didn't cook breakfast. I'm starving," Sirius complained.

"You know, we can't actually starve now. Food is really just optional but yeah, I'm starving too," James admitted. "I didn't know she was so annoyed that we weren't getting up until noon."  
Sirius laughed. "She was annoyed when we did it as teenagers. I don't know why now would be different."

"I guess the novelty of you being here has worn off. That's a shame. I was enjoying the perks!" James laughed. "I guess it's back to fixing my own breakfast. Pop Tarts, here I come."

"Pop Tarts?" Sirius asked.

"This muggle food that Lily introduced me to. Tasty and you have to use the muggle toaster to make them which is always fun." James gestured toward the lake. "There's Lily. Who's that with her?"

Lily stood beside a beautiful woman with long almost white blonde hair.

"Dunno."

They continued walking toward the women when Sirius suddenly stopped. "She's beautiful," he murmured reverently.

"Pads, you okay?" James asked walking back to his friend. "What's up?"

"Who is that?" Sirius asked dazed.

"I just asked you that so clearly, I don't know. What's wrong with you? Snap out of it!"

Sirius shook his head. Trying to snap out of it. Trying to make his feet obey his brain again. They walked to where the women were standing.

"Even more beautiful up close," Sirius whispered.

James and Sirius walked the last few feet and stopped in front of Lily and Aurora.

Sirius knew he should say something. Ideally, something charming. Which he was normally really good at. Even after Azkaban, this skill had come back to him. Say something charming. Silence. Okay say something. Say anything. Why am I not saying anything???? He looked at James pointedly. Silencing spell???? Now????

James shook his head, obviously bewildered by the situation as well.

Lily broke the silence before it grew any more awkward. "This is my friend, Aurora Solas. Aurora, this is my husband, James, and our best friend, Sirius Black."

Aurora felt herself inexplicably drawn to Sirius as if he were an irresistible force. Her heart was beating far too fast, her palms were sweaty. She was sure that if she looked directly at him, she would lose control of her actions. She'd vaguely heard Lily introduce her to...him...caught his name. Sirius Black. She remembered him. From Hogwarts. From the front page of the Daily Prophet. Some ridiculous allegations that the Quibbler certainly never reprinted.

"It's lovely to meet you, Aurora," James offered her his hand.

Aurora felt like someone may be talking to her. She realized that Lily's husband was holding out his hand to her. She reached out and shook it hoping he didn't notice her sweaty palms.

James shot a suspicious look at Lily and then turned to Sirius who still seemed to be struggling with a silencio spell of unknown origin. "Sirius?" He partnered the word with a sharp jab to the ribs which seemed to help.

"Hi. I'm Sirius...." he started lamely. Hold out your hand, idiot. The hand mostly cooperated and reached out to Aurora.

Aurora stared at Sirius' hand for a second. She wanted to touch it but didn't trust herself at this particular moment in time. You have to do something! She took his hand. She felt an electric shock go up her arm when she touched him.

Sirius held her hand for the appropriate amount of handshake time, so soft, but then his hand didn't want to let go. Let go hand! Panic set in and was worsened when he looked into her eyes and drowned there for a moment. What the hell was going on????? He was considering turning and fleeing when he noticed that her hand was not letting go of his hand either. Had she spoken at all? Maybe the silencio spell had gotten her too. Oh bollocks. Now he couldn't stop looking at her. Why was his body in open rebellion now of all times?

Aurora gazed at Sirius lost in his gray eyes. They look like storm clouds. I like storm clouds though normally, I can look away from them. Not these storm clouds. He's still holding my hand or maybe I'm still holding his? He must think I'm a freak but his hand is so warm and it really feels like I shouldn't let it go.

James and Lily looked awkwardly at each other. "Um. So Lily, it looks like you brought a picnic?" James tried.

"I did!" Lily said with relief.

"Thank Merlin, I'm famished!" James and Lily sat down on the blanket and started pilfering through the picnic basket but then looked up when they realized no one else sat. James mouthed "what the bloody hell did you do?" to Lily.

Lily shook her head. Genuinely innocent...mostly innocent.

James hopped back up and stood between Sirius and Aurora blocking the eye contract and forcing their hands apart, breaking the spell for the moment at least. "We're eating now. Why don't you both sit down?"

Sirius and Aurora sat down obediently. Their legs brushed and they looked at each other like it was an electrical shock. The eye contact was back, the food forgotten.

I should really stop staring at her, Sirius thought. This can't be considered acceptable behavior. She's so beautiful but it's more than that....

I should really stop staring at him, Aurora thought. I wish I was still touching him. I wonder what it would feel like to kiss him. Not helpful, she admonished herself.

James looked at Lily in exasperation and mouthed "You did something!"

Lily shook her head. "All I did was invite a pretty, smart friend to lunch," she hissed. "Was it a set up? Yes! But I did not do..." she gestured to Sirius and Aurora who had found each other's hands again "...THIS."

Sirius could hear James and Lily though they sounded very far away. Only Aurora seemed to be sitting in his vicinity. He found his voice finally. "We can hear you." He dragged his eyes away from Aurora and looked at Lily. "You did something."

"I didn't!" Lily stood up and stormed off.

James sighed and followed her.

Aurora found her voice. "Do you think it's a spell? This?" She wasn't sure what she wanted the answer to be though "spell" would explain a lot.

"I don't know," Sirius said softly, intwining his fingers with hers. He tried to remember to breathe but she was so close to him and it was causing him physical pain and not in the place where it normally would. The pain felt like it was in his heart and then there was the nausea and the spinning. Really, he felt quite drunk only not drunk. Something else. Something wonderful and it was all about this woman in front of him who he couldn't pry his eyes away from. Aurora. He thought she looked like pure light, felt like pure light, shining into all the dark places in his soul. He gently touched his forehead to hers and felt her creep closer to him, felt all the physical symptoms of his ailment increase tenfold.

"I think maybe..."Aurora began "...I think...normally, I'm not...." Pull it together! She moved closer to him, the smell of him flooded her senses making her yearn to touch him, to kiss him, to.... STOP.

"Me neither," Sirius said softly his lips inches from hers exercising every ounce of restraint he had in him not to close the gap between their lips. She smelled like...whatever his amorentia was, he was sure it smelled like her. Maybe Lily did this but he just couldn't imagine that she'd mess around with a love potion.

Why could she not think straight? How could she be expected to think straight with his lips so close to hers? She'd been with other men, married one in fact but this. She was not "this girl" that fell head over heels for the first albeit absolutely beautiful man who paid attention to her but this man...she felt him already in her soul and yet she couldn't seem to form a complete sentence in front of him. She'd been making a point and now she couldn't even remember what it was. Oh yes. That point. Probably not a good one but she was out of rational ideas. She was beginning to think that this belonged in the category of "not rational" but maybe if...if the unknown becomes known then it can be better controlled.... "I think maybe if I...this might help...just...just hold still...."

Sirius looked at her questioningly but held still despite every instinct screaming at him to touch her, kiss her, lay her down on the grass....

Aurora leaned over and kissed Sirius on the lips and his head exploded or was that his heart? He kissed her back, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her closer. She was happy to be pulled closer, snuggled against him, kissed him harder, her hands in his hair, on his chest, under his shirt....

"Sirius!!!!!!" Lily raged as she walked back to them. "James, deal with this!!"

Sirius and Aurora looked up at Lily in confusion. Surprised to learn they weren't the only two people left on the planet.

James looked embarrassed but reached down, grabbed Sirius' arm and apparated them both a hundred yards away for a private conversation.

Sirius looked shell shocked, head spinning, lips burning, who was she? Need her. What the hell is going on?

"Lily would like you to know that she did not arrange this whole thing solely for you to, and I quote, 'get your rocks off like the hundreds of other girls you've fucked and forgotten'."

"Hundreds seems like a bit of an exaggeration."

"I'm not sure you've found the point yet."

"The point is ridiculous. She kissed ME. "

"They always kiss you, mate. You're like some sort of male veela. It's not a defense."

"It's not like that with her! It's..." Sirius had a sudden revelation. "What did it feel like? When you fell in love with Lily?"

"WHAT???" James realized. "Oh..."

"Because I feel like I may vomit and the world is spinning and it's dark over here and it's light where she is and...." Sirius stopped, realizing that he was babbling like an idiot. "I'm not going to fuck her and forget her." He reconsidered his position. "I'm not going to forget her."

James softened, smiled, put his arm around Sirius' shoulders and led him back toward Aurora. "You're in for quite a ride, my friend. I'll do what I can with Lily."

They returned to the women and Sirius sat back down beside Aurora. Does she look relieved? Could she be feeling this too? Sirius cautiously reached out for her hand and she gave it to him, stroking his hand, sending shivers down his spine. He looked into her crystal blue eyes. "I'm back," he said lamely. Maybe I should stop talking altogether.

"I know." Aurora smiled at Sirius. That look on his face. Does he feel this? It must be a spell. Lily must have done this but....

Aurora's smile nearly did Sirius in. How could he still exist on the planet and not be kissing her? It was as impossible as existing without breathing.

James held out his hand to Lily. "We're going for a walk."

"What? I don't think that's a good...."

"Trust me." James hauled Lily to her feet and they walked away. He turned back. "Try talking to each other instead of just staring." He winked and turned back to his wife.

"That was embarrassing," Sirius murmured rubbing his thumb over the palm of her hand across the life line, the love line.

"Why are you embarrassed? I was the one he caught staring!"

"You were? I thought it was me." Sirius laughed nervously. "I really do normally not sound like an idiot. Good Merlin, was that even proper English?"

Aurora laughed, relaxing a bit. "I thought it was just me."

"It's definitely not just you," Sirius smiled at her. "I'm having trouble breathing and the world is spinning and now I can't seem to stop talking...."

Aurora smiled. "Do you reckon it's a spell or a love potion?"

"Actually...no. Lily's not...she wouldn't do that. No doubt this is a set up but I think that's where she would stop."

"So this is...."

"Us."

"Oh." Aurora studied him for a moment trying not to get lost in those gray eyes that reminded her of gathering storm clouds one minute and warm gray wool the next but instead started thinking about how good his lips felt on hers.... "I'm going to kiss you again and then I think I can muster a few more minutes of moderately intelligent conversation."

"You are definitely welcome to kiss me whenever you'd like but I should warn you that you kissing me pretty much ends any hope of me participating in that intelligent conversation."

Aurora smiled, considering this. "I believe it's worth the risk."

Sirius smiled and waited to be kissed. Aurora leaned over and kissed him. He opened his mouth and felt her tongue inside his mouth, felt every inch of his body longing for more. Can't let this go on for much longer, in public, oh my god, need her..... Aurora pushed him onto his back crawling on top of him, kissing him, touching him. He rolled them over so he was on top, still kissing, grinding, clothes in the way, instincts taking over. Hold on, not for fucking and forgetting, not for fucking and forgetting. With great effort, Sirius rolled off her and propped himself up on his elbow beside her. Her confused look and swollen lips almost destroyed his resolve. "So you said something about intelligent conversation?"

Aurora blinked at him trying to get her bearings, trying to deal with the longing to have him inside her immediately. She pulled it together and rolled onto her side to face him. "Yes well it's possible that my 'kissing you will lead to intelligent conversation' theory was a bit faulty."

Sirius laughed. "Well, we're going to have to try because Lily will turn me into a grindylow if we continue down the path we were just on." Think about anything but the curve of her breast visible from the buttons that were undone, the feel of her lips against my neck, the feel of her body under mine....

"Is that what that was about with James before?" Aurora laughed. "I kissed you!"

"That's what I told him. That I was the innocent party!" Impure thoughts aside....

"I can't believe he didn't believe you. Just because you shagged your way through the Ravenclaw sixth years in a week.," Aurora smirked at Sirius. She wasn't sure why she brought it up. Perhaps the one rational bit of her brain trying to vet this situation before it got anymore out of control. Too late said the rest of her as she replayed the memory of his lips on her skin.....

Sirius looked horrified. "How do you know that?"

"I was in Ravenclaw."

"I...you...I..." Sirius sputtered.

Aurora laughed. "No, not I. I was a lowly third year at the time but the whole thing caused quite a disturbance in the Ravenclaw common room. You would think Ravenclaws would be rational about such things but those girls were furious with each other."

Sirius looked sheepish. "That hadn't occurred to me." This can't be happening.

"I assume some sort of dare or bet was involved."

"James dared me but there was betting action as well," Sirius admitted a bit embarrassed.

"Did you win?"

"I really hate this conversation," Sirius said miserably. "We were stupid kids. Really stupid kids. And I really like you and this is what we're talking about and...."

Aurora leaned over and kissed him gently, carefully, chastely. "If I cared, I wouldn't have kissed you. I assume you're not that way now."

"Definitely not." Azkaban takes that out of a man.

Aurora saw the cloud flit over his eyes. "Azkaban?"

Sirius looked at her, startled by her perception. Legilimens? "How did you know?"

"I died after you were sent there. I never understood how they got it so wrong. Obviously, you'd never betray James. I remember you both from school. Anyone who knew you both should have known that and then not even a trial? Made me wonder if the goodies were really any better than the baddies."

"You believed I was innocent?" Sirius whispered,stunned into near silence. "No one believed that. Not even Remus believed it."

Aurora gently stroked Sirius' face, his perfect jawline. "They didn't see you clearly then. I can see."

"I need to be kissed again," Sirius said quietly overwhelmed with feelings. Not just desire. He felt like she could see inside his soul and wasn't terrified by what she saw there.

Aurora smiled. "Of course." She leaned over and kissed him, trying to keep it chaste. She failed and found herself laying on top of him fumbling with the buttons of his shirt. She felt his hands on her bare thighs, roaming higher. She moaned and kissed him harder. Hands and lips everywhere.

***************************************  
Lily and James walked along the trail surrounding the loch hand in hand. Lily wanted to enjoy having her husband to herself finally but a part of her brain was still churning over Sirius and Aurora. She should have realized that things would play out the way they always did. Women found Sirius irresistible. Even women who normally had better sense. She thought of her roommates at Hogwarts all of whom had slept with Sirius at some point despite the fact that they weren't particularly...well...easy. "We should head back."

"They're fine. Can't we just enjoy the afternoon?" James asked.

"You know what they're doing," LIly said. "You know how he is."

"I know how he was. Now, I don't really know and neither do you," James said and pulled his wife to a stop. "He's changed in a lot of ways, Lily, which after everything he's been through is to be expected. I think he's not just looking at her as a fling."

"And your evidence?" Lily asked.

"The fact that I know him better than anyone and she's different. Just have some faith."

Lily sighed. "What if you're wrong?"

"What if I'm right and this is the start of something that will be really wonderful for him?"

"Okay. I concede. For now," Lily said and they continued their walk along the loch.

*********************************************************

Sirius felt his will power fading fast and tried to take action, tried to rein in his lips, his hands, other things. "If Lily catches us, I'm blaming you."

Aurora laughed and kissed him lightly trying to keep her hands from straying where they had been straying. "Maybe I should get off you...." She tried to roll off him but he held her.

"I'd rather you didn't but we've really found the outer limits of my limited self control so it's probably better that you do."

They rolled back over to their sides. Touching each other's face, arms, hair, both trying to keep their exploring fingers in safe zones.

Something occurred to Aurora and she voiced it. "Do you think you'll lose interest if we have sex?"

Sirius was surprised by her directness and by how wrong she was. "That's what Lily's afraid of."

"What are you afraid of?"Aurora asked softly, slowly tracing Sirius' fingertips.

Sirius thought for a moment. Somehow the truth seemed like the only thing he was capable of telling this woman. "I'm afraid that if we have sex, I'll drown in what I'm feeling right now," he said quietly. "I've never felt like this before and it's a bit frightening."

"Stark honesty earns you another kiss." Aurora kissed Sirius gently. "You're not the only one drowning, you know. I was married...before...but it never felt like this."

Should her words have caused him physical pain? Because they did. "Married?"

"Xenophilius was more of a friend than a lover but I married him and we had a daughter." Aurora looked wistful for a moment thinking of the child she left behind. "That's the worst part about this place. Missing the one we left behind."

"Xenophilius Lovegood is your...husband?" Sirius asked incredulously. Being upset over her having a husband had given way to shock over who the husband was. The editor of the Quibbler was quite well known to be absolutely an odd duck.

"In the before world, yes. Not here," Aurora added quickly. And not like this, like you. Why'd she bring him up? Idiot.

"Is your daughter's name Luna?" Sirius asked putting the pieces together.

"Yes. How did you know?"

"She's friends with my godson, Harry."

Aurora looked surprised. "The Boy Who Lived"?

Sirius laughed. "I believe he prefers 'Harry' but yeah, I suppose. They became friends at the beginning of this school year. He saw something a bit harrowing and Luna helped him get through it." He paused thinking. "I think she was there when I died."

Aurora looked stunned. "Didn't you die in Azkaban?"

"No, I escaped that place. The perks of being an unregistered animagus."

Aurora looked impressed. "We hadn't considered that possibility though now I'm glad we didn't. It may have encouraged the guards to keep a closer eye on you."

Sirius doubted that a theory espoused in the Quibbler would have had any impact beyond laughter but kept that to himself.

"Why did you become an animagus?" Aurora asked. "That's very difficult and very dangerous magic."

"To help a friend...you remember Remus Lupin?"

"Of course. He was kind to me once. I was hopelessly lost my first year and he helped me. Didn't make me feel stupid at all which he very well could have considering it was March and I was still getting lost."

"That sounds like Remus," Sirius said smiling. "He is kinder than James and I deserve which is why we went to such extreme measures to help him."

"How did becoming an animagus help him?" Aurora asked trying to puzzle it out. She didn't know a lot about Remus Lupin beyond his kindness to her and the fact that he was sick a lot. Particularly at full moons...animals would be able to stay with him when human boys could not. "Is he a werewolf?"  
Sirius stared at her dumbfounded. "That took me and James a bloody year to work out and we were living with him!"

"Well, you were children and we didn't have the chapter on werewolves until fifth year though it is a bit obvious. He was always sick around the full moon," Aurora said. "And if you were animagi, you could stay with him when he transformed." She remembered the details of what that transformation entailed. "He was going through all that and could still be kind to me. That does sound like someone worth risking your life for."

"He is certainly worth that," Sirius said, missing Remus. With his family back, he'd given precious little thought to Harry and Remus and now felt horrible about it.

"It's this place," Aurora said. "It soothes the mind so we don't fret so much about those we left behind. So how did you die?"

Sirius tried to digest both her uncanny ability to read his mind and also the rapid change in topics. "I died at the Ministry in the prophecy room rescuing Harry and Luna and some other kids from Death Eaters. "

"What was my daughter doing there? With Death Eaters?" Aurora asked alarmed.

"Harry sees what Voldemort sees and Voldemort finally realized and used the connection to trick him and...well it's a kind of a long story but she was there. They came to rescue me but I wasn't really there but then we rescued them. Though Luna was holding her own against some pretty decent duelers...." Sirius stopped, realizing that Aurora looked horror stricken. "She was fine. Perfectly fine. Not a blond hair harmed, I promise."

Aurora felt the tears coming. It had been 7 years since she'd even heard someone say Luna's name and suddenly 7 years of missing her bubbled to the surface.

"Don't cry. She was fine. I swear." Sirius gathered the weeping Aurora into his arms stroking her hair, letting her cry into his chest. "She was fine." He continued stroking her hair, rubbing her back until she quieted.

Aurora lifted her head to look at him. "Please tell me what you know about her. Anything."

Sirius smiled. "Of course." He shifted onto his back and shifted her head onto his chest, wrapping his arms around her, comforting her, protecting her. He felt like he could see their future and strangely their past. Like he had known her for the entire expanse of time itself.

************************************************************************************************************

James and Lily returned from their walk hand in hand. Lily spied Sirius and Aurora laying on top of each other and looked questioningly at James.

"Sirius is a cuddler. I don't know what you want me to say."

Lily bit back a smile and replaced it with a glare.

"They're fine. They're clothed. Besides, I really think he's falling for her. Have you ever seen him speechless?" James asked.

"No, though I count the number of times that I wished he was speechless in the millions."

James laughed loudly and then purposely tripped over the picnic basket for good measure to announce their arrival.

Sirius sat up pulling Aurora with him. "We're clothed, Lily! I swear!"

"He's been a perfect gentleman," Aurora assured them. "No reason to turn him into a grindylow."

Lily and James sat down beside them. "You can't blame me for being concerned. You have no idea how many fights you caused in my dorm room with your...shenanigans."

"Shenanigans?" Sirius laughed. "Is that what the kids are calling it these days?"

Aurora laughed. "He caused quite an uproar in the Ravenclaw dorms as well."

"That one may have been my fault," James admitted sheepishly.

"So I've heard," Aurora laughed. "I am curious though. Why Ravenclaw?"

"Well, Gryffindor was out because this one was in love with Lily and would have killed me for shagging her," Sirius pointed at James. "And...."

"As if I ever would have!" Lily spat indignantly.

"Whatever you want to believe, darling." Sirius winked at her.

Lily rolled her eyes. "You wish."

"Anyway, so Gryffindor was out and Slytherin...too many cousins there and while it is customary in my family to marry your cousins, that definitely wasn't a tradition I was going to uphold!"

"Your cousins are a bit of alright if you like your girls smoking hot and absolutely terrifying," James said.

"Gross," Sirius said. "And I'm pretty sure Bella kills her suitors after mating with them. I can only assume Rodolphos is a vampire."

"So definitely no Slytherin," Aurora said. "What was wrong with Hufflepuff?"

"Remus wouldn't take the action on the Hufflepuff girls," supplied James.

"Why not?" Lily asked.

"Everyone knows Hufflepuff girls are easy," Sirius explained.

James nodded in agreement.

Lily and Aurora both looked aghast but they were ignored and James continued, "So that left Ravenclaw. Remus thought at least one of those girls would have more sense but...."

"He was wrong," Sirius started to smile at the memory but thought better of it. Why won't this conversation end?

Lily shook her head, exasperated with them. "Please just tell me that Aurora wasn't one of them. I'd hate to have set you up with someone you've already conquested though I could see where it could easily happen."

"First, ouch. Second, I don't think conquested is a word. Didn't your muggle school teach you proper English?" Sirius inquired, swiftly changing the subject.

"Please excuse me for not having rich kid tutors," Lily snarled defensively.

"Hey, don't yell at me. I'm down with the working class," Sirius laughed easily now that the subject had been changed. "So what about you, Aurora? Muggle school or rich kid tutors? You're muggle born, right?"

"Neither actually," Aurora said a bit nervous. She knew she had to tell Sirius the truth. Wanted to tell him the truth. A truth she'd never told anyone but she wanted him to truly know her. "I...well...I guess we had a school but it wasn't a muggle school. I'm not muggle born. I'm..a Druid."

All three looked shocked.

"I thought Druids were extinct. I distinctly remember reading that in "A History of Magic", Lily said.

" Yeah, that book's wrong and ridiculously boring for such an interesting subject though not really the point." Aurora found herself babbling nervously and took a breath. "Anyway, so Druids not extinct just very secretive and not very fond of non-Druids. Telling Wizards about Druids is sort of the same taboo as Wizards telling Muggles about magic."

Sirius looked at her with utter fascination. Smart, beautiful AND a fascinating mystery. He really must think of an appropriate thank you gift for Lily. Perhaps a small island of her own. Lilytopia, he would call it. "So how did you end up at Hogwarts if Druids are secretive and hate non-Druids?"

"Hate is a bit strong. More like monolithic distrust and an inflated sense of superiority."

"Sounds like my parents talking about Muggles. If only they would have known that there was a group who felt that way about them," Sirius laughed. "So how did you end up at Hogwarts?" And how did I not notice you then....

"Dumbledore knew about us and would stop by every once in awhile. Try to convince us to return to the magical world. He got nowhere with any of us except...he came shortly after I turned 11 and he was turned down as he always was but I ran after him and said I wanted to go. My mother was furious. Everyone was furious but I was adamant and I went and...and it was made clear that I wasn't welcome back there so...."

Sirius instinctively hugged Aurora tightly, burying his face in her hair, knowing that pain.

Aurora tensed for a moment in surprise and then accepted his comfort.

"You two have a lot in common," James said quietly.

Aurora looked at Sirius questioningly.

"My parents disowned me too. Not for going to Hogwarts but ultimately for getting sorted into the wrong house, having the wrong values, not hating the right people. By the time it happened, I hated them but it still hurt," Sirius explained.

"Where did you go? I don't remember you staying at Hogwarts during breaks like I did," Aurora asked. Breaks would have been a lot more fun.

"No, I had the great fortune of being best mates with someone who had the world's best parents and they basically adopted me," Sirius said thinking of Euphemia and Fleamont with love.

"Mum always had a soft spot for stray dogs," James smirked and then ducked as the picnic basket came flying at his head.

"So this Druid thing...is fascinating," Sirius said, his arm still around Aurora. He couldn't not be touching her. "Is it different than our magic? Can you do different things that we can? Can you...."

"Here we go. A puzzle to be solved," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Pads, let it go. She'll tell you if she wants to tell you. Don't bug her to death with it. Or us," James pled.

"I don't do that!"

James and Lily snorted simultaneously.

Sirius looked insulted.

Aurora laughed. "It's okay. It's mostly the same but there are parts that you've lost that we haven't. The parts that ground our magic to the elements, to the earth, to the sky, to the water and the fire. I would guess it's why your family uses astronomical names for their children even if they don't know that's why they do it."

Sirius looked confused. " We used to be Druid?"  
"Everyone used to be Druid in some fashion but yes, I think the Blacks used to be quite Druid before they took a different...darker...path," Aurora explained carefully.

"Darker path sounds right," James said.

"Doesn't get much darker," Sirius muttered.

"Not you though. You're not like them. There's light in you. I can see it, " Aurora said softly. "Right here." She gently touched the air by his head.

"You can see...."

"Magic. That's what you've lost," Aurora said sad for them. "It's quite beautiful."

"So no one at Hogwarts knew you were Druid?" Lily asked.

"Just Dumbledore," Aurora said. "I even had to change my name."

"Aurora isn't your real name?" Sirius asked surprised. It felt like her name. Belonged to her.

"Aurora is my real name. When I came...here...it felt silly to use the fake one. In the before world, my name was Pandora. I always liked that story and since I was keeping an enormous secret, it seemed appropriate."

"It doesn't suit you," Sirius said. "Aurora feels...right." He pulled her closer to him. You feel right, he thought resting his head against her head, his arms wrapped around her.

James gave Lily an "I told you so" look.

Lily sighed realizing she may have misjudged the situation.


	7. California Sun

As the sun set on Loch Morar, a chilly breeze blew up. Sirius felt Aurora shiver and hugged her closer giving her what body heat he had to spare.

"It's getting cold. We should go," suggested Lily.

Sirius looked devastated to let go of the perfect afternoon. "Can we go somewhere else? Somewhere warmer and with more daylight?"

"Where did you have in mind?" James asked.

"A surprise!" Sirius exclaimed and hopped up pulling Aurora with him. He kept one arm around Aurora and offered the other hand to James and Lily. They took it and apparated to the most beautiful, deserted beach any of them had ever seen.

"Where are we?" asked Lily.

"Big Sur, California. I saw it in a muggle travel magazine once and it looked beautiful," said Sirius.

"It is," breathed James. "Good choice."

Aurora knelt down on the sand and put her hands on it. Listening.

Sirius eyed her curiously. "Are you okay?"  
"Can't you feel it? This place is vibrating with magic," Aurora exclaimed. "Come feel it!" She took Sirius' hand and pulled him down to the sand.

Sirius touched the sand but felt nothing but sand. He shook his head. "It feels good. Warm. Welcoming. But I don't feel anything else...."

Aurora considered him. "I think you will sometime," she predicted.

Sirius pulled Aurora up and into him. "Not today, I'm afraid...though I do feel something...." He kissed her slowly, thoroughly, until she was breathless and then yelled "Ocean!" and grabbed James on the run, clothes flying as he ran.

Aurora watched, trying to catch her breath.

James spelled off his own clothes and followed Sirius into the surf. "Come on! Don't be chickens!"

"I've married a child," sighed Lily.

Aurora laughed. "I'm pretty sure I'm falling for the other one."

Lily smiled. "There's a lot more to them than their childish antics and sometimes even those are amusing though if you tell either of them I said that I will categorically deny it."

Aurora laughed. "I assume we're joining them. That there's some sort of Gryffindor bravery thing going on here and that I can either join or sit on the beach by myself like a prude."

Lily started pulling off her blouse. "I'm afraid so though I do feel bad sanctioning peer pressure." She finished taking off her clothes, folded them neatly on a hastily conjured beach blanket and ran toward the water.

Aurora watched them splashing around for a moment then saw Sirius looking at her. She noticed the water glistening off his toned body, his long, wet hair hanging down his back, reminding her a bit of a Viking, and was surprised to find that she'd already spelled her clothes off. When did that happen? At the very least, she would walk with some dignity to the water's edge.

Sirius ran out to meet Aurora, picked her up and ran with her into the water, and dunked them both into the cool, salty surf. She came up spluttering.

"What if I couldn't swim?"

Sirius looked concerned. "I hadn't thought of that. Can you?"

"Well, yes, but you didn't know that."

"I would have saved you...." Truly noticing her naked body for the first time, he felt himself grow hard and dragged them into deeper water. This was going to be a challenge.....

Aurora put her arms around Sirius' neck and her legs around him, kissing him, rubbing against him. Needing him. "Sirius?" She stared at Sirius with equal lust in her eyes willing him to understand that James and Lily really needed to go for another walk.

Sirius looked over at James and Lily who seemed pretty occupied with each other's lips at the moment. Normally, he didn't really care that much if he had an audience but Aurora was different.

"What about that cove?" Aurora gently moved his head to where she was looking.

"You're sure?"

Aurora kissed him again, guiding him inside of her. "It's really a matter of location, love," Aurora breathed in his ear.

Sirius moaned and decided that no mere human could continue to resist this onslaught. He apparated them both to the cove barely managing to lay her down on the beach before thrusting into her. She moaned and writhed against him, his lips and fingers were everywhere giving her pleasure until she could bear no more and exploded with it. He felt her nails digging in to his back as she pushed him in deeper, felt his own shuddering orgasm as he moaned in pleasure in her ear and relaxed on top of her.

Sirius felt his head spinning, his heart thumping in his chest. This is the moment when he would normally gather his strength and start thinking of reasons to leave but Aurora... All he wanted to do was stay here wrapped in her arms forever. As his brain slowly started functioning again, he realized he was probably crushing her. He rolled off her and pulled her on top of him pulling her head down to kiss her lightly on her perfect swollen lips. They stared at each other speechless. He should say something but his brain and his mouth were out on strike again. Why did she have this effect on him? Say something! "I love you." Anything but that. Say anything but that. He eyed her fearfully waiting for the fallout.

Aurora looked at Sirius surprised but not upset by his declaration. She rolled off him and turned to face him her head propped in her hand. "Do you believe in fate? In prophecy?"

Sirius looked relieved at the change in topic and rolled onto his side to face her. "Like divination? I would say no but my best friends died because of a prophecy which may still play out. I guess I don't really know."

"Druids believe. In sight. In dreams. It's one more thing that wizards lost when they left us."

Sirius wondered where she was going with this.

"Ever since I was a little girl, I've dreamed about the part of the Forbidden Forest where Lily found me this morning. Over and over, I've had this dream. I didn't even know where the forest was until I went to Hogwarts and stumbled upon it. I've been going there periodically ever since waiting for whatever the dream foretold. Today when I saw you, I knew and I think you know too even if you're not sure you believe."

"I'm becoming more convinced." He gently traced her face with his fingers. Skin so soft as he traced down her jaw to her throat and lower.... Just as he was about to lose focus on the conversation, his brain made a connection. "Where in the Forbidden Forest?"

"By the cave with...."

"In the mountain?"

"Yes! You know it?"

"I lived in that cave for almost a year. A couple years ago."

"I was dead by then."

Sirius stared at her sadly. "A coincidence then."

"There are no coincidences, my love. Just time that hasn't met up yet."

"And now it has?"

"Now it has...which is why you don't need to feel awkward about saying "I love you" because it is already written. Already seen." She leaned over and kissed him softly on the lips. "And I love you too."

Sirius smiled and pulled her back on top of him kissing her, his hands in her hair, on her skin. He felt her guiding him back inside her and moaned as she rode him, as she took her own pleasure. He rolled her over and made love to her slowly this time, kissing every inch until she was spent and he could take no more. He came inside her, kissing her deeply, his fingers wrapped in her hair, anything to be a part of her. There would be no forgetting this one.

*****************************************************************************************

On the beach by a campfire, Lily lay back in James' arms enjoying the sunset, the feel of James' chest, the afterglow of making love in the ocean. She was still a bit concerned with the Sirius and Aurora situation. What the hell had happened there? She knew SHE didn't spell them. Whatever it was, however long it lasted, at least she got James back for an afternoon. A quite lovely afternoon....

James bent down, kissing Lily's earlobe, smiling as she moaned in pleasure. "Stop thinking." He kissed down her throat, his hand on her breast, the other hand on her stomach, lower, massaging. Lily writhed against him.

Lily turned around, sitting in James' lap, facing him. "Make me." She guided him inside her and he moaned in pleasure. She kissed him deeply, riding him, his fingers massaging until he could feel her shudder against him. He laid her down in the sand, thrusting into her until he came and collapsed on top of her.

Lily wrapped her arms around his back, holding him against her. Loving the feel of him on top of her, his weight. "I've really missed you."

"Me too," James whispered into her ear. He rolled off her and repositioned them so that she was laying back against him again, a blanket covering them. "Brilliant idea setting Sirius up with someone."

"Your mom's idea actually," Lily confessed. "All I did was find a girl I thought he might like."

"My mom?" James asked incredulous.

"I believe her exact words were "find Sirius someone else's bed to climb into"."

"I am both shocked and disturbed," James said. "Though it worked."

"Maybe too well," Lily said. "Or at least too quickly."

"I think he may surprise you this time," James said. "I think he really likes her. I've never seen him act this way before. He asked me how it felt when I fell in love with you."

Lily digested this. "I guess it's my turn to be shocked," she said. "So what did it feel like when you fell in love with me?"  
"Well, I was 11 so...."

"You didn't fall in love with me then," Lily insisted.

"I did," James said quietly. "I may not have known what 'in love' meant then but there was never any other girl for me. Ask Sirius. He had to listen to it for 6 long years while you pretended to hate me."

"I wasn't always pretending, James," Lily said. "You could be pretty obnoxious."

"I know. I didn't know what to say to you, how to talk to you, so every time I opened my mouth, it came out wrong. Really, I'm surprised we ever ended up together."

"You may owe Sirius a little bit for that," Lily admitted.

"I'm almost afraid to ask why," James said.

"It started...I guess it was fourth year. You know Petunia would send me those horrible letters saying how much she hated me?"

"I remember," James said. "I can't believe Dumbledore gave our son to that woman."

"I know. Anyway, I was having trouble sleeping one night after a particularly awful one so I went down to the common room to read and Sirius was down there. It was shortly after Christmas break I remember because Petunia's letter centered around how I'd ruined Christmas and how she would prefer if I just stayed at Hogwarts from now on. I had the letter with me and instead of reading my book, I was just rereading the letter over and over. I guess Sirius recognized the symptoms because he sat down beside me and asked to see it. I don't even know why I gave it to him. I hated him about as much as I hated you in those days. But I did and he read it and then he tossed it in the fire and said, "It's rubbish and you can't obsess over it."

"Sirius, king of obsessing over horrible letters from home, told you not to obsess over it?" James asked incredulously.

"I think it was more 'do as I say, not as I do' advice. Anyway, we talked for awhile about what it was like to have family members who hate you. Something that very few people understand really. And it helped to talk about it, to have someone who got it, you know?"

"I don't know but I guess that's the point," James said softly. "So did these little all night gab sessions happen frequently? Because he never mentioned it to me. I sort of assumed he was off shagging some bird in some cupboard somewhere when he would vanish in the middle of the night."

"Some nights he probably was but some nights, we would just stay up all night talking and playing chess," Lily said.

"Did you ever win?"

"Of course not. He's some sort of idiot savant."

James laughed a bit. "So how did this make you decide to go out with me?"

"I started seeing you through his eyes. Instead of the obnoxious prat always pranking innocent people, bullying Severus, I saw an amazing friend who would do anything for the people he loved."

"How did I never know any of this?" James asked.

"Because it really wasn't any of your business," Lily said. "It was private between us. Really, I loved him long before I loved you which is why I put up with the last few months. Because he needed you but I need you too."

"I need both of you. Love both of you. But I get it, I do. And I think you may have solved the problem anyway. There's something about the way he is with her."

"Are you sure because you know what they're doing in the cove...." Lily said skeptically.

"I know but I really think she's different. It won't be a one time thing. In fact, I hope you made sure WE would like her because I'm pretty sure we just became a foursome."

"If she makes him happy, loves him the way he deserves to be loved, then I'll love her," Lily said.

"Looks like they've returned," James said. "Oi mate," he said seeing Sirius and Aurora walking toward them, huddled together in a blanket. "We thought you'd got lost with your notoriously bad sense of direction."

"That happened once!" Sirius was indignant. "After an entire bottle of Firewhiskey!" He sat down pulling Aurora down between his legs, wrapping the blanket around them, wrapping his arms around her, nuzzling her neck, making her laugh. He loved her laugh. He was saying something. What was it?

"I never understood how the two of you managed to acquire alcohol so easily. Did you have a still set up in the dungeons?" Lily asked.

James and Sirius looked at each other. "Why didn't we think of that????" Sirius asked James.

"Much better idea than how we did it. At least much more reliable."

"How did you do it then?" Aurora asked.

Sirius looked uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation. "It's not that interesting....."

James failed to read the situation and plowed on. "You remember Rosmerta, the bar maid at the Three Broomsticks?"

Aurora and Lily nodded. Sirius glared. James continued. "She thought our Sirius was quite fetching and would happily trade firewhiskey for sexual fav....."

Sirius interrupted. "It wasn't like that. You make me sound like a whore exchanging goods for services. We had a bit of an affair, a quite educational affair actually, and she looked the other way while I pilfered from the bar. And now that we've played yet another round of Sirius: The Slutty Years, how about we find something embarrassing about James to talk about? I can promise you, there's plenty." He tried to keep his tone light but failed.

"Sorry Pads. I didn't think....."

Sirius' face softened. Never could stay mad at James for more than a moment. Maybe Aurora had gone suddenly deaf through the story.....

"Well, it sounds like I owe Rosmerta a thank you card because clearly, you received an excellent education," Aurora smiled up at Sirius, winked, and pulled his head down for a kiss that lasted a bit too long for the comfort of those not doing the kissing.

James and Lily gazed at the sunset for a moment or two or five before James turned back and cleared his throat loudly. "Okay knock it off or go back to the cove, you two."

Sirius looked up at him. "That was for all the nights I had to sleep on the couch in the common room because the two of you had a sock on the door. "

Lily laughed. "We had that coming."

"Oh! I thought of an embarrassing James story! The night he lost his virginity!" Sirius exclaimed triumphantly.

"We are not discussing the night James lost his virginity!" Lily gasped. "And it was NOT embarrassing!"

"Who's to say YOU were even there, Evans?" Sirius smiled mischievously.

"WHAT?" Lily glared at James.

James glared at Sirius.

"It all started one night while James and I were bored...."

"Every bad thing that happened at Hogwarts started that way," growled Lily.

Sirius ignored Lily as well as James' silent pleas for him to stop and continued. "It was late February and still a bit icy out so I bet our James here that he wouldn't go jump in the lake naked."

James relaxed a bit now knowing where the story was going .

"Of course, he agreed as any good Gryffindor whose honor was at stake would and so we went outside. Me in my winter coat and scarf because it was freezing and James in...less," Sirius smirked.

Aurora laughed.

"If we're going to tell it then I'M going to tell it before you embellish any important parts," James insisted.

"I think we can both agree that certain parts needed embellishment. A LOT of embellishment." Sirius winked at his audience.

"Shut it."

"So James stripped off his clothes and jumped in the lake...."

"I had calculated the cold and how long I would have to stay in to preserve my dignity...."

"No chance of that...."

"But I hadn't considered the grindylows...."

"They'll just grab onto anything flapping around in their vicinity apparently...."

"There is a fine line between pleasure and pain, my friends...."

Sirius, Aurora, and Lily were all crying with laughter. Even James laughed a bit.

"So what did you do?" Aurora asked wiping her eyes.

"I did what any best mate would do. I ran for a teacher! I wasn't going to get that thing off him."

"He brought back McGonagall. He couldn't even find a male teacher!"

"I found three male teachers. It took awhile before I found McGonagall."

James glared at him. Lily and Aurora laughed louder.

"What? There was a grindylow stuck on your wanker! We needed the head of house for such an intricate operation."

Lily fell down in the sand laughing.

"I hate all of you," James hissed.

"So...what...did...McGonagall...do?" Lily hyperventilated.

"Well, she took one look at the situation and realized that, like me, she wanted nothing to do with James' wanker and went back in to find a male teacher. Probably one of the ones I passed up."

"I was freezing my bollocks off in the meantime," James glared at Sirius.

"So McGonagall comes out with Slughorn who is like "my, my, I expected more from you, Mr. Potter" and I said, "sir, it's freezing in there, he can't help the size of it!"

All three were in hysterics in the sand with James' face bright red by the firelight.

"So...did...he...get...it...off?" Aurora asked in hysterics.

Sirius looked at Aurora in horror for a moment. "OH! The grindylow! I thought you meant...oh no, he didn't know the spell to get it off so McGonagall had to teach it to him. It was quite a complicated spell. Took a good thirty minutes before he got it right."

"I should have just jumped back in the lake and drowned myself."

"By the time Slughorn finally got it mastered, there was quite a crowd. Someone was taking bets as to whether poor James would even be able to keep...Little James. Really little James in that weather. I was really glad I'd worn my heavy coat."

"Move it along," James growled.

"So the good news is that Slughorn did manage to get it off and Little James was basically okay which quite disappointed some of the local bookies. So sorry, Lily, you weren't first. A grindylow beat you to it by at least two years."

"That was the best story ever," Lily wiped her eyes and tried to sit upright.

"Definitely. The most interesting thing that ever happened in Ravenclaw was when somebody stole someone else's book."

"That sounds painfully boring, love. You should have got yourself sorted into our house," Sirius kissed the top of Aurora's head.

"You can't choose," Aurora said.

"Sure you can! That hat takes suggestions," Sirius insisted. "You think 1000 years of Slytherin just gets reversed for no reason? I begged that hat not to put me in Slytherin."

James rolled his eyes having heard this theory before.

"Seriously? And it listened?" Lily asked.

"Andromeda and I had spent the entire summer analyzing everything we knew about the Sorting Hat. She hadn't tried to manipulate it and got stuck in Slytherin which she already hated and I was determined not to let that happen to me. We were a little concerned that it might backfire though since being manipulative is a Slytherin trait but I finally decided it was worth the risk. Then I met James on the train and he seemed pretty okay and seemed really sure he was going to be in Gryffindor so I thought "what the hell?" If the Hat does take suggestions, then I may as well be specific. "

_Flashback_

_The Great Hall. In what Sirius assumed was karmic torture meant for him and him alone, Headmaster Dumbledore had ordered the sorting to occur in reverse alphabetical order this time and they had gone through most everyone but him, Bellatrix, and two other people by the time his name was called. James had long been at the Gryffindor table as expected. Sirius smirked when Lily Evans got sorted into Gryffindor as well much to the angst of that slimy git from the train. Snivellus or whatever his name was._

_"Sirius Black!"_

_Sirius felt his stomach turn over and was glad that they did this prior to dinner because vomiting all over the floor wasn't the look he was going for. It was struggle enough to keep the chocolate frogs down. Perhaps he shouldn't have eaten so many. He walked slowly up to the bench and sat down. The Sorting Hat sat itself on his head and he began the mantra he had been practicing from Zierke through Boswell. "Gryffindor not Slytherin. Gryffindor not Slytherin." If he said it over and over again in his head maybe the Hat would give in._

_"Gryffindor, eh?" The Hat asked. "There's a thousand years of Slytherin here. Salazar Slytherin's blood runs through your veins. Are you sure you've thought this through? Because once you're sorted, you can never change."_

_"Yes," Sirius pled. "Not Slytherin. Please not Slytherin."_

_"I can see some Gryffindor," the Hat continued. "And perhaps a little more if I were to put you there."_

_"Please," Sirius begged._

_The Hat paused for what seemed like a long time to Sirius, thinking. "Slytherin blood but a Gryffindor heart. Which one to choose?" The Hat yelled out, "Gryffindor!"_

_Both the Gryffindor and Slytherin tables sat in shock for a moment before the Gryffindor table erupted._

_Sirius felt his head swim. Do no pass out. Get up. Good Merlin, it worked. Get up and walk to the table without passing out. He could hear hisses coming from the Slytherin table but he didn't care. He stood and walked over to where James was standing and cheering for him._

_James patted Sirius on the back and moved over on the bench making room for him. Sirius sat down still a bit stunned but slowly beginning to realize that his whole life just changed._

_The Slytherins continued to hiss at him which Sirius really wished would stop. He was surprised when a red haired Gryffindor boy stood up and yelled "Shut it!" at the lot of them. He was even more surprised when they actually quieted._

_The red haired boy reached his hand down the table to Sirius. "Arthur Weasley. Gryffindor prefect. Welcome to Gryffindor. Let me know if that lot give you any trouble. We're always looking for a good fight," he grinned._

_Sirius shook his hand, loving him despite already registering him as "blood traitor". Loving this house. Loving James. Loving Hogwarts._

_End of Flashback_

"That sort of destroys the whole purpose of the Sorting Hat," Aurora complained.

"It doesn't," James insisted. "Sirius thinks that he manipulated the Sorting Hat but the Hat was going to put him in Gryffindor anyway. He's obviously a true Gryffindor. The Hat can't be manipulated and it always chooses right."

"Bollocks," snarled Sirius. "What about Pettigrew? No one is further from a true Gryffindor. Cowardly, little betraying bastard that he is."

Everyone was silent for a moment. James recognized the quiet anger in Sirius' eyes. He mentally called it the Black anger and it was really the only part of Sirius that seemed to belong to that family. Normally, Sirius' anger was a mostly amusing rant and forgotten in minutes but the quiet Black anger was something else entirely. Something dark. Something to be avoided at all costs.

Lily sensed it as well but struggled to change the subject. She felt her lips moving and wanted to make them stop but they were no longer under her control. "You can't just cut him out of your memory, Sirius. I hear you tell stories that I know he was there for but you just assign his role to someone else. It's not healthy. He existed. Yes, he made horrible decisions but...."

"But what...." Sirius glared at her furiously. "But I should just forgive the man responsible for your deaths? For orphaning your son? For 12 years in Azkaban? Never!" He stood abruptly dislocating Aurora and stormed toward the cliffs surrounding the beach.

"I know I shouldn't have said it but I'm not wrong!" Lily said.

Aurora stood up and started to walk after Sirius.

James grabbed her hand. "I wouldn't do that. Let him cool off."

Aurora looked at James and shook her head. "He doesn't need time to cool off, James. He needs someone to help him. I'm not afraid of it. The part of him that you don't understand."

James gaped at Aurora. "I'm not afraid of him."

"Not all of him. Just the dark bit. But that's a part of him too and that's okay. But I won't leave him alone with it." Aurora walked away toward the cliff.

James turned back to Lily. "I don't know what you did there, but thank you for doing it."

"I really didn't do anything but I agree, it's something. Something he's needed for a long time."

***********************************************************************************************

Sirius sat at the edge of the cliff, his feet dangling over the edge, staring at the darkness of the ocean, the clouded sky. The marine layer had rolled in and effectively blocked all the stars, the moon. Total darkness. Like his mood. Why had he let Lily get to him? On today of all days. This perfect day. He hated this part of himself. The cold angry part. It reminded him of his father. He liked to pretend that his mother was the problem and she was certainly a monster but her yelling and violence were hot and fleeting but his father...that icy terrifying anger...was far worse.

"Sirius?" Aurora said softly walking up behind him.

Sirius hadn't heard her approach but his heart leapt at her voice. She shouldn't see this, the voices said. They were right as always. "You should go. I just need some time alone."

Aurora ignored Sirius' suggestion and sat down beside him on the cliff face though a couple inches further back from the edge. No Gryffindor, she. "I don't think so." She took his hand and held it in her lap stroking his thumb. "I think I'll stay here. It's too dark up here for someone to be alone in it."

Sirius wasn't sure if Aurora was talking about the sky or his mood. Both would have been an accurate assessment. They sat silently, staring into the darkness. He felt the ice slowly melt as she continued to carefully explore every inch of his hand. His hand felt warm, really warm. He could feel the heat slowly spread up his arm and through his body. "I'm sorry I was such an arsehole before. I don't know why I let it get to me."

"Because you blame yourself for choosing Peter to be the secret keeper. Trusting Peter." She nestled against him and he put his arm around her. She took his other hand and slowly massaged it. "You shouldn't though. There was no evidence that he had the intellect, the cunning to be a double agent. In retrospect, I would think that what looked like friendship in the moment looks more like hero worship now. That rather than a loyal friend, he was a "yes-man" to the most powerful people he knew at the time. Of course once a more powerful person came along, he switched his allegiance. But all that is retrospect. With the information you had at the time, I would have come to the same conclusion you did. To make him the secret keeper. Sometimes, you just calculate incorrectly."

Sirius was silent, listening to her. Is it that simple?

"That's how I died, you know."

Sirius was startled. "I'm sorry. I should have asked...."  
"No, no. I wasn't saying that. Not really first date fodder, is it? So how did you die?"

"Is this really a normal first date?"

Aurora smiled. "Best first date ever."

Sirius smiled and pulled her closer. "Yes, it is."

"My point was that I caused my own death because I calculated incorrectly. I was working on a potion that I knew was potentially deadly and I miscalculated the amount of dragon scale and poof, no more before world. The last thing I saw was my nine year old daughter screaming for help....and I blamed myself for awhile. How could I have been so stupid? But I wasn't. I considered the situation thoroughly. Looked at all the angles and made what seemed like the best decision in the moment. In retrospect, I should have realized that the dragon scales might react badly with the hippogriff tears but there was no way to know that at the time."

"I should have seen that Peter was changing though," Sirius insisted.

"I should have seen that Hippogriff tears were flammable when mixed with dragon scale but I quite loved Hippogriffs and refused to believe that they could be anything but neutral. I couldn't see past my prejudice and I paid for it but that doesn't mean I have to suffer the guilt of abandoning my daughter for all eternity. It was never my intention to abandon her any more than it was your intention to get James and Lily killed or to orphan Harry. Your intentions were to help them, to save them, and you simply got the math wrong. You need to forgive yourself."

"What if I don't know how?" Sirius whispered.

"Then I'll help you, keep reminding you, until you can do it yourself," Aurora murmured. She turned to face him. "I'm here now. You don't have to be alone in the dark ever again." She kissed him, gently at first and then their tongues meeting, searching, desperate.

Sirius laid down on the rock pulling Aurora on top of him. It's ridiculous to love someone you just met this much, he thought. To need her this much. He rolled over on top of her kissing her deeply, disposing of the blanket that separated them, kissing down her stomach, his tongue exploring her, his fingers inside her, until he could feel her climax, hear her moaning his name. He thrust into her then, finally together, finally light in the darkness.

*************************************************************************************************

Sirius and Aurora were wrapped in each other, legs and arms entangled in a pretzel of a mess with little hope of disentanglement. The blanket was haphazardly thrown over them. They faced each other, faces centimeters apart. Afterglow.

"That was...." Sirius whispered.

"I know...." Aurora murmured.

"I didn't know...."

"Me neither."

"You were married." Pain.

"Not like this. Not...he wasn't...inside of me."

Sirius looked confused. "Luna?"  
"I didn't mean physically. I mean...like this. Like us. The way you are inside of me. Inside of my soul."

Sirius moved his head a half an inch to touch her forehead with his. "Me too." They lay in silence, gently stroking each other. "Is it weird that I can't move my legs?"

Aurora laughed and kissed him. "Not weird. Just amazing sex."

"That it was. I never...I've never been with someone I loved before. It's different. Better. I didn't really understand that until now. How it could be better."

Aurora kissed him gently. "I'm happy to be your first then."

"And last." Sirius' eyes drooped. They both started to drift into sleep.

"The sun's coming up," Aurora murmured. "Our first night together."

"Perfect," Sirius whispered.


	8. We'll Always Have Paris

The sun was high in the sky as James and Lily hiked up the overgrown path leading to the cliff overlooking their beach paradise.

"I really don't think they're lost, James," Lily said for the third time that morning.

"I don't think you understand how bad his sense of direction is. It's like that part of his brain took a bludger and never recovered. And it was dark and these cliffs...."

"You're cute when you're worried." Lily took his hand and squeezed it. "But I'm 100% sure they're fine." She redirected James's eyes to where she was looking near the cliff face. A pile of tangled limbs and blanket and hair greeted them. "As I was saying."

"Who sleeps like that? That can't be healthy. "

"We used to sleep like that," Lily reminded him a bit wistfully.

"We're still sleeping like that,"Sirius muttered sleepily into Aurora's silky blonde hair. He remembered burying his face there to block out the sun. How long ago had that been? It was still too bright. He burrowed deeper into the silky softness of Aurora's hair..

"Well, now that you're awake, we were thinking a spot of breakfast or really lunch might be nice. Hungry?" James asked

"Sod off."

James turned to Lily. "He's normally more of a morning person."

"He normally didn't just go to sleep," Sirius muttered. 

"Why are they so noisy?" Aurora asked sleepily burrowing her face in Sirius' long dark hair. Sun too bright. Hair better. Sleep. 

"Because they're evil." 

"We're not evil. We're hungry. And you're awake so let's go!" Lily kicked the pile of limbs lightly. "The next kick is going higher up."

"Evil." Sirius tried to sit up, realized that his limbs were not going to cooperate. He looked down at the mess of limbs and blanket. "This may be hopeless. Just bring us food." He laid back down.

"That's it. You're getting up. The sun's been up for hours, we're hungry, we don't know where we are or where we're going so let's go." Lily whispered a spell and disentangled the legs and the blankets. 

Sirius and Aurora sat up. Aurora grabbed the blanket back. "Okay, okay, we're coming," Sirius moaned. "Just give us an hour to...uh...."

James rolled his eyes.

"You get 15 minutes," Lily dictated. "We'll meet you on the beach." 

Sirius watched them go and then pushed Aurora back down. 

"So a quickie then?" Aurora asked.  
"No...." Sirius kissed her neck, her ear lobes as he remembered how much she loved it last night, her breasts, her stomach, his tongue making her moan and arch her hips for more. "No quickie." 

"15 minutes...." 

"I said an hour," Sirius mumbled his tongue otherwise occupied.

Aurora grabbed his hair as she came.

"Mmm. Hair pulling. You naughty girl," Sirius said crawling up her body to kiss her. "You may have to pay for that." He pinned her hands back and entered her, plunging deeper and deeper. He let go of her hands and massaged her as he thrust in and out, feeling her orgasm shuddering around him, feeling her pull his hair again, the tiny bit of pain that drove his pleasure over the top as he came inside of her and then collapsed on top of her, gasping for breath. 

*********************************************************************************************

The California sun glistened off the crystal blue waters of the Pacific.

"I can't believe it's been an hour," Lily said as she watched the gentle waves ebb and flow in front of her.

James looked nonplussed half asleep in the sun. "You'd think you would have learned being prefect that he's going to do the opposite of what you tell him to do." He looked up at her. "Besides, isn't this what you wanted? Me all to yourself?" 

Lily smiled at him. "I did want that." She laid down next to James and he put his arm around her. 

James kissed her lightly. "I have to say, I quite enjoyed sleeping with you instead of him last night." 

Lily flushed at the memory. "Me too." 

"Us aside though, you did a really wonderful thing, Lily. She's perfect for him."

"Even when she calls you out?"

"Especially then." James turned to face Lily. "He's my brother. He couldn't be more my brother if we were blood. All I want for him is someone who loves him completely. Not that I don't but she's not wrong. I don't know what to do with that Black part. I love him despite it but I think maybe she loves that part too and that's what he deserves. Especially after...."

"Azakaban wasn't your fault, James."

"Of course, it was, love. I should have told Dumbledore that we switched. I should have told someone....12 years in Azkaban. I can't even stand to think about him there. The way he looked when he came here. So broken....."

"Shh. He's so much better now. You have to forgive yourself, James." 

"I'm not sure I can."

Lily saw Sirius and Aurora approaching and pulled away from James. "It's about time! Any longer and you would have come back to skeletons!"

Sirius put his arms around Aurora and smiled. "Some things were more...pressing."

Lily rolled her eyes. "James, can we go now?"

James snapped out of his reverie and stood. "Yes, please!"

"Where are we going?" Aurora asked leaning against Sirius. I love his arms. His fingers. That mole. What did I just ask?  
"I've always wanted to see Paris," Lily announced.

"I love Paris!" Sirius exclaimed. "Andromeda et moi pour aller de boulangerie pour la boulangerie et le charme des pâtisseries à venir à nous parce que nous ne pouvions pas comprendre comment utiliser l'argent moldu."

Aurora and Lily looked surprised and impressed.

James snorted. "Nice, Pads. Where was that game yesterday, huh?" 

"I still think you put a silencing spell on me and you can't prove otherwise," Sirius grinned. 

"It certainly couldn't have been you falling head over heels for a girl you just met," James said.

Aurora blushed as did Sirius.

"Yeah, you'd never do that, James." Sirius winked at Lily. "At least it didn't take me 6 years to convince her to go out with me."

"More like 6 seconds," Lily muttered under her breath.

"Okay enough of this. I really am starving." Aurora grabbed Lily and James' hands in hers, made sure Sirius was still hugging her and thought about the Eiffel Tower and voila....

The four of them looked off the top of the Eiffel Tower down to the gardens below. "I should have thought about the foot of the tower," Aurora moaned. 

Sirius laughed and grabbed three hands. "I know a wonderful boulangerie." 

A moment later, the four of them were comfortably seated in the Coquelicot in Montmartre which was the most heavenly smelling bakery any of them had ever experienced. The wizard behind the counter floated several delectable items in their direction: croissants, au clairs, cafe au lait.....

The artists of Montmartre painted in the ancient streets outside, displaying their wares to an appreciative crowd of wizards. Old Paris at her finest....

"Andromeda and I discovered this place after the muggle bakeries began to wonder where their sweets had all gone," Sirius said.

"Andromeda?" Aurora asked.

"My cousin. The only non vile member of my family," Sirius explained helping himself to a second au clair. 

"Your brother, Regulus, wasn't vile," Lily said quietly.

"He was a Death Eater and a coward. How much more vile does it get?" Sirius asked darkly. 

Aurora gently rubbed his hand. The light again. Sirius wasn't sure what she was doing but it worked.....

********************************************************************************************************  
"I can't believe none of you have been to the Louvre!" Sirius exclaimed with horror. "The art, the statues, the borrowed without permission Egyptian artifacts...never?"

"I'm a bit surprised you have actually. Isn't it a Muggle museum?" James asked.

"DaVinci transcends such artifice," Sirius said in a haughty tone. "And my father was convinced he was a wizard."

"I went on a class trip once but we were 8 and not really all that appreciative," Lily said.

Aurora held out her hand to Sirius. "Lead the way."

 

Sirius apparated them all to the Louvre and then stopped dead in front of I.M. Pei's pyramid. "What the bloody hell is that?"

"It's fascinating," James said examining the diamond shaped panes of the glass pyramid. 

"It's an abomination! An outrage!" Sirius raged. 

"Doesn't really fit with the rest of it," Aurora said.

"It does not," Sirius said in disgust. "This isn't the Centre Pompidou! This PALACE doesn't house PICASSOS! It's anathema! What happened to respecting tradition? The purity of the architecture has been completely ruined!"

"Is this the wrong time to point out that if you were to substitute this pyramid for a muggle born, you'd sound like Orion Black?" James asked.

Sirius turned and glared at him.

"I see now that it is indeed the wrong time..." James smirked.

"Okay, I'm done now. Consider my hidden snob checked," Sirius said quietly realizing that James was right.

"Come on, let's go in. Just shut your eyes until we're passed it," Lily suggested.

They wandered aimlessly through the massive museum with Sirius much comforted to learn that while they had built an utterly atrocious pyramid in front they still didn't house anything later than the mid 19th century inside. 

While Lily and Sirius examined a particularly graphic Delacroix, Aurora joined James on a bench. 

"Not an art fan?" Aurora asked.

"It's not that. It's just that...I can't quite put my finger on it. The depths of emotion, of tragedy in some of these paintings.... I feel like that's something more Muggle than Wizard," James tried to explain. 

"I'm surprised to hear you say that, James. You've experienced your own tragedy losing Harry," Aurora said.

"But I wouldn't express it this way. Even if I could paint," James said.

"No. Because your life has been mostly light. These muggle painters, I think they had a lot of darkness. Like Sirius. If he could paint, how do you think he'd express himself?"

"It's the darkness again then," James said quietly.

"It's okay to have a little fear of something foreign to you and it's certainly nothing to be ashamed of that you've had a pretty good life. That you were brought up with love. But not everyone was and that doesn't necessarily make them less." 

"I don't think he's less," James said. "It's not that. He's my best friend, my brother, I trust him absolutely. I just...I don't know how to handle that dark bit. I do usually make him talk about it, by the way. I just let him cool off first because that icy anger makes my skin crawl. But I don't just leave him alone with it."

"You don't have to justify yourself to me, James. I know you love him," Aurora said.

"I think you do too," James said. Maybe she'll heal him, heal what Azkaban did to him, what his parents did to him.

"I do," Aurora confirmed. "It's not your fault he ended up in Azkaban."

James looked at her in shock. Legilimens?

"I think I would blame myself in your position," Aurora said. "Though were you even sure you could trust Dumbledore? I assume that you didn't think so. Otherwise why not make him the secret keeper?"

"I didn't trust him," James said. "Neither did Sirius. Really, we didn't trust anyone but each other."

"So you blame yourself for Azkaban and he blames himself for your deaths and Harry ending up an orphan but no one seems to blame Peter Pettigrew for switching sides to feed his own ambition, Voldemort for killing you, the Ministry for suspending due process...."

"I'm beginning to see why Lily chose you," James said with a small smile. "It's good to bring some logic occasionally."

"Seven years of Ravenclaw, at your service," Aurora smiled. "Though I was just thinking how much I was enjoying the emotion and spontaneity." 

Sirius and Lily had moved on to a DaVinci with no end in sight.

"This day could use a little spontaneity," James agreed. He held out his hand to Aurora. She gave it to him after only a moment's hesitation. They walked over to Lily and Sirius, grabbed their hands and let James take them to.....


	9. If Only You Were Wizards

They were sitting around a campfire near Kata Tjuta in the Australian Outback.

"Are you sure a country where everything is poisonous is the best choice for this?" Lily asked for the third time.

Aurora looked nervous. "I could have met Padfoot in our hotel room."

"Nonsense!" James said.

" We grew up playing with a werewolf. We'll be fine," Sirius agreed. "Ready Prongs?"

James transformed in response. Sirius followed suit. He nuzzled Aurora with his big black nose and then they ran off into the dark red desert leaving the women to tend the fire.

Aurora stared into the fire deep in thought.

"Everything okay?" Lily asked.

"Just remembering what potions cure which venoms."

"They'll be okay. There are some nasty things in the Forbidden Forest and nothing ever got them."

"I just...I just don't like him being gone. Not knowing if he's okay. Which is the opposite of the feminist I'd like to think I am," Aurora laughed a bit. Trying to lighten up.

"Loving someone and worrying about them doesn't make you less of a feminist, Aurora." Lily smiled. "Though it makes me so happy how much you care about him. He's not had an easy life. Even at Hogwarts, that awful family of his made his life hell."

"What do you mean?"

"You weren't there yet when he was first sorted into Gryffindor. I know he thinks he made that choice but either way, I don't think he really considered the consequences until the next morning at breakfast when his mother sent him a howler. He and James had already managed to get on my bad side but even I felt horrible for him. "

_Flashback_

_The Great Hall. Sirius, James, Remus and Peter sat together excitedly discussing everything while plowing through stacks of pancakes, bacon, etc._

_"I can't believe you have a quidditch pitch in your backyard, James! It's not fair. I'm stuck in London with no way to fly anything without the Muggles seeing and we hardly EVER go to the country house any more."_

_Remus mouthed "country house?" into his pancakes but said nothing._

_"You can't fly at all?" James asked._

_"Regulus and I cleared out part of the attic and set something up but it's not the same as being outside. Father bought us new Nimbus 500s though. They're amazing! Do you have one?"_   
_"Got one as soon as they came out. You have to come stay with me so we can play outside. I can't believe we can't try out for the team until next year."_

_"It's not fair at all. It's not like we can't already fly. It's not like we can't already do most of this stuff."_

_"Your parents let you do magic at home?" Peter asked quietly._

_"Of course. It's encouraged," Sirius explained as if that were obvious. "How else would you get ahead? I've been moving things since I was three and doing spells since I was five."_

_"I don't think that's legal," Remus said thoughtfully._

_"Yeah, my parents let me do little things but not spells," James said._

_Sirius realized his mistake but wasn't sure how to walk it back. "Yeah, well..." He was interrupted by the owl post._

_James, Remus, and Peter got letters. Sirius got a howler._

_"What's that?" James asked._

_Sirius stared at it. He knew what it was and he didn't want to open it. The howler started to smoke and grow angry._

_A Gryffindor from down the table yelled, "You may as well open it before it opens itself! No way to get around it. Can't imagine what you've done to get a howler the first day of school though."_

_Sirius touched it carefully like it was burning his fingers, opened it just as carefully praying to the gods of whoever were listening to make it be empty. It wasn't._

**Sirius Orion Black, we can not believe you've done this to us. Humiliated the family! Gryffindor!!!! The disgrace! You are a horrible disappointment to us all. HORRIBLE. I'd rather you DIED than be sorted into that house. My only solace is that we have another son with which to salvage the family name. We will never forgive you for this betrayal. ~ Mother**

_The howler burned itself out as the Gryffindors all stared at Sirius in silence. He could hear the snickering of the Slytherins three tables over. He didn't dare look at James, Remus, and Peter. He felt tears coming fast and fled the Great Hall. He didn't see James, Remus, and Peter looking at him with concern and a bit of anger on his behalf. Didn't hear the older Gryffindors shout down the snickering Slytherins. Didn't see his cousin Andromeda's sadness._

_He got out into the hall and found a quiet corner to regroup. He slid down the wall and let the tears come hating himself for every one of them. Because tears were weak. Because his family didn't deserve them. He didn't hear James, Remus, and Peter approach until they had sat down in front of him._

_"Your mom's kind of a wanker, huh?" Remus asked softly._

_Sirius looked up at him, at them, surprised to see them. "Yeah. Kind of." He almost laughed but couldn't quite do it._

_"I guess now we know why they've all been in Slytherin," James said. "You're where you belong, Sirius. With us."_

_Sirius did smile then at his friends. Friends. A new word in his vocabulary in the last 24 hours. He liked it._

_"So I think we're expected to attend classes?" Remus said. "Care to join us?"_

_"Definitely," Sirius smiled mood dramatically approved. Friends are good, he thought and put his arms around James and Remus as they walked through the busy halls to their first class._

_End of Flashback_

" Whenever Sirius would really annoy me, I'd try to remember that day though he was REALLY annoying sometimes," Lily said.

"I hate her. I haven't met her and I want to cause her physical harm. Is that awful?"

"No." Lily smiled. "It's exactly the reaction I was looking for."

"I didn't know that Sirius and James were ever on your bad side. There's so much love there."

"You have no idea! James particularly drove me crazy. Sirius... He drove me crazy when he was with James but when it was just us, he was different, quieter. My sister hated me about as much as his mom hated him and he was really the only person I could talk to about her." She sighed. "I'm not sure I would have fallen in love with James had I not seen him through Sirius' eyes."

"Speaking of which...."

*******************************************************************

Sirius and James stood motionless, staring at the giant hissing snake, Padfoot and Prongs abandoned.

"If there's some Parselmouth running in your family that you didn't want to tell me about, now's the time to confess, " James whispered.

"Sorry, mate. Not even Black caliber pure blood inbreeding managed to keep that skill in the family with any sort of regularity. Where's Harry when you need him?"

"What?"

"Nothing." Shit. "What are we going to do about this? Run?"

"If only you were wizards," Lily said dryly, walking up behind them.

"Stupefy," Aurora said and the snake dropped.

"You're no longer allowed out by yourselves. Really. Run?" Lily shook her head.

Sirius and James looked sheepish.

"Lily and I have decided we'd prefer beds that aren't full of spiders. You're welcome to join us," Aurora murmured pressing herself against Sirius, her arms snaking around him, "or you can play out here with James." She cupped his ass feeling him grow hard even through their clothes. She smiled. "Totally up to you."

Lily watched Sirius' eyes glaze over and knew that they'd won.

"Padfoot, don't desert me!" James begged.

"Bed sounds good...." Sirius murmured pulling Aurora closer. " Definitely bed...."

"Traitor!"

"My turn to choose," Aurora said grabbing their hands.


	10. A Tale as Old as Time

Aurora landed them in an ancient, dark structure. Sirius felt his lungs constricting. No air. "Where are we?" he gasped. 

"Tibet," Aurora breathed in awe. "An abandoned monastery outside Lhasa. Na speuran 'S e seo. The sky is here," she whispered trance-like.

"The air is not," muttered James. 

Lily looked out the window at the sun setting over Mount Everest, the moon rising and gasped. "The sky IS here."

They wandered outside to watch the earth disappear from the sun. Sirius wrapped his arms around Aurora, slowly acclimating to the altitude. "I feel it here. Vibrating."

"I wish you could see it," Aurora murmured. "It's stunning."

"Feeling it is enough," James whispered reverently. "I thought you were a bit mad until now but...."

"Can we...get it back...what we lost?" Sirius asked. 

"What's lost is lost until it's found," Aurora said. 

The sun set and the mountain grew cold. Winter came earlier here and it was already mid October. 

Sirius led Aurora inside and James and Lily followed. 

"What should we do for a fire? There's nothing really here that will burn," Lily looked around. 

Sirius breathed in deeply, feeling the thin air, the thick magic in his lungs and muttered "incendio." A fire sprung up in the air floating above them. He gently laid it on the stone ground. "Interesting."

"Bloody impressive. What did you transfigure?" James asked.  
Sirius thought for a long moment. "The air, I guess."

Lily looked surprised. 

Aurora looked on with interest. "Focus on the air. What else can it be?" She sat beside the fire and warmed her hands. 

Sirius breathed again, focused. Blankets rained down on the foursome followed by a bottle of Firewhiskey that hovered in the air over the fire. Four tumblers joined it. The bottle uncorked itself and gracefully emptied its contents into the four tumblers sending each tumbler into a waiting hand. The bottle then wafted to the ground beside Sirius. 

James, Lily, and Aurora applauded, tumblers in hand.

"Very impressive," James said. "Let me try." He breathed in and focused but nothing happened. "How did you do it?"

"I just thought about the air particles creating a fire or whiskey or whatever. Same as normal transfiguration, except with air."

James tried again and managed to produce a large puff of smoke. "Why is it so easy for you?"

"Maybe that millennium of pure blood inbreeding is finally paying off," Sirius joked.

"I'm a pure blood!"

"I think he is Darach or was born into a Darach family anyway. His magic is more pure, more Druid than yours. He doesn't remember his connection to the earth and sky but it's there," Aurora explained staring into the fire.

"That seems dangerously close to a speech at a Death Eater rally," Lily spat.

Aurora blanched. "That's not what I meant! Muggle borns aren't less. They're just different. Like James is different. Darach is not a good thing to be but it is a powerful thing to be."

Sirius looked troubled. "What is Darach and what did my reprehensible ancestors do to cause it?"

"Darach is simply a Druid who took a dark path. Who practices in the dark...in the black...instead of the light." Aurora conjured several candelabras and placed them around the quickly darkening stone room. "It doesn't mean you're the only one who can manipulate the air, by the way." She smirked at him and continued. "Over a thousand years ago, all Druids were one but then twins were born to the high priestess, a male and a female. The female followed the Druid way, the light, but the male who was born second didn't see the light, only the black and he followed the path that he saw. The Druids could not abide this blackness and he was exiled to the world. "

"My ancestor," Sirius said darkly.

"I believe so." Aurora turned to Sirius. "The abandoned sister was heartbroken, said to cry tears that flooded the lands and created the lochs. She longed to find her brother but the Druids held her bound to them." She paused. "She was my ancestor. We are the dark and the light reunited. I believe that's what the dreams of the forest foretold and why this..." She took his hand and felt him move toward her almost involuntarily. "...is what it is. The light cannot be light without the dark and the dark cannot survive without the light. It has been prophesied for generations that the reunion must occur because true darkness is coming and we have hope only if we are two sides of the whole."

The four of them set in silence, digesting Aurora's words. 

Sirius wasn't sure how he felt about what she'd said. He loved her with every part of him, down to the depths of his tortured soul...wasn't that enough? But here, in this place, he knew the truth. Felt the exiled Darach inside of him. Felt the abandoned Druid inside of her. Pulled her closer to him because there was no alternative but union.

Even James seemed speechless. Staring into the fire. It was Lily who finally broke the silence, the spell that had been cast on the room by the story. "I was honestly just trying to get James back in MY bed....."

The absurdity of it all broke the moment and all four laughed. Sirius looked sheepish. "Sorry about that."

Lily smiled. "It's okay. I was aware when I married him that I would have to share though perhaps not aware to what extent."

"You did get him to yourself for 14 years," Sirius pointed out. 

"14 sad years. He's not really James when you're not around," Lily mused.

"I'm sorry. I thought I was doing a better job of hiding that," James said.

"You'd just lost your son and your brother. There's nothing to be sorry for," Lily said kissing James softly on the mouth. "And now you're you again." 

Sirius flinched a bit at the mention of Harry. Guilt over not thinking of him more often. His godson. The closest thing he would ever have to his own child. 

James was thinking about Harry too, remembering a comment Sirius had made while they were dealing with the snake in the Outback. "Why did you say that thing about Harry when we were dealing with the snake?"  
Sirius looked confused. He wasn't confused. Knew where James was headed but didn't want to make the journey. 

"I jokingly asked if you were a Parselmouth and you said "where's Harry when we need him?" Why would you say that?" James asked. Sirius' silence was making him nervous. "What haven't you told us about our son?"

Sirius sighed. It was unrealistic to think they would never find out. "Harry's a parselmouth."

"How is that possible?" Lily asked.

"Isn't that hereditary? Your family?" Aurora asked James.

"Absolutely not," James replied. He looked at Sirius. "Tell us."

"It's not just that he's a parselmouth. He's...it's a bit hard to explain."

"Try," James spat.

Sirius sighed and took a long drink of firewhiskey giving in to the inevitable. "You know that Voldemort used the killing curse against Harry and it backfired. It's like that left some...residue...of Voldemort in Harry. The parselmouth. Other things."

"What other things?" Lily demanded. "What's wrong with our son?"

"Nothing's wrong with him!" Sirius felt defensive on Harry's behalf. "He's a good kid. A good man."

"But...." James said softly.

"It started with his scar hurting whenever Voldemort was near. A sort of warning system. But then he started having these dreams. He thought they were dreams but really he was seeing through Voldemort's eyes."

Lily gasped. 

Aurora listened with interest cataloging the possible causes and consequences of being able to see through someone else's eyes. Some prophetic dreams came from that vantage point but this sounded different.

"That's sort of how I died. Voldemort finally realized the connection they had and used it against him. Planted a vision that Harry thought was real and used it to lure him," Sirius said. 

"It's Harry's fault you're dead?" James asked.

"No! Of course, it wasn't Harry's fault!"Sirius said angrily. "Dumbledore had Snape teaching him occlumency. Snape! Who he hated. Teaching him something that requires you to control your emotions completely. It was utterly ridiculous. How could anyone learn occlumency under those circumstances?!?" Sirius ranted. "It's Bella's fault I'm dead. My fault. Dumbledore's fault. Not Harry's. Never Harry's," Sirius spat out furiously glaring at James.

"I'm sorry," James said softly then smiled. 

Lily smiled too and leaned over and kissed Sirius gently on the cheek. "Thank you." 

Sirius was confused which dampened his anger. "For what?"

"For loving our son like he was your own," Lily said softly. "We knew you would. It's why we chose you to be his godfather."


	11. A Comedy of Zebras

As the sun rose over the roof of the world, it was time to move on. Sirius grabbed three hands and shouted, "My turn!" 

The foursome stood on the Serengeti in Tanzania, the sun beating down on them. Sirius looked at James. "Time for Padfoot and Prongs to make friends," he grinned.

"I love where this is headed, Pads."

"And for the ladies...." Sirius focused whispering to himself. A small but elegant wizard tent appeared conjured from the air. It set itself up complete with a small porch. "...beds," he grinned. 

Aurora was impressed, looking quickly around the well equipped two bedroom tent. "You see the air now?"

"Yeah. I see it now. I still can't see the magic though."

"It'll come back to you," Aurora kissed Sirius. As usual what was intended as an innocent kiss began to deepen. 

"No beds yet! Prongs wants to play!" James shouted and grabbed Sirius by the arm, pulling him away from Aurora before things got out of hand. James transformed quickly but Sirius extended his hand to Aurora. 

"Come play with us."

"I'm not an animagus..." Aurora began. "...but I have always wanted to go on safari." She took Sirius' hand and laughed as it turned into a big, black paw. "Come on Lily!"

The foursome came across a herd of zebras first. Padfoot walked up to one sniffing it. He walked around the confused animal taking stock of it and then transformed to human form. 

James followed suit. "What's up, Padfoot?"

Sirius held up a finger. "Quiet please." He looked the zebra in the eyes for a long moment, took a breath, and transformed his foot into a hoof. It was a slower transformation than Padfoot but he eventually became a zebra.

"That's not possible," James muttered indignantly. "That's not how it works! That's not how it works at ALL!"

Zebra-Sirius walked toward the herd who seemed willing to accept him as one of their own.

"Is this a Druid thing too?" Lily asked Aurora.

Aurora shrugged slightly. "Possibly. It's very rare though."

A female zebra became overly interested in Zebra-Sirius arching her back, raising her hindquarters. Zebra-Sirius realized what was expected of him and quickly changed back to human rejoining the group. 

"Even zebras can't resist him," Lily laughed. 

"What's wrong, mate? Thought she should have bought you dinner first?" James chortled. 

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sure that story will become one of your favorites. Embellished to resemble nothing close to the truth," laughed Sirius.

Aurora laughed and kissed him. "You really are irresistible in all forms."


	12. Samhain

"It's almost Halloween!" James realized as they sat outside a bodega in Ronda, Spain sipping sangria out of a carafe that they passed from person to person. 

Sirius cringed. A holiday that used to be about topping the party of the year before now brought back memories of James' and Lily's lifeless bodies. 

"Remember that party we threw fifth year? Somebody spiked the punch with that muggle drug...what's it called again? The one that causes the hallucinations?" James asked Lily.

"LSD. Yes. My first Halloween as a prefect and my fellow prefect was convinced that his skin was melting off," Lily said. "It was a real treat. By the way, I know that the 'somebody' who spiked it was the two of you. Remus confessed when he thought he was being choked to death by Cornish pixies."

James looked unrepentant. "Remember Pads, that one sixth year girl from Hufflepuff was suddenly convinced that she had "the sight" and was telling everyone the awful ways they were going to die?"

Sirius was lost in another Halloween where people did die. 

"Pads? What's up?" James asked.

"You died on Halloween," Sirius said almost inaudibly. 

Aurora put her hand on Sirius' hand and felt his fingers curl around hers.

"So it was. We'd considered taking Harry out trick or treating but it was chilly that night," Lily said.

James shivered and took Lily's hand. 

"Instead of a party, maybe we should celebrate more traditionally," Aurora suggested. "The Druids call it Samhain not Halloween and rather than a night of drunken debauchery, you can experience the true meaning of the holiday."

"Which is?" Lily asked.

"It's the moment when time collapses and there is no future, no past, no present. They are all one. In the before world, the ceremony is to honor the dead and also to make sure that they...we...stay dead though there is much merging of the worlds between twilight and dawn..so much so that we may be able to visit that world in some form. Probably not a corporeal form but perhaps as a ghost or spirit. Unless someone on the other side keeps us out, of course."

"But we could see Harry? Luna?" Lily said.

"Possibly. Possibly not. Even if we could see them, it's unlikely we could make contact. We wouldn't be as corporeal as the Gray Lady or Nearly Headless Nick but I think we could maybe see them."

"I would like to try," Lily said. 

Sirius and James nodded. 

"We'll need to perform the ceremony at the water's edge of the loch at Hogwarts and then make our way in. The building is very magical but Samhain requires grounding at the intersection of two elements like earth and water," Aurora explained.

They apparated to Hogwarts Lake as the autumn day fell into twilight. 

"We met right over there," Sirius said. "It seems like yesterday and a thousand years ago."

"Hold on to that feeling. That's the Samhain. The intersection of the earth and the water. Of the past and the present. The intersection of time itself," Aurora explained. She led them to the shore beside the loch. Water lapped gently at their feet. "Join hands," she said quietly and began speaking quickly in Scottish Gaelic. 

Sirius could feel the wind pick up as she spoke, the water whispered, the earth shuddered beneath his feet, a fire raged in his very soul, the elements seemed to dance around them and then time danced and twisted and merged together. He felt magic surging through him and looked at James and Lily. Their eyes were closed, in the throes of it as well and Aurora...Aurora looked like a goddess, the embodiment of light itself, glowing all around her. He felt himself grow lighter somehow. Airier as if he had become the air itself. He no longer felt attached to his body but instead hovered over it, surprised to see it standing on the beach. He looked around and saw that James and Lily and Aurora also floated above their bodies. 

"It is done," Aurora said. She floated toward the castle, its lights glowing in the darkness like a beacon for lost souls. 

Sirius felt his heart grow to bursting as he looked at the castle glowing in the distance. His first true home. The first place where he truly felt safe. Truly felt like he belonged there. 

As they entered the castle, through the walls not the door, Sirius noticed that they weren't the only spirits visiting tonight. 

"They'll be having the Halloween feast," James said, floating toward the Great Hall. The hall was decorated for Halloween but also, Sirius noticed, for the elements. Had it always been that way? The castle's way of welcoming them home?

They floated over the Gryffindor table and found Harry sitting with Hermione. Ron sat with a girl Sirius didn't know and Hermione didn't seem very happy about it. Ginny and Luna sat across from them laughing together. Harry seemed outwardly happy but the happiness didn't quite reach his eyes. He wondered if James and Lily noticed. 

"Do you know the girl with Luna?" Aurora asked. 

"That's Ginny Weasley," Sirius answered. "The Weasleys youngest and an excellent choice for best mate. One of my favorite people."

"THE Ginny?" asked Lily. 

Sirius nodded.

The girls were joined by another boy unknown to the ghosts. He kissed Ginny in a very intimate manner and then joined the group.

"Looks like Harry hasn't quite figured things out yet," Lily said.

"Hasn't he? He looks like he wants to punch that kid," James pointed out.

"Who is the girl across from Luna?" Aurora asked noting that she also seemed to be Luna's friend. 

"That's Hermione Granger," Sirius answered. "Another excellent choice for friend. Really smart."

"I was so afraid she wouldn't make friends," Aurora said. "She was a bit...her own person."

"It seems like she has a lot of friends," Lily said as Neville Longbottom came and sat beside Luna engaging her in a conversation that had them both laughing.

"Neville Longbottom, I believe," said Sirius without being prompted. "His parents were in the Order with us during the first war. My cousin crucio'd them into incurable insanity. I believe his grandmother raised him after that."

"I didn't know that about Frank and Alice," James said frowning. "I always really liked them."

"The red haired boy over there," Sirius pointed to Ron. "..is Ron Weasley. Not sure who he's snogging though." 

They floated to the head table. Sirius floated over to McGonagall and tried desperately to move her fork. "Aren't ghosts supposed to be able to knock things over?"

"Only in fairy tales," Aurora laughed. "I told you we wouldn't be corporeal."

Sirius floated around McGonagall's head trying to attract her attention but seemed to be getting nowhere. It was Dumbledore who turned and looked directly at him for a moment before returning to his conversation. "Do you think he saw me?" Sirius asked.

"Maybe. He's quite powerful," Aurora said. 

Sirius slowly lowered himself to be sitting in McGonagall's lap. "Minnie! Minnie!" he yelled in her ear.

"Even if she does see you, she'll purposely ignore you for being annoying," Lily said.

"She loves me! I'm her favorite," Sirius insisted.

"That is some extraordinary delusion, Sirius, even for you," Lily laughed.

"If I wasn't her favorite, then why did she all but tell me how to become an animagus?" Sirius asked.

"Because she knew you'd never stop bugging her about it," James said. 

"No, I don't believe it. She admired my spirit and initiative and I think felt a bit sorry for me because my parents always sent those awful howlers. Did you know that she confiscated some of them before they even got to me? She couldn't catch them all but she did what she could. She's a good woman," Sirius said affectionately, still sitting in the good woman's lap. 

In the world, Minerva shuddered slightly. Dumbledore turned to her. "Are you okay, Minvera?"

"Yes, I'm fine. I just had the strangest sensation of...love...and mischief," Minerva tried to explain. "I think perhaps I've had a bit too much wine."

Dumbledore smiled. "On tonight of all night's, MInerva, we can't discount a visit from Avalon."


	13. I'll Be Home For Christmas

Lily apparated them to Colmar, France. The little town sparkled with Christmas lights and holiday cheer in a way that seemed straight out of a fairy tale.

"What day is it?" James asked.

"It must be close to Christmas," Lily answered.

"Look at all the lights. So beautiful," Aurora murmured.

Sirius stood watching them silently fighting a battle with the tears that were threatening to spill over. "I want to go home now," he said quietly.

James realized and put his arm around his brother. "Of course, Pads. We'll go home right now," he said gently. He felt Sirius relax a bit. He should have thought of this. Of course, Sirius would want to spend Christmas at home with their parents. "We'll go now." He reached out for Lily's hand.

Aurora looked lost. What now? She felt her heart sinking, her stomach churning. Was she even capable of being away from him....

"Aurora?" Sirius held out his hand.

Aurora felt knots in her stomach.

"Aurora?" Sirius said a bit louder. "Are you coming? You'll love Christmas with the Potters. Mum goes a bit overboard but...."

"You know most of that is for your benefit, right?" James asked. "Because YOU go overboard," he teased.

"I love Christmas!" He paused as a dark thought flitted across his gray eyes. "There, at least." He looked at his still outstretched hand. "Aurora, what's wrong? You have to come. I want them to meet you and we can't be apart at Christmas.... What's wrong, love?"

"I thought you were leaving...." Pathetic. "I thought...."

Sirius kissed her gently on the mouth. "...never leaving." More kissing.

James cleared his throat. "It's going to be New Year's if you don't wrap this up."

Sirius smiled and held out his hand again. Aurora took it and the foursome returned to England.

*****************************************************************************************************  
Euphemia was directing an orchestra of Christmas cheer. Lights flying, trees walking, bulbs floating, tinsel twinkling.

Fleamont watched her shaking his head. "I'm not sure who you're doing that for."

"They'll be here. It's Sirius' first Christmas here and they won't miss it."

Fleamont shook his head. "They've been gone quite a while, Mia. They may not even know that it's Christmas Eve."

"They'll know," Euphemia smiled. "Now get started on the garland please."

Fleamont smiled lovingly at his wife and indulgently twirled the garland around the trees. He fell back startled when four people apparated into the tree on which he'd been working.

"Ow!" Sirius yelled.

"Who put this here..." James moaned. "Ouch! Needles in my face...."

Euphemia beamed and then ran to help disentangle them from the trees.

After much fussing and pulling by Euphemia and Fleamont, the foursome were righted, brushed off, and de-needled to Euphemia's satisfaction and hugging began in earnest starting with Sirius, her prodigal son. "I knew you'd come home," she whispered in his ear, squeezing the life out of him.

"Thank you for giving me a home to come home to," Sirius whispered to her.

Euphemia hugged him even tighter before letting him go and moving on to James and then Lily.

Fleamont grabbed Sirius giving him a hug and firm pat on the back. "Happy Christmas, Son. Glad you all made it home." He winked at Euphemia. "Not that we were in any doubt."

As the hugs went on, Aurora stood shyly away from the action. Hugging families seemed to be part of another person's existence. Even her life with Xenophilius and Luna hadn't been filled with this much hugging. This much warmth. This much love. She felt a pang of sadness as she thought of Luna.

Sirius saw Aurora standing alone and wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her close to him. "They're your family now too, love," he whispered in her ear. "I can't wait for you to meet them." He led her forward toward Fleamont, Euphemia still squeezing Lily half to death. "Dad...I want you to meet Aurora," he said in a reverent tone that didn't go unnoticed by Fleamont.

Fleamont smiled warmly at Aurora. That explains the happy glow, he thought.

Aurora held out her hand to him. "Pleased to meet you, Mr. Potter," she said politely

"Nonsense!" Fleamont pulled Aurora into a hug. "Anyone who makes my son smile like that gets a hug. Welcome to the family, dear."

Aurora stiffened at first but Fleamont's sincerity was infectious and she hugged him back. "I feel like I already know you. Sirius talks about you a lot."

"Mostly when ranting about his love for muggle machinery," James rolled his eyes.

Fleamont brightened. "I do have a new Mazda Miata outside if anyone would like to take a gander...."

James and Lily and Euphemia moaned, "NO!" together.

"Yes!" exclaimed Sirius. "What kind of engine does it have? Have you got it to fly yet because I've been thinking of...."

Aurora missed the rest as Euphemia spoke to her.

"So you must be Aurora." To Lily. "You didn't exaggerate how beautiful she is." Euphemia smiled. "I see our plan worked brilliantly."

Lily laughed. "You have NO idea."

Aurora blushed. "You were in on this too?"

"It was her idea!" Lily exclaimed. "A bit of a shocking suggestion too, I might add. Though absolutely right."

Euphemia shuffled Aurora and Lily into the kitchen. "Come along and you can tell me all about it."

"So I'm thinking it'll fly faster if we...." Sirius continued with his plans for the Miata.

Fleamont interrupted. "I thought they'd never leave! Enough about the Miata, Sirius. Tell me about this Aurora of yours."

James laughed. "Do you even have a Miata?"

"Yes! And tomorrow we'll take a look but tonight, I want to hear about why my son is happier than I've ever seen him."

Sirius flushed slightly. "What do you want to know? I mean, she's...."

"If you say perfect, I'm going to gag and then punch you," James warned.

"She is! And you owe me for 6 years of listening to you go on about Lily who, as I recall, was also perfect."

James laughed. "Fair enough. Muse away."

Now with all eyes on him, Sirius wasn't sure how to begin. How do you describe the person who holds your heart in their hands? Who you trust to hold your heart in their hands?

James sighed. "This happens now. Speechlessness. In fact, I'm not sure they said a word to each for the first hour after they met. Just held hands and stared. Really uncomfortable for the rest of us, I might add."

Sirius glared at James.

"Don't tease your brother, James. He's in love which is a wonderful thing." Fleamont clapped Sirius on the back. "Maybe you could tell me a little bit about her though? Something simple maybe. What house was she in? Does she like quidditch?"

Sirius thought for a moment and then looked up at his father. The only father who ever loved him, ever tried to understand him. "She lights up my soul," he whispered, knowing that Fleamont would understand.

Fleamont breathed out slowly and put his arm around his son, kissing the top of his head. "Then I love her already."

In the kitchen, Euphemia floated wine glasses to land in front of them. "So spill! I want to hear how it all happened." She asked Lily, "did they know it was a set up?"

"I think I was quite subtle. Just a chance meeting with a friend," Lily explained.

"As subtle as a herd of hippogriffs," Aurora corrected. "Not that I'm complaining." She put her hand on Lily's arm. "Honestly, I can't really remember my life without him," she finished softly gazing into her wine glass.

Euphemia smiled and took Aurora's hand. "I've never seen him look happier and when he looks at you...he adores you." She took Lily's hand too and beamed. "My sons chose well and brought me beautiful daughters."

Aurora smiled at Euphemia realizing that it was utterly impossible to feel anything but love for this woman.

"So, dear, you must tell me about yourself," Euphemia insisted. "I'm afraid Lily wasn't much help with that. Where are you from?"

Aurora considered for a moment and then realized that she wanted to tell her true story. "I grew up on the Isle of Iona," she began. "A very, very small village. Just me and my mom."

"Your mom was a wizard or muggle?" Euphemia asked. "Not that it matters, of course. Except my husband will talk your ear off if you're muggle born. Poor Lily...."

Lily laughed. "She is not exaggerating. I never realized how many muggle things I took for granted until I had to explain them to Monty. How should I know how a toaster works?"

They laughed.

"I'm not muggle born," Aurora said. "I'm a Druid. Or half Druid at least. My father was a muggle but I never met him. He...wasn't too interested in being a father and left before I was born."

Euphemia couldn't decide between shock over learning that there were still Druids or heartbreak for this poor fatherless child. She chose the latter and squeezed Aurora's hand. "How sad for you, dear. And so difficult for your mom, I'm sure. I'm so sorry to hear it. Are you and your mom still close?"

"I haven't seen her since I left for Hogwarts actually. I went against their wishes so I wasn't allowed to return," Aurora explained.

Euphemia silently added Aurora's mother to her growing list of "people who have no business being parents" and refilled their glasses. "Well, you have a home to return to now." *****************************************************************

Sirius' bedroom at the Potter House. He led Aurora to the door and then looked a little shy.

"Are we going in?" Aurora asked.

"It's just...the last time I was in this room, I didn't even know you. Didn't know...anything. It feels like someone else's room. A child's room." Babbling nonsense.

Aurora took his hand, opened the door, and led him through it. "That child is still a part of you. He's just had some new experiences." She pushed him back on the bed. "And now this bed is going to have some new experiences."

Sirius laughed and pulled her down on top of him.

*****************************************************************************

Later that night. Sirius and Aurora lay tangled together, face to face, every possible body part touching, still kissing softly in the afterglow.

"This may come as a surprise after all of James' stories but I have not ever done that in this bed," Sirius confessed.

"No girls sneaking in the windows?" Aurora teased.

"A couple tried but it didn't seem right here," Sirius answered gravely. "The Potters took me in when I had no one, nowhere to go. I didn't want to be a burden."

"You never told me why you left home. I mean, I can guess just from bits of what you've said, what James and Lily have said and hinted at....."

"My vile family and their revolting thoughts on muggles isn't enough reason?"

"It is but I feel like there's something more." Aurora saw the pain in Sirius' eyes but continued. "Lily told me that your mother...your biological mother...used to send you horrible howlers." She touched his face gently, stroking the smallest of scars on his cheekbone. "It wasn't just howlers though, was it?"

Sirius lay quietly for a moment and then whispered, "it wasn't the safest place to live." He sighed knowing that she had a right to know. Surprised that he wanted her to know. Even this ugly part of him. He wanted her to know all of him. "It started with the howlers. Gryffindor was not at all okay with them as you might imagine. They would have preferred my death to that which was the gist of the howlers. McGonagall told me later that they actually put quite a bit of pressure on the school to disregard the Sorting Hat and put me in Slytherin but Dumbledore refused."

"Smart man. The Hat got it right, I think. Or you could have been in Ravenclaw. You're smart enough."

"I would have driven you all bonkers back than. My need for entertainment, for action was insatiable. I'm surprised the Gryffindors didn't drown me in the lake."

Aurora laughed.

"So I knew that Christmas break first year was going to be awful. Everyone was all excited to go home and I felt like I was being sentenced to Azkaban for 3 weeks. I wasn't wrong either. It started with just the yelling, basically the same as the howlers but in person. I thought I could just ignore it but even being in Gryffindor for a few months, I'd changed. What was ignorable had become infuriating and I would find myself arguing with them. It was Christmas night when things first turned physical. I don't even recall what I'd said now but my mother snapped and hurled an antique vase at my head. I didn't even see it coming."

Aurora kissed his cheekbone. "This scar?"

"Yes. It would have been worse but James and Remus made me go to Madam Pomfrey when I got back to Hogwarts and she fixed a lot of it."

"You told James and Remus?"

"No. Well, I hadn't intended to. My hair was long even then and I thought I could maybe hide it until it healed."

_Flashback_

_Sirius waited until dinner was over and he was sure everyone would be asleep before he left his hiding place and snuck into the Gryffindor common room. He adjusted his hair to cover his face and continued on stealthily through the common room and up the stairs to his room. He had no idea how he was going to keep this up once classes started tomorrow but one moment at a time as they say. He quietly opened the door to his room and slunk in ready to make a beeline for his bed._

_"Finally! We've been waiting up for you! How was your break? What did you get?" James bounced in front of Sirius all questions and exuberance._

_Sirius lowered his head, making sure his face was covered. "It was fine," he mumbled. "I'm really tired. Going to bed."_

_Remus looked concerned and walked over to Sirius. "What's up with you?"_

_"Nothing's up with me," Sirius snapped and regretted it. His nerves were frayed and edgy but this wasn't going to help him keep his secret. He carefully kept his back to them. "Nothing's up. I'm just tired."_

_Remus grabbed Sirius' shoulder and spun him around._

_"Leave me alone!" Sirius yelled._

_James saw Sirius' face. "What happened to you?"_   
_One side of Sirius' face was a rainbow of blacks, purples, reds, and blues with small cuts sprinkled throughout along with one much larger cut .His eye opened no more than a slit._

_"It's nothing. I walked into a door." Sirius turned around and tried to crawl into bed._

_"Bollocks," Remus said._

_"Absolute bollocks," James said. They sat down on Sirius' bed quickly followed by Peter. "What happened really?"_

_"I ran into something."_

_"You ran into it or it ran into you?" Remus asked gently._

_"You can tell us the truth, Sirius," James said. "We're your best mates. You can tell us anything."_

_Sirius felt tears creeping into his eyes and blinked them back. Weakness. "It's nothing. I'm fine."_

_"I believe we've already called bollocks on that one, mate," James said. "Try again."_

_"Look, we hear the howlers, Sirius, and we're not stupid and you're not clumsy so just tell us what happened," Remus reasoned._

_Sirius sighed. "I ran into a vase. A very large, very old vase."_

_"And this vase was powered by?" Remus asked._

_Sirius sighed knowing they were never going to let this go. "My mother's wand," he said quietly tears welling in his eyes. Stop that._

_The three boys looked at each other unsure what to do. James responded first, putting his arm around Sirius' shoulders. "She doesn't matter. None of them matter." He laid his head against Sirius' head and pretended he didn't hear the other boy crying._

_"James is absolutely right. She's a monster and she doesn't matter. Not at all." Remus said silently fuming that someone should hurt his friend. "We should get you down to Madam Pomfrey though. I think this may be a little worse than you think."_

_Sirius nodded slightly. "It hurts. A lot," he admitted. "I can't see at all. But..." He tried to look at them with his good eye. "Please don't tell her. It'll just make it worse. Just say I ran into something."_

_"Sirius...." James began. "We need to tell an adult..."_

_"I'm not going if you don't promise," Sirius insisted. "Please. Just...it can't get back to them. It'll be worse. Just say I tripped."_

_Remus and James had a meaningful but unspoken conversation and then nodded. "We'll say you fell out of bed but Sirius...this isn't okay," James said softly._

_"I'll be fine. I'm sure it won't happen again," Sirius assured them trying to keep the fear out of his voice._

_End of Flashback_

Aurora continued to stroke his face, his arm, comforting quietly.

"Once I told them, I couldn't seem to keep it together. Like telling them made it real. I guess before that I'd been trying to believe that I really had run into a cupboard door. That was the first night James crawled into my bed. I insisted that it wasn't necessary. I was 12 by then and really....but he wouldn't leave and I was secretly glad because deep down, I was terrified. Of her, of going home, of everything."

Aurora rested her forehead against his and then kissed him gently on the mouth, tears in her eyes for the wounded child inside.

"So it went on that way, getting a little bit worse every break. James and Remus just made sleeping with me right before and after breaks a thing they did without asking. I wanted to tell them not to but...I needed them...." He composed himself. "It was the summer after our fourth year when things started getting really bad."

_FLASHBACK_

_The Black family dining room table was set with the trappings of their riches. Around the table sat Walburga and Orion Black along with Sirius and Regulus. Bellatrix Black with her boyfriend, Rodolphus LeStrange, Narcissa Black, and Cygnus and Druella Black, brother and sister-in-law of Orion and parents of Bellatrix and Narcissa. The dinner was a celebration of Rodolphus'' induction into the Death Eaters and a mere month after his Hogwart's graduation! The family couldn't be prouder especially after suffering the embarrassment of Andromeda Black's marriage to a muggle born last fall. That she had bore the mudblood's child was beyond forgiveness and now Cygnus told everyone (whether they asked or not) that he had only the two daughters._

_Bellatrix and Rodolphus regaled the family with the plans of his new master, Lord Voldemort, or the Dark Lord as they called him with nothing short of absolute reverence. Mudbloods would be registered and "dealt with" according to their status. Perhaps halfbloods as well, suggested Rodolphus. Why stop there? Walburga asked. Some of our very own pure bloods are traitors to the blood._

_Sirius stayed utterly focused on his plate, willing his ears not to relay information to his brain and if that failed, willing his mouth not to accept instructions from same said brain. Perhaps if he just thought about Quidditch. Quidditch scores. Yes. I'll recite Quidditch scores in my head and then my brain will be occupied and stay out of trouble. Chudley Cannons 50, Holyoke Harpies 40....._

_"Regulus, do you think you'll be joining the Death Eaters as well?" Druella asked him politely as Kreacher poured more wine._

_Appleby Arrows 80, Falmouth Falcons 60...._

_"I'll only be starting my fourth year...." Regulus said hoping to divert the question._

_"Of course, dear. You can't join until you're 18 but it's never too soon to start associating with the right people," Walburga said. "We've certainly had enough associating with the WRONG people in this family," she said glaring at her older son._

_Sirius continued to stare at his plate. Perhaps a listing of magical herbs? Asphodel root, dried netties....._

_"I do understand your pain, Walburga," Druella said kindly. "You do everything you can to raise your children to be people you can be proud of but then it only takes one bad seed."_

_"Sometimes the seed needs to be destroyed to protect the rest of the garden," Cygnus said equally kindly._

_Dittany, wormwood...._

_"I know it's not the popular thing to say," Walburga said, "...but I blame Dumbledore and most of the Hogwarts' professors. They're brainwashing those poor children with these ideas that mudbloods are equal to us. It's laughable."_

_"Hogwarts has certainly slipped since the days when we were there," Orion agreed. "Of course, we were all in the right house receiving a proper education."_

_Mandrake root, hate, aconite, them...._

_"It makes an enormous difference, of course, but not even Slytherin is protection from the baser elements of the school. Mudbloods just running around the halls, taking classes with OUR children," Druella said. "We've seen the results firsthand."_

_Cygnus glared at her. "We will never speak of that again. She is dead. She no longer exists."_

_Druella flinched ever so slightly but obeyed._

_"And a child as well with that...creature," Walburga continued, stirring the pot. "I've heard that there is something wrong with the child. She is a metamorphmagus of all things."_

_"Proof that pure blood should not be sullied with muggle blood," Orion said._

_Fuck, fuck, fuck...._

_"I don't believe we can discount the inherent dangers even in half blood and pure blood families who have chosen to betray their blood by allowing mudblood marriages," Bellatrix said. She turned to Sirius and continued pointedly, "families like the Potters for instance...they claim to trace back to the Peverells but their name is clearly a mudblood name. If you ask me, pureblood families who choose to side with the mudbloods should be treated like the mudbloods," she said and then smiled sweetly at Sirius. "What say you, cousin?"_

_Fucking bitch._

_Regulus and Narcissa slouched instinctively in their chairs, no strangers to what was coming._

_"What's wrong, Sirius? Wolf got your tongue?" Bellatrix baited._

_Sirus gave in and took the bait. "What say I? I think a thousand years of inbreeding has made you a daft cow, you fucking bitch. James Potter is worth a thousand of you and your disgusting, bigoted pureblood...bollocks! Andromeda was the lucky one because she doesn't have to be a part of this revolting family any more!" He threw back his chair and stormed out the door. He didn't make it through the drawing room before he heard his mother behind him._

_"Sirius Orion Black! You are a horrible, awful, ungrateful, embarrassment of a child! Isn't it bad enough that everyone knows that you were sorted into Gryffindor? You have to humiliate me and your father every chance you get! You are an abomination to the Black name!"_

_Sirius finally turned to face her. "I hate the Black name! I hate it! I hate this house! I hate everything you stand for! You're embarrassed by me? How the hell do you think I feel when people ask my last name???? You know, I don't even volunteer it!"_

_"CRUCIO!" Walburga screamed, her face white with rage, her eyes blazing with hate._

_Sirius looked at her absolutely stunned for a second before the excruciating pain took hold, dropping him to the floor._

_"CRUCIO! CRUCIO! COMMINUETA OSSA!"_

_Sirius didn't believe it was possible but the excruciating pain was getting worse. He knew he was crying and hated himself for it but his nerves felt like they were being burnt and his bones felt like they were breaking. They WERE breaking. He could hear them breaking through his sobs and his mother's continued screams._

_"CRUCIO! COMMINUETA OSSA!"_

_Sirius was vaguely aware of other people entering the drawing room though he couldn't see them. He felt dizziness and nausea along with the endless pain, saw black spots growing larger at the periphery of his vision._

_"Mother, please stop! You're killing him!"_

_Was that Regulus yelling? Sirius wasn't sure any more. He wasn't sure of anything any more as the blackness overtook him._

_......._

_Sirius woke up briefly to the sensation of movement. He'd never been in this much pain, never even knew this much pain existed._

_......._

_A face hovered over Sirius' face. "He's awake sort of. Oi mate, where are you headed?"_

_Sirius didn't understand the question._

_"Where do you want to go?" the face asked again._

_"James..."_

_"James who? Or is that a where?"_

_"Potter..." Sirius felt the blackness suffocate him once again._

_.............._

_Sirius woke up again. Outside in the rain. Alone. He tried to focus on his surroundings, tried to ignore his screaming body. He was on a front porch, in front of a door. He tried to pull himself up but his broken legs gave way under his weight and he fell against the door whacking his head hard against it. He felt the blackness come again and welcomed it._

_..........._

_"Sirius!" James yelled. "MOM! DAD! I NEED YOU NOW!!!!" He was screaming. Terrified. "Sirius, wake up! Please just open your eyes." He cradled Sirius' head in his lap rain pouring down on them. 'MOM! DAD! PLEASE!" he screamed again desperately._

_Fleamont ran down the stairs with Euphemia on his heels. "James! James, what's wrong? What's happened? Where are you?"_

_"Out here, Dad! Please hurry!" James felt tears stinging his eyes. "Sirius, please wake up. Please wake up."_

_Fleamont found them on the front porch drenched in rain. James had a death grip on Sirius' lifeless broken body. "Mia! Out here! Now!"_

_Euphemia ran quickly to join them and then stopped suddenly in horror at the scene on the porch. Her horror lasted only a moment and then her years of medical training kicked in. "Monty, we need to get him inside. Move him as little as possible. Mobilicorpus if you can manage it. I see a lot of broken bones. He could have spine or neck trauma which is much harder to fix. VERY carefully, Monty."_

_Fleamont complied, gray faced with worry and absolute focus in moving the injured boy without so much as a jostle._

_"James! Go get my bag! It's in the hall cupboard upstairs," Euphemia ordered._

_James stared straight ahead, clearly in shock._

_"JAMES! NOW!" Euphemia yelled at him which seemed to snap him out of it._

_James turned and ran up the stairs to get the bag._

_"On the table, Monty." Euphemia ran in front of them, clearing the table with a swipe of her wand. "Lumos!" Kitchen lights popped on obediently. What she saw in full light was even worse than she had feared._

_Fleamont gently set Sirius on the kitchen table. "How did this happen?" Always the auror, always needing answers._

_"We can find that out later. First, he's badly hurt," Euphemia said as she examined Sirius' injuries._

_James came running in with the bag and some blankets. "I thought he might be cold," James said quietly, helplessly. He looked at his best friend, bones broken through the skin, blood everywhere and felt his stomach turn into knots. He thought he might be sick with fear. "Is he going to be okay?"_

_"I'm going to do everything I can, son," Euphemia assured him._

_"James..." Sirius said his voice barely above a whisper. It hurt to talk, hurt to breathe, hurt to exist. "James..."_

_"I'm right here," James said and moved so that he was standing beside Sirius' head where Sirius could see him. "Right here. Mum's going to fix you up. It'll be okay." He wanted to touch him, to reassure him but he couldn't find anywhere that wasn't broken. He put his hand gently on Sirius' shoulder and left it there when it didn't seem to make things worse._

_"Can you help him?" Fleamont asked Euphemia very quietly so that the boys couldn't hear._

_"I can but..."_

_"But what?"_

_"This spell that broke his bones reset them as well but they're reset all wrong so I'll have to break them again."_

_Fleamont shuddered at the thought of that level of pain. "Can't he be unconscious?" he asked._

_"At St Mungo's, yes, but on our kitchen table? Not really something I'm prepared to manage," Euphemia said._

_"No....not St. Mungo's..." Sirius croaked. "Please no...they'll find me there."_

_"Who will find you there?" Fleamont asked. "Who did this to you?"_

_"The interrogation can wait, Monty," Euphemia said._

_"I'm not sure it can if he thinks someone's still after him," Fleamont responded._

_"You have to tell them, Sirius," James pled. "You have to tell. I know you don't want anyone to know, that it'll be worse but...but..." he couldn't seem to look at Sirius without crying. There was so much blood and his leg bone was popping out. "How much worse can it get?"_

_"Whoever did this to you and I'm beginning to develop an educated guess, I can protect you from them, Sirius. You have to believe that, " Fleamont said gently._

_"You can't... No one can." Sirius whispered_

_James looked back and forth between his father and his best friend trying to decide who was right. "It was his parents!" James cried. "They've been doing it for years though not this bad but he thought they would be worse if he told so we take him to Madam Pomfrey and tell her stories but I don't think she believes it and McGonagall doesn't believe it but we didn't know what else to do!"_

_Sirius stared at James terrified._

_"I'm sorry, Sirius, but this isn't a black eye or a broken wrist! And my dad's an auror. Maybe he CAN protect you."_

_"You know who my parents are," Sirius said quietly. "No one can protect me."_

_"I WILL protect you," Fleamont said savagely. "If they want to ever come within a mile of you again, it'll be over my dead body."_

_Sirius thought that a likely outcome. No one could really help him._

_"If we're staying here, then I should get started before the bones get any more set. Sirius, dear..."_

_"It's okay, Mrs. Potter," Sirius said quietly. "I know you don't mean to hurt me."_

_Euphemia felt her heart breaking for this broken boy who lay on the table trying so hard to be stoic as she rebroke and reset practically every bone in his body. She could barely see what she was doing through her tears._

_James and Fleamont dutifully held Sirius down through the entire process but neither could watch the horrific proceeding. It was too much to bear. With each bone he heard crack, Fleamont resolved to take this child away from the Blacks whatever it took. He and Euphemia would assume custody, of course. He'd involve Dumbledore. That would be a good start. He had mostly strong support in the Wizengamot which may be needed under these circumstances. And if that wasn't enough...he wasn't sure what his back up plan was yet but he wasn't going to break his promise to protect Sirius no matter where that led._

_It was nearly dawn by the time Euphemia had reset the bones and healed the cuts. Fleamont had carefully transferred Sirius upstairs into the guest room. James followed him up still looking grave._

_Fleamont gently lowered Sirius to the bed and started to cover him with a blanket but even the weight of the blanket made him wince so he took it off. "I'm not sure how we would manage pajamas....."_

_"It's okay," Sirius said quietly. His ribs felt a bit better and he could almost talk without additional pain if he didn't speak very loudly._

_Euphemia walked in with two vials of potions. She handed Sirius the Skelegrow first and he tried to take it but his hands were too broken._

_"Sorry, dear. Here, let me," Euphemia carefully poured the liquid into his mouth. "Now this one. It'll help you sleep." She kissed Sirius on the forehead gently. "You're safe here with us, dear."_

_Fleamont carefully patted Sirius' shoulder on his way to the door. "We're going to take care of this, son. I'll protect you."_

_Fleamont and Euphemia stopped at the door. "James, 5 minutes and then go to your room. He needs to rest," Euphemia told her son._

_James waited until he could hear them in their own bedroom and then closed the guest room door and crawled into bed next to Sirius. "Nox," he murmured and rolled onto his side to face Sirius. "Are you mad that I told?"_

_"No. I just don't think it'll help. I'll have to go back there."_

_"You won't. We'll run away if it comes to that."_

_"What about the trace? They'll find us."_

_"We'll figure something out. I'm not letting you go back there, Sirius. Not ever. I'll send Remus and Peter an owl in the morning and we'll figure something out."_

_"S'okay...s'luv..." Sirius' words became unintelligible as the sleeping draught took effect._

_James laid his head next to Sirius' on the pillow careful not to touch any broken bones and listened to his best friend breathing. Making sure that the breathing continued. He was still listening as the sun crept over the horizon and then higher and higher into the sky._

_It was afternoon before Sirius awoke. He tried to shift positions and was met with pain from everywhere and James' hands trying to restrain him._

_"Don't move, don't move," James said trying to hold him still without making anything worse. "Just stay still."_

_Sirius looked at James trying to figure out how he got to the Potters, why he was in so much pain, why James looked like hell and then it slowly came back to him. The dinner, the argument, the crucio, and then things got foggier. The Knight Bus? Rain? The Potters..._

_Euphemia knocked on the door and came in with some soup and more potions. "You're awake," she said trying to keep her voice light. "Good morning, dears." She gave both boys a kiss on the head. "How are you feeling?" she asked Sirius._

_"Better," Sirius said automatically._

_"Liar," Euphemia said. "But you will. Just give it a few days, sweetheart. You'll need another dose of Skele-grow and then James, can you feed him some soup? Dumbledore will be here momentarily and I'll need to talk to him."_

_"Sure, Mum," James said taking the bowl from her._

_Sirius dutifully let Euphemia pour the potion down his throat cringing at how awful it tasted._

_"Soup and then rest understand?" Euphemia looked pointedly at both of them._

_"Okay mom," James said. "I mean, I was thinking we might play some Quidditch this afternoon, but...."_

_Euphemia rolled her eyes, kissed Sirius on the cheek, and left._

_"You should be nicer to her," Sirius said._

_"She knows I was joking," James said. "Now open wide! The broomstick's coming in for a landing!"_

_Sirius glared at James but did as he was told. Humiliation trumped starvation._

_An hour later, the soup bowl had been emptied and wizard chess set up on the bed._

_"You're half dead and still beating me," James whined. "How is that possible?"_

_"The only surprise is that you continue to doubt my brilliant strategic mind," Sirius said. "Checkmate."_

_"WHAT? WHERE? FUCK!" James cried. "I didn't even see you coming over there."_

_There was a knock at the door and Dumbledore and McGonagall entered._

_The boys instinctively looked alarmed. Generally no good happened when you had your head of house AND the headmaster in front of you._

_Dumbledore laughed reading the fear on their faces. "No, no, Mr. Potter, Mr. Black. For once, it would seem you're not the perpetrators of the wrongdoing."_

_"A momentous occasion no doubt deserving of a bank holiday," McGonagall drawled._

_"So I think you know why we're here, Sirius." Dumbledore sat carefully on the edge of the bed taking stock of Sirius' condition without looking away from the boy's eyes._

_Sirius nodded. "Mr. Potter wants to take me away from my parents but you can't let him!"_

_Dumbledore looked surprised. "You wish to return to your parents?"_   
_"NO! No, no but..." Sirius groaned realizing that moving at all even whilst delivering an impassioned speech caused great pain. "They'll make me go back no matter what and I don't want James' dad to be hurt because of me."_

_McGonagall felt tears in her throat but strove to keep her face impassive._

_"I see. That is sound reasoning. Your family is certainly not to be trifled with, I agree, but I believe it may be time for you to let the adults worry about this situation. Mr. Potter has been an auror for 35 years now and I feel fairly confident he can take care of himself. Certainly better than a 15 year old boy can."_

_"I'm almost 16," Sirius said._

_"Oh yes, of course," Dumbledore agreed. "But 16 is still in need of a guardian and a safe place to live and I agree with Mr. and Mrs. Potter in that Grimmauld Place is not at all a safe place for you. In this regard, Mr. Potter and I will be paying a visit to your parents this afternoon to explain that you will be changing residences to this house effective immediately."_

_"I would live here?" Sirius asked daring to hope for just a moment._

_"If that is acceptable to you, the Potters would very much like to become your legal guardians."_

_"You're sure I'm not putting them in danger?" Sirius asked quietly._

_"I am sure," Dumbledore said. "James, perhaps you could accompany me and your father to Grimmauld Place to pick up Sirius' belongings?"_

_"Sure," James said._

_"No...." Sirius said._

_"He'll be perfectly safe, I promise," Dumbledore assured Sirius._

_Sirius thought of the house elf heads on the walls, the wall to wall dark objects, the evil that seeped from the carpets like thick fog. It wasn't just James' safety. He'd hoped that James would never see the full nature of what his family was._

_"After what I saw last night, nothing can shock me, Sirius," James said reading his mind as usual._

_Sirius sighed and motioned for James to come closer. "Floorboards under the bed are loose," he whispered._

_"Got it," James said standing and following Dumbledore to the door._

_"As for you, Mr. Black," McGonagall said sitting in the chair James had just departed. "...I hear you're a bit of a chess prodigy. Care to make it interesting?" she smirked._

_Sirius laughed and then winced. "10 galleons?"_

_"Let's make it 20," McGonagall said smiling at him._

_Five hours and four chess games all played to draws later, Sirius, McGonagall, and Euphemia were having tea or in Sirius' case, trying to. Having failed to use his hands, he was using wandless magic to guide the biscuits and tea cup to his mouth while McGonagall pretended not to be impressed._

_James entered the room levitating Sirius' trunk in front of him. He dropped it on the floor and carefully crawled up on the bed helping himself to the biscuits floating in the air._

_"How did it go?" Sirius asked._

_"I believe all your belongings are accounted for except I couldn't figure out your sticking charms so the walls remained behind."_

_"Good," Sirius almost laughed at the thought of his mother trying to pry the Gryffindor pennants and muggle girl posters off his wall._

_Dumbledore and Fleamont walked in shortly after James._

_Sirius was afraid to ask. Their faces were inscrutable._

_"How did it go?" Euphemia asked._

_"Ah quite well actually. They were hesitant at first but once they realized how horrible it would be to have another public scandal on the heels of Andromeda Black marrying that muggle born, they were much more receptive to a peaceful resolution," Dumbledore explained._

_"How would it have been a public scandal?" Sirius asked._

_"Well, the auror's office is involved now, isn't it?" Fleamont winked at him. "...and I have to say our office is always accidentally leaking things to the Daily Prophet."_

_"So it's really over? I can stay here?" Sirius asked unable to believe it._

_Euphemia gently sat down on the bed beside Sirius and put her forehead against his. "You're our son now, Sirius."_

_END OF FLASHBACK_

"So they've been my family ever since. Not just guardians though even that would have been life saving...but truly my mum and dad. I don't think I really even understood what those words meant before I came to live here. Words like mom, dad, love, didn't exist in the Black vocabulary."

"They've been very kind to me and I already love them but now...I think they're brilliant."

"They're pretty pleased with you too," Sirius smiled and kissed her. "Me too."

********************************************************************************************************

Early Christmas morning. Sirius woke slowly instinctively reaching for Aurora and pulling her closer.

Aurora woke and nuzzled Sirius' neck still sleepy. "Happy Christmas, love."

"Happy Christmas," Sirius murmured burying his face in her hair.

"I want to give you something but it's not exactly a thing," Aurora tried to explain.

"Is it..." Sirius kissed her deeply.

"No! You can have that whenever you want it," Aurora smiled at him suggestively. "This is magic. Blood magic but not dark magic."

"What does it do?"

"It binds us so if one of us is lost, we can find the other one."

Sirius rested his head against her forehead. "I would very much like that. Losing you is not an option."

"For me either," Aurora murmured.

"What do we do? Other than provide blood...."

Aurora got up and walked to the desk.

Sirius admired her naked body in the pre-dawn light. Felt himself growing hard. Not now.... He got up and followed her to the desk, watching as she laid out various herbs into a shape he hadn't seen before.

Aurora picked up a knife and cut her left hand, letting the blood drop over the herbs. She took Sirius' right hand, cut it and let the blood comingle with her own. The herbs and blood began to glow a soft blue. She picked up the herbs in her left hand and clasped her hand to Sirius' right hand. "Bho dà aon cheangail shiorruidh." They watched as the blue glow attached to their skin drawing a pattern on their clasped hands and their wrists to form a sort of magical tattoo.

"It's beautiful," Sirius murmured. He moaned a bit as the magic hit him. "It feels beautiful." He felt himself grow harder. Good Merlin, not now!

Aurora reached out with her tattooed hand and stroked him softly. She felt his pleasure as if it were her own. She then guided his tattooed hand to stroke her and laughed softly as his eyes flew open. "An interesting side effect," she explained. "I feel what you feel and you feel what I feel."

Sirius found himself struggling to breathe as she pressed against him. "That's...a...very...interesting...side...effect," he stammered.

"Let's find out how interesting." Aurora led him to the bed and laid him down on it. She climbed on top of him and put him inside her and gasped at how good it felt. She rode him, touching herself, feeling her orgasm coming.

"Oh my...it feels like that..." Sirius moaned as she came. "Mmmm...." He rolled over on top of her, thrusting into her, kissing her, feeling her pleasure mixing with his own. He came and she gasped at the pleasure of it. She felt herself coming again a ricochet. They finally collapsed on top of each other breathing heavily.

"A very interesting side effect," Sirius gasped.

"There are some telepathic benefits as well but I thought you might like to see that particular side effect demonstrated." She moaned as an aftershock hit.

Sirius looked surprised. "This keeps happening?"

"Just for a bit."

"Bloody amazing," he moaned as another aftershock hit. "You may need to explain the telepathy again a bit later."

  
***********************************************************************************************

Sirius laid on his side breathing her in, knowing that he could stay like this forever. "Marry me," he whispered.

"Yes," she whispered.

They lay in silence. They were beyond words. Perhaps always had been.

"I'm going to ask properly, by the way," Sirius said. "But it's good to know what the answer will be."

Aurora looked at him and smiled. "You've known from the first moment we met what the answer would be, love."

**********************************************************************************

Euphemia sipped her tea and watched the snow fall from the window seat in the sitting room. The house was quiet, peaceful. Her family still sleeping. She heard someone come in and turned to see Sirius.

"Happy Christmas, Mum," Sinus said, kissing her cheek and joining her on the window seat.

"Happy Christmas, indeed," Euphemia said smiling at him. "Aurora still sleeping?"

Sirius nodded. "She is."

"She's absolutely lovely. I'm so happy for you," Euphemia said.

"Worked better than you thought, huh? Your evil plan," Sirius teased.

"I see Lily didn't do a very good job of keeping my secret," Euphemia smirked. "Were you really upset about it?"

Sirius shook his head. "I didn't think...that it was possible. I thought I'd lost that chance to find someone. I didn't care when I had the chance and then Azkaban and then I died...."

"Love will out as they say," Euphemia said.

"Aurora says it's fate or prophecy, I guess is the word she'd use. She had a recurring dream for years about the section of Forbidden Forest that Lily found her in," Sirius explained. "She says prophecy. I think I would have said coincidence but...something about this...about us...has felt beyond my control from the first moment I met her."

"She is a Druid. She may perceive things differently though I have to say Divination class seemed a little unlikely to me," Euphemia admitted.

"James and I laughed through the entire class. Seemed like complete bollocks. But there are real prophecies. James and Lily died because of that prophecy about Harry and Aurora insists that we were all Druids once. I don't know. I guess it doesn't matter why we're together only that we are and it's one of the best things that has ever happened to me."

Euphemia smiled at Sirius. "I couldn't be happier for you."

*****************************************************************

Aurora walked into the kitchen and found Fleamont making tea.

"Hello dear," Fleamont said and smiled at her. "Spot of tea?"

"That would be lovely. Cheers," Aurora said. "Can I help?"

"I believe I've got it," Fleamont said. "Incendio." Two tea cups obediently boiled and then floated themselves to the kitchen table.

Aurora and Fleamont sat down across from each and in front of their cups.

"Sirius tells me that you were an auror," Aurora said. "With your father's business...."

"Yes, I had planned to follow in my father's footsteps and do still dabble in potions but when I graduated from Hogwarts, it was to a world that was changing and not for the better. The Muggles were fighting their second world war and a lot of wizards were listening very carefully to what Grindelwald was saying.... It just seemed like I could find a better way to be of use than making hair potions. So I took the auror test and it turned out to be a job that I quite loved."

Aurora smiled. "I see where James and Sirius get it from."

"I'm almost afraid to ask," Fleamont said with a smile.

"The way they see the world. That it's their responsibility to stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves. That it's on their shoulders to fight evil like Voldemort."

"I'm not sure if I deserve credit for that but I am proud of both of them. Not just because they joined the Order of the Phoenix or because they fought Death Eaters but because they both strive to make the right choice even when that choice isn't always instinctive for either one of them. They've grown up to be good men. And to attract good women," Fleamont smiled at Aurora. "You're so good for him. After everything...it warms my heart to see him like this. It's not always easy for him...there are...."

Aurora smiled at Fleamont. "I know," she said softly. "He'll be okay now."

"I believe he will."

***********************************************************************************************

The Potter sitting room looked like a Christmas wonderland with multiple trees sparkling, a fire roaring, garland and tinsel twinkling, hot chocolate and Christmas biscuits.

Sirius sat in a chair by the fire with Aurora in his lap, her head resting on his head. He was sure that this was what absolute peace felt like. His parents sat across from them on the couch holding hands. James and Lily sat on the floor in front of the fire wrapped in a blanket. Everyone he loved in this warm, beautiful room. Well, not everyone. Not Remus and not Harry. "I have a present for you for Christmas," he said to James and Lily and got up gently shuffling Aurora off his lap.

"When did he have time to shop?" Lily asked. "We're always with him."

"It's not exactly that kind of gift," Aurora said.

Sirius returned with a large box and a smaller box and set them in front of James and Lily. "It's really for all four of you though."

James opened the large box and pulled out a pensieve.

Lily opened the small box and pulled out a vial. She looked questioningly at Sirius.

"Pour it in," Sirius instructed.

LIly poured the vial into the pensieve and suddenly all six of them were transported back in time....

~ Harry running away from home  
~ Harry playing Quidditch  
~ Harry in the Shrieking Shack  
~ Harry on the hippogriff  
~ Every letter Sirius had received or written to Harry  
~ Harry in the cave  
~ Every flue conversation Sirius had ever had with Harry  
~ Every moment at Grimmauld Place with Harry  
~ The prophecy room and Sirius' last glimpse of Harry as he fell through the veil

They re-emerged from the pensieve with tears in their eyes.

"I'd spent so much time with him and you'd miss all of it. I just wanted to give that to you," Sirius explained as Lily tackled him in a bear hug. James hugged them both.

"That was the best gift ever," James said quietly.

"Absolutely the best," Fleamont agreed.

"Beautiful," Euphemia murmured hugging Sirius. "Just beautiful."

**************************************  
Hot chocolates gave way to warm butterbeers and mini-trips into the pensieve and endless questions for Sirius when context was required or people identified.

"Remus does look sick," James said. "Do you think he's still living at Grimmauld Place? I just wish I knew that someone was taking care of him."

"I think he might let Molly and Arthur help. And Dora will help regardless of what he wants," Sirius said.

"I love her!" Lily said. "She's perfect for him. The most frustrating thing about this pensieve is not being able to tell him what a complete git he's being."

"I told him daily," Sirius moaned. "...to no avail."

"So Aurora, did your family have a big Christmas?" Euphemia asked. "Or maybe not...Druid...."

"We didn't really. Druid, right. Hogwarts did, of course, and it became one of my favorite holidays. I love all the lights and music and that sense of anticipation," Aurora said. "The way the Great Hall was decorated was always so idyllic."

"It's my favorite too," Sirius said. "Well, it is now anyway. In this house."

Euphemia smiled lovingly at him. "Finally someone else in this house who appreciates my holiday efforts."

"Dad and I appreciate your efforts!" James protested. "Maybe not in the same absolutely insane way that Sirius does but who would?"

"I think the house looks magical," Aurora smiled. "I don't think I've ever been anywhere that felt so much like a home."

Euphemia beamed at her.

"Me neither," Sirius said snuggling Aurora close to him.

"Is this Christmas last year?" Lily asked her face half in the pensieve. "Did you actually decorate that mausoleum of a house?"

"I hadn't planned to since it was supposed to just be me and Remus. Figured we would decorate with empty firewhiskey bottles."

James laughed briefly before he realized just how depressing that was.

"But then Arthur got hurt - Voldemort's snake got him -- and he had to go to St. Mungos so the Weasleys and Harry and Hermione all came to Grimmauld Place so they could be close by and I figured...'tis the season? The only happy Christmas that house has ever seen."

Euphemia glanced sadly at Fleamont and he nodded. What if they'd done something to get custody of Sirius earlier? It's not like they hadn't suspected before that fateful night. It was a regret that they would share for eternity.


	14. Diagon Alley

James and Sirius wandered through Diagon Alley peering into shop windows. They both got sidetracked by Quality Quidditch Supplies. 

"Do you think Harry has one of those now?" James asked looking at the broom in the window.

"I would hope so. Look at it!" Sirius frowned. "He's kind of frugal though. Maybe not. I wonder if there's some way we can buy it and make it switch dimensions or whatever this is...."

"That seems unlikely. It's a one way road to get here." James put his arm around Sirius and guided him across to a Goblin silversmith. "We're here on other business anyway...in case, you'd forgotten."

"Proposing to Aurora? Definitely haven't forgotten," Sirius smiled. "I'm kind of nervous about this."

"Afraid she'll change her mind?" James teased.

"No! Yes." Sirius looked panic stricken. "What if she does?"  
"She won't," James assured him. "Unless you pick a horrible ring, of course. Then all bets are off," he grinned.

"You're an arsehole." Sirius slugged James playfully on the arm as they entered the shop. The goblin looked up at them as if dirt had walked in of its own accord. "May I help you?" the goblin sneered. 

"My banker at Gringotts said that I could make a transaction here and you'd handle the transfer from my vault. I'm Sirius Black." 

The goblin's demeanor changed immediately to one of respect. "Mr. Black, yes. Welcome to my humble shop. How may I be of service today?"

Another customer gasped as Sirius said his name and quickly hurried out of the shop. 

"I would like to have wedding rings made but with a specific design." Sirius pulled out a surprisingly artful drawing of what he wanted. Druid symbols around the band with a blue diamond in the middle. 

The goblin took the drawing. "Oh yes. Quite beautiful and quite...old. We can do this for you." The goblin pulled out a hunk of silver. "Perhaps in this?"

Sirius shook his head. "Where's the real stuff?"

The goblin bowed his head. "I apologize, Mr. Black. Of course, I was foolish. A thousand apologies...." 

Sirius sighed realizing what had to be done. His tone changed to ice as he looked down at the goblin. "Don't forget who you're dealing with...sir," he sneered.

The goblin blanched and all but ran to the back of the store to find something appropriate. 

James laughed. "Did you enjoy that?"

"Not at all." 

"Sometimes I forget the weight and fear that the Ancient and Noble House of Black carries. I have to say your quidditch PJs our first year sort of ruined the mystique for me." 

Sirius laughed. "I loved those pajamas." 

The goblin returned with a different hunk of silver. This one seemed to glow. 

"Much better. I'll pick it up at the end of the day." 

The goblin nodded bowing and backing away from him. 

"Can we go look in the quidditch shop now?" James begged. "Just because Harry can't have that new broom doesn't mean I can't!" 

Sirius laughed and followed James out into the street. They were surprised to see several wizards gathered outside the door waiting for them. 

"Murderer!" 

"Traitor!"

The handful of wizards seemed to be turning into an angry mob with that anger directed toward Sirius. 

"How can you stand to be in his presence, Potter, after what he did to you?"  
"Psychopath!"

"Filth!"

"What do you expect from a Black?" 

Sirius stood absolutely still as if he'd been stupefied. 

James was furious. "None of you know what you're talking about! He wasn't the secret keeper! It was Peter Pettigrew who betrayed us!"

The crowd mumbled amongst themselves. Not sure they believed James. Spoiling for a good fight.

"He died protecting my son!" James yelled. 

"Murderer!" 

"Traitor!"

Sirius turned ashen, shaking. 

James grabbed Sirius' arm and apparated them both home.

Aurora and Fleamont looked up startled from their game of wizard chess. Lily and Euphemia popped their heads out of the kitchen.   
"You're back already?" Lily asked.

"There were...issues." James looked warily at Sirius. He was definitely going to explode but whether it was going to be anger, sadness or both, he wasn't sure. He was absolutely sure that yelling "run for cover" wasn't going to help though it may be everyone's best option at this point. 

Aurora stood up and took Sirius' hand but he looked past her. Not seeing any of them. "Sirius, look at me. What happened?" she asked gently.

Sirius pulled his hand away from Aurora and apparated leaving the five of them behind. 

Aurora turned to James. "What the hell happened?" 

"You know how he went to Azakaban for a crime he didn't commit?"

Aurora nodded her eyes darkening. "Yes."

"Turns out we're the only ones who believe he didn't commit it." 

Lily gasped. 

"It was horrible. I tried to explain but they wouldn't even listen to me. Just kept yelling these horrible things at him. I got him out as soon as I could..." James finished helplessly. "Not soon enough."

"That poor boy," Euphemia murmured tears in her eyes, feeling her son's pain. 

Fleamont put his arm around her comforting her.

"But you can find him, right, Aurora? With the tattoos?" Lily asked.

"I can if he wants to be found...." Aurora touched her wrist and shook her head. "Nothing." 

"James, where would he go?" Lily asked. "There has to be somewhere you can think of. Where has he gone before?"

James thought for a moment. "It's not really like him to run away. When he gets like that, it was everyone else who found a hiding place."

"The cave," Aurora said suddenly. "In the Forbidden Forest. He lived there for most of a year and considered it a home. I'll check there."

"We'll look as well, dear. We'll find him," Fleamont assured her.

Aurora apparated to the ground outside the cave, climbed to the opening and crawled through. Sirius was sitting in the far corner staring darkly at the cave wall. She walked over to him and sat down beside him. 

"I hope you weren't planning to take up hide and seek as a career because this took me like 60 seconds to figure out." 

"You shouldn't be here."

"Where else would I be?"   
"Anywhere but here. Finding someone who isn't broken...a pariah...guilty."

Aurora forced Sirius to look at her. "I love you more than I can even find words for but I'm not going to let you wallow in this pity party you're throwing in here. You were broken, yes, but you've rebuilt yourself which after the before life you lived shows extraordinary strength and courage. You may be a pariah to some ill informed wizards who believe everything they read in the Daily Prophet but everyone in this world and the other who MATTER know the truth. As to guilty...: she sighed. "I wish I could charm this away for you. Find some combination of roots and herbs that would heal it but it's not that kind of injury. You need to forgive yourself and I can't do that for you. I can, however, sit beside you..." she took his hand, "holding your hand and loving you for eternity and I plan to." 

"I love you."

"I know." She kissed him softly and then put his tattooed wrist to her own. 

Sirius looked at her in surprise as her emotions, her feelings about him poured into his soul. "How...."

"Another odd side effect. One that I hadn't been quite brave enough to point out until now," Aurora admitted. 

"You feel all that?" Sirius asked, overwhelmed with emotion. He touched their wrists again and let her see how he felt. All of it. The love, the pain, the good, the bad, the light, the dark. He saw the tears rolling down her cheeks. Was it too much?

"I love you, Sirius Black. All of you." She kissed him slowly needing to be with him. 

Sirius used what focus he could muster to conjure a blanket that he laid her down on. Clothes vanished until there was nothing left between them.


	15. Faerie Dancers

"James! If you're not going to do it right, then I'll do it myself," Sirius grumbled.

"I am doing it right," James insisted, levitating thousands of fairy lights into the trees in the Forbidden Forest.

"They're all bunched together. It has to be..."

"If you say perfect, I'm going to strangle you with these things!"

"...unequalled, consummate, ideal, beyond compare, accomplished, splendid..."

"You memorized a thesaurus just to annoy me?"

Sirius shrugged.

"Good one," James laughed.

"Do you think it's too much?" Sirius asked nervously.

"Yes but she'll love it because she loves you," James said. "You're really sweating this, huh?"  
"I just want..." Sirius stopped himself from saying perfect. "...sometimes I don't understand why she loves me and...."

"Stop," James said quietly. "She loves you for the same reason we all love you and I sort of get why you don't understand that because of those arseholes you grew up with but you trust me, right?"

"Completely," Sirius said.

"Then can you trust me on this?" James asked. "You are lovable and you deserve good things to happen to you. Maybe even more than everyone else does because so many bad things have happened to you. Can you just accept that? That she, that we all, love you and that you deserve happiness?"

Sirius nodded slowly. He wanted to believe what James was saying. To feel it inside him. To not have doubts. "I want to accept it," he said softly. 

"I guess that's something," James said. "For now."

****************************************************

Fairy lights twinkled in the trees of the Forbidden Forest. The foliage glowed with soft blue light. The wind itself seemed to whisper in quiet harmony like a symphony. Sirius stood nervously under the trees second guessing everything. Would it be too cold? Maybe this was cheesy? It was cheesy! What could he have been thinking? Fairy lights? Why didn't James put a stop to this? And then Aurora appeared, blonde hair flowing over winter white robes, her cheeks pink with the chill in the February air and he forgot to breathe. She seemed to float toward him and he couldn't think how he'd come to be here in this moment. He swallowed hard as she neared him and took his hands. 

"Beautiful," Aurora murmured.

Sirius stared at her as speechless as the first day they met. She's the silencing spell he thought. When she's here, I can be quiet. I can feel peace. He leaned his forehead against hers. They stood for what could have been eternity just being together in the moment. A gust of cold wind blew through the forest and Aurora shivered. Sirius put his arms around her, the spell broken. "I should have chosen somewhere warmer."

"No, this is perfect," Aurora smiled and snuggled against him. "We'll keep each other warm." 

"Dance with me," Sirius whispered in her ear.

"There's no music," Aurora murmured shivering at his breath on her earlobe.

The sounds of the forest came to life, creating their own symphony with the wind. 

"Isn't there?" Sirius asked as they swayed slowly together, kissing gently, lost in each other. 

The clouds shifted above them revealing the greens and purples and pinks of Aurora Borealis and Aurora gasped. "How did you manage that?""Aurora Borealis. Oh it IS cheesy! I knew...." Sirius panicked.

Aurora silenced him with a kiss. "It's not cheesy," she murmured in his ear. "It's absolutely brilliant. I used to camp outside as a little girl just so I could stay up and watch all night."

"We couldn't see it in London," Sirius said. "Too much light pollution living with the muggles. But the first time I saw it at Hogwarts, it took my breath away. Sort of like you do. Must be in the name," he smiled and pulled her closer. He thought for a moment and produced a small transparent tent with nothing inside but a bed and then led her to it. 

Aurora gasped as the warm air in the tent hit her. "Brilliant, love." She took off her cloak and laid down on the bed to watch the light show. Sirius removed his cloak and lay down beside her on the bed. Warm, comfortable, and the extraordinary lights above them. Aurora reached for Sirius' hand and they watched in companionable silence for a bit. 

"The Celts believed that the lights were the battles of the sky warriors but to me, they always seemed like fairies dancing in the sky. Some people believe that fairies are horrible, mischievous creatures but I think they're just misunderstood," Aurora said. "Like snatching the children. The parents see it as theft, as kidnapping, but I believe that the child was simply born in the wrong time or place and the fairies are charged with righting things." She turned to face Sirius. "Sort of like you really though I suppose the fairies didn't really come to save you. But you were born to the wrong place, to the wrong family." 

Sirius rolled over to face her. "No fairies that I remember though I've never been entirely sure how I ended up on the Knight Bus."

"Let's credit the fairies," Aurora smiled. 

"Let's...." Sirius leaned across and kissed her. "Was it fairies that brought me you?"

"It's unclear what role the fairies play in prophecies though perhaps? If two people needed to meet then they would move those people into the other's path."

"More romantic than 'Lily was horny'," Sirius laughed.

Aurora laughed with him. "Much!" 

"Whatever or whoever it was...." Sirius said quietly. "...I owe them everything. You've changed everything, Aurora. Lit up places in me that I didn't think could ever be lit up." He took her hands, caressing her fingers. "I don't think I can ever give to you everything you've given to me but I want to spend eternity trying...trying to deserve you...if you'll allow it. If you'll agree to marry me." 

"You really don't know what you give me?" Aurora said in sad surprise. "You've given me love, a family, a home. You've let me into the most intimate parts of you and you love the most intimate parts of me. You've already given me everything, my love."

Sirius smiled at her, eyes a bit moist. He learned over and kissed her gently and then leaned his forehead against hers. "Wait! Was that a yes or...."

"Yes! Of course!" Aurora laughed. "I said yes weeks ago and weeks before that and really if you could have read my mind the moment we met, I said yes then too."

Sirius breathed a sigh of relief. "Good then you can have this." He pulled out the ring of Goblin-wrought silver and blue diamonds with its intricate Druid symbols. 

Aurora held out her hand and Sirius placed the ring on her finger. "Lumos," she murmured and looked at the symbols. "Light and dark entwined for all eternity. Perfect." She kissed him thoroughly while the warriors fought and the fairies danced over their heads.


	16. The Druids

The morning dawned in the bright and cheery Potter kitchen as it did so many mornings but this morning, the kitchen table was already full of people anxious for news.

James apparated into the room, brushing snow everywhere.

"Any news?" Fleamont asked.

"I can't believe you just went to spy on them," Lily admonished.

"What? YOU don't want to know what happened?" James asked.

"Yes but..." Lily said.

"I'm sure we know what happened. I'm sure she said yes," Euphemia beamed.

"Of course, I said yes!" Aurora cried walking into the room tracking her own bit of snow. Sirius followed behind her beaming.

Euphemia ran to Aurora and enveloped her in a gigantic hug. "I'm so happy for you, dear! For both of you," Euphemia exclaimed. "Come here, you." She pulled Sirius into a hug crushing him and Aurora together in her happiness. She let Sirius go and led Aurora to the table. "We must start making plans!"

"Congratulations!" Lily said hugging Aurora. "It's wonderful news!"

"Let me see the ring," Euphemia demand taking Aurora's hand.

Fleamont hugged Sirius. "Congratulations, son! I'm so proud of you. She's a wonderful woman."

"I'm really happy for you, Pads," James said hugging Sirius trying not to be emotional.

"Are you crying?" Sirius asked James.

"No!" James wiped away tears. "It's the snow."

"So we need to set a date and find a place and...." Euphemia babbled on happily.

"Maybe we could just enjoy the moment for a...moment," Lily suggested smirking at her enthusiastic mother-in-law.

Aurora smiled at Lily gratefully.

"Of course, of course, dear. I got carried away. It's just that James and Lily's wedding was such a quiet event what with the war and all...but I can be patient," Euphemia smiled at Aurora.

"I don't mind. I love that you want to be a part of it really...." Aurora said her face a bit sad.

"What's wrong, love?" Sirius asked sitting down next to Aurora.

"It's just that...I think I might like my mother to be there," Aurora said. "I hadn't really thought that I would but now that it's real and there are dates and places to discuss...."

"Well, of course, we'll invite her, dear," Fleamont said.

"It may not be that easy," Sirius said quietly.

"I haven't seen her since I left for Hogwarts," Aurora explained. "Druids didn't go to Hogwarts and I disobeyed her, really, in her eyes, betrayed her, by going."

Aurora had barely got the words out before Euphemia was hugging her.

Aurora was always amazed at the love and warmth that Euphemia Potter showed her but today, her heart broke just a bit for the mother she'd left behind.

"If you want her there, then let's go and see her," Sirius said. "It's been so many years...."

"And what if she still hates me?" Aurora asked softly.

"Then you'll come home to your family here and let Mia plan your wedding before she explodes," Fleamont said putting his arm around Aurora and kissing the top of her head.

Aurora nodded and took a deep breath. "Let's go then."

**************

Aurora and Sirius apparated as far as Fionnphort on the Isle of Mull.

"We can't apparate onto Iona. There are wards to prevent such things. To keep wizards out. Or at least to make them use Muggle transport. Easier to see them coming," Aurora explained.

"So we...rent a boat?"Sirius looked dubiously between the rickety fishing boats tied up to the wharf and the choppy waters of the Atlantic.

"I thought we'd just take the ferry like the rest of the muggle tourists," Aurora suggested.

"How do the Druids stay hidden with all the tourists?" Sirius asked.

"You think a Muggle could just happen upon Hogwarts?" Aurora asked.

"Fair point," Sirius admitted. "To the ferry then. And me without my camera!"

Aurora laughed. "Perhaps you could muster an American accent and fit right in."

They walked hand in hand to the ferry and boarded the boat. They found a spot by the rail and watched as Mull shrank away and tiny Iona grew larger. Sirius felt Aurora shiver and pulled her closer to him, resting his chin on her head. "I'm right here, love."

Aurora leaned back against him, accepting his strength. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."

Sirius turned Aurora around to face him. "If you've changed your mind about seeing her, then let's turn around and go home but if it's only fear then I think you may regret not doing this."

Aurora nodded. "I know. You're right. This must be done Thank you for doing it with me."

"We're together now. In all things." The ferry docked and they debarked hand in hand. "Where to now?" Sirius asked.

"Now, we walk," Aurora said leading him away from the The Village toward the south. They walked for a mile or so until they reached the southern shore which seemed completely deserted. "We're here."

Sirius looked around. "I can't see it."

"I was afraid of that," Aurora said and touched her tattooed wrist. "Better?"

Sirius was suddenly confronted with a very small village. A few houses and some sort of shared community building. No shops, no churches, not even a school.

"Her house is over here," Aurora said trying to keep the terror out of her voice. She felt rather than saw Sirius touch his own tattooed wrist to provide her extra fortitude to walk these last few steps. She took his hand so that their tattooed hands were intertwined. He could see the village and she could feel his strength. She climbed the few steps to the front door of the house and knocked tentatively. After a few minutes, a door opened and a woman appeared. The woman's white blonde hair and crystal blue eyes left little doubt who she was. "Mother," Aurora said tentatively.

Sirius wasn't sure what he expected but whatever it was, it wasn't a door slamming in their faces. He thought even Walburga Black might have at least brought them in for tea before eviscerating his heart. He felt Aurora's shoulders shake and grabbed her to his chest holding on as tight as he could, anything to keep her from falling apart. He considered pounding on the door and telling the woman what exactly he thought of her but then thought it might be better to just get Aurora away from here, back to her new family who would never treat her like that. He led her back down the stairs and across the street toward the lane that led back to Baile Mor and the ferry.

"Fuirich ! Aon mhionaid . Mas e do thoil e," an older lady spoke to them from the house next door.

Aurora turned to her. "Carson a bu chòir dhomh feitheamh far a bheil mi fuath ?"

"Bha thu a ' tighinn an dèidh sin iomadh bliadhna le eil naidheachdan agus a' dùileachadh sona Ath-choinneachadh ? Chan eil ach an t-amadan a 'dèanamh sin agus tha thu nach eil an t-amadan, Aurora Solas."

"Do you speak English?" Aurora asked.

"You have been gone so long you forget your native tongue?" the older woman asked.

"My leannan does not speak Gaelic," Aurora explained.

"Leannan? And a Sassenach?" The older woman looked less than impressed. She walked closer to Sirius eyeing him suspiciously. She saw his tattooed hand and took it from Aurora's hand. She gasped when she touched his hand and then stared into his eyes.

Sirius was sure not even Sybill Trelawney had been this creepy.

"DARACH! Tha Darach air tilleadh! Tha Darach air tilleadh!" Her voice rang out like an alarm bell to the rest of the tiny village and people started pouring out of their houses.

Sirius recognized one word in the sentence and certainly caught the panicked tone.

"Well, I guess that theory is proven," Aurora muttered. "This may be a good time to think of an excellent way to stupefy several people simultaneously preferably without permanent harm." To the older woman as well as the villagers coming toward her, she said, "Tha e de shliochd Darach ach chan eil e Darach . Tha e air an t-slighe a chaidh a thaghadh de solas . OUR PATH. A path of light. Look at him. See his magic. It is white not black!"

A stunningly beautiful woman with jet black hair and an ageless look about her came through the crowd (played by Katie McGrath). In fact, the crowd parted for her wordlessly.

"Aurora Solas, you have returned," the woman said in perfect English.

"High Priestess, I have."

"Did I hear you say that you are engaged to marry this man?"

"Yes. This is Sirius Black. Sirius, the high priestess."

Sirius held out his hand politely unsure what the protocol was for high priestesses. Strangely, this had never come up when their governess drilled manners into his and Regulus' heads as children. "It's an honor to meet you."

The high priestess considered Sirius and took his hand. "It is my honor, I am sure." She looked him up and down in a way that made Sirius feel that his brain was being laid open and prodded. Like legilimens on a much more horrible scale.

"He is not Darach but I do not yet understand why this is true. Your family follows the dark path," the high priestess stated.

"Yes," Sirius agreed.

"You are not a part of them and they are not a part of you." The high priestess considered him further. "Are you able to see us without the magic on your wrist?"

"No," Sirius admitted.  
"I will bless this marriage only if he is Druid. Now he is lost between and I cannot abide this union," the high priestess decreed.

"It is the union in the prophecy," Aurora said quickly. "THE union that must occur."

"You saw him?"

"I did. When I was a little girl, I told you of what I saw in the forest. I found the forest and it led me to Sirius. It is SEEN."

The high priestess considered for a long moment. "He must undergo Imbas Forosna and then I will decide if this marriage can proceed. Bring him to an uaimh at midnight."

The high priestess floated down the street and the villagers dispersed in her wake.

"I'm almost afraid to ask but what is Imbas Forosna?" Sirius asked.

"Well, the good news is that there's an excellent chance you'll be able to see magic afterward."

"What's the bad news?"

Aurora took his hand and led him down the street.

"Aurora, what's the bad news?"


	17. Imbas Forosna

Sirius and Aurora walked up the hill to the cave a few minutes before midnight. Sirius noted the full moon and thought of Remus. While the idea of a wolf sipping tea and reading a book may seem funny, he still cringed at the thought of his best friend's bones breaking to allow the wolf to come out. Alas, he had problems of his own tonight most notably what the hell was he getting himself into? Aurora had known very little about this ritual being only a child when she last lived with the Druids. She'd only heard whispers and none of them seemed very encouraging. They walked the last few feet to the cave and ducked to enter.

The high priestess was there along with a few of the villagers all now clad in ceremonial black robes and hoods. Give them masks and they'd look like Death Eaters, Sirius thought with a shiver of terror shooting down his spine. There was a box in the middle of the room that, to Sirius, looked a lot like a coffin. 

Aurora touched her wrist and thought, you don't have to do this. We can run. They only block apparation not spells. We could fight our way out. 

Sirius shook his head. I'll be okay, he thought to her. He looked at the high priestess awaiting instruction.

The high priestess surveyed Sirius with something that almost looked like respect. Had she heard their conversation? Sirius thought she probably had. 

"The Imbas Forosna is an ancient rite of the Druids," the high priestess began. "For a true Druid, it would bring on visions, the sight, but for you, it may work to relocate what you lost when your ancestors left us."

Left you, Sirius thought. Interesting euphemism for exile. He looked into the high priestess' eyes knowing she heard that.

The high priestess smiled enigmatically. "Lay down in the chamber."

Aurora had a death grip on Sirius' hand. 

"It's okay, love," Sirius said, extricating his hand and kissing her hand gently. 

"I'll be right here," Aurora promised him.

"You will not," the high priestess corrected. "Only the priests may stay in the cave for the ceremony."

"I'm not leaving him here alone," Aurora said.

"I'll be okay. I'll see you when it's over," Sirius reassured Aurora.

I'm so sorry I ever suggested coming here, Aurora thought her hand on her wrist. 

Sirius touched his forehead to Aurora's for just a moment and climbed into the box. 

"You must leave now," the high priestess told Aurora.

Aurora turned and left the cave stationing herself on a rock right outside the cave entrance.

Inside the cave, the lower priests were piling animal skins on Sirius' body, covering his body, his face, his eyes, his ears, barely leaving him room to breathe. Once the skins were in place, a stone lid was lifted and placed over the chamber and the priests began to chant in a language even older than Gaelic. 

Sirius felt his heartbeat quicken. He had been buried alive, he realized. That was the ritual. The skins alone were crushing him with their combined weight and then the stone lid on top of that. It was unlikely he could physically get out. Wingardium leviosa, he thought though didn't perform it. It was important to Aurora so he would just lay here and think about something other than suffocation for a few hours if it made her life easier. 

45 minutes later, the hallucinations began. Well, not really hallucinations he thought with his last vestige of sanity. More like stories retold by demons who mixed all of his horrible memories together in the most terrifying way possible. The deepest, darkest recesses of his brain won the day and the rest of the night was spent in waking nightmare. Dementors sucked the soul from 5 year old Regulus. James stalked him, zombie eyes dead but his body still lurching forward. Remus in wolf form tore Harry's intestines from his screaming body. Peter quietly ripped Lily's heart out with his bare hands. Orion Black pointed his wand at Fleamont Potter and whispered Avada Kedavra but instead of quietly dying, Fleamont exploded into a million pieces like the Muggles on that street so many years ago. Walburga Black screamed CRUICIO! CRUCIO! at Euphemia and laughed as all of her bones broke. This violence lasted for hours but when it finally ended, Sirius found that he missed it because what came next was worse. What came next was nothing. Absolute blackness. He knew with every fiber of his being that he was absolutely alone on a plane where no one would ever find him. He would be alone in the dark for eternity.

Aurora watched the dawn break from her rock outside the cave. She was stiff and freezing but none of that mattered. Once the sun topped the hill, she could go into the cave and put a stop to this and if they refused...they would not want to refuse her, she thought angrily. This was stopping one way or another. She'd been able to hear Sirius screaming up until about an hour ago but the silence...the silence was more than she could bear. The top of the sun peaked over the landscape and she jumped up and ran into the cave. "ENOUGH! It is dawn. This is enough!" she yelled at the high priestess. "This ends now."

The high priestess surveyed Aurora calmly and considered her demand as the lower priests continued to chant. "If we finish before it is done, you will not be allowed to marry him."

Aurora understood that the high priestess was baiting her, waiting for her to reveal her plans to escape with him. She buried those thoughts and said," end it now."

"You agree that you will not marry him if it failed," the high priestess stated.

"End it now," Aurora repeated her mind blank.

"As you wish," the high priestess said. 

The priests stopped chanting and lifted the stone lid off the chamber. They removed the skins one by one in a manner Aurora felt was excruciatingly slow. She must remain absolutely calm now. She could not afford to give anything away to the high priestess. Not before Sirius was safe. 

Sirius sat alone on his plane in the darkness. He couldn't remember anything or anyone, couldn't see the face of a single loved one, and yet he felt the loss of all of them crushing him. He had lost all sense of time and place. The only tangible thing to hold onto was the crushing loss and so he clung to it. He would cling to it for all eternity for there was no alternative. If he let go, it would be to fall into the abyss of blackness. He had clung for what seemed like years when he saw the briefest flicker of light. Aurora. The name popped into his consciousness like a beacon. Aurora. He felt weight being removed from his body, his feet touched the ground. He had feet? He hadn't known. Aurora. Hands touched his body, guiding him forward. He was still in darkness and then the darkness was ripped away and he stared blinking into the sun shining on his face, into his newborn eyes. He saw it all and it was beautiful. Magical. 

"Sirius!" Aurora cried.

Aurora. His mind, his soul, his body knew her. She called a name. Was that his name? He looked toward the sound of her voice and was blinded by the light shining out of her. She was pure light. And then she was holding him and he was pure light too. He sagged against her. This body was new to him and he wasn't sure how to control it yet. He let the pure light rush through him banishing the remnants of the darkness, of the hopelessness of the abyss. He felt memories rushing back to him as she held him. The Potters, Remus, Harry.... The nightmares were just nightmares. The darkness was just darkness. He was in the light now and would not ever leave it. He looked around at the world again, holding onto the light in his hands. The shimmering auras around the trees, the symphonic calls of the morning birds, he understood them as they spoke to each other, the vibrations of the earth under his feet, the feel of the sky on his skin. "This is how you see it?" he asked Aurora.

"Yes," Aurora replied. 

"It's breathtaking," Sirius said. 

************************************

Aurora led Sirius into the bedroom of the cottage that had been provided to them. She sat him on the bed and sat down beside him preparing to assess the damage. He'd been quiet on their walk to the cottage whether because he was overwhelmed with the magic of all living things or because the ritual had driven him into a catatonic state, she really wasn't sure. "Sirius, love?" She touched his face and he leaned against her hand. "Are you okay?"

Sirius found that stringing words together wasn't as easy as it had been before what with the swirling of magic and images and nightmares in his brain but he focused on the light and said, "Yes. I think so. It's...lessening. The...confusion." He tentatively touched her face as if touching her might make her evaporate into nothing. "You're real."

Aurora wasn't sure if it was a statement or a question. "I'm real, love. It's over now. I think the confusion will pass in a few hours."

"And the magic?" Sirius asked.

"I'm afraid you're stuck with that," Aurora said ruefully. "I have always seen this way but I could see where suddenly seeing everything might be a shock."

"A shock. Yes," Sirius agreed. "But a good shock, I think. Just overwhelming right now. There's so much that I couldn't see, couldn't hear before. You, for instance."

"Me?" Aurora asked. 

"Your real...you," Sirius said and then shook his head frustrated with the swirling. "The...I don't know what the word is. Your...you."

Aurora smiled understanding what he meant. "There is no word. Some things can't be words."

Sirius nodded. That made sense. No word could possibly be enough to symbolize what he saw when he looked at her. 

"You should rest," Aurora said. She stood and started undressing him. "You must be exhausted."

"Yes. And no." Sirius wrapped his arms around her and lay his head against her stomach. He felt her arms come around him and relished the utter safety he felt there. The black abyss still danced around the edge of his brain though. The loneliness, the utter despair that was somehow even worse than a roomful of dementors. He pulled Aurora down on his lap and kissed her. Kissing pure light almost short circuited his fuzzy brain but he persevered and lay back on the bed pulling her with him, kissing her deeply, his tongue in her mouth, his hands in her hair. She kissed him back with equal passion struggling with their clothes. Naked,he thought and the clothes vanished. He rolled over on top of her and thrust into her desperate to be a part of her, to run far away from the abyss toward the light, toward the warmth, toward love.

*****************************************

Several hours later, Aurora lay tangled up with Sirius watching him sleep. His breathing was even and he didn't seem to be plagued with some of the troubled sleep that he had been in the past for which she was glad. The ritual had been even worse than she'd feared but he seemed to be recovering. If he hadn't, she thought to herself. But he is. He has to. 

"I can hear you thinking from here," Sirius murmured sleepily. 

"What? You cannot," Aurora said. "I wasn't touching my wrist."

"The ritual was worse than you thought. You're afraid I won't recover," Sirius said quietly. He propped his head up so he could see her. "It was pretty awful but I am recovering. And being able to see...I'm glad I did it. For you, because it was important to you but also for me." He leaned over and kissed her gently. "So no more guilt. I'll be fine. I already feel much better. The worst bits feel like fading nightmares now. I'm awake and they're fleeting."

"I'm still sorry I put you through it," Aurora said. "And for nothing really." She remembered her mother slamming the door in her face. 

"I'm so sorry about that, love," Sirius murmured pulling her closer. "I can't change her but I can give you love and a family who loves you. Who really love you."

Aurora smiled thinking of Fleamont and Euphemia. "I know. I can feel their love and it's more than she ever gave me even before but...."

"What mother would hate her own child? Or more accurately, how unloveable must a child be to be hated by its own mother?" Sirius asked knowingly. "It's a question I've asked myself many times...but then I think of the Potters and they love me even though they didn't have to. So maybe I'm not unloveable. Maybe there's something wrong with Walburga and Orion."

"In my head, I know that's true. I see the logic but...."

"It's easier to believe the bad stuff," Sirius finished understanding completely.

They jumped at a pounding on the front door. Sirius looked questioningly. Aurora shrugged. They both got up, dressed, and then walked to the door. Sirius took her hand not quite ready to be disconnected. Aurora opened the door tentatively.

"I hope you've been able to rest," said the high priestess. 

"Yes, thanks," Sirius said. He was surprised that he could so easily read her thoughts. He didn't mean to but they were just there like a sign in the street. "Your little ritual worked, I can assure you," he said answering a question she hadn't asked.

"I see that it may have," the high priestess said. "Though you're a wizard. You could be a legilimens."

"Not really my thing," Sirius admitted. "Was rubbish at occlumency as well. But now...is there a way to control it? I don't really care to see everyone's thoughts all the time."

"I was projecting before," the high priestess said. "You shouldn't be able to read them now."

"Just a test then," Sirius stated.

"Aye."

"I passed?" Sirius asked.

"Indeed."

"So we agree that the ritual worked?" Aurora asked. "I can marry him."

"Yes. Though you would have anyway," the high priestess said. "I will perform the ceremony on Beltane."

"Here?" Aurora asked.

"Yes."

"May my family come?" Sirius asked.

The high priestess looked at him curiously. "You are not a part of your family."

"Not my blood family. My true family," Sirius explained.

The high priestess looked as if she'd found a particularly intriguing piece of the puzzle. "Oh yes, indeed they should come," she said. 

"When is Beltane?" Sirius asked.

"In two days," Aurora told him. "May 1st."

"We'll go back and get them and bring them here then," Sirius said.

"You may go," the high priestess said. "I believe Aurora must stay here for now."

Sirius was beginning to distrust this high priestess, a feeling strengthened by the color of her...whatever...light was not radiating from her. It was something else. Something that made his spine feel cold. "No."

"It's okay, love. You'll just be gone a couple of hours," Aurora said. "She is right. I have left things unfinished here."

Sirius looked at her and thought, I don't want you to face her alone. 

"I'll be okay. Just hurry back," Aurora forced a smile and kissed Sirius gently on the lips. 

"Okay." Sirius instinctively tried to apparate. "You really can't lift the ward?" he asked the high priestess.

"You really can't walk a mile to the ferry?" the high priestess answered. "Wizards have become far too dependent on magic. Besides, it's a lovely day."

*****

Sirius found the walk to the ferry quite enlightening. Apparently, the trees have quite a bit to say to someone who's listening. Not horribly interesting things but still they've been around a long time and like to tell stories of everyone who has walked in front of them. The birds as well were chatty and he found that he didn't really mind the company. He actually replied to the trees briefly before realizing that anyone walking along this road would find him insane. 

Across the ocean on the ferry, Sirius saw a dolphin who chattered to him as well. "Beautiful day, isn't it?" the dolphin asked. "A bit nippy still but spring is coming. Say, could you walk over to that bucket and toss me those fish?" Sirius nodded and grabbed the bucket tossing its contents overboard. "Thanks mate!" The dolphin swam away. 

Sirius' brain was starting to swirl again though with mostly positive things now when he debarked the ferry and apparated to the Potter house. 

Euphemia and Fleamont sat at the table playing wizard chess and sipping tumblers of firewhiskey. The kitchen fire roared softly behind them giving the room a warm and toasty glow. 

"Sirius!" Euphemia jumped up and hugged him upsetting a knight who cursed at her in French. My doing, thought Sirius as he hugged his mum tightly, I taught it French. He felt like he hadn't seen her in centuries, remembered feeling like he'd never see her again. 

Fleamont got up and patted him on the back and then offered him a tumbler of firewhiskey. 

Sirius sat with them at the kitchen table sipping firewhiskey and told them about Aurora's mother and the villagers and the high priestess. He was vaguer about the ritual -- no need to worry them -- but had to share the feeling of being able to see and hear everything. "It's extraordinary. Like this blindfold has been taken off. I talked to a dolphin. Well, the dolphin talked to me. I didn't quite feel comfortable talking back...."

"Extraordinary," Fleamont murmured. "I have to say I'm a bit envious, son. I can't wait to hear every detail."

Sirius smiled recognizing the "we must deconstruct this odd Muggle contraption" tone in his voice. 

"Yes, yes, very interesting," Euphemia said also recognizing the tone and putting a stop to it before it was too late. "But what about poor Aurora? She's still there?"

"That's why I'm here. The high priestess insists we get married there in a Druid ceremony," Sirius explained.

Euphemia looked devastated. "Without us?"

"NO! Of course not. I've come back to get you and James and Lily. You'll come?"

"Of course, we'll come. We wouldn't miss your wedding for anything, son," Fleamont said. "I'll just pop in and get your brother." He apparated from his seat at the table. 

"I can't stop thinking about Aurora and her mother. She must be so hurt," Euphemia said sadly.

Sirius almost smiled. The warm bright glow emanating from his mum turned a tiny bit pink as she fretted about Aurora. "She's trying to put on a brave face but of course, she's upset about it. Thinks it's something unloveable about her."

Euphemia looked sad. "That's absolutely not true. She's such a lovely, kind girl. I couldn't love her more if she were my own."

"That's what I told her you'd say," Sirius smiled for a moment and then turned sober, taking her hand. "I used to think the same way she does. That there was something wrong with me that made my mother hate me but then I met you...." 

Euphemia hugged Sirius. "It was never you, my dear son," she murmured in his ear. "You're absolutely lovable."

**************  
Aurora steeled herself, walked up the steps to the house, and knocked on the door. 

A couple minutes passed before her mother, Ceres, answered the door. "You shouldn't...."

Aurora interrupted her. "I know you hate me and I don't expect forgiveness. I just wanted to explain and then you can slam the door in my face and I won't bother you again."

Ceres looked pained but kept the door open.

"I had to leave here. The dream, the prophecy wasn't here. It was at Hogwarts sort of though not the way I thought it might be but I found it, the reason, and it's beautiful and.... I just wanted you to know that I didn't leave to hurt you or because I didn't love you. I know my father left but it wasn't like that. My life just wasn't supposed to be here. I have a daughter too. Luna. I don't know what I'd do if she left but I'm pretty sure I could never hate her so I don't really understand how...." Aurora felt the tears coming. "Anyway, I'm getting married on Beltane and I wish you would be there...."

Ceres blinked back tears, forced her face to remain impassive. "You shouldn't be here. Leave. NOW." She slammed the door in Aurora's stunned and devastated face.

***************************

 

"This ferry's wonderful," Fleamont cried examining the engines and paddle. "Remarkable!" 

James, Lily and Euphemia all rolled their eyes and looked out over the water as the boat sailed from Mull to Iona. 

Sirius saw his dolphin friend again.

"Hello again, mate! Any more fish up there?"

Sirius looked around but the bucket was empty. "Sorry, nothing here."

"No worries. Plenty of fish in the sea," the dolphin laughed -- do dolphins laugh? -- and swam away. 

"You could understand that?" James asked incredulously.

"Yeah. He wants fish but I gave him all that was on the boat on my last trip. He made a horrible pun before he swam off. Plenty of fish in the sea," Sirius said cringing. 

"Dolphins have a sense of humor?" Lily asked.

"I guess though arguably not a good one. The birds and trees are pretty straight arrows though," Sirius explained wondering if he sounded like a complete nutter or just a partial nutter. Probably complete. 

The ferry pulled into the dock and the five of them debarked. "We have to walk a bit," Sirius said pointing to the path south away from The Village. The sun was setting as they walked. 

"Lovely island. Can't believe we've never been over here," Fleamont said.

"We did go to Skye that one time, dear," Euphemia said. 

"Oh yes. Quite nice. Greatly enjoyed hiking the Quiraing, we did," Fleamont said. 

Sirius saw the village up ahead and then realized they probably couldn't which may make this tricky. 

"Oh what an adorable village," Lily cried.

"You can see it?" Sirius asked relieved but confused. He saw Aurora walking toward them and met her halfway pulling her into his arms and kissing her. "I missed you."

"I missed you too," Aurora said hugging him tightly. Perhaps too tightly.

"Are you okay?" Sirius asked looking into Aurora's eyes.

Aurora shook her head determined not to cry. "I tried to talk to her again...."

"You poor thing," Euphemia cried hugging Aurora tightly. "Sirius told us what happened."

Aurora hugged Euphemia, feeling better. 

"So do we get a tour or is that a top secret Druid thing?" James asked.

"The high priestess took off a level of protection so you could see so a tour should be acceptable," Aurora said. "She's quite interested to meet what she now thinks is the reason Sirius is not Darach. You've become a bit of an obsession for her," she said to Sirius, taking his hand as they walked toward the village. "I'm almost jealous," she teased.

"Don't be," Sirius said. "I'm not sure I quite even trust her to be honest."

"You see it too?" Aurora asked quietly.

"Yes," Sirius said

The high priestess walked toward them. 

Sirius arranged his face into noncommittal politeness and made the introductions. "These are my parents, Euphemia and Fleamont Potter."

"Lovely to meet you both," the high priestess murmured her voice polite but her mind searching.

Sirius looked at the high priestess pointedly and said," stop."

A brief flush of surprise crept over the face of the high priestess before her polite demeanor returned. "And this is?"

"My brother, James, and his wife, Lily," Sirius said. 

Pleasantries exchanged, the high priestess walked them to the cottage where they would all stay with Sirius and Aurora until after the wedding. 

"It was lovely to meet all of you. I'll let you settle in now." 

The high priestess left and Sirius closed the door behind her. He thought for a moment and then placed several spells upon the door as well.

"So I'm not the only one she's rubbing the wrong way?" James asked.

"Definitely no," Aurora said. "Though I don't see what her end game might be."

"To keep you here," Sirius said.

Aurora looked surprised. "A guess or...."

"I read it in her thoughts. I know I shouldn't have but...."

"You can do that now?" Lily asked. "Legilimens was always the one thing you couldn't do well."

"Apparently, I just needed to spend some quality time hallucinating in a sensory deprivation chamber. Can't imagine why no one thought of that," Sirius said with just a touch of bitterness.

"If she wants Aurora to stay then we should go. Tonight," Fleamont said. "Something's off about her."

"I agree. We'll have the wedding at home," Euphemia said.

"We'll wait until after the wedding," Sirius said.

"No, they're right. The time to go is now when she's not expecting it," Aurora agreed.

"Aurora, love, I know that this is important to you. Getting married here, this way. I'm not going to let her deprive you of that," Sirius said gently kissing Aurora's forehead. "We'll need a solid strategy to get out as soon as the ceremony is over though.""Apparation is out then," Fleamont said. "What about other magic?"

"I haven't noticed any other differences," Sirius said. "Not to say that she couldn't increase the protections during the ceremony."

"I know what's north but what's to the east?" Lily asked. 

"A bit of land and then ocean," Aurora said. 

"What are you thinking?" James asked.

"They'll expect us to leave the way we came so we'll need to leave to the east by sea. Monty, do you think you can spell one of those fishing boats?" Lily asked. "Maybe two to fit us all."

"Absolutely."


	18. Blood of My Blood

Beyond the cave were standing stones. Smaller than Stonehenge or even Brodgar but somehow far more ancient. Torches lit the circle, shadows dancing over the stones. The moon shone above, waning but only slightly. Tents were set up on either side of the stones for the bride and groom. 

Sirius sat alone in the groom's tent looking nervously at the door. James and Fleamont had been gone for what felt like hours working on their getaway boats. When they finally snuck back into the tent, Sirius breathed an audible sigh of relief. He looked at them questioningly and they nodded. It was done. 

Fleamont sat down beside Sirius ready to play father of the groom. "Are you nervous?" He asked.

Sirius considered this. He was nervous about the ceremony and about their escape but not about being married to Aurora. "Not about being married. I have never been more sure about anything."

"Now you know, on your wedding night, you'll be expected to perform some tasks...." James said and laughed as Sirius rolled his eyes. 

"I'm well aware, thanks," Sirius said laughing. 

"I'm really happy for you, son," Fleamont said. "You've become such a good man and I just couldn't be prouder of you."

"Really, we're going to get mushy?" James asked. "I was trying to set the tone at inappropriate!" 

They laughed companionably. 

In the bride's tent, Lily and Euphemia were doing everything they could to create a stunning bride within the confining requirements of traditional Druid dress robes. Lily braided tiny blue flowers in Aurora's long white blonde hair while Euphemia fussed with the robes. 

"Well, at least the robe is white," Euphemia frowned not knowing what else could really be done. She looked at the flowers in Lily's fingers and then conjured a belt of flowers with more flowers hanging down from it. "I don't care about tradition. It's your wedding day and you should be absolutely beautiful."

"They are found in nature," Lily said.

"I think it'll be okay," Aurora said quietly.

"Are you nervous, dear? You seem nervous. I know some women are nervous about the wedding night but...." Euphemia began.

"Oh! No, it's not that," Aurora said quickly before things became embarrassing. "I guess it's just...I love you, both of you and I'm so happy you're here. I...."

"It's okay to wish your mother was here, dear," Euphemia said gently. 

"My mother IS here," Aurora said softly, taking Euphemia's hand. "I know that."

Euphemia hugged Aurora tightly crushing the flowered belt. "Yes, I am, dear. Always remember that."

**************************

Sirius stood, barefoot, wearing a traditional white Druid robe, in the middle of the glowing, murmuring standing stones with James on his left. James reached over and put his hand on Sirius' shoulder giving him a reassuring squeeze and Sirius smiled at him. No need for words between them to convey the depth of their bond.

The villagers stood around the standing stones, the torches flashing shadows on their hoods, their faces covered. 

And then Aurora, also barefoot, appeared outside the standing stones holding onto Fleamont's arm and Sirius felt his heart stop for just a moment before it began beating again 100 times faster than it had been. Suddenly he felt nervous and completely calm all at once. 

Fleamont and Aurora walked toward Sirius and James arriving in the middle of the standing stones followed by Lily and Euphemia. Fleamont transferred Aurora's hand to Sirius and then gave Sirius a hug before taking his place at James' left. Lily and Euphemia moved to Aurora's right.

Sirius stared into Aurora's eyes and realized with panic that he may be speechless again but then she smiled at him and everything else melted away. He took her other hand and leaned his forehead against hers. I love you, he thought. I love you, she thought. 

The high priestess came from the opposite end of the standing stones and joined the wedding party in the center. "We will begin." The high priestess handed Sirius a small silver knife with intricate Celtic symbols on its hilt and blade. 

Sirius took the knife and cut the palm of his untattooed hand. "You are Blood of my Blood, and Bone of my Bone," Sirius began reverently staring into Aurora's eyes. "I give you my Body, that we Two might be One. I give you my Spirit, `til our Life shall be Done." He handed the knife to Aurora.

Aurora cut the palm of her untattooed hand. "You can not possess me for I belong to myself," she said solemnly staring into Sirius' eyes. "But while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give. You can not command me, for I am a free person. But I shall serve you in those ways you require and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand."

They clasped hands mixing their blood. 

"I vow you the first cut of my meat, the first sip of my wine, from this day it shall only be your name I cry out in the night and into your eyes that I smile each morning," Sirius said with a slight smile.

"I shall be a shield for your back as you are for mine, nor shall a grievous word be spoken about us, for our marriage is sacred between us and no stranger shall hear my grievance," Aurora said. "Above and beyond this, I will cherish and honor you through this life and into the next. "

"This is my wedding vow to you. This is the marriage of equals," Sirius and Aurora murmured together.

James and Lily stepped forward and wrapped the clasped hands of the bride and groom together with a white ribbon and then stepped back to their places. Underneath the ribbon, their hands glowed blue and then tattoos appeared symbolizing their union.

The high priestess raised her hands above her head and said, "Tha mi a ' gairm air na ceithir eileamaidean a bheannachadh seo aonaidh. Tha an talamh , a 'ghaoth , an teine , an t-uisge . Talamh seo ann an aonadh an talamh . Leig seo aonadh ri èirich anns a 'ghaoith . Mhà seo aonadh losgadh mar as motha teine agus fhathast a 'toirt an ciùin agus sìth agus glanaidh cumhachdan an uisge . Elements , tha mi gairm air a-nis."

The stones seemed to come alive around them, their quiet murmurings raising to a crescendo of song that reminded Sirius of the song the merpeople sang. The earth shuddered beneath their bare feet. The wind howled as lightning struck and thunder roared and rain poured down upon them for an instant and vanished as quickly as it had come. 

Sirius felt the power of the elements racing through his veins mixing with his existing magic. The feeling was exhilarating.

"The elements have blessed this union and have decreed that it will be a long and successful one," the high priestess said and then smiled. "You may kiss the bride as the Sassenachs say."

Sirius kissed Aurora deeply. "I love you, wife," he whispered as he finally pulled away.

Aurora smiled radiantly at him. "I love you, husband." 

Sirius felt James' hand barely graze his back and he nodded. "Incendio!"

A huge ball of fire appeared above him hovering menacingly as Aurora, Lily, and Euphemia ran toward the woods. 

Curses and flashes of light came from everywhere all at once. The villagers were skilled duelers but their skills were theoretical, untested and the two Order of the Phoenix soldiers and the auror were quickly overwhelming them. 

"Finite incantatum," the high priestess yelled and the fireball vanished. "Carminibus."

James felt his magic vanish suddenly and he didn't like it at all. 

"As I said before, wizards are too reliant on magic. It is a weakness," the high priestess said. She turned to two of the priests. "Find them." She turned to Sirius. "I am afraid I can not allow your bride to leave. She is valuable to me for reasons not yet known. I will not lose her again."

"I won't leave her here!" Sirius said his voice turning to ice. "You don't know who you're dealing with." He tried hard to summon Orion and ignore the fact that anything he said would be an empty threat.

James thought he quite enjoyed the Black tone in these circumstances.

"I believe I do, Mr. Black. Better than you do certainly. I will allow your family to leave. You are welcome to remain. To end the exile."

"Sirius and Aurora are coming with us," Fleamont said icily. 

"You're outnumbered and without magic," the high priestess said quietly. "They will remain."

Sirius felt the presence of the wolves before he saw them. Padfoot's ancestors. He reached out to the alpha in his head. "Hello, friend."

"Hello," the wolf said telepathically. "Are you a friend?"

"My best friend is a wolf. Many nights I ran with him. Especially during the full moon."

"I see the soul of the wolf inside of you but you are not a wolf."

"I am not but like you I have a pack to protect and they are in danger from these people. Will you help me?" 

The wolf considered for a moment. "The wolf blood is one blood. We will help you."

"I would prefer that the people not be hurt. Just distracted while my pack escapes."

"That I cannot promise."

"I understand."

"We shall begin."

"Thank you," Sirius thought bowing slightly to the alpha.

Chaos ensued as the wolves attacked the Druids.

"Run!" Sirius yelled at James and Fleamont and the three ran quickly into the woods. 

"Where the hell did the wolves come from?" James yelled still running.

"They've been there awhile. It took a bit to convince them to attack," Sirius explained breathless. 

They ran on at top speed until they reached the shore where the three women were waiting for them.

"The boats don't work!" Lily said desperately.

"She blocked all magic," Sirius explained. "I think we'll have to swim for it."

"Keep trying to apparate until you can do," James said. 

A woman came running out of the woods toward them. 

"Mother!" Aurora said.

"You must go now," Ceres said urgently. "I will hold her off for as long as I can but you must go now." She grabbed Aurora's hand. "I have always loved you, daughter. Please don't ever doubt that but you must go and never come back. It was too dangerous here for you then. That is why you were exiled. Why I...I rejected you. I saw that this is not your place. That it is not safe for you here. Please promise me that you will never return."

The high priestess flew toward them glowing red against the night sky. 

"We have to go now," Sirius said. 

Aurora hesitated tears rolling down her face. "You were protecting me? You love me?"

"More than my life, my dear sweet Aurora. But now you must leave this place and never return. Promise me!" Ceres cried.

"Aurora...." Sirius cried. " We have to go now!"

"I promise," Aurora said through her tears. "I love you."

Ceres hugged her daughter and then let go quickly. "Go!" 

All six jumped into the water as Ceres turned to face the high priestess. Both women yelled curses and chaos erupted. The six had apparated before they could see who was left standing.

*******************************************************************************************

Six sopping wet, exhausted people fell to the floor of the Potter kitchen. 

"Incendio," Fleamont muttered lighting the fire. 

James laid back on the floor in a puddle. "That was close."

"Just like the old days, huh, Prongs?" Sirius asked exhausted but exhilarated.

Euphemia stood and busied herself making tea so she didn't have to think about how close they'd just come. She relaxed back against Fleamont as he put his arms around her. 

"Everyone is okay, darling," Fleamont whispered in her ear. "Nothing but a good story to tell at anniversary parties now."

Aurora stood warming her hands by the fire.

Sirius stood behind her and rubbed her hands, trying to warm her.

"Do you think she survived?" Aurora asked softly.

"I don't know," Sirius answered honestly. "If she didn't, she died a good death."

Aurora nodded. "She exiled me for my own protection and I never knew." Tears rolled down her face. "I thought she hated me." She turned and wept into her husband's shoulder.


	19. Aurorius

The six sat at the kitchen table eating breakfast.

"So Lily and I have a surprise for you," James said. 

"You do?" Sirius asked warily wondering if there was a prank war from 5th year that might still be going on.

"We planned your honeymoon for you," Lily said. 

"You did?" Aurora asked touched by their gift.

Sirius smiled now that he realized LIly was involved thus making it less likely to explode or cause facial warts. "Where to?"

"That's a surprise," Lily said.

"A sort of mystery even," James said. 

"Are you ready?" Lily asked. 

Sirius and Aurora looked at each other warily. "Um. Sure?" Aurora said. 

James said, "excaecatio."

"What the hell did you do? I can't see!" Sirius said.

"Me neither!" Aurora said.

"It wouldn't be much of a surprise if you could see it, now would it?" Lily said.

Sirius was greatly regretting trusting Lily when he felt someone take his hand and apparate him somewhere. He felt warmth on his face and thought he smelled salt in the air. Tropical. 

"Finite incantatum," James murmured.

Sirius and Aurora looked around and found themselves alone on a deserted beach with the whitest sand they had ever seen next to water that was clear like glass. 

"This place is so beautiful," Aurora breathed. "Look! They even conjured a tent!"

"They're getting much better manipulating the air," Sirius said proudly. 

"So you know, we haven't actually consummated our marriage yet," Aurora pointed out. "...and I believe you did promise to cry out my name in the middle of the night...."

"I did but it's the middle of the day," Sirius pointed out as he kissed her ear lobes, her neck.

Aurora moaned and pretended to pull away. "You're right. We'll have to wait."

"No waiting," Sirius murmured kissing her thoroughly, his tongue in her mouth, his hands taking off her blouse and kissing the bared skin until she was breathless and pushing against him. "Unless you want to wait?"

"Just shut it," Aurora said and kissed him hard dragging him to the sand with her. 

Sirius literally vanished their clothes. "No need for these on a deserted island." He moaned as she raised her hips reaching for him, rubbing against him. He thrust inside of her and she , wrapped her legs around him pushing him deeper still. She felt his fingers rubbing against her, felt the blinding pleasure build and build into orgasm. "Sirius!" She felt him shudder with his own pleasure as well as hers. "Aurora!"

*********************************************************

Days and nights passed full of sex and snorkeling and sex and napping on the beach and more sex. It was after the latter, that they lay on a blanket in the sand with Sirius' head resting on Aurora's stomach. They gazed at the pure beauty of the island, of each other, and sighed together. 

"This is truly utopia," Sirius said. 

"It feels like no one has ever been here before but us," Aurora said dreamily. 

"It does! We should name it," Sirius said propping himself up to better look at Aurora. "Whoever discovers an island gets to name it."

"Technically, James and Lily discovered it," Aurora corrected.

"I believe we've more than christened it though," Sirius said suggestively.

Aurora smiled. "Very true. So what should we name it?"

"How about Aurorius?"

"I love it."

"Wanna christen it with its new name?" 

Aurora nodded. Sirius laid down on top of her, kissing her.


	20. Dumbledore

In the tent on Aurorius, Sirius bolted upright wakened out of a deep sleep. Just a dream, he thought. Seemed so real. Like he could reach out and touch...Dumbledore. He hadn't thought of him in months and now he couldn't free himself of the image.

Aurora sat up blinking sleepily. "What's wrong, love?" She touched his arm and he flinched.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Just a really disturbing dream," Sirius laid back down, pulling her with him, snuggling her against his chest. "It's nothing. Go back to sleep." 

"Doesn't seem like nothing from the look on your face," Aurora murmured against his chest.

"It was just really real. Like I was there. Like it just happened. Not really dreamy, you know?" Sirius finished his less than impressive description. "It seemed more like a memory but it never happened."

Aurora propped herself up on an elbow to look at him. "A memory not a dream? Or a premonition?"

"I don't know," Sirius admitted. "Do they feel real? Like you could reach out and touch the person it's about?"  
"Aye. Sometimes," Aurora said softly. "They're different from dreams. Maybe you should tell me what this one was about."

"It was about Dumbledore actually. Which is weird because I really can't remember the last time I thought about him."

"What was he doing?"

"Standing on the astronomy tower at Hogwarts. Snape was there too and some blond kid who I think was my cousin, Draco. Dumbledore was trying to talk Draco out of killing him."

"Would Draco kill Dumbledore? Could he?"

"Would he? Yes, if his Death Eater parents told him to, I'm sure he would. Could he? One would think killing the greatest wizard of our age would be a tall task for a 16 year old."

"What was Snape doing?"

"That's when it got weird actually. Dumbledore was trying to talk Draco out of killing him but then Snape killed him. Dumbledore fell right off the top of the tower which is when I woke up."

"Would Snape kill Dumbledore?" Aurora asked softly.

"I'm probably not the most objective person to ask," Sirius admitted. "He makes my skin crawl. Like my parents' house embodied in human form. Dumbledore trusts him...though Remus and I were never sure why. We thought maybe he was blackmailing Snape with something."

"Blackmail doesn't buy loyalty."

"Not at all. The even weirder thing is that Dumbledore didn't resist. He didn't have a wand but it's hard to believe he really needs one at this point in his career. It almost seemed like he let Snape kill him." Sirius snuggled down next to her again, getting sleepy. "I'm sure it was just a dream."

"I'm not," Aurora murmured to herself.

****************************

The next day, Sirius found himself unable to shake the dream from the night before. He kept reliving the green burst of light from Snape's wand, Dumbledore falling over the parapet to the ground below. He was filled with an overwhelming sense of foreboding.

"You're still thinking about it," Aurora stated.

Sirius nodded. "You really think it's a premonition?"

"I really think that the ritual, our marriage ceremony, could well have encouraged certain latent tendencies to bubble up in you. Including sight."

"So I know that Snape's going to kill Dumbledore and my ability to do something about it is what?" Sirius asked frustrated.

"I didn't say sight was a good thing," Aurora said gently. "I doubt there's anything you can do to prevent it."

"I think I'd rather just see the magic," Sirius said glumly. 

Aurora put her hands on Sirius' face and kissed him gently. "I know it's hard to feel powerless but the sight isn't about changing the outcome. It's just about the knowing."

"So I know that Snape kills Dumbledore. I guess I should feel better that I wasn't the only one who put my trust in the wrong person," Sirius said bitterly.

Aurora kissed Sirius again. "Clearly, I'm going to have to spend today finding creative ways to distract you," she murmured against his lips, pressing against him.

They were startled apart when James and Lily apparated next to them.

"It's Dumbledore. You should come now," James said urgently.

****************************************************************

By the time the foursome got to the In Between, Dumbledore was standing and gazing into the mist as several wizards walked toward him, their clothes showing various decades' fashion, the span of a long life of lives touched. 

Dumbledore was searching for someone but was disappointed to find that she, his sister, wasn't among these well intentioned people. Mostly strangers now. Except a group of four recent arrivals. He smiled when he saw James and Lily Potter with Sirius Black. And the Druid girl, Aurora Solas. Interesting choice but then he'd harbored suspicions as to whether the Blacks had ties older than even they realized. He walked over to the foursome and smiled. James and Lily looked exactly as he remembered them, young and in love. Sirius though.... "Death becomes you, Sirius." 

Sirius smiled but also looked wary. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, Dumbledore thought. We probably didn't part on the best of terms. Making him stay at Grimmauld Place may have been too much to ask. "I assume you have some questions about Harry," Dumbledore stated. He looked around. "Is there somewhere a little less...moor-like...to speak?"

Sirius offered his hand and Dumbledore took it. The ease with which he found himself in the Potter drawing room was exhilarating. "Interesting. Much easier than apparation." 

The two couples sat together and looked at Dumbledore quizzically. He'd barely noticed Fleamont and Euphemia joining them. He had noticed that no refreshments were offered, no pleasantries exchanged. He would need to explain many decisions to these people. He owed them explanations but wasn't confident that anything he could say would matter much to them. "So where shall I begin?" he asked.

"I'd like an explanation for my son being sent to Azkaban without so much as a trial myself," Fleamont stated, anger just under the surface. 

"Dad..." Sirius started.

"No. I'd like to hear it from Albus," Fleamont insisted.

"As would I," Euphemia agreed.

"Of course. I was under the now clearly false impression that Sirius was the secret keeper and...." Dumbledore began with the story he'd told many people over the last three years including one very angry werewolf and one perhaps even angrier transfigurations professor. 

"So you thought that my son would just betray his family? Just suddenly revert to being a Black? For what reason? Did you even ask him why? Give him any chance to defend himself? Before you threw him in a cell with DEMENTORS?" Fleamont lost the battle with his anger, standing and shouting.

Sirius looked touched by his father's defense. Always a bit surprised that the Potters loved him. 

Dumbledore knew he deserved the man's wrath. The wrath of a father whose son had been poorly used but the truth...the truth would make it worse. But what beyond the truth would do? 

"Did you honestly believe that Sirius did this thing?" Euphemia asked quietly, pulling her husband back down to his chair.

So it's honesty then and let the proverbial chips fall where they may. "I had my doubts," Dumbledore said equally quietly. 

Sirius looked stunned. "Then why?" he asked. He felt Aurora take his hand, rubbing it, and tried to focus on her warmth, her strength even though everything in his brain seemed to be crumbling.

Everyone scowled at Dumbledore but Sirius, who just stared at him with the abject pain of betrayal. The anger was easier, Dumbledore decided. He had begun though and now he must finish. Must try to provide if not peace of mind, then answers as to why this family had been asked to sacrifice so much more than any other. Why there were sacrifices still to come. "Before I continue, I ask that you allow me to tell you all of what I know before you ask me to leave. I believe Harry's future and the future of our world depend on it."

"Make it quick," Fleamont growled.

Dumbledore took a deep breath. "You must understand that this was never my plan. I simply reacted to opportunities as they presented themselves. Had Sirius not tracked down Peter....""Do not dare to blame my son for this," Fleamont spoke ominously.

"No, I wasn't saying that..." Dumbledore started again. "After James and Lily died, I felt that the best thing for Harry...for his protection and for what I feared he would eventually be called on to do...was to live with Lily's sister rather than Sirius. I sent Hagrid to the house in Godric's Hollow with the intention of ensuring that Sirius couldn't take the baby." 

"You purposely left him with Petunia and Vernon?" Lily was livid. 

"How was that the best thing for Harry?" James asked coldly. "They HATE wizards. Do you have any idea how badly Petunia treated Lily? And Vernon was even worse!"

The whole truth? Maybe part of the truth would suffice. "I felt that the old magic that Lily used to protect Harry from Voldemort would remain as long as he was with blood family." 

"They treated him like rubbish every day of his life. They hated him. What kind of monster...." Sirius raged on Harry's behalf.

Dumbledore interrupted Sirius' rant. "I am perhaps a monster but a monster who wants the same outcomes that you want. A world free of Voldemort. Even then I knew his absence was only temporary. I had to plan for the next war and so I placed Harry with the Dursleys and when you were caught with the dead muggles..." He looked warily at Fleamont. " I let them put you in Azkaban..."

"Let them????" Fleamont stood and took a step toward Dumbledore. Euphemia put a steadying hand on his arm.

Dumbledore focused on Sirius as his best hope of making them all understand. "...because I knew you'd never allow Harry to live where he was hated. It would trigger every horrifying childhood memory you possessed and I couldn't spend the next 10 years keeping you from kidnapping him and so I let Barty Crouch do what he wanted with you. I am so-..."

"Get out," Fleamont said in a quiet, icy tone that reminded Sirius disturbingly of Orion Black. 

Dumbledore looked to everyone else. "I do have considerable information to impart about Harry. Information on which you may eventually need to act."

No one spoke. The hatred and anger in the room hovered like thick acrid smoke, choking everyone in its path.

"I am not proud of what I did to Harry or to Sirius but it was necessary for the greater good." Dumbledore regretted his words the moment they came out. His mind flashed to Grindelwald. His friend. His enemy. His...but that's not important now....

"Sounds like a very Slytherin thing to say," Euphemia spat.

"I'd like to hear about my son," Lily said quietly. "And then I'd like you to leave." 

Dumbledore allowed sadness to flit across his eyes for a brief moment and then continued. "Sirius, your death was not part of the plan at all. In fact, as I learned too late, you were providing a valuable service just in keeping Harry on some sort of even keel. After your death...well, Monty, I can't imagine you'll find anything to say to me that is worse than what your grandson has already said."

"Don't expect my sympathies," Fleamont snarled.

"I do not, I assure you. In fact, Harry blaming me for Sirius' death was far preferable to what came after the initial anger which was Harry blaming himself. His failure to learn occlumency...something he still has not learned, I might add...is his greatest personal failure. Sirius, you were the closest thing he'd had to a father and his failure got you killed. I did everything in my power to take the blame after that. I shouldn't have asked Severus to teach him occlumency. I underestimated how much Harry hated him, how difficult it would be for him to control his emotions with Severus. I also underestimated how much Severus hated Harry, how much he saw James there when he looked at him." 

"If you would have warned him about the prophecy, he wouldn't have been lured down there in the first place," Sirius said. 

"I understand that now. I should have told him everything when you begged me to and I will regret that...apparently, for eternity. I've told him everything now. He knows everything I do," Dumbledore assured them. Almost everything anyway. "Death seems not so bad for you though, Sirius. Much worse for those you left behind, I think."

Sirius didn't disagree. How could he disagree with Aurora holding his hand and his family surrounding him. "I never would have left him, Albus. Not even for this. You know that."  
"I do...but I think we can agree that it was a choice better taken away from you," Dumbledore said softly. 

Sirius nodded slightly. He was far happier in death than he had ever been in life. To deny that would be a lie. "I still wouldn't have left him to deal with this mess on his own."

"He's not alone...or if he is, it is his choice. There are many who would be happy to help him deal with 'this mess' and with your loss if he allowed them to," Dumbledore said. 

Tears welled in Lily's eyes. Her son, lost and alone, was too much to bear.

"I don't think you understand what he's going through if you honestly believe that," Sirius said sadly. "The damage you did leaving him in that horrible, loveless house..." 

Dumbledore bit back a smile. "I always thought Molly got it wrong when she accused you of confusing Harry with James. Beyond the physical, there's little similarity between them. He is far more like you, far more your son than he is James and Lily's," Dumbledore stated quietly. 

A flicker of jealousy flitted acrossJames' face.

"I thought perhaps Remus could reach that part of him the way he could reach you but rather than becoming caregiver, I'm afraid Remus has been the one who needed care," Dumbledore explained.

"Is he alright? What happened?" Sirius asked.

"What happened? His best friend, the last of his family, died in front of him, Sirius. He threw himself into work after that, volunteering for increasingly dangerous missions. If it weren't for Nymphodora, I daresay he would have been here before me. Keeping him alive has become her full time job." 

"So I failed to dodge a stunning curse and ruined everyone's lives," Sirius said sadly. 

"You died and people who loved you mourned. For a couple of those people, they had no more heart left to break," Dumbledore said gently.

Sirius dropped his head into his hands. Aurora laid her face on his head, put her arms around him. He tried to stay focused on her light instead of the darkness eating away his insides but the darkness was winning as images of devastated Harry and suicidal Remus flashed through his head.

"Harry did have one person who succeeded where the rest of us failed," Dumbledore continued. "It would seem that even in the darkest night, Luna Lovegood could still get through to him. Interesting that their parents seem to have found each other as well." 

"Luna?" Aurora lifted her head from Sirius' and looked at Dumbledore in surprise. Sirius looked up at him as well. 

Dumbledore tried to ignore the old, haunted look he'd seen in those gray eyes so many times after Azkaban. The look he saw again now. I did this to him in life and now I'm doing it again in death. But they must know.... "I was not privy to all their conversations, but it would appear that Luna kept Harry from some of the worst of his impulses right after Sirius' death. Perhaps simply being able to confide in someone who had felt the pain of losing a parent was balm enough." He smiled slightly at Aurora. "And, in my experience, it's quite hard to stay in the dark when confronted with pure light which is how I would describe your daughter."

"That's not surprising," Sirius murmured. Aurora kissed him gently and he allowed the light to wash over him. He wasn't back there. He was here and he was safe in her arms. Stay focused on that.

Dumbledore smiled slightly, heartened by the change in Sirius' demeanor, and continued. "I did force him to return to the Dursleys last summer. The protection spell was too important to break though you'll be happy to know that Remus and Arthur went to Privet Drive and 'scared the bloody hell out of the muggles' in your absence."

"Good," Sirius said. "Harry had them convinced I was going to come and eat their entrails if they stepped out of line," he explained to James and Lily. "The only thing that kept them in line was fear."

"I had hoped for a bit more love or even civility than I got with them but in the absence of love, acquiescence would have to do. " Dumbledore settled back in his chair. "Which brings us to the series of events that leads me to your sitting room on this beautiful summer's day." 

"Did Snape kill you?" Sirius asked.

Everyone but Aurora looked surprised.

"I'm sure Severus had nothing to do with this," Lily insisted.

Sirius looked to Dumbledore for an answer.

"Yes," Dumbledore answered slowly. "Severus did kill me but not for the reasons you may be thinking."

Lily gasped. 

Sirius and Aurora exchanged a look of confirmation.

"May I ask how you knew?" Dumbledore had his suspicions. He'd been struggling not to stare at Sirius' hands from the moment he saw him in the In Between. "Those marks on your hands...the sight has returned?"

Sirius looked surprised for a moment. "Yes. Last night. I thought it was a dream but..." he trailed off. "What was Draco Malfoy doing there? Why didn't you defend yourself?"

"Draco...your cousin became a Death Eater right after Lucius was thrown into Azkaban for his role in the prophecy room battle. The youngest since your brother, I believe," Dumbledore said. 

Sirius winced at the mention of Regulus and his ill fated career as a Death Eater which began on Regulus' 16th birthday. A mere two years later, he was dead. A wasted life, Sirius thought. A weak minded idiot making a horrific decision.

"Draco felt he had no choice but to defend the family's honor and no doubt he was right about having no choice. Voldemort assigned him the task of killing me and I re-assigned that task to Severus," Dumbledore said.

"You wanted Snape to kill you?" James asked confused.

"I was already dying," Dumbledore explained examining his previously withered hand. "A nasty run in with a cursed ring, I'm afraid. Stupid really. I knew it was probably cursed but I just couldn't resist... My death was imminent. It seemed silly to waste it when it could be used to secure Severus' position at Voldemort's right hand."

"He didn't want to do it," Sirius stated.

"No, he did not. He was quite furious with me over the whole situation as I'm sure you could see from your vantage on the astronomy tower," Dumbledore told Sirius.

"So Harry's left to fight the war on his own then?" James asked. "You've just abandoned him?"  
"The ring?" Sirius asked, ignoring James' question, suspecting that the truth was much worse than that. He feared the answer but asked the question anyway. "Was it a horcrux?"

Dumbledore looked surprised.

"What's a horcrux?" Lily asked.

"How did you know?" Dumbledore asked. 

"A couple of months before I died, Remus and I had a bit of a row during which some not very nice things were said about how I was handling what we had jokingly been calling my 'Azkaban brain'. He'd grown tired of my depression and self-medicating and, to be honest, so had I. But that house...if I was going to be alone and sober in that house, I needed a significant distraction so I decided to read every dark arts book in the Black family library. Know thine enemy as the muggles say. Not surprisingly, we have a considerable collection."

"And you discovered horcruxes?" Dumbledore asked.

"I discovered a lot of really terrible, disgusting things but the one thing that seemed to explain what happened in the graveyard, that diary, the prophecy...was horcruxes. I'd planned to tell you about my discovery but then...I died."

"An excellent deduction, I'm afraid," Dumbledore said.

"The part I didn't understand though...if the diary was destroyed, how did Peter bring him back in the graveyard?"

"You're assuming he only made the one horcrux."

"Considering what it takes to make one, I was indeed assuming that," Sirius uttered, looking nauseous. "At least until I heard about the ring. How many did he make?"  
"After much research including dangling the "Boy Who Lived" as bait for Horace Slughorn who served as unwitting mentor to a teenaged Voldemort, I believe he created 7 though only 6 were intentional." Dumbledore watched Sirius' face. Would he draw the same conclusion? The residue in the diary, the residue in Harry. He could see by the devastated look in the other man's eyes that he had.

"The receptacle has to be destroyed to destroy the horcrux?" Sirius asked unable to look at James and Lily.

"What the bloody hell are the two of you talking about?" James asked edgily.

"It does," Dumbledore said quietly. "There is no other way that I know of...for sure."

Sirius looked at him quizzically. "Is there a way that you think could work?"

"It would require Harry to possess the elder wand and for everything we think we know about the elder wand to be absolutely true and then...."

"The elder wand?" James asked incredulously. "I don't know what this horcrux is but I can certainly look at Sirius' face and see that it's bad and you're talking to us about fairy tales????"

"The elder wand is not a fairy tale, James," Aurora said. "The story is told in that medium but it's based in reality." She looked at Dumbledore. "The master of the elder wand can not be defeated. You think that a killing curse would destroy the horcrux but the elder wand would protect its master?"

Dumbledore nodded. "I think there is some possibility though untested...."

"What's an elder wand?" Lily asked. 

"You know, Beadle the Bard," James said dismissively. "The children's fairy tale about Death giving these brothers gifts...."

"Gifts like your invisibility cloak," Sirius said looking James in the eyes. 

Fleamont looked thoughtful.

"Not you too!" James said.

"That cloak is not wizard made, James. I've seen it, spent time examining it, and it's not wizard made. It's not charmed, it's not transfigured. It's...other."

"I would agree. Obviously," Dumbledore said. "I've been chasing the hallows for years if truth be told. The cursed ring...."

"Resurrection stone?" Aurora asked.

Dumbledore nodded.

"You were able to destroy the horcrux but the stone?" Aurora asked.

"Remained in tact," Dumbledore confirmed.

Sirius looked somewhat hopeful.

"Have you all gone daft?" James exclaimed.

"Our invisibility cloak has been handed down for countless generations," Fleamont said. "No one really knows its origin for sure though we are descended from Ignotus Peverell who is presumed to be the youngest brother. The recipient of the cloak."

James considered this.

"What do the hallows and horcruxes have to do with Harry?" Lily asked.

"He has the invisibility cloak, of course, and I left him the resurrection stone," Dumbledore said. "If events proceed as expected, I thought perhaps having some solace and courage from his parents wouldn't go amiss."

"You'd like us to walk Harry to be sacrificed?" James asked incredulous. He'd put most of the pieces together and was ready to pummel Dumbledore with his bare hands.

"What are you talking about?" Lily cried. 

Sirius turned to her not really wanting to be right but knowing that he was. He'd known for quite some time if he was truly honest with himself. "When Voldemort tried to kill Harry as a baby, the spell ricocheted and came back on Voldemort."

"I know that," Lily said.

"I told you about the parselmouth, the visions, seeing through Voldemort's eyes. The curse left a residue in Harry. A piece of Voldemort. The horcruxes...they're receptacles with pieces of Voldemort's soul in them so that as long as there are horcruxes that aren't destroyed, Voldemort is, for all practical purposes, immortal." 

"No...." Lily felt the tears coming. "No....."

"I'm so sorry," Sirius murmured. "Neither can live while the other survives." 

"The only way to destroy Voldemort is for Harry to die first," Fleamont breathed. 

"The elder wand?" Sirius asked Dumbledore. "Do you even know where it is?"

"I possessed the elder wand. I've had it for decades since winning it from a...dear friend. " Dumbledore thought of Grindelwald for a moment. Is he here? Unlikely. "Unfortunately, this is where the best laid plans for my death went astray. It was my intention to have Severus kill me thus transferring the elder wand to him. I left him with instructions for Harry explaining the last horcrux. Severus was then to allow Harry to best him and take the elder wand and then he would have all the hallows. No one had ever possessed all the hallows. There could be great magic there...."

"But you weren't holding a wand when Snape killed you," Sirius said.

"I overestimated the courage of Draco Malfoy. While he didn't have it in him to kill me, he did have it in him to disarm me."

"Draco Malfoy has the elder wand? Harry's only hope of getting out of this?" Sirius asked hopeless again .

"I'm afraid that he does. Though with the animosity between them, there is some chance that Harry will acquire the elder wand on his own. Their duels have escalated in a quite disturbing manner this year. Draco barely survived the last one."

"Harry wouldn't hurt someone," Sirius spat. 

"Harry did hurt someone, Sirius. Had Severus not arrived when he did, I daresay Harry would have killed someone." Dumbledore looked at Sirius a bit sadly. "Your death...broke him. He's not the boy he was, Sirius."

"He may not be the boy he was, but he's not bad," Sirius said. "He is a good man."

"He is but very bad things have happened to him and it's beginning to take its toll," Dumbledore said gently. "I know it's hard to hear....""Then stop saying it," Sirius muttered. "His heart is good. And it was Draco Malfoy. I'm sure he wasn't the innocent victim you're making him out to be. He's a Death Eater for Merlin's sake. I'm sure he goaded Harry into it." He remembered his own teenage run in with a Death Eater in training. He may not have been right to endanger Snape but Snape was far from innocent. No doubt the same was true of Draco. 

"I didn't say Draco was innocent but Harry used sectumsempra on him. He most likely didn't know exactly what it did but he knew that it caused harm and he used it anyway," Dumbledore said. 

"Just stop. Please," Lily begged.

Dumbledore acquiesced realizing the pain he was causing Lily. "Draco's near death did wake Harry up a bit though. You're not wrong, Sirius. He is a good man but I believe there was a period where too many bad things had happened and he had lost his confidante when you died...."

Sirius looked devastated. He'd been happy all these months while Harry suffered. 

"Alas, Ginny Weasley picked this time to fall into the category of something good happening."

Sirius felt his heart lighten. "Harry and Ginny finally figured it out? I thought Project Harry was never going to get anywhere despite Tonks' dedication to the cause," he said thinking fondly of the smart, sassy red headed girl who had confessed her hopes and fears to him and to his cousin. He couldn't think of a better mate for his godson. 

Dumbledore almost laughed. "Yes, Grimmauld Place did end up creating some romances and Ginny and Harry happened at a very good time for him."

Sirius smiled for the first time in what felt like hours. He turned to James and Lily. "You'd really like her. Smart, brave, not afraid to tell people when they're being wankers about something. Really, she reminds me a bit of you, Lily." 

Dumbledore smiled a bit as well. "Ah yes, she does a bit though a bit of her brothers in there as well particularly the twins. I don't think we'd quite trust her with a prefect's badge."

"You trusted Remus Lupin with a prefect's badge!" Lily said incredulously. "Remus. Lupin."

"Moony was an excellent prefect," Sirius defended.

"The best prefect ever!" James agreed.

"I do apologize, Lily. Minverva and I honestly did believe that he would hold some sway over these two."

"He did not," Lily said wincing at painful memories.

"Oh he did," Sirius assured Lily. "He just chose not to exercise it." 

James almost laughed. "How is Remus really?" he asked Dumbledore.

"I'm afraid I haven't seen that much of him since Sirius' death. Arthur and Molly have been trying to keep track of him, make sure he's fed, clothed, not too sick. And Nymphodora has been volunteering to accompany him on missions whether she's welcome or not. There's no real saying no to her." He turned to Sirius. "Like you, she'll do what she wants."

"Black family trait," Sirius smirked. "Her mother married a muggle born after all. That's as rebellious as it gets for my family."

"So what does this mean for Harry?" Lily asked softly.

"It means that Albus expects Harry to allow Voldemort to kill him," Fleamont said eyeing Dumbledore suspiciously. "Which brings us back to why my son had to go to Azkaban. Because he would have taken Harry and you never would have found him to sacrifice him."

"That was a consideration," Dumbledore admitted.

"You were right," Sirius confirmed. "My first thought was Amazon rain forest. We wouldn't have resurfaced." He sighed. "I should have taken him after Azkaban. Remus and I could have managed it. Would have had I realized...though it would have been a lot more difficult. He wants to fight. He'll sacrifice himself like this without hesitation. You've raised a perfect sacrificial lamb," he said bitterly glowering at Dumbledore.

"He never would have forgiven you or himself had you taken him," Dumbledore said.

"Maybe not but he'd have a long life in which to hate me," Sirius said. "He would have known what it was like to grow up happy and loved."

"How long?" Lily asked.

Dumbledore looked at her quizzically.

"How long until my son dies, Albus? How many of these horcruxes are left?" Lily asked.

"The diary and the ring have been destroyed. Harry and I retrieved Slytherin's locket though Harry will need to destroy it. That leaves something of Hufflepuff, something of Ravenclaw, and Nagini, Voldemort's snake...."

"And then my son," James said coldly.

"What did you say about the locket? Salazar Slytherin's locket?" Sirius asked.

"Yes, you've probably seen it growing up. I believe your father had it before Voldemort turned it into a horcrux," Dumbledore said.

" I didn't just see it growing up. I saw it last summer!" Sirius insisted. "As did Harry though he may not have realized what it was."

"That's not possible. That horcrux was hidden prior to the end of the first wizarding war," Dumbledore puzzled.

"I don't know but I saw it last summer. Felt it actually. It felt absolutely awful which is saying a lot considering its location." Sirius shuddered thinking of Grimmauld Place.

Dumbledore blanched. This can't be but.... "Do you believe it may still be at Grimmauld Place here? We must find it, Sirius."

Sirius shook his head. "I've no idea if Grimmauld Place even exists here." 

"It shouldn't," James said. 

"It would seem that there is...this place...and some other place," Dumbledore said. "That impacts people but...places?"

"It's not like I've dropped by to find out," Sirius snapped. "I never want to see that place again."

"I am afraid that is not an option. I may need you to get in," Dumbledore said. "This is critical, Sirius."

Sirius sighed. "Fine. Let's go." He stood.

Aurora stood also clearly planning to accompany them.

"No," Sirius said softly "You stay. I don't want..."

"I know you don't but I'm going," Aurora said gently but firmly.

"We're going too," James said. 

"No arguments," Fleamont said before Sirius could argue. 

Sirius looked defeated. "Let's go then," he said holding out his hand to them.


	21. The Ancient and Noble House of Black

The street outside Grimmauld Place felt wrong as it always did. Sirius marveled at the muggle ability to ignore such things. He whispered the password and his childhood hell appeared between the beaten down Georgians that lined the block. 

"Impressive," Lily murmured.

"My father was nothing if not impressive," Sirius muttered.

"Terrifying more like," James added.

"Absolutely," Sirius agreed. "So let's get this over with." He climbed the stairs and reached inside the letter box pulling out a small knife. He cut his hand and let the blood trickle over the door knob. There were other ways to get in, of course, but what the house really wanted was blood and he complied. The doors swung open, the spells all disabled at once. He sighed and entered. Would he never be able to leave this place and not return?

The others tried to stifle cries of shock and disgust as they continued through the front hall to the parlor. Sirius tried to pretend he didn't hear them. 

Aurora could barely breathe in this place. The dark magic was palpable like toxic smog. She couldn't imagine how Sirius had survived living in this house even as a child let alone after Azkaban. She took his hand, offering strength, comfort, light.

Sirius felt Aurora take his hand and felt better as he always did. He wrapped his fingers tightly around hers. She would need to bring every bit of light inside her to deal with this abyss of evil. "Last I saw it was in a drawer in the drawing room," he said leading the way. He opened the door to the drawing room and was sent sprawling by a stunning curse. "What the hell...." He struggled to his feet and looked around noticing that everyone was staring shocked in the same direction. He followed their eyes to...what the hell? "Regulus?" Sirius asked stunned by more than the spell.

"Sirius?" Regulus asked (played by Ben Barnes). His voice sounded hoarse and far away. When was the last time he'd spoken? He couldn't remember. "Sirius? Is that really you?" Could this really be? Or another hallucination or figment of his imagination or final proof of insanity.... 

Sirius took three steps toward his brother. "Reg, what...." He had a thousand questions but they all stuck in his throat as he looked at the once handsome boy before him. Because he was a boy, dead at 18, but he looked more ghost than human. Haunted, half crazed, sunken, blackened eyes, almost translucent skin. "Reg...." He took the last step and hugged the boy suddenly not caring that he was a Death Eater, not caring about the past at all. He felt the boy stiffen but he didn't let go. "It's me, Reg."

Regulus didn't recall the hallucinations ever touching him before. In fact, he couldn't remember anyone ever touching him before. "Sirius?" he asked daring to hope that his brother really was there. He tentatively hugged Sirius back finding him quite corporeal. He clung to him after that. He was real, he was real, he was real....

Sirius pulled back a bit to look at his brother. "How? What...?" He tried to formulate the questions but there were too many.

Regulus slowly became aware that if Sirius was real so was the crowd of strangers in his drawing room. He peered at them. Not all strangers. Headmaster Dumbledore. James Potter, of course. His brother never went far without HIM. The red haired woman next to James looked familiar. Lisa? Laura? A Gryffindor. Perhaps a prefect? He vaguely recognized the other man. Potter's dad. He'd come for Sirius' things after.... The older dark haired woman must be James' mum. The blonde woman he didn't remember having ever seen.

Sirius realized Regulus was staring uneasily at the crowd. "I think you know most everyone, Reg. James and Lily. Albus Dumbledore. Our parents and..." 

Regulus flinched slightly. "Our" parents....

Sirius looked at Aurora and she joined him near Regulus. "...my wife, Aurora."

Regulus looked surprised. Tried to work out the time, the place. How long had he been here? "Aurora...." He remembered his manners and extended his hand. "A pleasure to meet you." Sister-in-law. 

Aurora took Regulus' hand and held it for a moment. Regulus felt...better. He looked at her questioningly and she smiled slightly. "Nice to meet you too." 

"Can you tell us what happened to you, Regulus?" Dumbledore asked articulating the question with which Sirius was struggling.

Regulus seemed confused by the question.

"How did you die?" James asked helpfully.

Anger flashed in Regulus' eyes for a heartbeat and vanished. The replacement brother. He hadn't thought of James Potter in a long time but when he used to.... It hurt to think about. 

"How did you die, Reg?" Sirius asked gently. "You realized you didn't want to be a Death Eater and ran away. Did they catch you?"  
"What?" Ran away? "What are you...." The haze that had surrounded Regulus' thoughts lifted suddenly replaced by indignation. "I didn't run away!!!" The look of surprise on his brother's face was infuriating. "I'm not a coward! I didn't run! I died trying to stop that monster! " He knew he was yelling but couldn't seem to get himself under control as years of anger and frustration poured out. "You think because I'm not in Gryffindor, I'm a coward? I'm not! After I realized what he was doing, I stopped him. I made him human! Your lot didn't even know what he was about. You were trying to kill him but he couldn't be killed so I made him mortal! I DID THAT. I never ran!" He felt his anger turning to exhaustion. "I never ran...." He felt Sirius' arms around him and tried to shove him off. "I never ran..." Sirius wouldn't let go of him and he felt tears coming. Don't cry. Don't show weakness. "I never ran..." he whispered crying into his brother's hair. 

"Okay, Reg...it's okay...." Sirius said rubbing his brother's back, instinctively trying to soothe.

"I believe we have solved the mystery of the second locket," Dumbledore said quietly. "Regulus, did you perhaps leave a fake in place of the real locket?"

Regulus tried to discreetly dry his tears and pull away from Sirius but Sirius still wouldn't let him go. Insisted on standing there with his arm around him like they were brothers instead of enemies. "Yes. I...I left a note. In the locket. I...I wanted him to know who made him mortal. I wanted him to know that the Blacks had turned their backs on him," he said with the slightest hint of arrogance. A whisper of a ghost from a bygone era when there were Blacks and not just Regulus alone and afraid and half insane inside this forgotten crypt. 

"Did you happen to sign the note, Reg?" Sirius asked.

"With my initials. RAB."

"What's the likelihood of Harry realizing who RAB is?" James asked.

"Harry?" Regulus asked.

"Possible, I suppose. He's seen the family tree. I pointed out Reg. His middle name is on there. He knows Reg was a Death Eater. Close to Voldemort. It wouldn't be an obvious path though," Sirius explained.

"Who's Harry? What's he to do with this?" Regulus asked.

"James' son," Sirius said. "It's a bit of a long story but he's been tasked with finding the horcruxes and he thought he'd found the locket but it's the fake."

"Horcruxes?" Regulus asked. Realization. Horror. "He made more than ONE?"

"Several more, I'm afraid," Dumbledore said.

"So I died for nothing? It didn't even do any good?" Regulus choked on the hysteria he heard seeping into his voice. It was all for nothing. He may as well have ran. 

"No, no, not for nothing," Sirius assured him. "What you did was so brave, Reg. I've never been more proud of you."

Sirius' words meant more to Regulus than he cared to admit. He felt the tears coming again but forced them down. "Kreacher was supposed to destroy the real locket."

"He didn't," Sirius said.

"Or couldn't," Dumbledore corrected. "They're nearly impossible to destroy. I had to use the sword of Gryffindor on Marvolo Gaunt's ring and the only other object I've seen used successfully was a basilisk fang."

"I"m sure there are basilisk fangs around here," Regulus said. "He could have used that."

"He didn't, Reg. I saw the locket a few months before I died, perfectly in tact. It's why we're here," Sirius explained. He felt Regulus sag against him as the full weight of their words hit him. He tightened his grip on his brother's shoulders. 

"What can we do to help...Harry?" Regulus asked commitment to the cause giving him something to focus on instead of the flickers of insanity that danced around his brain. Please let this be real, he thought. This has to be real.... He tentatively put his arm around Sirius testing his corporeality again and finding him solid. He let out a sigh of relief. No hallucination could feel this real. 

"He needs to know who RAB is. He won't even know where to look for the locket otherwise," Fleamont said. 

"We can't tell him. We can't communicate with the before world," Lily said. She kept her other thoughts to herself...if Harry can't find the locket then Harry can't sacrifice himself. 

Sirius touched his wrist discreetly. Aurora looked at him. Should I say? he thought to her. Yes, she thought back. "I think I can raise the veil," Sirius said to the group.

"Not for long," Aurora clarified. "Moments at most."

The others stared at them dumbfounded.

"And we need to think about the consequences of showing ourselves to anyone in that world. To let them know that this world exists," Aurora continued. 

"Did you just say that you can raise the veil between worlds?" Dumbledore asked incredulously.

Sirius almost laughed. "I"m not sure I've ever seen you shocked before and I've demonstrated some fairly shocking behavior." 

"Why do you think you can raise it?" James asked.

"I can see it," Sirius answered. "I have been able to see it since our marriage."

"You can see it too?" Dumbledore asked Aurora.

"No. We think it may be because he wasn't actually dead when he went through the veil," Aurora explained.

"How did you die?" Regulus asked his brother.

"Bella," Sirius replied.

Regulus chuckled bitterly . "Figures. Andromeda owes me 10 galleons."

"I'm surprised she took that bet," Sirius replied.

"I think she wanted to believe that her sister would come around." Not that you had such faith in me. "I assume she hasn't then?" Regulus asked swallowing his other thoughts.  
"Not even close," Sirius assured Regulus.

"So we just lift the veil, tell Harry where to find the locket and that's it?" James asked.

"I'm not exactly sure where the locket is," Sirius admitted. "It's in the house somewhere probably. I knew what it was -- that it was Slytherin's locket not that it was a horcrux. We didn't throw it out. I remember arguing with Kreacher about it...that makes more sense now."

"Were you living HERE?" Regulus asked incredulously. "With Mother and Father?"

"Here yes. With them? NO! They died years ago. Rotting elsewhere where they belong, aren't they?" Sirius snapped. 

Regulus grimaced. They were still his parents after all. They'd been mostly nice to him if only because he'd never given them a reason not to be. He remembered his 15 year old brother lying on the floor in this very room bleeding and broken and decided to let it go. "So how does this veil thing work?" He asked Sirius. "You just lift it up and then Harry can see you?"

"We're not entirely sure," Sirius admitted. "I've only made it flutter a bit so far. I believe lifting it would require a great deal more concentration...and we'd need to be in the same place here that Harry is there. There would be no time to go there and look for him."

"How would we even know where?" Lily asked torn between wanting to see Harry, to talk to him, after all these years and wanting to keep him from ever finding the locket.

"If time passes the same there as here, it would be summer. He would be at the Dursleys. Arthur and Remus would insist on keeping that protection until he turned 17," Dumbledore said.

"The trace would be on him until his birthday anyway. He couldn't be safely moved," James added.

"Wouldn't Voldemort know that though?" Sirius asked. "They should move him prior and catch them unawares."

Regulus nodded in agreement.

"May I remind you that the last time you tried to outthink Voldemort, James and Lily died and you ended up in Azkaban," Dumbledore said.

Sirius winced.

"Azkaban?" Regulus asked incredulously. 

Fleamont glared at Dumbledore. "Do not ever believe that your invitation in my home extends beyond this locket business."

"I am under no such delusion, Fleamont," Dumbledore said tersely.

Regulus looked surprised by the ill will between men he assumed would be allies. And how could Sirius have ended up in Azkaban? And why was he living at Grimmauld Place? Parents or no parents, Sirius hated this house.

"Perhaps we could continue this discussion somewhere less...wrong...," Euphemia suggested. 

"Please," Aurora said looking physically ill.

Everyone nodded. Sirius turned to Regulus. "You too."

"What?" Regulus asked in confusion. "I live here." Whatever living consisted of anyway.

"You're not staying here, Reg. You look like utter shit and you're coming home with me."

"He can stay in the guest room, the poor dear," Euphemia said putting her arm around Regulus who was surprised to find how nice her voice sounded and how warm her arm was. Maybe he could go for just a little while....

They all returned to the Potter House.


	22. The Prodigal Brother

Euphemia settled Regulus on the couch with some tea and biscuits. She'd never seen anyone look so wan, so frail though there didn't seem to be anything physically wrong with him. She settled herself beside him determined to nurse him back to health.

Fleamont smiled slightly at his wife and her kind heart, knowing they'd just taken in another stray.

"So what's the plan?" James asked.

" Let us perhaps start with a demonstration of feasibility," Dumbledore suggested. "If the veil can not be lifted, there is no need to plan."

Sirius nodded and focused on the slip of veil that he could see and no one else could. He slowly, arduously raised the veil and everyone gasped as the ruins of the Potter house came into view.

"What happened to my house?" Euphemia cried.

Her voice startled Sirius and the veil came crashing down, the ruins gone.

"Sorry," Euphemia cringed.

"So it IS possible," Dumbledore mused.

"But should we do it?" Lily asked. "Aurora's right. We have to be careful not to reveal this world to the before world. If they knew, it might change their actions...."

"We could find a way to tell Harry without showing ourselves," Regulus said. "Leave him a note or something." He was surprised that he had spoken, surprised to see that he had eaten like a dozen biscuits. When was the last time he'd eaten anything? Had wanted to eat anything?

Euphemia smiled at Regulus. More biscuits came floating in from the kitchen.

Regulus tentatively smiled at Euphemia.

"I'm not sure that we can interact with that world to that extent," Aurora said. "We wouldn't be corporeal in that world."

"If we could find him sleeping, we may be able to convince him that we're a dream. Some sort of premonition," Sirius suggested.

No one offered any better ideas.

"So to Little Whinging then," Sirius said and they all apparated into Harry's bedroom in their world.

Sirius lifted the veil again. This thing is made of lead, he thought. They all looked around the room but it was empty.

"His trunk's still here," James said. "He can't have left."

"I doubt that he would take his trunk, James. He won't be returning to Hogwarts," Dumbledore reminded him.

"He'd take our map, the invisibility cloak, his wand. Probably not much else. Look for those things," Sirius gasped. "Quickly."

The others scoured the room but found nothing.

"There's a wedding on his calendar for tomorrow," Regulus noticed. "Who are Bill and Fleur?"

Sirius collapsed and the veil fell with him.

"Sirius!" Aurora ran to him followed by the rest.

"He's bleeding!" Lily exclaimed pointing out the blood coming from his nose.

"What should we do?" James asked terror rising in his voice.

Regulus looked on with concern, surprised that he felt concern, surprised that he felt anything. "Is he okay?"

Aurora cradled Sirius' head in her lap. "Sirius, can you hear me?" She gently wiped away the blood with her sleeve. "Open your eyes, love."

Euphemia knelt beside them checking for a pulse.

Sirius blinked a few times looking around at all the frightened faces. "What happened?"

"You passed out," Regulus volunteered.

"You held the veil for too long," Aurora explained, stroking his hair. "How do you feel?"

"Like the morning after a bottle of firewhiskey," Sirius grimaced. "Did it work?"

"He wasn't there," Lily said. Was that relief on her face?

"Who are Bill and Fleur?" James asked remembering what Regulus had said.

Aurora helped Sirius to sit up, still supporting his weight.

"Bill is Ron's brother. Fleur is...." Sirius' head was pounding and while Fleur sounded familiar, he couldn't place her.

"The veela to whom he is engaged," Dumbledore finished. "Harry wouldn't miss their wedding if he could help it."

Sirius tried to shake off the excruciating migraine. "They'd get married at the Burrow. What was the date?"

"Tomorrow," Regulus said.

"Then we try again tomorrow night," Sirius said.

"You'll do nothing of the kind," Euphemia scolded him. "You can hardly sit up on your own and the veil was barely open for a minute. I understand the importance of this but I won't risk your health for it."

"I agree," Lily said quickly, too quickly.

"If we don't do it, then Harry could wander around for years looking for that locket all the while Voldemort would become more and more powerful. It must be done," Sirius stated. "It's just a headache. I'm fine, Mum."

Regulus started a bit on the word "mum". If this woman was "mum" than who was he to Sirius?

"I can help with the headache," Aurora said. "Also I think that we can all help him hold up the veil."

"But only Sirius can see it," Lily quickly reminded everyone.

"This is true but if we can channel our magic through him, I believe we can help keep it open once he's lifted it," Aurora explained.

"It's worth a try," Sirius agreed. "And who doesn't love crashing a wedding?" He tried to laugh and then winced.

"James, Regulus, go find wolfsbane and heather. Euphemia, do you have any dungwort in the kitchen?" Aurora asked directing the troops to action.

"Of course, dear."

Everyone apparated off on their assigned tasks while Euphemia and Aurora took Sirius home.

*****************************************

Wandering through the Forbidden Forest with James Potter was not how Regulus thought he would be spending his day when he dragged himself out of bed that morning. Not that he had made plans of any sort. Every day, he sat in the house. He used to try to read but in the last few years, the voices and hallucinations had made it difficult.

"I think I see some wolfsbane over there," James said and pointed.

Regulus followed James over to the plants. James started to grab for one but Regulus stopped him. "They have to be dug up or they'll lose their effectiveness." Did this git even go to Herbology?

They knelt beside the plants and began to dig.

"So...what have you been doing for 18 years?" James asked trying to make conversation.

"Oh you know, the usual. Blood sacrifice, torturing babies," Regulus replied his voice dripping with sarcasm.

James flinched.

"It's what you all think of us anyway," Regulus said bitterly.

"If by 'us' you mean Death Eaters then why don't you tell me what I should be thinking," James said. "I don't think that dark mark refers to a secret society where you all braid each other's hair and eat chocolate frogs."

"You wouldn't understand," Regulus said.

"Because I'm a blood traitor?" James asked. "Because I didn't get sorted into Slytherin? Because I didn't have to prove I wasn't anything like my brother?"

"Fuck you," Regulus said angrily.

"The rebellion to Sirius' rebellion," James said. "Couldn't do it though, could you? In the end."

"You have no bloody clue what you're talking about. As usual," Regulus said icily. "You don't know what I did or didn't do and you certainly don't know why I did it."

James grabbed Regulus' arm. "Don't even think about it."

Regulus looked mildly surprised.

"I recognize the 'I'm about to storm off' tone," James explained. "You're a lot more like your brother than you'd care to admit. And he'll be devastated if I lose you so if you're going to storm off, you're going to have to take me with you."

"That would greatly defeat the purpose," Regulus spat.

"Then let's agree to a truce, take the herbs, and go home," James suggested.

What home? Regulus thought but allowed James to apparate with him.

**************

Sirius sat in bed dressed in pajamas. Like a child, he thought. He dutifully accepted the potion from Aurora, took a sip and almost vomited.

"This is, by far, the most disgusting thing I've ever put in my mouth including that month in fourth year where we spent every waking hour tricking each other into drinking the most vile things we could think of."

"Stop being a big baby and drink it," Aurora ordered.

"What's in it for me if I do?" Sirius asked.

Aurora's glare said it all and Sirius poured it down his throat like a shot. His face turned green but he managed to keep it down. "Was that actual rat dung or did it just taste like it?"

"How would you know what rat dung even tastes like?" Aurora asked. "No, don't answer. I don't need to know."

Sirius moaned slightly as the potion took effect. He felt like his brain was melting and dripping down his spine but the pain and the nausea were melting too.

"Better?" Aurora asked.

"Much," Sirius confirmed and then grabbed Aurora and pulled her into bed with him. "Now about my reward."

"You were unconscious a few minutes ago. Your reward is resting," Aurora informed Sirius, extricating herself from his grasp and moving to the foot of the bed.

"I don't think you understand how this reward thing works," Sirius grumbled though he obediently lay back on the pillow. "Did Mum get Regulus settled?"

"I believe he's in the room next door," Aurora confirmed. "That was a bit of a surprise, aye?"

"A bit," Sirius agreed. "I'd no idea at all."

"You never talk about him," Aurora said. "Were you ever close?"

"Yeah, we were. When we were little," Sirius said quietly. "Inseparable in fact but then...."

"You went to Hogwarts and got sorted into Gryffindor," Aurora guessed.

"That really changed me," Sirius said. "Maybe changed is the wrong word. I think that was always who I was but I'd never been anywhere, around anyone, where that was acceptable let alone encouraged. That house...you saw it. I'd always found it upsetting, found them upsetting. I just didn't really understand why until Hogwarts but once I understood, it was a bit hard to pretend. Being in that house even for a day was torture. Pretending to agree with them was impossible and so I'd argue and they'd get angry, sometimes violently so, and Regulus would beg me to shut up about it and just agree with them, get along, you know?"

"But you couldn't," Aurora said.

"But I couldn't. He could though and I couldn't understand how he could. He either agreed with them and was a monster or pretended to agree with them and was a coward. Either way, we became a lot more...separable. I thought maybe if he got sorted into Gryffindor but it didn't happen. Him being in Slytherin...really by the time he became a Death Eater, we hadn't spoken in any sort of meaningful way in almost three years. Really not at all after I came to live here. Of course, he was happy to speak to me long enough to show me that mark on his arm."

_Flashback_

_Regulus stood beside the Quidditch pitch with his broom in his right hand. He couldn't stop staring at his left arm. The weight of it. It still burned from the night before when the Dark Lord had etched the mark into his skin. He could feel the dark magic of it coursing through his entire body. Bellatrix said it would feel like power but it didn't. It just felt...bad._

_"Oi Reg!" Sirius called from behind Regulus._

_Regulus turned to see his brother approaching with a Honeydukes bag. He quickly rolled his left sleeve down but not before he saw the flicker of recognition in Sirius' eyes._

_"Please tell me that's a tattoo of a naked girl on an anchor," Sirius said quietly knowing it wasn't._

_Regulus said nothing for a moment. "You know what it is."_

_"So you've done it then," Sirius said. His voice was calm but his stomach was churning and his head was spinning between grief and rage. "I figured you would but I'd hoped...." He couldn't hide the disappointment, the sadness in his voice. "You know what they'll ask you to do, Reg. How could you agree to it? This isn't you. I know it's not."_

_Regulus bristled at the tone, at the insinuation. That he was a coward. The opposite of Sirius. He felt the icy rage cascading over him. "You don't know anything about me. You've barely spoken to me in years. We're strangers."_

_"We're brothers," Sirius said softly._

_"We stopped being brothers when you became a...Potter," Regulus spat the last word. "You betrayed our family. Our ancestors. Our name. Our blood."_

_"Reg, come on. You don't believe that pureblood rubbish. I know you don't," Sirius implored._

_"You don't know what I believe. I'm glad Mother disowned you. She was right. About ALL of it," Regulus said coldly. "ALL of it."_

_Sirius bristled knowing what "all of it" entailed. He felt the icy rage rising in his throat. Rage that he wanted to give to Bella, to his parents, not to Regulus. "You should have stood up to them. To Walburga and Orion. To Bella. You didn't have to do what they wanted. You don't always have to do what they tell you to do."_

_"I chose this," Regulus said quietly._

_"Then you're a monster," Sirius said equally quietly. "And you're right. We're not brothers." He threw the Honeydukes bag at Regulus. "Happy 16th birthday," he snarled. He turned and walked away. He didn't see Regulus' face shift from anger to sadness._

_End of Flashback_

"We never spoke again," Sirius said quietly.

"And now?" Aurora asked.

"And now he's next door and he looks like he's been through hell and he did this extraordinarily brave thing, stood up to all of them at the cost of his life and all I can think is that maybe if I would have been a better brother, tried harder to reach him...."

Aurora crawled over to sit beside him at the head of the bed. "You were children."

"I'm not sure Reg and I were ever really children," Sirius said softly with pain in his eyes.

Aurora leaned over and kissed him gently. "You can have your reward now," she whispered wanting to take away his pain.

Sirius kissed Aurora deeply, rolling over on top of her, feeling the burning, all consuming need to be inside her. He felt her trying to unbutton his pajama top, ripping the buttons in her own desperate need.

"Why the bloody hell are you wearing these things? What was I thinking...." She ripped more buttons before remembering that she was a witch and could just spell them off. Clothes finally out of the way, Sirius pushed into her. She shifted her hips to allow him deeper access, moaning as his fingers worked their magic, skillfully pleasuring her until she cried out.

Sirius kissed her trying to keep her quiet. "Regulus is asleep next door," he said breathlessly as he continued to thrust into her, forcing her to climax again stifling her moans with his lips. Her shuddering orgasm was too much to resist and he came inside her, burying his face in her hair to keep from crying out. He lay on top of her, trying to catch his breath, to stop the world from spinning. She clung to him, still spasming around him, her legs wrapped around his hips. He lifted his head and kissed her gently. "That potion is a miracle drug," he smiled.

"I can see that. Feel that," Aurora smiled. Sirius kissed her again and then slid off her and rolled over, pulling her with him.

"I think your pajamas are ruined," Aurora said apologetically.

"I think that's probably for the best," Sirius whispered, kissing Aurora's head. They were laying still together when there was a scream from the room next door. Sirius half sat up. "I should probably check on him," he said, staring at Aurora's naked body and wondering if his baby brother really needed to be checked on or not. He gently twirled his finger around her nipple, making it hard. "Or maybe he's okay...."

"Go!" Aurora ordered, pulling the sheet over her nakedness.

Sirius pulled on his pajama pants and a Chudley Cannons t-shirt and walked into the guest room without knocking, laughing slightly when he saw the Gryffindor banners on the walls. Moony used to stay in this room when he visited. He turned to the bed and saw Regulus tossing and turning, mumbling in his sleep. He lay down beside him and laid his arm over his brother's chest the way James and Remus had done for him a hundred times.

Regulus woke up and looked at Sirius, was startled and sat up quickly. 'What the hell are you doing in my bed?"

Sirius looked sad for a moment as he realized that comfort wasn't really something that he and his brother did for each other. Not this brother anyway and not since they were very young. He almost got up but thought better of it. 18 years alone in Grimmauld Place. Reg needed help whether he knew it or not. He sat up and faced his brother. "I used to have nightmares. At Hogwarts," he explained. "Particularly bad ones right before and right after breaks especially. And when they were really bad, either James or Remus or sometimes both would crawl into bed with me and it helped."

Regulus looked at him incredulously. "Are you gay?"

"Not like that." Sirius said. "Just for comfort. You'd be surprised how someone giving you a good spoon scares away nightmares," he stated matter-of-factly. "So when I heard you screaming in here, I thought..." He looked sad. "But I guess that's not the Black Way."

Regulus listened trying to wrap his head around this new information and how it fit with his perception of his "never scared of anything" brother. He couldn't seem to make the new information marry up with his perception though. "I thought you didn't care what they said, what they did. You said you didn't give a fuck. Numerous times."

"I lied," Sirius said softly. "I did give a fuck. A huge fuck actually even though Merlin knows I didn't want to. But every time she sent a howler, every time he called me a blood traitor, a disappointment, every time she...every time she hurt me, I gave a fuck and I hated myself for giving a fuck and pretty much all of that self-loathing came out in the form of horrific nightmares."

Regulus considered what it would feel like to have friends who loved you so much that they would curl up next to you just so you could have a peaceful night's sleep. "It really helped?"

"It did," Sirius confirmed softly.

Regulus laid back down. "Can we...." He wasn't even sure how to ask for such a thing.

"Of course," Sirius murmured, laying back down and putting his arms around his brother.

********************************************************************  
Sirius sat in the garden enjoying the morning sun when James joined him, handing him a cup of coffee.

"Mum is force feeding Regulus every breakfast food known to mankind," James said.

"Good. He looks awful," Sirius said. "Like death."

James sipped his coffee quietly gauging whether Sirius needed additional prodding or not.

"He was having nightmares last night," Sirius said. "So I slept with him though it took a lot of convincing."

James considered how to phrase his point. "You weren't exactly brothers or even friends when he died."

"I've got plenty of guilt already, James. I don't need you piling on."

"Not exactly my point. We did try to help him, Pads."

"Did we? When was that? Because I've been trying to remember one time when I ever specifically tried to help him after he was sorted into Slytherin and I can't think of one and he clearly was reachable..." Sirius felt tears in his voice and stopped. "What he did...I should have tried harder."

"WE should have tried harder," James corrected.

"He wasn't your brother," Sirius said. "I should have gone back. I shouldn't have left him alone with them."

"Now you're just being ridiculous," James said. "They would have killed you had you gone back. You had to take care of yourself."

"You don't understand! You don''t have a brother," Sirius said.

"Bollocks," James said. "You may not be blood but you are my brother and I understand feeling like you should have done more. I feel that way every time I think about you in Azkaban."

"That wasn't your fault," Sirius said.

"It was more my fault than Regulus becoming a Death Eater was your fault," James insisted.

Sirius was silent.

James sighed knowing that he'd lost the argument.


	23. Wedding Crashers

"I don't understand why we have to wear dress robes," complained James.

Regulus, looking like he was bred to wear dress robes, gave James a haughty "were you raised in a barn?" look.

"It's a wedding, Prongs!" Sirius said for the fifth time. "We have to blend in!" 

"You look quite fetching, my dear," Lily assured him. In a much quieter voice, "they'll look lovely on our bedroom floor later."

James perked up at this suggestion and stopped fiddling with his clothes. 

"So everyone's clear on the plan? I lift the veil, then the rest of you help and then once we're there, I'm going to try to get Hermione's attention," Sirius reminded them resplendent and comfortable in dress robes despite a life spent avoiding such things. 

"You're sure she can handle this information?" Aurora asked for the fifth time. 

"She's our only hope. Harry can't know, Ron can't not tell him, but Hermione can see reason," Sirius assured everyone. "She could have been a Ravenclaw."

"With Sirius dead, Harry won't have told anyone else about the horcruxes but Ron and Hermione. Ms. Granger is our best hope," Dumbledore agreed. "One concern though. Sirius, are you sure Hermione will recognize you?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't she? I don't look that different."

"Yeah, you do, Pads. You look like you now but before you looked...well bloody awful," James said. "I didn't even know you could look that bad."

"That's a little hurtful, James," Sirius said. "You try 12 years of Azkaban and see how your alabaster skin takes to it," he snapped. 

Regulus furrowed an eyebrow at this comment. What the hell happened to his brother? 12 years in Azkaban ?

"Anyway, she'll believe me and I won't attract the attention that Dumbledore would," Sirius insisted.

"So let's do this," Aurora said. "Lead the way to the Burrow."

Sirius apparated them to the Burrow. "I think probably in the garden." They walked behind the house. 

"Interesting architecture," James murmured. "Must be some sort of sticking spell to keep that fourth level from falling off."

Regulus looked up. "More than one, I would think." A very odd looking house and yet something about it quite appealed to him. 

"Ready?" Sirius asked. 

Everyone nodded. 

Sirius focused on the veil and lifted. The others touched him channeling their magic to him. "Much easier. Not quite light as a...veil...but much better."

The veil lifted to reveal a wedding reception in full swing. The bride and groom kissed happily on the dance floor. 

"There's Harry," Sirius said. "Looks like he's trying to pass for a Weasley." He pointed toward a dark corner where Harry and Ginny were barely dancing, lost in each other. "Project Harry going splendidly then. Maybe he doesn't need parents spying on him though...Lily," he said in an accusatory tone. 

Lily watched her son dance with the pretty red haired girl clearly in love with her. She felt the tears welling up, wanting so much to reach out to him, to meet her, to be a part of their lives, to know her grandchildren. She took a step toward them but James gently held her back. 

"We can't, Lily," James said thickly, fighting back his own tears. "He looks really happy."

Sirius' heart broke for them. "She'll make him happy, Lily. She'll be his family now." 

Lily wept quietly against James' shoulder. He lay his head on her head and watched his son from afar.

The music selection sped up and a blond girl whirled onto the dance floor with red haired twins. All three were dancing like no one was watching and were clearly having a great time doing it. 

"Luna!" Aurora cried and took an involuntary step toward her daughter. She stopped herself and then felt Sirius' arm around her waist pulling her against him. "Who are the boys?" she asked.

"Fred and George Weasley," Sirius answered. "Ron's brothers and two of the most brilliant minds I know. Outside of myself and James of course."

James tried to laugh but seeing Harry and not being able to talk to him was crushing him.

Regulus too found himself drawn to the laughing, dancing threesome though he wasn't sure why. The twins were about the age he was when he died, he supposed. 

Aurora watched her daughter, soaking in every moment. Her smile, her laughter, her beautiful face....

"And there are Moony and Tonks!" Sirius said excitedly. He knew he'd feel the pain later, that missing Remus was something he'd been able to compartmentalize since coming to their world. That he would pay for that compartmentalization soon enough. 

"She has pink hair!" Lily said shocked. 

"Did I not mention that my dear cousin was a metamorphmagus?" Sirius asked. "Must have slipped my mind."

"Better that than a parselmouth, I suppose," James said. 

"Could have easily happened," Sirius agreed. 

"Our cousin?" Regulus asked dragging his attention from the twins to the pink haired woman.

"Nymphodora Tonks. Andromeda's daughter," Sirius explained.

"With the mud...muggle born," Regulus corrected himself. Old habits....

"Is she pregnant?" Euphemia asked.

James and Sirius looked questioningly at Dumbledore who shrugged. "I am not privy to those intimate details."

Regulus noticed Sirius starting to look peaked. "Where's Hermione?" he asked. 

Sirius looked around the garden for her crazy curly hair and almost missed the beautiful woman she'd become. Had she not been yelling at Ron, he may not have recognized her at all. "She's there. We need to get her attention."

"How?" Regulus asked.

"Go ask her to dance and then lead her over here," Sirius said as if that should have been obvious. "Don't touch her though because I'm not sure you can."

"This is your plan?" Regulus asked skeptically.

"It is!" Sirius confirmed. 

Regulus sighed. "Well, I've done worse things."

"Just be careful that Ron doesn't punch you!" Sirius suggested.

"I'm pretty sure I can take him," Regulus assured him.

"I'm pretty sure he'd punch air which would raise a lot of unanswerable questions," Aurora told her brother-in-law. "Now go ask the pretty girl to dance."

Regulus dutifully walked toward Hermione who was storming away from Ron in a huff. She almost ran into Regulus but he sidestepped her and then stepped back in front of her making her stop without touching her.

"Where are you off to in such a rush?" Regulus asked smiling at her charmingly. Getting girls to talk to him, really not an issue. 

Hermione looked at him in surprise ready to trample the ego of any male who dare speak to her but then she saw him and nearly gasped. "I...I wasn't going anywhere," she said. Lame answer.

"In that case, would you do me the honor of dancing with me?" Regulus asked motioning her toward the dance floor. "I'm not sure I could live without a dance with you."

"That is a really cheesy line... What was your name?" Hermione asked thinking he may be the most beautiful man she'd ever seen in person despite his pallor.

"First, it's not a line. You are really beautiful," Regulus said with absolute sincerity. "And I really want to dance with you. Second, my name is...Richard. Richard...White."

"Hermione Granger," she said politely offering her hand.

Regulus looked at her hand like it might bite. Instead of taking it, he gestured gracefully toward the dance floor and to his great relief, she came with him. He looked over at his brother and could see blood dripping from Sirius' nose. "Let's dance over here." He danced toward the group leading Hermione with him. They were a mere two feet away when the patronus appeared warning everyone that the Ministry had fallen and then the Death Eaters were there and it was chaos. He looked for Hermione but she was running, everyone was running. The panic, the fear was palpable as they ran from the men in the mask that he once wore with pride. He hated himself in that moment and then they were gone. The veil...and his brother...had collapsed.


	24. RAB

Back at the Potter house, Sirius found himself laying on the couch choking down another dose of Aurora's potion. "I believe it tastes even worse." 

"So what now?" James asked. He sat on the other couch with his arm around his distraught wife. Seeing Harry had broken both their hearts but James intended to distract himself with this stupid locket. 

"I don't know," Sirius admitted. "They could be anywhere now. On the run."

"There were so many," Aurora murmured curling up next to Sirius. "They were terrifying."

Sirius put his arms around Aurora and pulled her close. "It's over now."

"For us but what about for Harry? And that girl...." Lily fought back tears. 

"Ginny," Sirius supplied. 

"And Luna...." Aurora said.

"I'm sure they got away," Sirius said.

Regulus brooded by the fire, lost in dark thoughts. He subconsciously massaged his arm. The mark had starting burning the moment the Death Eaters showed up, still burned though he knew it had to be psychological now. 

"You okay, Reg?" Sirius asked.

"Fine," Regulus lied.

"Excellent job luring Hermione by the way," James said. 

Regulus looked sick. What if she didn't get away? And Aurora's daughter? The laughing, dancing twins?

Sirius seemed to read his mind. "They got away, Reg. She wasn't hurt."

Regulus looked at Sirius with haunted eyes. "I'd never seen...felt...it from that perspective. The terror...." He rubbed his arm more violently as if trying to rub the mark off. 

"Did you recognize them?" Dumbledore asked Regulus.

"They wore masks," Lily said.

"Yes," Regulus admitted. "Antonin Dolohov, Bella, Rodolphus, Fenrir Grayback, a couple who I didn't know. Not Lucius or Cissy," he said to Sirius. "Not Severus either."

"Is your arm still burning?" Sirius asked Regulus, watching his brother's increasingly frantic efforts to rub the mark off.

"As soon as they appeared, it burned and it won't stop," Regulus said. "I want it to stop. It has to stop." He focused on his arm and the skin started to flay.

"No!" Sirius shouted. "Don't...." He and James both jumped up and ran to Regulus. Sirius grabbed Regulus' marked arm, breaking his focus. "No."

"I don't want to be a Death Eater anymore and even here, it burns," Regulus cried. "I can't live with it."

"You can or you can learn to," Sirius said gently. "Maiming yourself isn't the answer." He sat beside his brother and put his arm around him. 

"You're sure they're okay?" Regulus asked softly.

"Hermione? Yes, I'm sure. We'd have known by now if she were dead," Sirius said. 

"But they could be hurt," Regulus worried. He couldn't get the image of the dancing twins out of his head. So full of life and innocence. Hermione and Luna as well. They were all just so...young. Had he ever been that young? That innocent?

Sirius almost smiled. "Apparently, she made a bit of an impression on you, huh? I feel I should warn you that Walburga would definitely NOT approve. Muggle born, that one."

"So muggle born, Gryffindor, I assume anyway and not dead," Regulus said. "Perfect for me. Exactly what I deserve."

"Reg...." Sirius began.

"Don't. I may have turned my back on them, tried to stop Voldemort but I joined them in the first place, Sirius. I have participated in I can't even remember how many of those raids, terrorizing people just because they didn't agree with us. That was me for the two years before I died. I deserve to have this stupid mark burn for eternity," Regulus spat, angry at himself, hating himself. 

"You made a horrible mistake, Reg, and you're sorry for it and you tried to make it right. You have to forgive yourself now," Sirius said softly. 

Aurora touched her wrist and thought, excellent advice, love. Maybe you should take it?

Sirius smiled at her ruefully. He knew she was right but the forgiving was so much harder than the knowing.

Regulus stared into the fire with haunted eyes trying not to think about what the Death Eaters would be doing to those innocent dancers right now if they hadn't gotten away. He could almost hear the Crucio! and the screaming.

"So what now?" Fleamont asked. "Harry just wanders the earth looking for the locket? Wondering who the hell RAB is?"

"He could be anywhere," Lily said. "How would we even know where to look?"

"Well, probably not anywhere," James corrected. "They're being hunted by Death Eaters, it's late, Harry still has the trace on him...they'll need to hole up somewhere safe for the night."

"Grimmauld Place," Sirius said suddenly. "They'll go to Grimmauld Place. Harry owns it now and it's as secure a place as they'll find on short notice."

Regulus registered that James' son owned his family home but didn't have it in him to argue the point. What did it really matter?

"Harry may believe that Severus betrayed its location to the Death Eaters. I'm afraid the fidelius charm died with me," Dumbledore said.

"What choice do they have?" Sirius asked. "We have to go back to Grimmauld Place." He stood up quickly and swayed violently almost passing out again.

"You're not going anywhere until you've rested," Aurora told him. She took his hand and apparated them to their room. 

"I'm fine, really," Sirius protested as she pushed him down on the bed. "Though I could think of something to do...." He snaked a hand around her waist but she sidestepped. 

"Rest," Aurora said softly. "You held the veil open for close to 30 minutes and now you need to rest."

Sirius sighed and laid back on the pillows. "Will you rest with me?"

Aurora smiled. "That I can do." She laid down on the bed and rested her head on his chest, snuggled closer as his arms went around her. 

"Are you okay?" Sirius murmured, his face in her hair. "Seeing Luna?"

"I will be," Aurora said. "It hurt, of course. To see her and not be able to touch her, to talk to her but the joy in just seeing her..." She looked up at him. "It was a gift. A beautiful gift that I'll remember long after the pain fades." 

"You can see her again if you want," Sirius said softly. "I could...while she's sleeping...."

"I do want," Aurora said. "But I can't have. Ours is not to live in their world no more than theirs is to live in ours." She laid her head back down on his chest. "But it was really wonderful to see her. Smiling and laughing. With friends all around her." She felt herself choking up.

"Don't cry, love," Sirius murmured, comforting. 

"They're actually happy tears," Aurora assured him. "Mostly happy anyway." 

******************************************************

"I really hate this place," Sirius grumbled as he dropped his blood into the letter box. The wards disengaged and they all traipsed into the drawing room.

"So you're just going to lift the veil in every room until we find them?" James said.

"If we find them," Lily corrected.

"What if they're awake?" Regulus asked thinking this plan didn't seem very well thought out. 

"Then I will drop the veil immediately and hope they think we're ghosts," Sirius answered. "We'll start here." He raised the veil.

James almost tripped realizing that he was an inch from standing on Ron's head.

Regulus saw Hermione asleep on the couch and smiled a bit. At least one of the dancers who'd been haunting him had escaped. 

"So they're here," Sirius said. 

"No Harry though," Lily said. 

Sirius dropped the veil. "Maybe giving them some privacy. We'll try his room. This way." He led the group to the next floor, carefully avoiding looking into the master bedroom where he'd spent so many dark days, so dark that it felt like the dementors were still there with him. Even Padfoot had only helped a little. He moved on quickly to the room that Harry had shared with Ron and opened the door. He raised the veil but the room was empty.

"Are they here alone?" James asked.

James' voice made Regulus' skin crawl. Probably something to keep to yourself, he thought. You won't come out on the winning end of making Sirius choose. 

"No. Hermione would never have left the wedding without them both. He's here somewhere." Sirius walked back down the hallway and forced himself to look in the master suite. Empty. Of Harry anyway. He felt the dementors creeping out of the walls.... Aurora sensed his terror and took his hands. 

"Put it down, love," Aurora whispered. 

Sirius dropped the veil and felt the dementors vanish back into the recesses of his brain. "I really hate this place," he moaned. 

Regulus flinched. Of course, he hates this place. Only horrible things happened to him here, Regulus thought trying not to think about the good things that happened here. The endless happy hours they had spent playing Arthur & Lancelot, zooming around the Quidditch pitch in the attic, building blanket forts and pretending the blankets were like the invisibility cloak in Beedle the Bard and that their parents would never find them. But Sirius hated this place....

They explored the third floor without success. 

"We didn't open up the fourth floor," Sirius explained. "He's never even been up there." 

"What's on the fourth floor?" Aurora asked.

"Our rooms," Regulus answered. "May as well check."

The group ascended the stairs to the fourth floor and entered Regulus' room at the top of the stairs. 

Regulus suddenly felt very aware of the Slytherin banners on the walls. Did he put them there to rebel against the Gryffindor banners in Sirius' room? Was James right? The idea of James being right about anything made Regulus want to punch something. James took his brother away. He wasn't allowed to be right.

Sirius raised the veil in Regulus' room but no Harry. They continued down the hallway to Sirius' room.

Sirius hesitated outside the door. 

"Are you okay?" James asked.

"Just haven't been in here since...." Sirius trailed off. He knew James knew. 

James clapped him on the back. "We're all right here. No ghosts allowed. Except us, of course," he grinned. 

Regulus glared at James, wanted to roll his eyes at the cheesy line, point out the insincerity of it all but there was no insincerity and deep down, Regulus knew it. Knew James truly loved Sirius, would do anything for him. Knew he was jealous of James and hated himself for it. 

Sirius took a breath and opened the door to his childhood room. He'd almost forgotten what it looked like. Gryffindor banners, motorcycles, naked muggle girls. The room of a much younger man, he thought. "Ready?" he asked.

They nodded.

Sirius raised the veil and found Harry sleeping in his bed. 

"Guess he wanted to be close to you," James said quietly. He felt the small pang of jealousy he always felt when he thought about Harry and Sirius. That Sirius got to be his father and James never would. He didn't resent Sirius for it, was happy they had each other, but it hurt just the same.

Sirius sat down on the bed beside Harry . Harry stirred a bit but didn't wake. He looked so like a child when he slept. Sirius was momentarily overwhelmed by how much he missed him, his godson. Even having James back, they weren't interchangeable no matter what Molly Weasley thought. "Harry?" he murmured softly into the boy's ear. "Harry? Wake up a minute."

Harry stirred blinking his eyes unable to focus on the blur but thinking that voice sounded familiar. Like a long lost security blanket. "Sirius? Is that you?"

"It's a dream, Harry. Just a dream. But Harry, I need you to remember something. RAB is Regulus Arcturus Black. You've seen the locket before, Harry. In this house." 

Harry murmured, "RAB is Regulus...."

"That's right. You need to remember when you wake up, Harry," Sirius reminded him.

"Sirius, I miss you," Harry said in his sleep. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I let him trick me. I love you."

Sirius blinked back tears. "I love you too, Harry, and you're not to blame for my death. Death isn't even so bad. I'm here with your parents and we're happy but we all miss you terribly. We love you."

James and Lily sat down beside Harry as well. "We love you so much, son," James whispered. 

"We'll love you always, Harry. Even if you don't do what Dumbledore wants you to do," Lily said.

Aurora touched her wrist and thought, enough.

Sirius felt the tears rolling down his cheeks. "I love you, Harry. "

Aurora put her hand on Sirius' shoulder and said, "enough. Let it fall."

Sirius let the veil fall. The room was empty again except for the group of people though not a single one of them would have suggested that the room was anything but empty.

****

Later that night, Sirius lay in bed listening to Aurora's steady breathing. Seeing Remus and Harry had awoken all sorts of memories that he'd steadfastly kept locked up since coming here. He had James and Lily and his parents and Aurora and it was easy to pretend that was enough but then he'd seen Harry sleeping in his bed looking so innocent and so vulnerable and the guilt over leaving him was crushing. Not just because he needed physical protection but because he needed someone who he could say anything to and Sirius knew that no one could completely fill that role. And now Harry would have to face what was coming absolutely alone with only Voldemort's thoughts for company. He looked at his sleeping wife. If he could, would he leave all this behind to help Harry? Yes. In an instant. He wondered if this was what fatherhood felt like. The willingness to sacrifice every bit of your own happiness to give your child even a moment of peace. It certainly wasn't how it was defined in the Ancient and Noble House of Black but he thought that might be how Fleamont Potter would define it and it seemed right. He suddenly understood the true meaning of Fleamont taking him from the Blacks, that he was willing to risk his life to give him, Sirius, a moment's peace. He felt tears in his eyes thinking about his true parents. They loved him like he loved Harry. Blood didn't matter.

Of course, none of that mattered where Harry was concerned, Sirius thought, because there was no way back. Harry had to fight this battle on his own and all Sirius could do was wait.


	25. The Great Wall

Regulus sat on a rock beside a stream behind the Potter house skipping stones a bit too angrily to make them actually skip. 

Sirius climbed out to the rock and sat down beside Regulus.

"You need to throw them lightly," Sirius suggested.

Who asked you? Regulus thought. "Thanks for the tip," he said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Did I do something to piss you off?"

"Of course not. How could my perfect brother manage that?"

Sirius looked as if he wanted to say something but then chose not to engage. "I was thinking maybe you and I could go away for a few days."

Regulus looked surprised. "Just us? What about James?"

"We can invite him if you want but I thought it might be nice if it were just us. If we could maybe sort some things out between us."

Regulus considered this for a long moment. "Where would we go?"

"Wherever you want. Except Grimmauld Place. I just can't be there. And Iona in Scotland. Long story. And Amsterdam though I think their problem was more with James than me. Oh, and chunks of Australia. That was all me, I'm afraid."

Regulus laughed a bit. "Anywhere else? Antartica still okay?"

Sirius laughed. "For the present."

"I've always wanted to see the Great Wall of China," Regulus said.

"China it is! Can we try to find Shangri-La while we're there?"

"Of course. It would be a wasted trip if we didn't," Regulus agreed.

******************************************************

"The Great Wall was a bit of a bust. Seems like an impedimenta spell would have served them just as well. The Mongols got in anyway," Regulus said.

"Muggles can't do an impedimenta spell so they build walls. They're quite ingenious really, the way they find workarounds to not having magic," Sirius said. "Like can't apparate? No problem. Build a tube that flies when you pour stuff in it."

"I've seen those. In the air anyway. Look like death traps," Regulus said. "I think I'd rather just have magic. I guess some of them do too."

"Do you really think muggle borns steal the magic? How would a child even do that? Even a magical child can't control magic so how would a muggle child manage it?" Sirius reasoned. 

"So what's your explanation for it?" Regulus asked.

"Don't know. Maybe a few generations of squibs and then the magic comes back," Sirius said. "Aurora said that magic used to be the norm thousands of years ago but then non magical people used their gods and fear to rise to power and it became safer to forget magic. Some continued to practice in secret like our ancestors but most simply forgot over the generations. Maybe Muggle borns come from the people who forgot." 

Regulus considered this for a long moment. "You really think there's no difference between pure bloods and mud...muggle borns?"

"Obviously, there's a difference at first as they catch up but overall, it doesn't seem like it. Lily's no less powerful than us and I've certainly seen pure bloods who aren't all that impressive."

"True. I mean, it's not like I think that muggle borns should be killed or anything and you're right, it's never seemed very plausible that they could steal magic. It's just...."

"Hard to reconsider everything you were raised to believe?" Sirius asked. 

"Slytherin didn't require any reconsideration."

"Gryffindor did and I'm glad of it," Sirius said. "Even though Walburga and Orion made me pay for it pretty much daily for years, I was never sorry that hat said Gryffindor. Not once."

"I begged the hat not to put me in Gryffindor," Regulus confessed. "The thought of going through what you did...it wasn't worth it to me." 

"I was begging the hat to put you in Gryffindor," Sirius said. "That would have made me so happy."

"Why?" Regulus asked genuinely confused. "You already had James and the other two. What did you need me for?"

"You're my brother!" Sirius cried shocked that he had to explain. "Of course, I wanted you to be in my house. More than anything."

"Am I? Your brother?" Regulus asked the question that had been simmering just beneath the surface for decades.

"Why would you ask such a thing?" 

"You call the Potters Mum and Dad. James is clearly more your brother than I ever was. Remus too. They were the ones you confided in, the ones who comforted you. You became an animagus for Remus!"

"What? We didn't...how did you..." 

"Don't bother to deny it -- you and James aren't that subtle. The Death Eaters knew."

Sirius looked surprised. 

" I get it though," Regulus continued. "Our parents were awful to you and I don't blame you for leaving. I don't blame you for replacing them but you replaced me too." Do not cry. "And you replaced me way before the day that you left. We were barely even speaking by then."

"Reg, no, I didn't...."

"No. Look, it's fine. I get it. We chose opposite sides. I have this mark on my arm that stands for everything you hate. I stand for everything you hate."

"No! Regulus...."

"Just don't bother." Regulus vanished.

"Bloody hell."

********  
Fleamont and James played one on one on the quidditch pitch in the backyard as Lily and Aurora watched from the garden, sipping tea. Fall was giving way to winter and the air was crisp. Leaves piled on the ground, the piles growing with each rustling wind. 

Sirius appeared and sat beside Aurora.

"You're back early," Aurora said kissing Sirius. She looked at his face. "I take it it didn't go well."

"Not at all. We got into a fight and he took off to who knows where," Sirius said sadly. "I should have known he wouldn't be here."

"What did you fight about?" Lily asked gently.

"James. The Potters. Mostly James though. He says that I replaced him with James."

"Did you?" Aurora asked.

"No," Sirius said immediately and then thought about it. "Not intentionally. No. James isn't a replacement. He's my best friend. My....."

"....brother?" Lily finished.

"So I have to choose between Regulus and James?"

"I think the problem is that you HAVE chosen between Regulus and James," Lily said. "Or at least that's how Regulus sees it. And he's not entirely wrong, Sirius. I've known you since we were 11 and I think I've maybe met Regulus like twice before we found him at Grimmauld Place." 

"He was in Slytherin. What was I supposed to do? Just show up in their common room?" Sirius asked. "You know how they were after I got sorted into Gryffindor."

"Yeah I do. Does Regulus?" Lily asked.

"I don't know."

"Did you ever invite him to the Gryffindor common room?" Lily asked. 

Sirius didn't answer.

"No. Of course not. Because you were trying so hard to make everyone forget that you had cousins and a brother in Slytherin. Trying so hard to make everyone forget your last name." Lily took Sirius' hand. "Not that you had to try that hard. Everyone in that house judged you on your merits, on you just being your obnoxious, lovable self. Nobody cared that your last name was Black other than you. You were ashamed...."

"I was not ashamed of him...not exactly."

"I'm sure it wasn't easy for him having a brother in Gryffindor," Aurora said quietly. "Even worse when he was a Death Eater and that brother was in the Order of the Phoenix."

"It still doesn't make James a replacement," Sirius said. "Or Remus."

"I know that," Lily said quietly. "But I'm not the one who lost my brother and was left surrounded by really terrifying people that I couldn't trust."

Sirius sighed and dropped his head into his hands knowing that Lily was right.

************************************************************

Sirius stomped up the stairs to Grimmauld Place, grabbed the knife, cut himself and poured the blood into the letter box. The wards lifted and he entered. 

"Regulus!"

There was no answer but Sirius could see some evidence of someone living there. He walked downstairs to the kitchen and found his brother drinking alone.

"This house really does encourage alcoholism, "Sirius said.

Regulus looked up, sighed, and returned to his tumbler. 

"Fine. Don't talk to me," Sirius said sitting down and helping himself to the firewhiskey. "You've had your say so now you're going to listen to mine." 

"I'm riveted," Regulus snarled. 

"I'm sorry."

Regulus looked momentarily stunned but quickly hid it in the tumbler.

"I didn't think about how my actions must have looked to you. How my actions impacted you. When I yelled and complained about how much I hated it here, I didn't realize that you would think I hated you. When I couldn't wait to get back to school, I didn't think that you would think I couldn't wait to get away from you. When I finally left here, I didn't think you'd think I'd left you. I loved you, Reg, but honestly, you didn't make it easy. "

Regulus opened his mouth to defend himself..

"No, that's not fair," Sirius corrected himself. "I didn't make it easy. Being sorted into Gryffindor was like freedom but, in my head anyway, freedom had a price and that price was denying the hell out of who I was before the hat shouted Gryffindor. My name, my family, and...you. I was so afraid that the Gryffindors would reject me that I sort of rejected you and, for that, I am sorry."

Regulus considered this as he studied his tumbler avoiding his brother's eyes. "It wasn't easy to acknowledge you either and be in Slytherin," he admitted.

Sirius nodded and took a long drink of firewhiskey. "What you said about James being a substitute though...it's not true. Is James my brother? Yes and you're right, he's my brother in ways that you haven't been. But it doesn't mean you're not my brother. It's not an either or situation, Reg."

Regulus said nothing.

"Becoming friends with James...and Remus...let me become the person I wanted to be. Not the person I'd been bred and raised to be... and the Potters...I never had a clue what parental love even looked like before them. They took me in when I had nothing and didn't just give me a roof over my head, they gave me a home. A true home. A true home that I would very much like to share with you." Sirius sighed. "I want us to be brothers again, Reg, but I won't give them up for you. Not ever."

Regulus continued to stare silently at his tumbler. 

"You know where I'll be if you need me," Sirius said sadly and walked back up the stairs.


	26. We've All Got Both Light and Dark Inside of Us

Lily, Aurora, and Euphemia sat at the kitchen table drinking tea when James and Fleamont came in from their quidditch match.

"I think it's going to snow soon," James said warming his red and frozen hands by the fire.

"I wonder what Harry's doing," Lily said suddenly. "Do you think he's still at Grimmauld Place?"

"I don't think so, dear," Fleamont said his hands wrapped around a hot cup of tea. "He'll be out looking for the rest of the horcruxes by now."

"I hate not knowing if he's okay, if he's warm...." Lily fretted.

Aurora put her arm around Lily lending comfort and a bit of magic. "At least I know that Luna is at Hogwarts though Hogwarts without Dumbledore? And they'll think she's half blood not pure blood because I never told Xenophilius about the Druids...." Her brow creased with worry.

Sirius appeared then looking as glum as the people in the room. "What's going on?"

"Just wondering where our children are. Whether they'll be rounded up and killed or just sacrifice themselves because Dumbledore told them to," James said bitterly.

"I'm pretty sure my brother would prefer living by himself in Grimmauld Place over speaking to me ever again," Sirius said.

Aurora put her arms around him. "I'm sorry."

"You really think Luna's in danger? Surely they wouldn't really round up half bloods?" Sirius said.

"They absolutely would," Regulus said from behind them. "Pure bloods they consider blood traitors as well. The Dark Lord's ultimate vision is terrifying. Thus the whole risking the inferi to stop it thing."

"Reg, you're back," Sirius said surprised. He hugged Regulus who tentatively hugged him back. "I'm glad you're here. Are you staying?"

"I think I would like to," Reg admitted. "If the invitation is still open."

"Of course, dear!" Euphemia said. "The guest room in the east wing will be yours. You can take down the Gryffindor pennants. Remus put them up so I'm sure it's reversible. He was always such a conscientious boy unlike these other two."

"What?!?" James asked indignant.

"I feel vaguely insulted," Sirius said. "Mum, don't you love us anymore?" He laid his head on her shoulder and gave her the puppy dog eyes.

"You're incorrigible," Euphemia laughed. "Now both of you go get your brother settled and then we'll have a nice dinner during which I don't want to hear the words 'horcrux' or 'the dark lord'."

"Yes Mum," James said. "Come along, Reg, before we start hearing words like "grounded" and "clean out the garage"."

"Definitely you want no part of that garage," Sirius agreed taking Regulus' arm. "It's like the attic at Grimmauld Place without the organizational structure."

"But the attic doesn't have any organizational structure," Regulus protested.

"Exactly," James and Sirius said as the three walked up the stairs.

****************************************

Regulus stared listlessly into the fire in the drawing room. He could hear the others playing some Muggle game in the parlor. Monopoly, was it? He couldn't remember now. He'd begged off, said he was tired. Not entirely true but sometimes....

Aurora came in and sat down beside him. "Sometimes they're a bit much, aye?"

Regulus sometimes got the distinct impression that his sister-in-law was a legilimens of the same or higher caliber as the Dark Lord. "Yeah, a bit," he said quietly.

"It took me a while to get used to them too. Not just the noise but...well, you live alone for a very long time and become accustomed to it."

Regulus nodded. "You were alone before?"

" For 6 years. Nothing like you. But it's a change. A good change," Aurora said. "But it wasn't just being alone. I didn't really grow up like they did. Like James did anyway. This idea of family is a little different."

"Nobody was playing Muggle board games at my house," Regulus said.

"Mine either. Even before I was disowned for going to Hogwarts," Aurora said. "It was all magic and politics and survival."

"Add hating everyone who disagreed with them and it sounds like we grew up in the same place," Regulus said.

"Druids don't hate. They just condescend," Aurora said.

Regulus laughed bitterly. "So you rebelled against them just like my brother did."

Aurora considered this. "There were many reasons why I felt I should attend Hogwarts. I'm not sure rebellion was at the top of the list. I'm not sure rebellion was at the top of your brother's list either. Sometimes things can look like rebellion from the outside though."

"A nice way of saying that I don't know my brother very well," Regulus said a bit more harshly than intended.

"That was not my point though it's true. You don't though he'd like you to."

"Because I stole the horcrux. If I hadn't done that, you wouldn't even know he had a brother. Other than James."

Aurora considered. " That is probably true. The divide would be too large to cross had you not turned on Voldemort. But you did and now there is a chance to be brothers again."

"It's not that easy," Regulus said.

"Of course it's not," Aurora agreed. "So many years of distrust, of enmity can't be glossed over in a single afternoon but I believe it can be overcome if you're both willing."

"Is he really willing?"

"Are you?"

Regulus considered this for a few moments. He thought of the brother before Gryffindor who was his friend, who he spent every waking moment with, who he would have followed to the ends of the earth. The brother who built blanket forts for him in his room so they could hide when Mother was in a mood. The brother who made him feel safe...and loved. He'd like that brother back...but what about the brother who found a new family and abandoned him? Who left him alone in a house full of dangerous people he couldn't trust, who made him feel anything but safe and loved? Could he forgive that brother? Could that brother forgive what he did as a Death Eater? How could he when Regulus couldn't forgive himself?

**************************************************************************************************************

Fleamont and Sirius were in the garage both underneath a Mazda Miata.

"How is Regulus settling in?" Fleamont asked.

"Okay, I guess," Sirius said. "I think he's not quite over being stuck in Grimmauld Place for 18 years."

"Just remember that he's not you, son," Fleamont said. "He chose to stay there. At least in the beginning."

"You think there's something else wrong with him?" Sirius asked.

"I think he's probably dealing with a lot of things and he's doing it in a house full of virtual strangers."

"I'm not a stranger!"

"Aren't you?"

Sirius considered this for a long moment. "I don't want to be but...I don't really know how to get back to a time before...."

"Before you were enemies?"

"Yeah. We were children then. We built blanket forts and had sword fights with beater bats. We're a bit too old for that now."

"You'll have to find a new path forward. A new way to relate to each other. As adults. Adults with a shared past though so maybe build on that but go forward not backward."

"What if he doesn't want to?"

"If he didn't want to, he wouldn't be here, Sirius. He made the first move just agreeing to live here. It's your turn."

"I hadn't thought of that. Thanks for the advice," Sirius said.

"That's what dads are for," Fleamont said. "Now give me that wrench and go find your brother."

***************************************************************************************************  
Regulus sat alone at the grand piano in the Potters' conservatory. He wondered if they ever even came in here. He couldn't imagine any of them as musical. He stroked the keys gently, his long pale fingers caressing softly, sensuously. He began playing Beethoven's Piano Sonata No. 1 from memory, flawlessly, entranced by the music, no magic needed.

Sirius watched him from the doorway not wanting to interrupt what he remembered as Regulus' sanctuary. He'd forgotten how extraordinary he was. How crushed he was when Orion got rid of the piano. A muggle frivolity, Orion said but Sirius suspected that he just couldn't stand to see an ounce of joy in the house and Regulus playing the piano was pure joy.

Regulus finished and bowed his head so that it rested on the top of the piano.

"Still exquisite even after all these years," Sirius murmured.

Regulus was startled as he realized that he wasn't alone but didn't outwardly react. A master at hiding what he truly felt. "How long have you been there?"

"Long enough," Sirius said and walked over to the love seat beside the piano and sat down. "Please don't stop on my account. I've always loved listening to you play."

Regulus made no move to play again, the spell broken as surely as if Sirius had walked in and said finite incantatem.

"It was cruel, what he did. Taking away the piano," Sirius said quietly.

"My priorities were askew," Regulus said imitating Orion's icy demeanor.

"Yes, Merlin forbid that you spend a moment creating something beautiful when that moment could have been spent preparing for the pure blood new world order," Sirius spat bitterly.

Regulus looked stung for a moment. Maybe not such a master of hiding his true feelings.

"I keep doing it, don't I?" Sirius realized sadly. "It's about them not you."

"They didn't make me become a Death Eater, Sirius. I made the choice."

"A choice made at 16! A choice that you regret."

"Yes, but regret doesn't negate my role in all this. I did...horrible things, Sirius. I've..." Regulus took a deep breath, needing to confess his sins and to see if there really was a chance to have his brother back despite them. "I've tortured people. I've...I've killed people. Innocent people. The imperius curse was the least unforgivable thing I've done though I must say even that is a well developed skill."

Sirius had stopped breathing. He wasn't surprised exactly. He'd assumed that Regulus had been an active Death Eater for those 2 years before his death but to hear it.... He knew that his response to this confession was extraordinarily important but he wasn't sure if Regulus wanted absolution or penance. "I understand that it was a choice that you made and I respect you for taking responsibility for it. Blaming Walburga and Orion would have been...easier. But you also made the choice to sacrifice yourself to save others, strangers, innocents, and that has weight as well. I don't know what the balance is though you're here.... I think all you can do now is keep making the right choices and maybe someday, you'll feel that the scales have shifted. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."

"Easy to say for someone who's never made the wrong choice," Regulus said.

"I have most certainly made the wrong choice," Sirius began.

" Choosing Peter as secret keeper, sure, but not a wrong choice like I made. To do horrible things."

"I wasn't speaking of Peter actually," Sirius said quietly, soberly. "You know that Remus Lupin is a werewolf?"

"I've heard the rumors."

"They're not rumors. Fenrir Grayback bit him when he was 5. Revenge against his father. Awful stuff. He's sick for a week before the full moon and hurt for a week after it. What his body goes through...."

_FLASHBACK_

_16 year old Sirius opened the door to the Shrieking Shack letting Remus go in before him and then following him in. Remus was pale, shaking, feverish, his eyes too bright._

_"You should go," Remus croaked. "It won't be long."_

_Sirius hesitated hating to leave his best mate to deal with this alone. Remus would never burden them with the details but Sirius had read every book he could find on lycanthropy and was pretty sure he got the gist of what horrors his friend was about to experience._

_"Sirius, you have to go!" Remus yelled louder than he had intended. Already becoming agitated by the change._

_"I hate leaving you to deal with this on your own."_

_Remus tried to soften his tone, knowing that Sirius was coming from a place of not wanting to see a loved one hurt but he had to be clear. "Sirius, I love that you want to help me and this animagus plan may be a good one but right now, you have to go. I will rip human Sirius limb from limb...or worse...." He felt a rib crack and tried hard not to show the pain. "You have to go NOW!"_

_"Okay. I'll see you in the hospital wing in the morning." Sirius walked to the door and turned back. "Please try not to hurt yourself too badly."_

_The sad and worried look on Sirius' flawless face nearly crushed Remus. Letting them help did help but he hated that he worried them, that now they suffered this too in their own way. He felt his leg break and couldn't stop the pain from hitting his face. "GO NOW!"_

_Sirius left, locking the door behind him. He walked back through the secret passage wondering which bones were breaking now. Maybe it was his own bone breaking experience over the summer but it was excruciating for him to think of Moony being tortured like that. Of any of them being tortured like that but, of course, something like that would never happen to James or Peter. He grabbed the stick and turned the whomping willow back on by habit. Probably both legs broken by now. He didn't even notice Snape in front of him until he'd nearly run into him._

_"Watch where you're going, Black," Snape snarled._

_Sirius looked up at him in surprise. "What are you doing out here?"_

_"I was about to ask you the same thing."_

_"None of your bloody business," Sirius growled at him._

_"Where's Lupin?" Snape asked. "I saw you both walk over here. Lover's Tryst?"_

_Sirius felt a moment of panic. He was sure he'd checked to make sure they weren't followed._

_Snape saw the panic and pounced. "So you are up to something out here in the woods. What is it? Something to finally get you expelled, I hope. There's something strange about Remus Lupin, isn't there? I will find out and I will delight in telling everyone all about it."_

_Sirius was sure that he heard Remus' spine break just then. He couldn't have, of course. The shack was sound proof. Mostly sound proof anyway. "Mind your own fucking business, Snivellus!"_

_"There is something wrong with that nasty little half breed," Snape snarled. "What are you hiding?"_

_"You want to know what we're hiding?" Sirius asked suddenly ice cold. "Go tap that knob over there with that stick. It'll stop the whomping willow and you'll see a secret passage. Be careful what you ask for though, you may just get it." He walked away from Snape, heading back to Hogwarts._

_Sirius had walked halfway back to the school when he ran into James. The rage was still coursing through his veins when he told James what had happened._

_"You did what????" James yelled. "FUCK." He took off toward the whomping willow at a full sprint leaving Sirius to consider the consequences of his actions. Telling James had caused the rage to subside just enough. He couldn't quite bring himself to care about what happened to Snape but when he realized how Remus would feel if he hurt someone...even Snape...the realization dropped him to the ground. "What have I done?"_

_James found Sirius still sitting on the ground when he returned._

_"Is he okay?" Sirius asked rage replaced with desperation._

_"Yes," James said coldly._

_Sirius flinched at the tone in his voice._

_James walked back toward the castle._

_"James!" Sirius yelled after him._

_James didn't turn back._

_The next few days were a living nightmare for Sirius. James wasn't speaking to him which meant Peter wasn't speaking to him and Remus wouldn't even look at him. He'd gone from having a family of best mates to alone in the world in an instant and he had no idea what to do about it. He started hiding until he knew they would be asleep, getting up before them, stopped going to the Great Hall because eating by himself was too painful. Somehow Snape hadn't told anyone what he'd seen which was some miracle unto itself but Sirius felt he would have far preferred a lifetime's supply of detentions to this. Expulsion would be preferable though if he were expelled, where would he go? The Potters? What if James told them? The thought crushed what was left of his heart. He was used to disappointing parents, of course, but these parents who actually seemed to love him and want him.... He was haunted by them turning their backs on him the way his friends had. The rest of the summer at the Potters had been wonderful and not just because of James but because he'd felt like he belonged somewhere for the first time ever. Felt like he had a proper family. And now all that was gone and he had no idea how to get it back._

_It was day 10 after the full moon when McGonagall pulled Sirius aside after transfigurations class. "You'll meet me in my office at 4 today." When all she got was a nod and no witty comeback, no denial of wrongdoing, she knew she'd made the right choice to intervene._

_Sirius showed up at McGonagall's office at 4. Normally, he would have obsessed over what he was being called in for in an effort to prepare a satisfactory defense but he couldn't quite bring himself to care this time. It couldn't be any worse than what he actually did._

_McGonagall opened the door. "Sit down, Black."_

_Sirius sat obediently._

_McGonagall flinched. "Your obedience is absolutely offputting."_

_Sirius looked at McGonagall but couldn't think of anything to say. He'd found that he hadn't been talking much at all since it happened._

_"Clearly, something's going on between you and the others, Sirius. It may help to talk to someone about it and as your head of house...and someone who cares about what happens to you...I'm willing to listen."_

_You wouldn't care what happened to me if you knew, Sirius thought. "It's nothing." He tried to think of a convincing lie but just couldn't muster one._

_"We both know it's a lot more than nothing."_

_Maybe I should tell her, Sirius thought. I'll get expelled. The Potters will send me back to Walburga and Orion which is what I deserve. It can't be worse than this. "I showed Snape how to get into the Shrieking Shack," he blurted out._

_McGonagall's face barely shifted as she digested this information along with confirmation that the Marauders knew about Remus Lupin's condition. "I see. Why would you do that?"_

_Because I'm a horrible person. "He...he made me angry and I...I didn't think it through and Remus could have killed him and he never would have been able to live with himself and it would have been my fault and they're right to hate me and the Potters...." He felt the tears coming and hid his face in his hands. Tears are weakness. He choked them down and composed himself. He looked up at McGonagall. "You should expel me. Let the Potters know that they don't have to be my guardians. They can give me back. I'll understand. It's what I deserve."_

_McGonagall considered this for a moment realizing now that the issue went far beyond James, Remus, and Peter. "I can understand why this may come as a surprise to you but most parents don't actually abandon their children or hurt them when they do something disappointing."_

_Sirius looked at her skeptically. This had not been his experience._

_"Are you sorry?" McGonagall asked._

_"Yes! Of course. I was sorry as soon as I realized what I'd done but it was too late..."_

_"Have you told Remus that you're sorry? Talked to any of them?"_

_"They won't even look at me let alone talk to me."_

_"Have you tried?"_

_Sirius considered for a long moment. "No."_

_"You've made a very bad choice, Sirius. You have to start by acknowledging that and then apologizing for it."_  
_"What if they still hate me?"_

  
_McGonagall looked sadly at this boy who saw the world in such harsh terms. Of course he would. Simply being sorted into Gryffindor had been enough to earn his parents' hatred. How could he see this as being different? "Most people in the world feel a long spectrum of emotions between love and hate. I understand how you grew up but this is not that."_

_"You're sure?"_

  
_McGonagall nodded. "I am. But it may not be easy or quick. Broken trust isn't rebuilt overnight."_

_Sirius nodded and stood to leave._

_"Sirius, my door is always open if you need me. Also you should plan on detention for the rest of the year."_

_Sirius nodded. "Thanks."_

_Sirius made his way to Gryffindor tower on legs that felt like they were stuck in cement. His stomach felt capable of vomiting up its entire contents. Fortunately, he hadn't eaten all day. Really hadn't eat much at all in 10 days. He climbed into the Gryffindor common room in a trance, ignoring those who tried to greet him, walked up the stairs to their room, previously the happiest place on earth, took a deep breath and turned the knob._

_All three were there. Peter and Remus studying. James staring out the window, throwing a snitch into the air and catching it. A habit he'd recently picked up. All three looked up at Sirius as he walked in._

_On his death march up the stairs, Sirius had realized what he had to do. To start anyway. He walked over to Remus' bed. "Can we talk?" he asked quietly._

_Remus considered this request, examined his friend's pale face, dark circles under his eyes, and nodded. He moved a couple of books so Sirius could sit._

_Sirius sat down. His hands were shaking now and he couldn't seem to find his voice._

_Remus looked at him expectantly._

_Peter and James discreetly moved closer to listen._

_"I...I'm sorry," Sirius said quietly and then felt a dam break inside of him as words came tumbling out. "I did a horrible thing. I was angry but that's no excuse. There is no excuse. If something would have happened.... You never would have forgiven yourself and that would have been my fault and I know that hurting someone when you're like that is your biggest fear and I could have made that become a reality and I'm so so sorry, Remus. I'm so sorry." He felt tears in his eyes, knew they were escaping. "I'm so sorry."_

_Remus considered for what seemed like hours to Sirius. "I forgive you."_

_Sirius looked at Remus in utter shock not sure he'd ever been forgiven for anything ever in his 16 years on the planet. "You don't hate me?"_

_"No...you're my best mate and...I mean, I'm not happy about it but you understand what you did was wrong and I hate what you did but I don't hate you."_

_Sirius struggled to grasp this nuance._

_"Your parents really fucked you up, mate," James said, sitting down on the bed next to Sirius. "None of us hate you."_

_Peter sat down on the floor by the bed. "Absolutely not," Peter said assuredly now that James had given permission._

_"Where have you been for 10 days?" Remus asked._

_"Have you been eating at all? I was getting a bit worried," James said._

_"You were worried about me?" Sirius asked._

_"Well, not at first," James admitted._

_"We were bloody pissed at first," Remus agreed._

_"But around day 5 or so...I mean, you look like hell, man," Peter said._

_"Come on. Let's get some food in you before you end up in the hospital wing," Remus said, standing and pulling Sirius with him._

_"At least Snape didn't rat you out, get you in trouble," Peter said._

_"I still have detention for the rest of the year."_

_"He told?" James said._

_"I did," Sirius said. "I told McGonagall."_

_"You told McGonagall?" Remus asked incredulously and then smiled at Sirius. "You're definitely forgiven."_

_"Um...." James looked awkward. "I...well... I was really pissed at first and I...I may have told mum and dad."_

_Sirius looked sad but nodded. "I figured you would. It's okay. I'll just stay here at Christmas and then go back to London this summer...."_

_"What? No, you bloody git. Did you not hear a word Remus just said about hating the act not the person?" James grabbed a letter from his desk and handed it to Sirius. "Had you been anywhere an owl could have found you, you would have gotten this."_

_Sirius opened the letter with shaking hands surprised it wasn't a howler._

**Dear Sirius,**

**James told us what happened with that boy and your father and I are quite disappointed in your decision making processes in this matter. That boy could have been killed and what of poor Remus? I'm sure he wouldn't have been allowed to stay at Hogwarts. All consequences that I'm sure you've thought of after the fact but we need to work on thinking of those consequences before the damage is already done. We'll talk much more about this over Christmas.**

**Love,**

**Mom**

_"Sorry, Sirius," James said. "I've had several of those "understanding the consequences of your actions" talks and they're not pretty and they generally end with something horrible like having to clean up the garage."_

_Sirius looked at James in stunned silence for a moment. "They still want me to come for Christmas?"_

_"Of course. It's Christmas. Where else would you be?" James asked. "Sometimes I think you might be absolutely daft. Now, let's go find some food before you starve to death."_

_*********_

_Fleamont popped his head out of his study. "Sirius, can you come in for a moment?"_

_Sirius nodded and walked in, sitting in the chair across from the desk._

_"No, come over here by the fire," Fleamont suggested, motioning to two chairs pulled close together in front of a roaring fire. "I thought we might have a chat."_

_Sirius sat down in the proffered chair waiting for the fallout that he'd been waiting on since they'd arrived a few hours ago, really waiting on for nearly two months now._

_"Can you tell me what happened?" Fleamont asked._

_"I...I got angry and I did something horrible," Sirius said softly._

_"And you're sorry?" Fleamont asked._

_"Yes but...."_

_"But what if it happens again?" Fleamont guessed. "What if you get angry again?"_

_"It's like ice," Sirius said barely audible. "Dark, black, ice. What if..." Sirius took a deep breath and voiced the fear that had plagued him for a very long time. "...what if I really am like them?"_

_"I want you to listen to me very carefully, son. You're not a bad person. You're a very good person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn't split into good people and bad people. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."_

_END OF FLASHBACK_

"So you were doing a bit of plagiarizing earlier?" Regulus asked.

"That's what you took away from my story?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"One of the things," Regulus said. "You're not like them. Not exactly anyway. I know what it feels like though. The ice and how it sort of freezes out everything else. How easy it is to give in to it."

"But we have to choose not to," Sirius said. "We have to fight against what's been bred into us."

"Choose to act on the light," Regulus said. "Perhaps by not plagiarizing." He smirked.

"It was really good advice!" Sirius exclaimed. "You're not the first person I've passed it on to. And I've tried very hard to follow it. For the most part. It got a lot more difficult after James and Lily were murdered."

"Peter," Regulus said quietly.

"He betrayed them to Voldemort, yes. Did you know? That he was a double agent?"

"I knew that we...they...we were trying to turn members of the Order. Remus being a werewolf, he was a target. Peter also because many saw him as a weak link. Someone who could be intimidated into switching sides. I didn't know that they'd been successful though I'm not sure they would have shared that with me...because of you. "

"Would you have told me had you known?"

"I don't know," Regulus admitted. "I really don't. I would like to say yes because I'd rather you not think I'm a monster but I just don't know."

"It's okay. I'd rather honesty than pretty lies anyway. And I don't think you're a monster. Just someone who made some bad choices," Sirius said.

Regulus considered this for a long moment. Maybe it wasn't too late for them. Maybe they could be brothers again. Somehow. After everything that had happened. "How did you end up in Azkaban?" he asked.

"Peter framed me. Said I was working with Voldemort and then faked his own death, killed a bunch of muggles in the process, and framed me for the whole thing."

"Really?" Regulus said incredulously. "I didn't see that in him. The betrayal yes but the rest, the cunning.... Wasn't there a trial though?"

"They had a bunch of muggle eye witnesses and that was good enough for them."

"But you were on THEIR SIDE!"

"I was a Black who had reverted to form," Sirius said bitterly. "Even Remus thought I betrayed them."

"Well that's not horribly surprising after what you just told me about Severus," Regulus said. "You know very well that people make assumptions about us based on our surname. What you did to Severus negated the rest in Remus' eyes. Made your betrayal seem feasible."

Sirius nodded. "I'd be more angry about it but I was pretty convinced he was the spy at the time. I guess I had some residual werewolf bias and Remus was holding on to some bad blood as well."

"It's ironic, really. The only member of the Order -- other than Dumbledore -- the Dark Lord didn't think could be turned was you. Walburga and Orion had given it their best efforts and failed which was sufficient proof for the Dark Lord. James also he thought was uncontrollable though I'm sure Harry's birth changed that. Family is a weakness."

" Family can also be a strength, Reg. They give you a reason to fight. I don't think he was wrong really about who could be turned though. James was the only one I really trusted. We didn't even really trust Dumbledore by then. Peter...it wasn't trust as much as it was that he was weak, too insignificant to even attract attention. A feint."

"I never quite understood how he fit with the rest of you," Regulus admitted.

"Remus felt bad for him and included him. James and I had failed to notice that he was living in our dorm room which I suppose makes us arseholes."

"Does it? Considering...."

"I'm sure some would say that had we truly befriended him, maybe he would have been loyal."

"He wouldn't have," Regulus said with certainty. "Take it from someone who spent years evaluating the weaknesses of the enemy. There's nothing you could have done. He likes power, is infatuated with it. Someone like that is easy prey."

"Perhaps but I should have seen him for who he was but really, I barely saw him at all. I'm not even sure I ever had a one on one conversation with him. Certainly not one that lasted beyond'Have you seen James?'"

"Sirius, honestly, the game was already over before you made the decision to make Peter the secret keeper. If it had been you, you'd have been killed to break the fidelius charm. Had it been Remus, either Fenrir would have forced it out of him...."

"Remus never would have told," Sirius insisted. " I see that now."

"Remus Lupin is a werewolf and werewolves are pack animals and Remus isn't the alpha. He would have told or he would have died and the fidelius charm would have been broken. Your queen was trapped. You just didn't know it yet." Regulus stared at his left arm with regret. "We were children making adult decisions. Life or death decisions. What you said about just focusing on making the right choices moving forward...it's really good advice. I think maybe we should both take it."

"Will you play again? I could stand some joy," Sirius said softly.

"Yeah." Regulus smiled. "Something more to your taste?" He began playing a piano version of "Stairway to Heaven", his fingers gliding over the keys, the world dropping away as he played and Sirius smiled, laid back on the love seat and listened.

*****************************************************

Regulus sat in the window seat with a book watching the snow falling over the already white garden. He could see his brother and James or, more accurately, their animagi versions, running around in the snow.

Euphemia sat down beside Regulus following his gaze to the garden. "How they managed that, I'll never know."

"Anything for a brother," Regulus said his tone slightly bitter despite his best efforts. Old wounds.

"He wants to make things right with you, you know. More than anything."

"I'm not sure I know how to let him...and I'm not sure he's the only one to blame for it."

"You'll figure it out and find your way back."

"Will we? It's not like we were just on opposing quidditch teams. I did...unforgivable things."

"We have a rule in this house, Reg. Hate the action not the person. Sirius understands that which is why he's trying to make things right with you. You need to understand it too though."

Euphemia got up and left Regulus to his thoughts.


	27. The Ghosts of Christmases Past

Sirius and Euphemia sat at the kitchen table having tea and going over their battle plans for Christmas. Their combined efforts had clearly surpassed any sense of dignity. 

James came in and helped himself to a biscuit. "When did your brother become a piano virtuoso?"

"I think he was 4," Sirius said scribbling a floor plan for the drawing room on a napkin. 

"3 and 1/2 actually," Regulus corrected joining them at the table. 

"It was before he could do magic. We thought he was a squib."

"I did magic at 5!! That is not a squib!" Regulus protested clearly having heard this squib concern on numerous occasions.

Lily and Aurora floated boxes of decorations into the kitchen.

"How old were you, Sirius?" Aurora asked sitting down next to him.

Regulus rolled his eyes. "His Highness doesn't remember because he was too young."

"Walburga said I was 2 1/2. Reg was hoarding a toy of mine so I broke all his toys. Apparently, there was a party when it happened. To celebrate my prodigy. " 

"Somehow this seems a microcosm that proves the macrocosm of my life," Regulus said.

"Whatever. They replaced them and you don't even remember it happening," Sirius said missing the point.

"You play beautifully, Reg," Lily said changing the subject. 

"Thank you. I hope you don't mind..."Regulus said to Euphemia. "...I couldn't resist."

"Of course not. This is your home, dear. Besides, Lily's right. It's wonderful to hear. I used to try to play it but I'm afraid I just offended it."

"I can teach you if you want," Regulus offered a little shyly.

"I would love that!" Euphemia exclaimed. 

Regulus smiled at her. 

Fleamont walked in carrying a muggle chainsaw that was running causing everyone great alarm. "Okay, Mia, what are our marching orders?" 

"First, turn that thing OFF until you get outside. Good Merlin, that should have been obvious," Euphemia cried in horror.

Fleamont complied winking at James and Sirius who laughed knowing he'd done it solely to get that reaction.

"Lily and Aurora, you're in charge of decorations. Fleamont, take James and Sirius and cut down the trees. I want at least four really big ones. Not the scrawny ones like last year."

They went their separate ways to perform their Christmas chores.

Regulus looked a little sad to be left out. "What can I do?" 

"Well, first, I was hoping you could help me out with some of the candy making and then maybe a piano lesson?"

Regulus smiled. "I can do that."

***************************************************************  
Euphemia took the inner shells out of the refrigerator and set them in front of Regulus. A large bowl of molten chocolate floated to the table behind her.

"By hand?" Regulus asked incredulously.

"Are your hands broken?" Euphemia winked at him, smiling.

"No but...."

"Not the way you did it growing up?"

"I guess the house elves did the baking," Regulus admitted. "I don't actually know how it happened." He started dipping the insides of the candy into the chocolate and then fishing the gooey mess out with a spoon. His hands were quickly covered in chocolate.

"Just lick it off," Euphemia said demonstrating on her own chocolate covered fingers.

Regulus looked at her a bit shocked and Euphemia looked at him a bit sad thinking that this poor child didn't have much of a childhood. 

"Just try it once," Euphemia encouraged.

Regulus stuck his thumb in his mouth. "That's quite tasty." 

Euphemia smiled at him and they continued dipping the candy, licking as much chocolate off their fingers as they managed to land on the candy surfaces. By the time Fleamont, Sirius, and James had arrived with the trees, they and the kitchen were quite a mess. 

"Is that chocolate on your nose, Regulus Black?" Sirius asked incredulously. "What have you done to my fastidious baby brother?"

Regulus tried to get the chocolate off his nose but when one's hands are covered in chocolate, there's little hope. 

"Don't tease. We're having an excellent time and that's all that matters," Euphemia scolded Sirius in her loving way. 

Sirius kissed them both on the head and continued dragging his tree through the house. 

"Wingardium leviosa! You're tracking needles everywhere!" Euphemia called after them. "I swear all three of them were raised by wolves." 

Regulus laughed. "Well, best mates with one anyway." 

"Oh yes, poor Remus. Sirius said that there's wolfsbane potion now that at least let's him keep his humanity. Doesn't prevent the transformation, of course. Can you imagine? All your bones breaking once a month? Just that one night with Sirius was more broken bone carnage than I ever care to see again."

Regulus realized what night she was talking about and cringed. Of course, this kind woman with her medical training had been the one to heal the damage done by his mother. He remembered that several of the bones had broken the skin and paled . "Thank you," he said quietly not looking at her.

"For what, dear?"

"For fixing him. It was...I begged her to stop but she wouldn't.... Father finally got her to stop, took her wand." Regulus looked up at Euphemia. "Not that he cared about Sirius but it would have been hard to explain if anyone asked. Cissy and I tried to get him out of the house before Mother came back. Cissy knew how to call the Knight Bus but we couldn't wait with him. If they'd have noticed we were gone, they'd come looking...."

Sirius sat down beside Regulus having overheard the last part of the conversation. "You got the Knight Bus?"

Regulus nodded. "She would have killed you."

"You saved my life." Sirius hugged Regulus. "Thank you."

********************

As the decorating continued, Euphemia realized that she'd forgotten the tree in the front yard. She looked around for a volunteer but found that most of her "elves" were busy. "Regulus, could you take care of that please? The lights are in the garage."

"Sure," Regulus said.

"I'll help you," James said quickly. "That tree is a two man job."

Regulus and James headed to the garage.

"It's okay," Regulus said. "I can manage it if you want to go back inside."

"I want to help," James insisted. "Besides, if the garage swallows one of us, the other can go for help."

"How bad can it be?" Regulus asked opening the garage door. "Merlin's beard. You weren't exaggerating."

"My parents do not believe in getting rid of anything. EVER," James explained and led the way to where he believed the lights were stored.

"Neither do mine but...." Regulus was at a loss for words. Beyond Fleamont's myriad muggle machinery bits, there were aisles and aisles and stacks and stacks of various magical accoutrement dating back centuries. It's possible that whoever published the list of 28 families would reconsider leaving the Potters off if they saw this, Regulus thought.

James pointed to a box buried several stacks deep and they started moving various artifacts trying to free it. 

"So how are things, Reg?" James asked. "Settling in?"

Regulus bit back a sarcastic reply reminding himself that it was his choice to live here, to try to find a way back to Sirius which meant dealing with James. "Fine, I guess. Definitely more pleasant here, fewer boggarts and doxie outbreaks..." He saw movement out of the corner of his eye. "Well, in the main house anyway."

"No telling what might be out here," James agreed and then got to why he really offered to help. "I'm glad you decided to live with us."

Regulus looked surprised. "You are?"

"I know you don't like me very much. Maybe if I were you, I wouldn't like me very much either. I've never had a brother...not a blood brother that is...so I don't really know what it's like...what happened with you and Sirius... but I could see where you might blame me for it. It wasn't my intention to come between you. He's just been my best mate since the moment we met. I'd never really had a friend before I met him and...well, I don't know if you've ever met someone you just clicked with...but it's a pretty powerful thing. Anyway, I get it if you don't like me, if you think I came between you."

"It wasn't just you," Regulus admitted. "There were a lot of factors." James was honest with him. Perhaps he owed James honesty? "I used to think of you as the replacement brother and it hurt. A lot more than I would like to admit."

"I'm sorry," James said sincerely. "I don't really know how to fix this, Regulus, but I want to. I love him and I think it would be good for him to have you in his life. Good for you as well. I'm afraid I can't excuse myself though. I was without him for 14 years and I won't go through that again."

Regulus considered this as he continued to move artifacts. "Why did you make Peter the secret keeper?"  
James thought this a bit of a non sequitur but figured it was better than anger and sarcasm so he answered. "The alternative was to get Sirius killed which wasn't an option," he said quietly. "With Peter, there was at least a chance that we would all survive."

Regulus wondered if James realized that he could have gotten Peter killed had Peter really been a loyal friend. He wasn't sure it was relevant though and really, he agreed with James' choice. If he had to choose between protecting Peter and protecting Sirius, there was only one choice to make.

"What you did with the horcrux...that was truly heroic," James said. "It's one thing to go into battle knowing that you could die. It's another to go into battle knowing that you will die but choosing to do it anyway because it's the right thing to do. I'm not sure I would have made that choice," he admitted. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would like us to find a way to get past the old anger and maybe even be friends. We both love Sirius...don't bother to deny it...you wouldn't put yourself in this situation if you didn't...and maybe the best thing for all of us would be to try to behave like friends instead of enemies."

"I think if you truly understood what this mark on my arm meant, you wouldn't be so quick to abandon me as an enemy," Regulus said, turning to face James. Always the crux of the matter. Is the chasm too wide to be bridged?

James looked Regulus in the eyes. "I assume it means that you're pretty proficient at all three unforgivable curses or were a couple of decades ago anyway. I'm not naive, Regulus. I also think the choices you've made since then have been good ones. Stealing the horcrux, moving in here, trying with Sirius. Maybe not spending 18 years at Grimmauld Place though I guess that was more self-destructive than anything else."

"Our choices determine who we really are," Regulus said.

"They do and you made some really bad ones during your teenage years but since then I think you've made some pretty good ones and I'm willing to bet that your good choices continue. So friends not enemies," James said. "Eventually. I get that I may be an acquired taste. It took Lily 6 years to acquire it."

Regulus laughed a bit. "Maybe had you not taken joy in torturing her little friend, Severus. Not that I blame you. He was just...wrong."

James laughed. " See, we've found common ground already. So, we can try this?"

"Yeah, we can try," Regulus said. "Really, we've been talking for awhile and I haven't thought about hexing you once."

"I'll take that!" James said laughing. "Shall we deal with this tree?"

"Merlin forbid Sirius can't vomit Christmas everywhere," Regulus snarked grabbing the finally unearthed box of lights.

*************************************

Everyone sat in the parlor decorated for Christmas, trees, lights, crackling fire. It was Christmas Eve and the decor was perfect but the mood was dampened.

Lily had brought out the pensieve and had been reliving Harry's Christmas at Grimmauld Place over and over again. 

James looked increasingly concerned for her. "Lily, let's put that away for a bit."

Lily didn't hear him. She was engaged in watching Harry and the Weasleys open their Christmas gifts. 

"Lily," James said louder, touching her arm.

Lily pulled her face out of the pensieve, wiping away tears.

"Let's put it away now, dear," Euphemia said gently. 

"He's so happy though," Lily said. "Where do you think he's spending this Christmas?"

No one wanted to answer that question any more than they wanted to meet her eyes.

"Do you think he might be at the Weasleys?" Lily asked Sirius.

Sirius didn't think so but said," maybe."

"What does their house look like?" Lily asked hoping to imagine Harry safe and happy there.

"I don't know. I've never been inside their house," Sirius said softly. He was torn between wanting to spare Lily further pain and wanting to make sure she understood the gravity of what had occurred at Bill and Fleur's wedding. He wasn't even sure there were any Weasleys spending Christmas at the Burrow let alone Harry. 

James shook his head slightly at Sirius.

"I'm sure he's fine, Lily. Probably at the Burrow," Sirius said.

"Could we go and check?" Lily asked.

Sirius gave James a "now what?" look.

"You know we can't, Lily," James said. 

Aurora sat down beside Lily and put her arm around her, rested her head against Lily's. 

Lily felt better, knew that Aurora was making her feel better. "At least you know where Luna is," she said to Aurora more tersely than she had planned.

"I hope I do," Aurora agreed. She glanced at Regulus remembering what he'd said about rounding up half bloods. "I'm choosing to believe that she's safe at home with her father and you need to choose to believe that Harry is safe somewhere as well."

"I have an idea," Euphemia said. "Let's all tell our favorite Christmas memory from our childhoods."

There were some groans and grimaces around the room but no verbal objections.

"I'll start," Euphemia said. "When I was 7, my sister and I got this dollhouse and we spent all day making the little figures move around the rooms. Her more than me. She was 11 and had some control over her magic. I mostly just set them on fire but it was still fun."

"Well, we didn't really celebrate Christmas in Iona but my favorite Christmas at Hogwarts was my third year when Hagrid let me go with him to get the Christmas trees," Aurora said.

"You stayed at Hogwarts during Christmas?" Regulus asked.

"During summer breaks too," Aurora said. "Nowhere else to go."

"I can't count the number of times my sister begged me to stay at Hogwarts during breaks," Lily said.

Euphemia felt this happy memory exchange getting away from her. "James, what about you?" she asked choosing someone she knew could produce a happy Christmas memory. 

"The first Christmas Sirius spent with us," James said without thinking. 

Regulus thought that he would have counted that as the worst Christmas ever not the best but he took a breath and let it go in the interest of keeping the peace with James and new beginnings with Sirius. 

"That was a good one," Sirius agreed. Probably the one he would have chosen but Regulus.... "My best childhood Christmas memory was when Reg was 5 and still believed in Father Christmas which infuriated Walburga and Orion who had spent weeks telling him Father Christmas was a muggle hoax."

Euphemia grimaced.

Regulus looked a bit surprised. 

"Somehow he'd decided that they were lying and I was telling the truth but it was a close call so Andromeda and I decided we needed to provide some proof. Something which would have been simple a couple years later but at ages 6 and 10, our magic was not exactly under control so our attempt to conjure a Father Christmas costume...well, it didn't exactly look like what you see on the street corner with the bells. More like red footy pajamas really and then there was the issue of neither of us being big enough to pull it off. So we finally decided that if I was on her shoulders and we both wore the costume stuffed with pillows, we'd be big enough but then the beard was an issue so Andromeda tried to give me facial hair only it covered my ENTIRE face and she couldn't fix it...it was quite a sight."

"Did it work?" Aurora asked.

"Well, WE thought it did," Sirius responded. "We snuck into Reg's room and 'accidentally' woke him up while we were leaving presents so he'd see us. Reg, did it work?"

Regulus blinked back tears. He hadn't thought about this in years. At the time, he'd believed it was Father Christmas and in later years had convinced himself it was a dream. Never once had he considered this possibility. That his brother had gone to so much trouble just to let him believe a pretty lie for a little bit longer. "Yeah, it worked," he said softly. "I never knew...." He wanted to hug Sirius, to let him know how much that meant to him. So do it, he thought to himself. He got up from his chair, walked over to the couch where Sirius and Aurora were sitting and awkwardly hugged his brother. "Thank you," he whispered into Sirius' ear.

Sirius hugged Regulus tightly thinking that this Christmas memory was quickly going to the top of the list. The hug ended and Regulus began to get up to return to his chair. Sirius caught his arm. "Sit here with us." Regulus nodded and stayed beside his brother. Sirius put his arm around Regulus who tensed for a moment and then relaxed. 

"Lily, what about you?" Euphemia asked.

Lily thought for awhile. "I guess I was maybe 6. Petunia and I spent the whole day playing together. It was the last Christmas before I started exhibiting 'odd' behavior. The last Christmas I really had a sister."

An awkward silence followed as everyone considered their own difficult family relationships. Except the three Potters who considered how blessed they were to have each other.

Regulus got up and walked into the conservatory and sat down at the piano. He started playing a muggle Christmas song he'd always liked called "I'll Be Home for Christmas". He heard the others coming and joining him around the piano. Lily began singing along and the others slowly joined in. That song was followed by another. No one realized how much time had passed until they looked out the window and saw the sun coming up over the horizon.


	28. The Three (Ani)Magi

Sirius, Aurora, James, Lily, and Regulus were lazing around the fire in the drawing room as the snow grew heavier outside, the full moon nearly covered in clouds. Regulus watched them all. Lily curled up with a book. Aurora seemingly staring into space though Regulus guessed that her head was far from empty. Sirius and James played chess. Regulus laughed to himself realizing that James was fully focused while Sirius was only half paying attention and still had James trapped in four different ways. Maybe he should take the next game. He doubted he could win but he could at least make Sirius engage all his brain cells in the effort and James looked like he could use a break though he was far too proud to admit defeat on his own. Regulus sighed to himself feeling a sense of peace in this room. At least in this moment. Maybe Mia was right. He should try to meet Sirius halfway though he wasn't even sure what they had in common anymore. He thought of Padfoot and Prongs as they called their animagus forms. He could never been in sync with Sirius like James was but.... "How did you become animagi?" he asked the chess players suddenly.

"It's a bit complicated. A lot of steps and we kept messing up the first one," Sirius said.

"The fourth step was no picnic either," James said. He realized finally that Sirius had won 30 minutes ago and turned over his queen.

"And it hurts quite a bit the first time," Sirius said. "You really have to fight the urge to have a good freak out while it's happening because if you do, you're likely to get stuck between forever."

"That nearly happened to Peter," James said.

"In retrospect, we should have let it happen," Sirius said.

"Can you show me?" Regulus asked.

Sirius looked surprised for a moment. "You want to be an animagus?"

I want to have something in common with my brother, Regulus thought but said simply," yes."

"Do you think it would work here?" Aurora asked putting away her thoughts and joining the conversation.

"We can still transform here. It may," James said.

"Worth a try. The first step is horrible though," Sirius said.

Regulus looked a bit fearful. "What is the first step?"

"You have to keep a mandrake leaf in your mouth for an entire month," James said.

"Eating, talking, other things that you may use your mouth for...." Sirius began.

"...forget about it," James said. "We barely even ate because if you swallow the mandrake leaf, you have to start over again."

"We started over a LOT," Sirius said.

"This explains several blissfully quiet months during fourth and fifth year," Lily said.

"You missed our conversations...." James insisted.

"...our sparkling wit..." Sirius agreed.

"...our sexually charged banter...." James continued.

"I didn't," Lily insisted. "Not at all."

"She lies," James said.

"I'm not sure why you married such an obvious liar, Prongs," Sirius agreed.

"Moment of weakness, I suppose. You know, she'd clearly had a crush on me all those years. I guess I felt like I owed her something," James explained.

"Perhaps the two of you could join Regulus in step one," Lily suggested. "A show of solidarity."

Regulus laughed. "I think she'd like you both to shut it."

"Nah. She just thinks she does," Sirius said. "She missed us when we were quiet. No one to yell at."

"No one to tell to go to hell," James agreed.

"No one to tell to jump in a lake," Sirius continued.

"How did the two of you manage to stay silent for a month?" Regulus asked.

"Remus had a particularly bad transformation one month," James said quietly.

"Almost died of self-inflicted wounds," Sirius said equally quietly.

"Step one got a lot easier after that," James said.

"I'm done making fun now," Lily said sadly remembering.

Regulus felt a stab in his heart. He wasn't jealous of the love they had for Remus exactly or the love they had for each other. It was more a stab of emptiness as he thought of the people who passed for his friends. Lucius, Antonin, even Cissy. Would they do anything like that for him? He wasn't even sure they would be his friends if his surname wasn't Black. "Do you have a mandrake leaf?" he asked Aurora.

Aurora apparated and came back a moment later with the leaf.

"You're really going to do this?" Sirius asked.

Regulus was suddenly unsure. Maybe he was treading somewhere he shouldn't be.

"Of course, he is!" James answered for him. "We're in need of a third!"

"It is more fun with three. What do you think he'll be?" Sirius asked.

"You don't get to choose?" Regulus asked.

"No, it's like your patronus -- usually IS your patronus. It chooses you," James said.

"I've never produced a patronus," Regulus admitted glancing at his arm.

"Then it'll be a big surprise!" Sirius said.

"Wait...so isn't the patronus supposed to be like your spirit animal or something? And Peter was a..." Regulus began.

"Yeah, yeah, obvious now," James said. "Where were you with that wisdom when we were 15, huh?"

"Plotting against you," Regulus answered honestly. Maybe too honestly.

"Yes, well, turns out so was Peter. At least, you got it right in the end. Now mandrake in the mouth," Sirius ordered.

Regulus complied and almost spit it out.

"You get used to the taste," James assured him.

"Eventually," Sirius added.

*******

Days and weeks passed with James and Sirius trying to get Regulus to spit out the mandrake leaf just for the fun of making him do it again.

"He's far more disciplined than you are, Pads," James said on day 28.

"Who in their right bloody mind would spit it out with two days to go?" Regulus wrote. He'd taken to using the flagrate spell to communicate with them by writing in the air since they insisted on speaking to him almost constantly.

Sirius hung his head.

"Really?" Regulus wrote.

"Twice," James said.

"Why?" Regulus wrote.

"Two words. Marlene McKinnon. I'd been trying to shag her all school year and she finally decided that day 28 of step one was the day that she would give in to my overtures."

Regulus shook his head and wrote, "For a girl? You're a git."

"I'm not proud of it. Though it was worth the extra month," Sirius smirked.

***********************************************************

The night of the full moon came but snow came with it.

"Bad luck, mate," James said. "Have to start all over again."

"WHAT?" Regulus wrote.

"Has to be a cloudless full moon to start the next step," James explained.

Regulus looked completely crestfallen.

Sirius considered for a moment. "What if I can get rid of the clouds for a bit? The moon just needs to be in view for the process not the entire night."

"What are you thinking?" James asked.

"That high priestess could control the weather so, in theory...."

"You think you could?" James said.

Sirius looked skeptical. "AURORA! We NEED you!"

"Not that I don't love when you bellow my name," Aurora said entering the kitchen, "...but you have those tattoos on your wrist for a reason."

Sirius looked sheepish. "I forgot."

"What do you need?"

"Can you make the clouds go away?" Sirius asked.

"That is a bit...dark...for my skill set but you probably can. Tired of the snow?"

"Need to see the full moon so I don't have to have a bloody mandrake leaf in my mouth for another month!" Regulus scribbled.

Aurora considered for a moment. "Ventus Voca. Make sure you think about the wind pushing the clouds away though and you'll have to keep it up. As soon as you break focus, the clouds will return."

"I'll help Regulus with step two," James said. "Aurora, you have the chrysalis?"

"I do." Aurora apparated.

"We gathered the dew yesterday. Had to go to 4 countries to find it," Sirius said.

"This really isn't a good dead of winter spell," James said.

Aurora returned with the moon-struck crystal phial and the chrysalis. Lily joined as well curious.

"Reg, a hair please," James said.

Regulus dutifully pulled out a shiny black hair from his head and handed it to James who mixed the dew, the hair, and the chrysalis.

"Okay, your turn, Pads."

Sirius went outside into the storm. "Ventus Voca!" The winds blew the clouds east clearing the moon.

"He did it," said Lily excited despite herself.

"The leaf," James said. "I think you need to put it in the phial yourself."

Regulus took the leaf out of his mouth and mixed it in with the other ingredients. "What now?" he croaked hoarsely.

Lily called Sirius inside.

"Store it in a quiet dark place until the next electrical storm," James said.

"That could be months!" Regulus said.

"Or it could be tonight?" Sirius looked at Aurora.

"I'm beginning to feel like you're taking advantage."

"I was buried alive! Shouldn't I get some benefit?"

"Before we do anything crazy, you're skipping step three," James reminded Sirius.

"Oh yeah! I liked step three actually."

"What's step three?" Regulus asked.

"Every morning and every night, you repeat 'Amato Animo Animato Animagus' with your wand on your heart until you feel a second heartbeat," Sirius explained.

"I don't have a wand," Regulus said.

"I guess your wand hand then," James said.

"Once you feel a second heartbeat, I'll create an electrical storm, you'll drink the potion and that should do it," Sirius said.

"Assuming you don't panic during the transformation," James said.

"Yes. True. The most dangerous part really," Sirius said.

"How long does step three usually take?" Regulus asked.

"Depends really. Sirius got a second heartbeat in maybe 3 weeks? Took me 5 weeks but it didn't matter because there wasn't an electrical storm in between anyway."

"It took Peter 6 months but really, until he blew up that muggle street, I sort of thought he was part squib," Sirius said. "It should happen quickly for you."

***********************************************

Regulus lay in bed a couple weeks later with his wand hand over his heart saying "Amato Animo Animato Animagus". He wasn't sure exactly when it happened but it had started to feel...important...to do this. Like there was something locked inside him that wanted out. Some part of him that was animal that wanted a body. "Amato Animo Animato Animagus". He focused on that animal as he had been for the last few days since he'd first felt it and then he felt IT. It's heartbeat inside his chest. Amazing. "SIRIUS!!!" He bounded out of bed, running down the hallway toward his brother's room. "SIRIUS!!!"

Sirius and James both came stumbling out of their rooms blinking sleepily. "What is it? What's wrong?" Sirius asked.

"Feel my chest!"

"Seems a little early in the morning for such things," James grumbled.

Regulus grabbed Sirius' hand and forced it over his heart. "Feel my chest!"

"You have two heartbeats!" Sirius smiled proudly.

"That was quick," James said.

"I've been able to sort of feel the animal for a few days so I've been focusing on that when I said the incantation."

"That makes a lot of sense actually," Sirius said. "Perhaps step three needs to be revised."

"So what now?" Regulus asked a bit impatient now that it was becoming real to him.

"Pads, do you feel up to creating a lightning storm?" James asked.

"Indeed, I feel like that could be arranged...though...."

"What?" Regulus asked.

"Well, we don't know what you're about to become. Where should we do the transformation?" Sirius asked. "We used the shrieking shack, of course."

"Let's use it again then," James said.

"Seems like as good a place as any," Regulus agreed nerves and excitement causing knots in his stomach. He grabbed the phial and they apparated to the shrieking shack.

"This place is a disaster," Regulus said, looking around. "Lumos." He immediately wished he hadn't. The claw marks, the blood on the walls. He thought of Remus Lupin, the Marauder he found least offensive during school and cringed for the pain that boy must have felt here. The terror. He understood something about his brother and James that he hadn't before. Perhaps understood something about love that he hadn't before.

"Are you ready?" Sirius asked him.

Regulus turned to his brother seeing for the first time that his defiance wasn't just rebellion but something more. Something deeper. "Yeah, I'm ready."

"It'll be fine. Just accept what's happening. Don't try to fight it," Sirius said to Regulus. To James, "take care of him."

James nodded. "I've got this."

Sirius disappeared outside and yelled "Voca Fulgeris!" and the thunder rolled and the lightning lit up the early spring sky.

"That's our cue," James said. "Ready?"

Regulus nodded, took a deep breath, placed his wand hand on his heart, said "Amato Animo Animato Animagus" and swallowed the potion. At first nothing and then he was on his knees doubled over in pain. The second heartbeat seemed to be killing his original heartbeat. Don't panic. Let it happen. And then he saw it...the lion, full maned, it's beautiful black eyes staring back at him. He felt at one with it, at peace with it. He felt the pain of the transformation but it was just pain and he was a lion.

"Bloody hell ," James murmured.

Regulus, the lion, was surprised by how much James smelled like food but Regulus, the man, recognized James as "not food".

James stared at the lion considering the situation. Remus had always been highest up on the food chain but this...he was food regardless of whether he was James or Prongs. "Reg?"

Regulus roared at James because he could.

James backed away quickly almost falling over. "Good kitty. Friend not food, right Reg?"

Regulus considered roaring again because James really could be obnoxious but instead walked carefully toward him on his four feet. He felt his tail swaying behind him.

James cautiously held out his hand to Regulus who rubbed his head against it. Friend not food, he thought.

James considered a moment and transformed. Still friend?

Regulus was surprised that he could still sort of understand James. Prongs. He took a step toward the stag and rubbed his head against him. Still friend.

Go get Pads, Prongs thought.

Regulus nodded and the lion lowered his head in agreement.

The lion and the stag walked outside together.

Sirius saw them and let the storm end. "Bloody hell. A bloody lion???? You know that the Gryffindor mascot IS a lion, right, Reg?"

Regulus roared at him unamused.

Sirius laughed and transformed into Padfoot. Kinda cool, huh? he thought to Reg and then ran off. The other two chased after him following him into the Forbidden Forest.

************************************************************************

Nightly outdoor excursions had become a regular occurrence for the three animagi. There was something absolutely freeing about running about as a wild animal. Wild animals didn't worry about things like the past or the future or reconciling with their brothers. They just lived in the moment and Regulus was absolutely fine with that.

Prongs was the first to notice that it was getting late...or early depending on your perspective...and changed back to human form.

Padfoot barked in annoyance but changed back as well.

Regulus followed suit but was sad to see the night end.

"That is quite a tight leash your wife has you on," Regulus said to James.

"That's not a leash," Sirius smirked.

Regulus laughed. "Yeah, I guess that explains it."

"Pads, if you were even half as funny as you think you are...." James began.

"I'm only pointing out the truth, Prongs," Sirius said. "You're afraid Little Prongs will be sleeping on the couch if you're not home by midnight."

"Does Aurora really not care?" James asked.

"I decline to answer that question as it may force me to abandon the moral high ground," Sirius said.

"So you give me a hard time about Lily all the while using it as an excuse to stay out of trouble with your own wife?" James asked.

"You can't prove it," Sirius said.

"You're both bloody lame," Regulus said. "I think 15 year old Padfoot and Prongs would be ashamed."

"15 year old Padfoot and Prongs would be happy that their grown up selves are getting shagged regularly," James said.

"15 year old Padfoot WAS getting shagged regularly," Sirius corrected.

"Really? At 15?" Regulus asked incredulously. "Isn't that kind of young?"

"The only worthwhile thing Orion and Walburga ever gave me was a face that gets an easy "yes". I'm supposed to squander that gift? How old were you?"

"17," Regulus said and then realized he didn't care to discuss his sex life or lack thereof. "So when do I get a nickname?"

"An excellent question and one that we should have thought of months ago!" James said. "It has to be something related to your animagus form. Mane?"

"Pussy cat?" Sirius suggested with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Regulus glared at him.

"Mr. Meow-Meow?" Sirius asked.

"Sod off."

"What about Claws?" James suggested. "Certainly your claws were the first thing I noticed when you transformed into a fucking lion in the shrieking shack. Just when you think a werewolf is scary. "

"I like Claws," Regulus said.

"I don't think we've officially ruled out Mr. Meow-Meow," Sirius said.

"Claws it is," James said ignoring Sirius.


	29. Florean Fortescue's

As winter turned slowly to spring, April 6th rolled around much to Regulus' chagrin as he lay in bed on the dreaded day. He'd managed to de-Gryffindorize the guest room though he hadn't known what to put up instead and so he stared at the white walls gloomily. He'd never been particularly fond of his birthday. Early on, before Sirius fell out of favor, it had been glossed over if it was remembered at all and then later, too much effort had been made even though Regulus knew that the effort was to hurt Sirius rather than to make his birthday special. Even once he became the good son who made them proud, he was still, in reality, an afterthought. And now, he lived at the Potters who probably didn't even know it was his birthday not that he expected them to though they'd been very kind to him. He'd grown especially fond of Euphemia but they were Sirius' family not his. He glanced at the mark on his arm knowing that it would forever be a wall between them. How could it not? Their sons and daughter-in-law fought and died in a war symbolized by the horrific tattoo on his arm. It was this depressing line of thought that finally encouraged him to roll over and bury his head under the pillow, trying to go back to sleep. 

The door flew open then and James and Sirius ran in and jumped on his bed absolutely upsetting everything in its vicinity. "Happy Birthday, Reg!" Sirius yelled, bouncing on the bed. 

"Good bloody hell! What's wrong with you?!?" Regulus yelled from his place under the pillow. "Grown man jumping on the bed! STOP!"

Meanwhile James was singing "Happy Birthday to You" at the top of his lungs. 

"You're grumpier than usual. Even for your birthday," Sirius said. "I told them that you hated your birthday but a vote was taken and nobody cared so you may want to start coming to terms with that." 

Regulus pulled his head out from under the covers only to learn that balloons shaped like lions and a banner were also involved in this early morning travesty. "What are you on about? Why did you even tell them?"

"Because they asked," Sirius said. "You know, I get it. I used to hate my birthday too but they're actually quite fun when you're not being used as a pawn."

Regulus looked skeptical of this whole birthday for the sake of celebrating concept. He was still considering his escape options when Euphemia, Fleamont, Aurora, and Lily came in singing and holding a platter of pancakes with burning candles stuck in them.

"There will be a real cake later, of course," Euphemia assured Regulus carefully setting the burning pancakes on the nightstand. 

Regulus looked at all of them like they'd just turned into hippogriffs. 

"You really weren't kidding about the birthday thing," Lily said.

"Reg, are you okay with this?" Aurora asked, sitting next to him on the bed. "If it's really upsetting, we can...."

Regulus realized suddenly that it sort of wasn't upsetting. Not exactly upsetting. He wasn't sure what it was but.... "No, it's okay. I am kind of hungry." He glanced at James who was still in his bed, thought about mentioning boundaries but figured it would fall on deaf ears. 

Euphemia gave him a plate of pancakes and he took a bite. "Chocolate chip! I love chocolate chip...how did you know?"

"She pays attention to that sort of thing," James said offhandedly, helping himself to pancakes. 

Regulus felt inexplicable tears in his eyes and tried to focus on the pancakes. He felt Sirius touch his shoulder and he looked up at him suddenly realizing how Sirius must have felt when he came to live here. Utterly foreign but in a sort of absolutely wonderful way. 

"So what do you want to do for your birthday, son?" Fleamont asked helping himself to pancakes. 

"The birthday boy or girl gets to choose and everyone has to do it whether they really want to go to a muggle car lot and listen to really boring questions about engines or not," James explained. 

Regulus laughed wondering whether it was Fleamont or Sirius who had forced such torture upon him. They could spend hours tinkering in the garage with muggle cars. "Not that," Regulus assured him. He thought for a moment. "Do you remember that ice cream shop on Diagon Alley?"

"Florean Fortescue's," Aurora said. "I loved that place."  
"Could we go there? Remember, Sirius, we used to go when we were little."

"I remember," Sirius said trying to keep his face light, trying not to remember the last time he'd been to Diagon Alley. 

James looked at Sirius with concern. 

"What's wrong?" Regulus realized. "Diagon Alley too? Sirius, the two of you are running out of countries where you're still welcome."

"It's not that quite," Lily said.

"It's just that..." Aurora began.

"Not everyone thinks that I'm innocent. In fact, pretty much everyone outside this room thinks I'm a homicidal sociopath who sold my best mates out to Voldemort," Sirius explained.

"So going to a place with a bunch of wizards is not optimal. I get it though the irony of that whole situation is absolutely laughable. Anyway, we can do something else. Quidditch perhaps?" Regulus suggested.

"No," Sirius said. "We're going for ice cream. They can all bloody sod off if they don't like it."

"We really don't have to," Regulus said.

"I do remember going there for ice cream when we were little and it was a good memory. One of the few I have from our childhood. I want to go."

"Ice cream it is then!" James said bouncing off the bed. "I like the Quidditch idea as well. Maybe after? Dad will play so we can play 2 on 2."

Later on, the group had settled into a table at Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlor and were all happily licking away. 

"I think this may be even better than I remember it," Regulus said. He felt...happy...sitting here with his ice cream and his...family? Maybe. 

At a nearby table, two wizards sat talking and glancing over at the birthday party. "Can you believe he has the audacity to show his face?"

"I can't imagine what the Potters are thinking."

"I don't even understand how he ended up here after he sold them out to you know who."

Sirius glared into his ice cream.

"Just ignore them," James said. 

"No, I don't believe I will," Regulus said. He rolled up his shirt sleeves baring the dark mark and stood. 

"Oh shit," James said, preparing to backup Regulus when the time came.

"Reg, just sit down and eat your ice cream," Sirius said. "They're not worth it."

Regulus ignored his brother and walked over to the wizards' table like someone who didn't just own the shop but everyone in it as well. "I heard you talking about my brother," he said in a tone that was the perfect combination of haughtiness and ice. 

"Your brother?" one of the wizard's asked.

"I'm Regulus Black," he said darkly making sure that they could see the mark on his left arm.

"We didn't mean nothing..." the second wizard began unable to look away from the dark mark, too terrified to meet Regulus' eyes anyway.

"I see," Regulus said. "That's fortunate because I had come over here to correct you as to how the Dark Lord chooses who we can and cannot bend to our will. We all knew that Sirius Black would die before he would ever prove useful so we targeted Peter Pettigrew instead. He gave us the Potters' location. He was quite happy to be of service to the Dark Lord." 

The two wizards paled in terror, afraid to look up from their ice cream bowls. 

"Now, you're going to tell your pathetic friends the truth of this because if I ever hear anyone say that my brother worked for the Dark Lord again, I'm going to hold the two of you personally responsible," Regulus explained his voice so low, so deadly, as to be barely audible and yet he had no doubt that these two gits had caught every word. "Do we understand each other?"

They nodded. "Yes sir, Mr. Black," one of them stuttered. His mate was too terrified to speak. 

"I believe your ice cream has melted. Perhaps you should be on your way," Regulus suggested.

The two wizards ran out of the ice cream parlor. Regulus looked around at the rest of the customers but they were all very involved in their ice creams. He returned to the table and picked up his ice cream.

"So that seems solved," James said.

"Well done," Aurora agreed. 

"Thank you," Sirius said. "I could have just ignored them but...."

"You shouldn't have to listen to it. It's ridiculous enough that it happened and now people are going to think you're guilty for eternity? It's not okay," Regulus said.

"Exactly what I've been saying," Fleamont said.

"I don't think you'll need to worry about that any more. Those two were petrified," James said.

Regulus sat quietly staring at his ice cream. "I'm not proud of it, you know. That I could scare them."

"We know, dear," Euphemia said and put her hand on Regulus' hand. 

Regulus looked up at her caring face and knew that they did know.

"Okay so ice cream done. Can we go get his birthday present now?" James begged.

"It's a birthday present for James as much as you," Sirius explained. "Thus the excitement."

"You said it was a good idea!" James cried.

"It IS a good idea but you can't pretend it's completely altruistic," Sirius said.

"I am almost afraid to ask," Regulus said with a small smile at James. James was growing on him. Slowly. 

"Firebolt 5000!" James yelled as if no more explanation was needed.

"It's a really impressive broom," Sirius said.

Regulus smiled. "Let's go check it out then!"

Auora looked at Lily and rolled her eyes. 

"Aurora and I will be in Flourish and Blotts when you're done," Lily announced. 

******  
The Firebolt 5000s led to a long afternoon of Quidditch that left them exhausted and laughing as they replayed the highlights for Aurora and Lily despite the fact that they had watched the entire thing. 

Euphemia brought a cake into the garden and set it on the table while they all sang "Happy Birthday" and Regulus thought that maybe birthdays weren't such a bad idea after all.


	30. Casualties of War

Sirius and Aurora walked hand in hand into the garden. The garden twinkled with fairy lights for the festive occasion.

" Can you believe a year ago on Beltane, I married you and then we barely escaped with our lives?" Sirius smiled at his wife. " We could have gone somewhere just the two of us. It is our anniversary."

" And deny Mia a second time? No chance," Aurora said. "Maybe we can have a private celebration later?"

"Definitely." Sirius kissed Aurora.

"Happy Anniversary!" Mia cried hugging them.

"Congratulations!" Lily said.

"And they said weddings with wolf attacks never last," James teased.

"Wolf attacks???" Regulus asked.

"Have you never heard the story?" Fleamont said. "It wasn't exactly your ordinary wedding."

They all recounted the tale for Regulus.

"I'm sorry I missed it," Regulus said.

"Me too," Sirius said.

Regulus realized that Sirius was being sincere and smiled.

"So it seems to me that Claws needs a wife now," James said. "Lily, do you know anyone else?"

Regulus looked uncomfortable. "That's not necessary," he said. "I'm not really ready to..." He didn't even know. The idea of going on a date with some girl seemed way beyond his current capabilities though.

********

Sirius tossed on the bed, mumbling, and then screamed.

Aurora sat up and shook Sirius slightly, trying to wake him. "Wake up, love. It was a dream. Just a dream." She put her arms around him and rubbed his back as his eyes opened.

Sirius clung to Aurora, gasping for breath. "I think Remus is dying."

"Are you sure it was a prophecy and not a dream?" she asked gently.

"It felt like I was there. Seeing it through his eyes. Like with Dumbledore."

"Let's go find James and Lily then."

******************

James and Lily were in bed beginning to dose off when their door flew opened and Sirius and Aurora entered.

"What the bloody hell???" James yelled.

"Do we have to put a sock on our own bedroom door to keep you out?" Lily asked.

Sirius ignored their protests. "It's Remus."

James and Lily were still pulling robes over their pajamas as they apparated to the in between.

******************

Remus blinked his eyes. Quite a hit I took. He struggled to his feet, wand hand ready to continue his duel with Dolohov but there was no wand and no Dolohov. No anyone. No castle. No Dora. "Nymphodora!" He yelled into the mist. Where did this mist come from? Some trick of Voldemort's? Why am I naked? He stumbled forward thinking he saw shapes in the distance. "Dora, is that you?"

***************  
Sirius saw Remus first and hurried toward him with James, Lily, and Aurora close behind. Remus seemed to be wandering about confused. Sirius noticed that Remus wasn't alone up here like he had been. That can't be good. "Remus!"

Remus turned toward his name but was still blinded by the mist. What was this stuff? He stumbled and felt strong arms catch him and then go around him, hugging him tightly.

"Moony!" Sirius hugged Remus and then laughed with joy as he felt James hugging them both.

"It's Moony!" James yelled giving Remus a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

Remus clung to them, his best friends. They were together and... young? He pulled away enough to look at Sirius, touch his perfect, yes young, face. He looked between James and Sirius and saw Lily beaming at him. He let go of James and Sirius and stepped back as realization hit him.

Sirius reached out for Remus but James took his hand. "Give him a moment to process it. Remember how hard it was for you."

Sirius nodded and reached back for Aurora's hand even as she was reaching for him.

Remus felt three, no, four sets of eyes on him though he didn't recognize the beautiful blonde haired woman who was... holding Sirius' hand? "Am I dead then?" he asked finally.

"As dead as we are," James answered.

"It's a funny term, dead," Sirius mused. "I feel more alive now than I ever did in the before world."

"Maybe passed on is a more apt term," Aurora volunteered.

Remus considered the blonde haired woman thoughtfully.

"I'm so sorry!" Sirius exclaimed. "Where are my manners? Moony, this is my wife, Aurora Black. Aurora, you may remember Remus Lupin from school?"

"I do. He was the only one of you I ever saw in the library." Aurora smiled sweetly.

Lily and Remus laughed. "I like her already," Remus smiled at Aurora and took her hands in his briefly. "Though 'wife' is not a word I thought I'd ever hear coming out of this one's mouth!"

Sirius blushed and gazed lovingly at Aurora.

"There's a very funny story there featuring a completely tongue tied Sirius," James promised.

"I find that utterly impossible to believe but I can't wait to hear it." Remus smiled at James. At all of them. His brothers. Lily.

"Come with us then," Lily offered Remus her hand. He hesitated a moment thinking of his infant son, of Dora. They would still have each other. Perhaps better this way. He took Lily's hand accepting his fate.

"Wait!" Sirius cried. "Good Merlin, no," he muttered his heart breaking for Andromeda. Flashing back to "is she pregnant?" when they crashed the wedding. He suddenly felt sure that she had been.

Remus followed Sirius' eyes to his wife, Dora, and he felt his heart mend and break simultaneously. She'd be with him forever now and his heart rejoiced but Teddy.... Another orphaned baby in another wizard war. He reached out to her and she fell into his arms. He crushed her to his chest burying his face in pink hair.

"I'm so sorry!" Dora cried into Remus' shoulder." l couldn't wait behind not knowing if you were dead or alive. I couldn't. And... now... Teddy..."

Lily's eyes welled up remembering this exact scene 16 years ago.

Sirius spotted red hair several feet away and hurt for Molly and Arthur. He didn't know yet which son they'd lost but there was no mistaking that red hair in the mist. "Can you stay with them?" He spoke softly to James and Lily. "There's another to gather up."

James nodded. He and Lily approached Remus and Dora trying to provide comfort even while knowing there would be no comfort.

Sirius took Aurora's hand and led her to the red haired man. "George?" he guessed.

"Just Fred, " Fred said more softly than Sirius had ever heard him speak. He peered at Sirius and Aurora unsure who they were but glad he wasn't alone all the same though meeting strangers while naked was a bit odd. "And you are?"

"This is the thanks I get for helping you with your 'fuck the NEWTS' fireworks display? You don't even recognize me?" Sirius joked trying to lighten the mood.

Fred peered at Sirius in utter confusion and then cried "In the name of all that is holey including my brother's ear. Sirius Bloody Black. You look... bloody YOUNG." He threw his arms around Sirius who hugged him back.

"I'm really beginning to get a bit of a complex about how I looked before. Azakaban isn't a day spa!" Sirius snorted defensively.

Fred laughed despite the circumstance. "You looked quite well for someone who spent 12 years in the company of dementors but...uh....perhaps some Abracadabra Anti-Aging Adhesive wouldn't have gone amiss."

Aurora laughed.

Fred looked at Aurora. "So are you going to introduce us? Fred Weasley," he said holding out his hand which Aurora took. George would have wanted a lot more than a handshake from this one. The thought of George hurt deep in his soul but something about touching this woman seemed to make the pain less.

"Aurora Black," Aurora said as she shook Fred's hand.

Fred mentally scanned the Black family tree looking for an Aurora. Tonks' mom was Andromeda.....

"My wife, Aurora," Sirius volunteered helpfully.

"Wife, huh? So definitely an improvement over Grimmauld Place. A pleasure to meet you, Aurora," Fred said. "So..." He looked around at the misty room. "...is there more to this death thing? That's what I am, right? Dead."

"Afraid so, mate, but it's not so bad really," Sirius assured Fred.

"And there's infinitely more to it than this," Aurora smiled and took Fred's hand.

"Come on, let's get you out of here," Sirius said. He took Aurora's hand, put an arm around Fred's shoulder and apparated them back to the Potter House. They were followed quickly by James, Lily, Remus,and Dora.

Euphemia, Fleamont, and Regulus were sitting in the drawing room when they arrived.

"Remus, dear," Euphemia said hugging him. "I know this must be so hard to comprehend but we are so happy to see you."

"Good to see you, Remus," Fleamont said patting him on the back.

Remus smiled at James' parents as kind and welcoming as they ever were. He flashed briefly to the first time he stayed here the summer after their first year. His first ever sleep over. "It's wonderful to see both of you. I want you to meet my wife, Dora." He pulled Dora toward him. "Mia and Monty Potter."

"Nice to meet you," Dora said politely but a bit distantly. Leaving Teddy behind was beginning to suck at her soul like a famished dementor.

Euphemia seemed to sense this and hugged Dora tightly. "It'll get better, dear. I know it seems impossible now but it will."

Dora nodded and smiled a bit at Euphemia. It was hard to stay absolutely miserable in the face of such a caring and compassionate woman. She turned to James and Lily. "We weren't formally introduced. I'm Dora. You're clearly Harry's parents. I sort of thought people were exaggerating when they said Harry looked like you but they really weren't...."

"Dora, this is my wife, Aurora. Aurora, my cousin, Dora," Sirius said.

Aurora took Dora's hand and Dora felt better. She looked questioningly at Aurora who just smiled.

"It's nice to meet you," Aurora said.

"Oh! And Dora, my brother, your other cousin, Regulus," Sirius said.

Regulus tried to ignore that he was almost forgotten and got up from where he'd been hiding by the fire. "I'm Regulus." The one who agreed with the family when they disowned your mother for having you. "Nice to meet you."

Dora shook his hand, her auror's eyes registering the dark mark barely visible under a long sleeved shirt. "Nice to meet you too. You're only the second person I've met on my mom's side. Unless you count the one who killed me."

"I don't think you should count her," Regulus said seriously.

Dora laughed a bit. "No, I think she doesn't count."

"Bella?" Regulus asked.

"Good guess."

"Not a guess. Her crazy goes way back."

Sirius laughed. "That it does." He saw Fred out of the corner of his eye looking a little out of his element. "And Fred Weasley, of course," Sirius said. "This is my brother, Regulus. And Harry's parents and grandparents."

The dancing twin, Regulus remembered. The one without the bandage it would seem. Ears intact.

"We've heard much of your siblings, Ron and Ginny," Lily said.

"I'm sure I mentioned the genius twins, Prongs. They gave Harry our map," Sirius said.

"Oh yes, of course," James said. "It's an honor."

Fred looked between James and Sirius suspiciously. "YOUR map? Prongs? How could you not tell me that?" he asked Sirius accusingly.

"Your mum hated me enough without confessing to THAT," Sirius said. "I was supposed to be a responsible parent!"

"It is an honor to be in your presence. Wait...Moony????? Like a bloody werewolf????" Fred asked incredulously. "And, of course, Padfoot like a big black dog. How could you not tell us????" He tried to gather himself back up and keep his fanboying to a minimum. "I must say that the map was the most impressive piece of practical magic I've ever seen."

"I have to say it's really wonderful to finally be appreciated for our talents," James said.

"They always say great artists aren't truly understood until after they're dead," Sirius said.

Remus laughed. He'd missed them both so much...even what used to annoy felt like coming home now.

Lily rolled her eyes. "There will be no living with them now. Thanks Fred."

"Let's get all of you settled," Euphemia suggested. "The transition can be a bit much at first."

****************************************  
Euphemia hustled Remus and Dora into a guest room in the wing furthest from James and Sirius. "I'm sorry about your old room. We didn't think...well, we didn't think you'd be needing it and I thought it would be good for Regulus to be by his brother."

"It's no problem, Mia," Remus assured her. "Thank you for putting us up."

"Yes, it's very kind of you," Dora said trying to smile at Euphemia.

Euphemia hugged Dora. "You're very welcome both of you. I'll leave you to...adjust." She left.

"She's very kind," Dora said.

"She always has been," Remus said. "I used to spend a few weeks here every summer."

"It's a bit surreal being here. Seeing Sirius again. And James...Harry looks so much like him!" Dora exclaimed.

"We can talk about Teddy if you want," Remus said.

"I...I don't know what I want," Dora said sadly. "I want to hold him but I can never have that..."

Remus wrapped his arms around Dora wishing there was something he could do to take the pain away. For both of them.

Dora kissed Remus, her hands on his chest, unbuttoning his shirt.

Remus looked at her in surprise.

"I just...I need you," Dora looked at Remus, her eyes begging him to understand.

Remus nodded and kissed her. He spelled their clothes off and lay her down on the bed. He entered her gently realizing that he needed this as much as she did. To be with her. To not be alone.

Afterward, they lay in each other's arms. Dora caressed Remus' face (now played by Bradley James). "I think you can take age difference off your list of things to worry about with us."

"What?" Remus asked.

Dora guided Remus' hand to his face now smooth except for the scars that not even death could vanquish. "You're a bit of a pretty boy," she teased. "I could get used to this face." She kissed him, pulling him down on top of her.


	31. Old Friends and New

Sirius' and Aurora's Room. Later that night. Aurora slept curled in Sirius' arms. He watched her breathe in and out but couldn't find that peace himself. The war was here. The first battle fought. How long until he would be summoned by the resurrection stone? How long until Harry's death? Would he come here? COULD someone with Voldemort's soul stuck inside him come here? He heard a noise in the hall, a whispered curse and recognized Remus' voice. The footsteps headed downstairs. Sirius got up, put on pajama pants and a faded Led Zeppelin t-shirt, kissed Aurora on the forehead softly and followed Remus down to the kitchen.

 

Remus was making tea when Sirius arrived. Remus saw him and pulled out another cup.

"Couldn't sleep?" Sirius asked as he sat down at the table.

Remus sighed. "Just kept seeing Teddy. His first time to Hogwarts. First broom. First kiss..." His voice quavered. "I'll miss it all."

"I'm sorry," Sirius said softly. Not sure what else to say. "Tea though? After what you've been through, tea won't do." He conjured a bottle of firewhiskey while deftly floating the tea cups to the sink and dumping them. The firewhiskey poured itself into the now empty cups and the cups returned to their owners.

Remus watched the proceeding with interest. "How did you do the firewhiskey? I didn't see it come from anywhere."  
"It came from the air," Sirius smiled. "Benefits of marrying a Druid."

"Aurora is a Druid? I didn't know there were Druids anymore."

"They're quite secretive but they're out there though the ones I met weren't particularly pleasant. She thinks that some of the old families like mine may be descended from a Druid that they exiled. A Darach. Someone who took a darker path."

"That sounds like your family." Remus thought of Grimmauld Place and took a long drink of whiskey.

"That's what I said," Sirius laughed bitterly. "But there are some advantages. Like if you can see the air, which I can now, you can pretty much conjure anything from it. Most notably, firewhiskey."

Remus smiled. "An extraordinary skill and you're using it to get drunk. Some things never change."

"They do change," Sirius murmured softly. "Aurora changed everything."

Remus was touched by his heartfelt sentiment. "I see that she has. I look forward to getting better acquainted with her."

"I just never thought it could feel like this."

"Me neither until someone threw their cousin into my path," Remus winked knowingly at him.

"She wanted to be in your path!" Sirius said indignantly. "I just helped her a little bit since you seemed determine to reject the poor thing for her own good."

"A little bit?"

"Well, I did give her step by step instructions on how best to ensnare the elusive Moony," Sirius laughed. "It was quite a lot of help because you're quite a big git when it comes to this sort of thing especially for someone so clearly in love with her."

"Who's a big git?" James asked stumbling sleepily into the room.

The firewhiskey bottle jumped to attention and saluted a fresh tea cup as it flew through the air. James accepted it gratefully and sat down next to Remus.

"Moony's a big git where girls are concerned. 'I can't have a girlfriend because of my furry little problem'," Sirius mimicked.

"I have never once referred to my lycanthropy as my 'furry little problem'," Remus growled. "That would be the two of you."

"Well, it's hardly a problem, Moony, but you make it out to be this big production," James admonished. "Sirius tells me that you don't even lose your humanity anymore and yet he still had to go to extreme measures before you would date his cute, little cousin despite the fact that you were quite mad for her."

"What finally worked by the way?" Sirius asked curiously.

"Your death," Remus said softly, darkly, sadly. "For a time at least."

_FLASHBACK_

_Remus walked into Grimmauld Place alone after...he couldn't stop seeing Sirius fall through the veil lost forever. Couldn't stop hearing Harry screaming. Couldn't stop remembering that time that James and Sirius had bribed the house elves to make a birthday cake in the shape of a wolf. Couldn't stop hearing Sirius yelling "I've got a second heartbeat! I've got a second heartbeat!" at 3 in the morning when he finally cracked the animagus mystery. Couldn't stop seeing Sirius' concerned face when he woke up after a transformation beaten and bloody and bruised. Couldn't stop hearing "God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs". Was that only a few months ago? And most of all, he couldn't stop hearing the deafening silence of this house. Of the entire world in which he was now truly alone. He wasn't even sure how he ended up in Sirius' room. He didn't remember walking up the four flights of stairs. Didn't remember deciphering the various spells his teenaged best friend had put on the door to keep his evil family out. Didn't remember collapsing to the floor. But here he was laying in a fetal position on a Persian rug that surely cost more than his parents' house so he had to assume that all those things had happened. He also hadn't heard Dora arrive. Hadn't she been at St. Mungo's? Nor did he remember her putting a pillow under his head and pulling the comforter off the bed and laying it over him though he was becoming dimly aware that she was sitting near him on the floor, leaning against the post of the bed._

_"Please go," Remus croaked. He sounded like he hadn't spoken in weeks. How long had he been here?_

_"No."_

_Remus didn't have the strength to argue with her. Couldn't bear to look at her face that looked just a bit like Sirius' face. Bloody Black inbreeding._

_They stayed like that for what might have been minutes or hours. Remus seemed to have lost the concept of time. "Harry...."_

_"Dumbledore took the kids back to Hogwarts. Moody said he was...not doing well," Dora said softly._

_Remus knew that he should react to that. Should go to Harry and comfort him. That's what Sirius would have done regardless of his own personal feelings but Remus was glued to this Persian rug adrift in the universe._

_"How are you doing?" Dora asked Remus. She knew it was a stupid question. How did she think someone who had just watched his best friend, his brother die in front of him would be doing? But the empty shell of this man laying on the floor in front of her was more than she could bear and she needed to make him...what? Talk? Really even movement, a twitch would be a welcome improvement over what was seeming more and more like catatonia. She watched him closely. This man for whom she had real feelings whether he returned them or not. This man who seemed beyond reach, beyond repair. Perhaps there are only so many losses, so many heartbreaks one person can suffer before they just stop functioning. "Remus...." She laid down behind him and put her arm around him. "You don't have to talk. I just wanted you to know that you're not alone."_

_Whether it was her touch, her voice, or something else, Remus felt something dislodging itself inside of him and like a broken dam, everything that had been kept behind it came flooding out. His shoulders shook as he sobbed. He wasn't sure when he turned to face her, when he buried his tear stained face in the crook between her shoulder and her chest, when he finally ran out of tears and lay quiet in her arms._

_They lay on the floor hugging each other, heads face to face on the pillow. She gently stroked his hair until they fell asleep._

_When she woke the next morning, he was gone. Just a note that said, "You deserve better."_

_END OF FLASHBACK_

"You are a bloody fucking git, Moony," James said, pouring more firewhiskey.

"Really grade A, top-notch git," Sirius agreed.

"You don't understand. Neither of you do. You had these perfect, charmed lives."

"Are you fucking joking?" Sirius barked.

"Really, mate. Say what you want about me...." James said.

"Fine then, Sirius. I didn't see you out dating 22 year olds after Azkaban when your life was a mess and you couldn't be left alone for 2 minutes without falling apart," Remus snapped.

"I sure as hell would have had one been interested in me despite the fact that I was half crazy and a convicted murderer on the run from Azkaban. Everyone has baggage, Remus. If someone's willing to carry yours then you don't run out on them and leave a bloody note."

Remus grimaced and finished his drink. He poured another.

"So where did you go?" James asked.

"I couldn't stay in that house after. ... Your ghost was everywhere," Remus said quietly looking at Sirius. "It was somehow even worse than it had been when you were in Azkaban and I just didn't have the strength.... So I volunteered to go to the werewolf camps to try to talk them into joining our side instead of Voldemort."

"So you volunteered for a suicide mission," Sirius said. "Why not just follow me into the veil if that was your plan all along? Save some time?"

Remus sighed and chose not to engage. "Harry...he was devastated. It took every bit of strength I had to keep HIM from following you behind the veil," Remus said. "He needed me."

"He did," Sirius agreed. "But he wasn't at the werewolf camps, was he, Remus?"

"You, of all people, don't get to judge me. You were barely holding it together that last year," Remus said. "Day drinking in dirty pajamas wasn't helping Harry either."

"Enough," James said quietly. He knew there was more to Grimmauld Place than Sirius had admitted but a half a bottle of firewhiskey in wasn't the time to discuss it.

Remus took a long drink.

"So what changed your mind?" Sirius asked.

"Dora's more like Ted than Andromeda except that she's a Black and she's undeniable and she won't stop until she gets what she wants." Remus sighed. "It happened the night that Dumbledore died though it wasn't his death...it was Bill Weasley being bitten by Fenrir Grayback and Fleur not even hesitating before saying that she was going to marry him anyway. Note that Bill had been bitten by Grayback not on a full moon...."

"Dora didn't see the distinction and called you on your rubbish?" Sirius guessed.

"Yes and then Arthur and Molly did as well. They'd basically taken up your role in all this trying to push us together. Anyway, she wouldn't let it go."

_FLASHBACK_

_Remus and Dora sat on a faded couch in a hotel room in Hogsmeade awaiting the funeral that was to take place the next day._

_"I'm not giving up on you. That goes for tomorrow and the next day, too, in case you were wondering," Dora said. "I'm not going anywhere. I love you and I'm pretty sure you love me and so I'll be here waiting for you to wise up and see it."_

_"I do see it," Remus said quietly. "Love isn't the issue, Dora. You know that."_

_"I don't accept your lycanthropy as an issue. I just don't care...."_

_Remus interrupted, "But I'm...."_

_"Nor do I care that you're 13 years older than me. Nor do I care that some bigoted arseholes won't hire you. What I do care about is that you're funny and kind and brave and loyal and...okay the werewolf thing is a bit sexy."_

_Dora winked at Remus and he felt his heart flip over. He really did love her. Loved her deeply if he was being honest but...._

_"No buts." Dora put her fingers over his mouth silencing him. "The way I see it, we can do this one of two ways. One, we can continue like we have been where you go on dangerous missions and I spend every moment terrified that you're dead. We'll call that the Torture method because it has been absolute torture. Or two, we can kiss right now and see where this leads. We both have very dangerous careers, Remus, and if Sirius' death and now today has proven anything, you just don't know when it'll be your last battle. I'd really rather spend what time we have left whether it be days or decades with you."_

_Remus felt his resolve crumbling. "I don't...."_

_"So it's option 1 then," Dora said sadly._

_Remus sighed knowing that he'd lost the will to resist. "No." He kissed Dora gently on the mouth, felt her respond immediately, kissing him back, pushing her body against him. The kiss deepened, her hands were in his hair, under his shirt. He laid down on top of her, kissing her, needing her. He felt her legs wrap around him, pulling him against her. She was struggling to get his sweater off and he wasn't having much more luck with her t-shirt. He sat up pulling her with him and they shed clothes quickly still kissing, touching bare skin the instant it became visible. He pushed her back down, kissing her breasts, her stomach, his tongue exploring her thoroughly, her hips writhing as he pleasured her, her hands in his hair, moaning loudly as she came. He thrust into her and she gasped, pushing against him wanting more. He pushed into her deeply, his tongue in her mouth, his fingers pleasuring her, making her cry out again, loving the feel of her shuddering orgasm against his cock, the feeling of her nails digging into his back, feeling his own orgasm overtake him, leaving him breathless and spent and collapsed on top of her._

_Dora tried to catch her breath, tried to find something stationary in the universe to hold onto. Sex had not been like THAT before. She held on to Remus, who was still inside of her. She shuddered again and he moaned weakly. "So...um...that was a little bit amazing," she murmured. "In a mind blowing sort of way."_

_"Remind me why we waited so long to do that," Remus murmured into her shoulder. He knew he should really get off her but didn't seem to have control of any of his limbs just yet._

_"Because you're a selfless git," Dora reminded him as she gently ran her fingers through his hair, down his back, over a lifetime of scars. "Looking out for my best interests, you were, but just in case you were wondering, what we just did...totally in my best interests."_

_Remus smiled at her knowing she'd won a battle for which she would have fought to the death. Blacks didn't surrender and, in this moment, he was glad of it. Maybe it would be okay. "Rejecting you before...I did that because I love you not because I didn't. You understand that, right?" He found the strength to roll off her and pulled her onto his chest, wrapping his arms around her._

_"Not at first," Dora admitted. "Rejection feels like rejection and I really liked you. But Sirius and I talked about it and he told me how you are about your "furry little problem". We talked a lot about you and it made me understand you better and made me more determined not to let you kill us before we'd even had a chance to live." She felt him flinch when she said Sirius' name. The still raw emotions buried in dangerous missions bubbled to the surface. "He really wanted you to be happy, Remus. He loved you so much." She knew that he was crying softly. She held him giving him her strength. Definitely in her best interests._

_End of Flashback_

James and Sirius looked at each other in silence. Sirius finally spoke. "I'm sorry."

"You can't be sorry for dying," Remus snapped.

"I'm not. Dying may well have been the best thing that ever happened to me," Sirius said. "I'm sorry that you were hurt by it though. I had James and Lily to help me and then Aurora but you...."

"I had Dora. I wasn't alone...even when I begged her to leave me alone. She's as maddening as you are that way. Like some sort of annoying family trait."

Sirius smiled. "Good. You need someone who sees through your 'don't touch me, I"m a werewolf' rubbish."

"Agreed," James laughed. "So you married her and immediately had a kid? Did we forget to tell you about the birds and the bees?"

Remus grimaced. "That was definitely an accident. Her getting pregnant. I was terrified that Teddy would be a werewolf...so terrified that I left her briefly. Tried to join Harry on some mission that Dumbledore sent him on."

"You suggested to Harry, an orphan, that you would just abandon your child?" Sirius asked incredulously. "How did that go?"

"I think you know the answer to that," Remus said. "We didn't speak for several months."

"But you went back," James said.

"Harry was an absolute arsehole about it not that he'd been particularly nice to anyone since Sirius died...but he was right and after several firewhiskeys, I realized that and went home and just...let it go. All of it. It was this absolutely horrible time in the world but we were happy and once Teddy was born..." Remus' eyes filled with tears. "I asked Harry to be his godfather."

Sirius and James put their arms around Remus, comforting until the tears stopped.

"Andromeda and the Weasleys will love him, Remus," Sirius said. "He won't grow up like Harry."

"But he won't grow up with us," Remus said quietly.

"He won't. But he'll grow up in a world made better because you fought for it," James said softly. "That's something."

Sirius poured them all more firewhiskey. "To our wives," he murmured and all three did the shot. He repoured.

******

Aurora woke suddenly and reached for Sirius, surprised to find that he wasn't there. She heard soft crying coming from another room. I guess no one's really sleeping tonight. She got up and put on a robe and walked to the door of the room down the hall. She knocked softly, could hear the crying louder now. She opened the door and entered finding Dora sitting on the bed sobbing. Aurora sat down beside her and put her arms around her giving her light. Dora's cries slowly died away and she pulled away from Aurora a bit.

"Sorry I'm not normally a blubbering mess. Just this dream...it was so real...I could feel him. Smell him," Dora said tears threatening again.

Aurora put her hand on Dora's hand stroking it softly. She'd done the math, knew that the child couldn't be more than a month or two old. She couldn't even fathom this woman's pain but she could take away a little bit of it and so she did and she felt Dora calm a bit.

"I'm not sure we were officially introduced," Dora said. "Or I was just too upset to remember it."

"Aurora Black. I believe we're cousins-in-law? Though I'm a bit fuzzy."

"Sirius' wife. Yeah, I remember that. He and my mom are first cousins. I'm Dora Tonks...Lupin."

"I'm sorry to hear about..what happened. I had a daughter, Luna. She was 9 when I died."

"Luna Lovegood?"

"Yes. You know her?"

"Not well but I've fought beside her a few times. She's fierce though you'd never expect it. She's this odd little thing but then when things get bad, she's standing shoulder to shoulder with the rest of us."

"I'm always surprised to hear that she's some sort of honorary Gryffindor."

"It's Harry, I think. People want to fight for him. I'm not even sure fighting was his purpose for coming to Hogwarts today but it didn't matter because just his presence was the rallying cry."

"Did you see Luna? Is she okay?"

"Last I saw her, she was taking Harry to the Ravenclaw common room to look for something that he needed to defeat Voldemort."

"So he doesn't have the Ravenclaw horcrux yet. I'm sure he didn't want to fight then."

"Horcrux?"

Lily entered softly and sat down on the bed. "Little pieces of Voldemort's soul that he's got stored everywhere and until they're all destroyed, he's basically immortal."

"You're bloody joking," Dora said.

Aurora took Lily's hand. "He hasn't got the Ravenclaw horcrux yet and I'm sure he hasn't killed the snake. It's not imminent, Lily. I think Sirius would have seen it."

"Would he? Or was he too busy seeing Remus die?"

"What's going on? I feel like I'm missing something horrible," Dora said.

"Only that my son will have to let Voldemort kill him before this war can ever end," Lily said quietly.

"Harry's the last horcrux," Aurora explained.

Bloody hell...." Dora said stunned and saddened.

**********

"I can't believe we're all sitting around toasting our wives," James said.

"Speaking of which, I believe you had a funny story about Padfoot actually finding someone willing to marry him?" Remus said.

James laughed. "Well, Lily found someone willing to marry him. Let's not give him too much credit. He really just showed up and drooled a bit." He ducked a loaf of bread aimed at his head and continued. "After Sirius arrived, he had nightmares and trouble sleeping."

"As per usual," Remus agreed.

"I don't always have nightmares!" Sirius insisted.

James ignored him and continued. "So, as per usual, I started sleeping with him instead of Lily."

"Like two nights. You slept with me two nights!" Sirius said.

Remus ignored Sirius. "I did the same at Grimmauld Place when I could. Azkaban didn't help the sleep issues at all."

"Not at all," James agreed.

"It was two nights. Here anyway. And I shouldn't be held responsible for Grimmauld Place! I was locked up in my own personal hell," Sirius cried.

"Really most nights, we just stayed up all night talking or running around in the woods but the end result to Lily was the same," James explained.

"She had you to herself for 14 years!" Sirius exclaimed.

"So Mum suggested that Lily find someone else's bed for him to sleep in."

"My own mum....."

"So they lure me and Sirius to a picnic by the lake at Hogwarts and Aurora is there. Lovely woman -- you've seen her -- but our Sirius is normally quite good with the ladies regardless of loveliness."

"I remember all the times I had to sleep on the common room couch for that very reason," Remus confirmed.

"I still think James used a silencing spell," Sirius moaned.

"But this one had him completely flummoxed. Like I look over and he's just staring at her like an idiot. Not saying anything. I was embarrassed for him."

"Speechless? And you didn't use a spell?"

"I didn't."

"Did Lily?"

"I wondered at first but she swore she didn't and it wouldn't be like her. She'd think through the consequences of a love spell and not do it. She definitely wanted him occupied for more than the usual hour until he...."

"Right. Fucking her and forgetting her really wouldn't solve the problem."

"That's my wife you're talking about!" Sirius raged.

Remus bit back a smile and continued talking to James. "So how did the drooling idiot manage it?"

"So somehow they had managed to shake hands but then I look over and they're still holding hands just staring at each other."

"So she's in no better shape?"  
"None. I was sure Lily had done something so I pulled her away to find out what she did and how to undo it. By the time we returned, they were sitting on the ground snogging each other's brains out."   
"Even as a drooling idiot, he gets the girl," Remus looked annoyed.

"He's quite pretty. Girls kiss him," James shrugged.

"Are the two of you quite done?" Sirius asked tired of being made fun of. Especially about this...that day had been magical, perfect and they didn't understand.

"Someone's a bit sensitive," Remus smirked.

"You're treating the moment my life changed as a joke so yeah, I guess I'm sensitive."

Remus softened. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm still wrapping my head around all this."

"I'm sorry too. I know what she means to you and I think it's wonderful that you've found each other."

"It's okay. I'm not embarrassed by it really. Not anymore anyway," Sirius sighed. "I also told her I loved her right after the first time we had sex if you'd like to have a good laugh about that as well."

James and Remus were dying to laugh but feared the consequences.

"It's okay. Go ahead. You can have two minutes and then we never speak of it again."

James and Remus laughed hysterically.

Sirius glared at them watching the clock on the wall. "Two minutes."

The laughter stopped abruptly and all three took long drinks of the firewhiskey.

"Right after?" James asked.

"Fuck you."

"So right after then," Remus winked at James who covered a laugh.

"Fine. So Slutty McSlutterson fell in love and behaved like a dolt. You know, I'm not even bothered by it. I am in love with her and I was when I said it so you can both sod off."

"Okay, we're really done now," James promised. "I think."

"Did I see Regulus when we arrived?" Remus asked, changing the subject.

"You did," Sirius said. "He lives here as well."

Remus looked confused but wasn't sure how to phrase the question. He had gotten the distinct impression that Death Eaters went...elsewhere.....

"We were a bit confused as well," James said answering the unspoken question. "We had to go to Grimmauld Place to look for this stupid locket and there he was. In bad shape after having been in that house by himself for 18 years as you can imagine."

Remus cringed. "I can imagine."

"Turns out my baby brother finally found his backbone a couple years after getting the dark mark," Sirius explained. "He figured out that Voldemort had made a horcrux..." He looked at Remus.

"I have some idea what they are, yes, and I suppose, I shouldn't be surprised that Voldemort made one," Remus said disgusted.

"So Reg found out where he hid the horcrux - in a lake full of Inferi - and stole it but died in the process," Sirius finished proudly.

"Good Godric! How did he think he'd get away with it?" Remus asked.

"I don't think he did," James said quietly. "He took their house elf so the elf could get the horcrux to safety and destroy it."

"Suicide mission really," Sirius said.

"Bloody brave as hell is what it is," Remus said.

James nodded. "Makes me wonder about that Sorting Hat."

Sirius looked sad thinking about how different his brother's life might have been had the Sorting Hat put him in Gryffindor where he clearly belonged.

"It wouldn't have all been chocolate and roses, Sirius," Remus said. "Remember what being sorted into Gryffindor cost you."

James shuddered remembering Sirius broken and bleeding on the table they were currently sitting .

******************************************************************************************  
Fred lay in the grass staring up at the half moon. Sleep had eluded him and fresh air hadn't really helped either. Had he ever spent a night away from George? He couldn't think of one. Not a full night anyway though George had been spending more and more time with Angelina. Fred was happy for them. He was. But he missed George and...if he was being completely honest with himself, he was a bit jealous of how easy it was for them. For him, well, things were more complicated. Not that any of that matters NOW, he thought grimly. Dead. At 20.

"Ow!" Fred yelled sitting up quickly as someone fell over him in the darkness. "What the...."

"I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there," Regulus cried trying to right himself. "No one's ever been out here at night before."

"No worries, mate," Fred said. "You okay?"

"Yeah, mostly." Regulus brushed himself off and turned to Fred. "Fred Weasley, right?"

"Yeah and you're Sirius' baby brother?" Fred asked.

"Indeed. My lifelong goal, in fact, is to be known as just that," Regulus said with a slight edge to his voice. "Regulus Black," he said and politely extended his hand.

"Pleased to meet you, someone who I will never refer to as Sirius' baby brother ever again," Fred grinned a bit and shook Regulus' hand. "Unless you deserve it, of course."

Regulus took a second to see the joke but then smiled a bit. There was a bit of an awkward silence and then Regulus realized he was intruding and should leave. "I'm sorry. You were here first. I should go," Regulus said and began to stand up.

"You don't have to," Fred said quickly. Maybe too quickly. "I could use the distraction."

"You're sure?"

Fred nodded. "I am."

"Thanks." Regulus fully sat down next to Fred. "I don't sleep that well. Sometimes the fresh air helps."

Fred laid back down and looked at the moon.

Regulus seemed a bit surprised by the lack of formality but then did the same.

"So...um...I now feel obligated to provide a distraction," Regulus said, rifling through a list of potential topics to discuss with a virtual stranger. "How about quidditch?"

"It's a bit dark to play," Fred said.

"Well, yes. I was thinking more of 'do you enjoy quidditch? Did you play?'" Regulus glanced over at Fred. "Though I suppose we could spell up some lights. James just bought a bunch of Firebolt 5000s."

"Conversation is fine...for now though I would like to check out the Firebolts. I did play. Beater," Fred said and then felt the familiar ache as he thought 'with George'. "Did you?"

"Yes. For...Slytherin. I played mostly seeker. Occasionally chaser. We beat Gryffindor for the cup my fifth year. Possibly the only time I was ever better than Sirius at anything."

"Sounds like my older brothers, Bill and Charlie. Perfect grades, star Quidditch, head boy, etc. etc. That's why George and I just decided to have a good time. No way to live up to that," Fred said. "But...well...I've been in your house and I know your brother pretty well and it's hard to believe that anyone at Grimmauld Place was looking at his achievements as good ones. I mean, once you're sorted into Gryffindor, no Quidditch Cup is going to right the scales."

"Yes. And no. They really held out hope that Sirius was going to suddenly be who they wanted him to be, come back to the fold. The fact that he was bloody brilliant at everything made the loss that much harder on them. Their perfect son turned into a blood traitor. No matter what I did even if it was exactly what they wanted me to do, I would never be Sirius," Regulus spat bitterly.

"Sorry I didn't..."

"No, I'm sorry. I don't know why I just told you all that. I've actually never told anyone that," Regulus finished quietly. "Could you not tell my brother..."

"Your secret's safe with me. No fidelius charm needed," Fred said.

"Thanks," Regulus said and tried to change the subject back to a safer topic. "So you played for Gryffindor?"

"Yeah. I think the Sorting Hat just sees red hair and yells Gryffindor at this point."

"Funny. That was true of the surname Black until Sirius....." Why can I not stay away from this topic? Regulus wondered.

"My dad was Gryffindor prefect when that happened," Fred said. "Apparently, the whole school erupted in pandemonium. Slytherins were pissed. Gryffindors were cheering mainly because the Slytherins were pissed. He also said that Sirius used to get the most horrible howlers that he'd ever heard. Things that no one should ever say to their child like they wished he was dead and then the Slytherins would start making fun of him. I guess it was pretty awful. Dad and some of the other older Gryffindors went over and made them stop."

"I didn't know that," Regulus said softly and then sighed. "Though I'm not that surprised. It's pretty much what they said to his face during breaks. They were pretty horrible to him. Horrible enough that when the hat yelled 'Slytherin' I almost fainted in relief."

"Yeah, I guess it's tough to be the next guy up when the first guy gets a bat bogey hex to the face."

"Something like that," Regulus said a bit sadly wishing it had been something as innocent as a bat bogey hex. Crucio was more his family's modus operandi. "So now I need a distraction."

Fred laughed. "Okay. Fair enough." He thought for a moment. "What was your favorite part of Hogwarts?"

"Good question," Regulus said. "Really, it was mostly all okay. I guess my favorite...you're going to think I'm a giant nerd...."

"I'll try VERY hard not to judge," Fred said in mock seriousness.

"The library," Regulus said quickly.

Fred laughed.

"So much for not judging!" Regulus exclaimed in mock offense.

"I'm not judging. It's just the absolute opposite of what Sirius would have said."

"Sirius wasn't much for the library, no. It was one of the many perks of the place," Regulus said.

"Well, I can't say I really ever stepped foot in there. At least not for non-nefarious purposes," Fred admitted.

"Well, what was your favorite?" Regulus asked.

Fred thought for a moment. "Making people laugh. George..." He felt his heart break but went on. "George...he's...he was my twin brother...he and I would spend every waking hour thinking up brilliant pranks to play on unsuspecting...well everyone."

"You sound like James and Sirius," Regulus said with a bit of thinly veiled disgust.

Fred turned a bit toward Regulus and quietly explained, "My sister was tricked by some Voldemort-possessed diary her first year. An 11 year old child tricked into doing things that hurt people, almost killed them. The war didn't truly start in earnest until the last year or so but it had been brewing for years which I'm sure was true when you were at Hogwarts too. We just thought that maybe we could shine a light in that darkness, you know? In a world where 'dead at 20' is pretty common, why not live and laugh a little first?"

Regulus considered this for a long time. There was no light in his darkness. Never really had been if he was being honest though living with the Potters and reconciling with Sirius had made it better. "I was dead at 18," he finally said. His brain swirled with a million things he wanted to say but none of them quite formed into coherent thoughts.

"George and I turned 20 last month," Fred said softly. "You and I, we may have been fighting on opposite sides, but still teenage casualties of war."

"Not on opposite sides," Regulus said. "Not when I died anyway. "

"I thought Sirius said you were a Death Eater?" Fred asked. "Though you seem okay for a Death Eater and then you're here and not...elsewhere...."

Regulus felt his arm, always burning, itching. He couldn't make it stop. Didn't deserve to have it stop. He was a Death Eater and he did unspeakable things in their service and he probably did deserve to be elsewhere.... But he did one good thing. Or tried to anyway. He knew that Fred was waiting for some sort of explanation. "I became a Death Eater when I turned 16, the spring of 5th year. My rebellion to Sirius' rebellion had been to go all in. Easy enough to do when your blood is purer than everyone else's. It's expected really," he said bitterly.

Fred tried to remember what he was doing the spring of his 5th year. Celebrating a Quidditch Cup and testing joke potions on first years. He was still a child the spring of his 5th year. Wasn't Regulus?

"The more Sirius became...well what he is...the deeper I got into the dark arts, the pure blood mania. I was finally the good son. Finally the one they were proud of. The one who didn't get his name burned off the family tree." He swallowed hard. "But the Dark Lord was...he wasn't what I expected. Was far worse than I expected. The plans he had.... Not even the pure blood families were comfortable with his vision. A vision that is probably the law about now, I suppose. Rounding up and killing muggle borns, maybe half bloods as well. Even pure bloods weren't safe if they didn't 100% agree with him."

Fred nodded. "Pretty much sums up the world right now. My family is pure blood and we've been in hiding for months."

Regulus nodded without surprise. "The irony is that HE is not even pure blood! Not that anyone dared to point that out. I kept waiting for the Order to kill him but then I realized that he had made this thing called a horcrux which is sort of a little storage cupboard for a bit of your soul so as long as you have the horcrux, you're basically immortal."

"Good bloody Godric," Fred breathed.

"You have no idea. How they're made.... Well, you'll never sleep again if I tell you. Anyway, he needed a house elf to help him hide it so I volunteered Kreacher. I was beginning to have misgivings about the whole thing, about being a Death Eater, but...I still wanted to make him happy," Regulus explained. "It turned out that drinking poison was involved and he didn't care to do that himself which is what he needed the house elf for. Kreacher barely survived and when he told me what happened.... I know it's stupid. He's just a house elf but...but he was my friend. My only true friend...."

Fred couldn't quite wrap his head around a life so lonely that Kreacher looked like a good option but didn't say anything.

"What he did to Kreacher...it was more than I could ignore, the proverbial last straw, so I decided to steal the horcrux. It all worked out quite nicely except I had to drink the poison and then got eaten by Inferi after I gave the horcrux to Kreacher to destroy. Of course, I learn from my dear brother that the Dark Lord has made seven of these bloody things and this Harry chap has to find them all, destroy them and then sacrifice himself before the Dark Lord will be mortal so it was all quite depressing and virtually pointless."

"Harry has to sacrifice himself?" Fred asked. "What the hell does that mean?"

"What it sounds like. He's the last horcrux. The Dark Lord accidentally made him a horcrux when the spell rebounded onto him. Apparently, Harry's quite a skilled parselmouth. You think that came from the Potters?"

"No," Fred moaned. "Not Harry...." He flashed to Ron and Ginny at Harry's funeral and blinked back tears.

Regulus realized too late. "He's your friend. I should have known that. I'm sorry," he said.

"No, I'm glad you told me," Fred said softly trying to digest the information. "He's my baby brother's best mate. Has been since they met on the train their first year. And my sister, I sort of thought they'd end up happily ever after, you know?"

"I am sorry," Regulus said.

"Thanks," Fred said softly. "So you knew that you'd die if you took the horcrux and you did it anyway? I think the Sorting Hat was dead wrong about you."

Regulus smiled to himself in the moonlight. He quite liked Fred weird as that may be considering his status as blood traitor. That status didn't matter much right now though.

"Do you still have the dark mark?" Fred asked suddenly curious.

Regulus looked uncomfortable. "Yes."

"Can I see it?" Fred asked. "I've never seen one up close. At least not one that wasn't trying to kill me."

Regulus sighed and rolled up the sleeve of his left arm.

"Lumos," Fred muttered and leaned over Regulus a bit to get a better look. He became suddenly very aware of Regulus underneath him and tried desperately to focus on the tattoo. "That is...really hideous." He carefully made his way back to his spot on the ground trying not to think about Regulus' handsome face in the glow of the lumos spell, the way he smelled.... Get it together, Fred. Just because you occasionally have these thoughts doesn't mean you act on them with Sirius' brother. Who isn't gay. Who probably isn't gay....

"I know," Regulus said.

Fred was startled. WHAT? How can he know?

"It's hideous. I tried to flay it off a few months ago but Sirius thought disfigurement wasn't the answer. What does he know," Regulus said bitterly.

"The tattoo...." Fred said relieved.

"Of course. What did you think I was talking about?"

"The tattoo. What else could it be?" Fred felt flustered. You like this guy as a friend and that is it. Then why can't I stop thinking that his lips look extremely kissable?


	32. The Resurrection Stone

Back in the kitchen. The firewhiskey bottle had been emptied and joined by its quarter full brother.

"I must say, I'm a bit drunk," Remus admitted.

Sirius wondered which of the four Remuses was speaking. "That's nonsense...I'm completely sober," he slurred.

"Was that English?" James asked, his head mere inches from falling on the table.

"Wait! You're drunk?" Sirius asked incredulously. "You've barely had half a bottle. That's nothing in terms of werewolf tolerance. "

"I'm not sure I've ever seen him drunk. Well, not while drinking with him anyway," James slurred.

"Moony..." Sirius looked at the Remus on the far right with suspicion. "...if that's even who you are... have you been feeling at all wolfy since you got here?"

"It's a half moon so sort of the best part of the month for me but...no. Now that you mention it," Remus pondered. "Do you think the curse...."

Remus was interrupted as James' head slammed onto the table. Remus looked at James for a moment and continued as if uninterrupted, "...may have lifted when I died?"

"Not sure," Sirius said to the new Remus who had arrived within his field of vision around the time that James' passed out. "Dying doesn't get rid of dark marks but I guess those are more voluntary."

A sudden pounding on the outside door made them both sober up slightly.

James moaned but didn't move.

"Just a second," Sirius slurred, staggering toward the door. "I'm coming." He threw open the door to Dumbledore (now played by Jude Law)...and Snape (still Alan Rickman). "Snivellus?" He slurred incredulously.

Snape looked disgusted whether by the drunkenness or the Marauders in general was anybody's guess.

Lily, Dora, and Aurora entered the kitchen follow by Fred and Regulus all of whom had heard the pounding .

Regulus saw Snape and hung back from the group.

"What's going on?" Fred asked. He saw Snape and sneered. "What the hell is HE doing here? He killed Dumbledore!"

"Albus says that he asked Snape to kill him," Aurora told Fred.

Fred looked skeptical.

"Severus?" Lily asked and walked a few steps toward him.

Snape's look of disgust turned to a look of unconditional love.

Sirius growled at Snape.

Remus walked over and put what he hoped was a calming hand on Sirius' shoulder, sensing trouble.

"What do you want?" Sirius glared at Snape. "Here to sniff around another man's wife, Snivellus?"

Fleamont and Euphemia joined the party. "I don't recall inviting you back into my home, Albus," Fleamont growled.

"Albus thought you may want an update on Harry but I would certainly prefer to be anywhere but here if that is not the case," Snape snarled.

"We do want an update. Please," Lily cried, touching Snape's arm.

Sirius' eyes fastened on the touch, anger rising.

"I'll wake James," Aurora said hoping to draw Lily's attention away from Snape.

Lily finally focused on the drunk Marauders. "Seriously?"

"It was an accident," Sirius said having the grace to look sheepish.

Aurora murmured a few words over James and suddenly alcohol began oozing from his pores.

"That's really disgusting...and yet sort of brilliant," Sirius said.

"I'm glad you think so because you're next," Aurora said and murmured the spell before Sirius could consider a proper defense.

"ARGH! It feels AWFUL!" Sirius moaned.

"Stone cold sober," Remus said quickly holding up his hands to protect himself. "Nothing to expel here. Werewolf tolerance."

Dora laughed slightly and walked over to Remus. He put his arms around her.

Aurora looked suspicious but left Remus' blood alcohol level intact.

James slowly raised his head off the table looking like death. "What happened?" He looked around at the kitchen full of people, looked perplexed at Sirius whimpering with his head over the sink, then saw Snape. "Snape." Hatred.

Regulus quietly stood half behind Fred, his arm itching and burning even more in the presence of another dark mark. The pain was making him nauseous.

Fred looked at Regulus quizzically. "You okay, man? You look worse than those two and they look like death."

Regulus did indeed look awful or as awful as any of the Blacks could look. His alabaster skin was much closer to green than white and the look in his almost black eyes was abject terror. He looked everywhere but at Snape.

"He's on our side, I guess," Fred whispered to Regulus realizing who was upsetting him. "According to Dumbledore anyway. He's harmless." He reconsidered. "Probably harmless."

Regulus tried to relax. "If they knew what I did...."

"I've got your back, mate," Fred said. "He won't lay a finger on you."

Regulus tried to smile, tried to breathe normally. Tried to remember when anyone had ever had his back.

"So if everyone is feeling more alert, we have little time to spare," Dumbledore said. "I believe the resurrection stone will summon you shortly and I need to know that you will play the role I've asked of you." He looked pointedly at James, Lily, and Sirius and then extended his stern stare to include Remus.

"What role? Resurrection stone? Like the fairy tale?" Remus asked in confusion.

"Not a fairy tale, Moony," Sirius said.

"Presumably not," James corrected.

"Who's going to summon us?" Remus asked.

"Harry. Right before he allows Voldemort to kill him," Sirius glared at Dumbledore.

"What in the bloody hell are you on about?" Remus asked a horrible sense of danger rising in his gut.

"Perhaps had you spent more time filling in your...partner in crime... rather than getting stinking drunk..." Snape snarled.

"Shut it." Remus ordered and Snape complied. He turned to Dumbledore. "Explain."

"Voldemort has made several horcruxes out of pieces of his soul. As long as the horcruxes are left undestroyed, he is immortal," Dumbledore explained succinctly no time to lose.

Regulus shuddered. Fred put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Regulus was surprised at how much better he felt and smiled gratefully.

"I believe Potter has found and destroyed all the horcruxes but the snake and, of course...." Snape explained.

"Himself," Lily glared at Dumbledore.

"The parselmouth, the way he could see Voldemort's actions...." Sirius said to Remus. "...they were all signs of the horcrux...." he trailed off. He couldn't say it. He looked at Remus, at the horrorstricken look on his face and knew he didn't need to.

"You knew?" Remus asked Dumbledore.

Dumbledore nodded. "The time has come. He'll sacrifice himself regardless of what you say to him but you can make this so much easier for him."

"You really think we're going to do something to make it harder for him?" Sirius spat. "We'll play this the way you want but if he dies and doesn't end up here...."

Dumbledore nodded. Understood that tonight may well end any relationship he had with these people. "I understand."

"Why wouldn't he end up here?" Dora asked.

Lily looked at Sirius for an explanation.

"He will," Sirius assured Lily softly. "I don't know what I was saying."

"You know how he gets, Lily," James said. "Just talking out of his arse."

Lily relaxed.

Remus looked at James and Sirius suspiciously. While talking out of his arse wasn't uncommon for Sirius, what he said in that state was still generally true and well reasoned. He just hadn't been born with the same self-censor that everyone else had been.

"So what now?" Fred asked.

"We wait," Dumbledore said.

The group looked awkwardly around at each other. Seconds ticked by like hours.

"I must ask...who else in this room has a dark mark," Snape drawled.

Regulus flinched.

Fred moved to better shield Regulus.

"Looking to turn your coat again, Snivellus?" Sirius asked. "How many times would that be now? Is it difficult to remember which side you're on? Do you keep a chart?"

Snape glared at Sirius with eyes full of hate. "Doing the real work is certainly more complicated than hiding in your mummy's house."

Remus moved closer ready to prevent an escalation.

Sirius glared at Snape. "At least my mother wasn't fucking whatever muggle would have her."

Snape took a step toward Sirius but Remus stopped him.

"Not tonight, Severus," Remus said quietly. "Everyone's on edge."

"You know what I never understood about Snape being a Death Eater, Pads?" James asked.

"What's that, Prongs?" Sirius asked.

"Well, as you rightly pointed out, he's not even a pure blood. Just how did he think that whole thing would play out for someone like him?"

"Interesting question. Maybe he thought his little gang of murderers would just forget if he killed enough muggle borns?"

"Do not forget that your brother bore the dark mark as well, Black," Snape snarled.

"My brother died a hero trying to make Voldemort mortal because it was the right thing to do not just because he was obsessed with someone else's wife!" Sirius spat.

Snape seemed a bit surprised to hear this and then realized. "So the other dark mark is Regulus Black." He walked toward where Regulus stood behind Fred.

Regulus steeled himself and walked to meet him. "Severus."

"There are a lot of people who would like to see you tortured for eternity if they knew what you did," Snape said.

"I believe the same could be said for you," Regulus replied. "Was she worth it?"

Snape glowered at him. "Was finally winning your cowardly brother's affection worth it to you?"

"James brings up a good point," Regulus said icily.

James cringed knowing that tone.

"How did you think this would play out for your half blood self? Did you really expect the pure bloods to suddenly accept you as one of their own? Forget that your father was a Muggle? Where is he anyway?" Regulus glared at Snape his voice a mixture of ice, loathing, and superiority.

"I expected my skills to merit acceptance as they did. Unlike some who relied on their surname alone," Snape snarled in disgust.

"You want to test that theory?" Regulus' face was dead white, dangerous, inches from Snape's. Every fiber of his being screamed crucio but he contained himself. Barely.

Sirius recognized the look on Regulus' face and quickly stepped in between them. "Reg, as much as I would like to see where this is headed, now is maybe not the best time. Witnesses and all." He pulled his brother away from Snape conjuring a tumbler of firewhiskey and landing it in Regulus' hand as he pushed him into a chair. "Let's all just take a step back into our own corners."

Regulus sat gripping the glass with shaking hands. Blind rage coursing through his veins.

"The voice of reason?" Remus joined Regulus and Sirius at the table. "Can't say I've seen that look on you before."

Fred joined them at the table as well sitting beside Regulus. "Another glass?" he asked Sirius and smiled as a glass wafted into his outstretched hand. "Cheers."

 

Regulus registered Fred sitting next to him. Somehow Fred's good opinion of him seemed important so he tried to calm down. "Sorry about that," he muttered mostly to Fred. He focused on breathing, focused on not crushing the glass in his hands.

"Yeah, can't stand that git," Fred said nonchalantly. "Been asking for a good punch in the face for awhile now if you ask me."

Regulus smiled a bit as the ice started to melt.

Aurora sat down on Sirius' lap. "Everything okay over here?"

"As well as can be expected," Sirius said putting his arms around her.

Dora joined Remus, sitting on his lap and resting her head against his head. Her hair was too brown for his liking. He put his arms around her and hugged her tightly. After this was over, he had to find a way to help her.

James joined the group as well though keeping a firm eye on his wife who was talking to Snape and Dumbledore on the other side of the room. He looked at Regulus and said, "once this is over, we'd be happy to help eviscerate him, if you'd like."

"Let's not discount the entertainment value of a broken nose," Fred said. "Not to mention the satisfaction of your fist causing that crunching noise."

"You're all a bit violent for Gryffindors, you know that?" Regulus said surprised. "I shouldn't have let him bait me. He's just really always rubbed me the wrong way. And you're right James. He's not a pure blood but he was always trying to ingratiate himself and really did with some of the true believers like Bella. He's really working with the Order? I mean, I know what Dumbledore said but I sort of figured he was playing the old man...."

"I'm still not convinced that he's not," James muttered.

"Do you feel that?" Sirius asked as he, James, Remus, and Lily disappeared, summoned by the resurrection stone.

" Harry's really going to do it," Fred said sadly.

"Why does Sirius think that Harry won't come here?" Dora asked.

"If he dies with a piece of the Dark Lord's soul inside him, it seems nebulous at best, doesn't it?" Regulus said quietly.

Fred looked ashen.

Regulus felt a bizarre desire to comfort Fred, to touch him. He tentatively put his hand on Fred's shoulder for a moment.

Fred looked up at Regulus gratefully. He hoped he looked grateful anyway because the other feelings were probably inappropriate. Weren't they?

The four returned within moments. Lily cried on James' shoulder. Sirius and Remus returned to sit with their wives, visibly shaken.

"How's he doing?" Fred asked.

"Terrified and trying to act brave," Sirius croaked trying to master his own emotions.

"What now?" Snape asked.

"I am not sure, actually, though I suspect it will become obvious soon enough," Dumbledore murmured.

The tortured silence continued. Fred looked particularly uncomfortable. If George were here, he was sure they would have transfigured every light fixture in the place to start spurting out soap bubbles by now. Anything to lighten the mood. If there was ever a group in need of a laugh, it was this one. All of them basically just waiting for Harry to die and then to see if he was doomed to an eternity of torture. He glanced at Regulus who seemed to be occupying his time trying to scrape the dark mark off his arm. Snape's presence must be making it worse, he thought. Bad enough to make a stupid choice as a kid but even worse when it came with a permanent reminder and he did think of Regulus being a Death Eater as a stupid, childish choice bearing no relationship to who he really was and he was fairly certain that those ridiculously long eyelashes only factored in a tiny bit.

Regulus looked at Fred.

Fred realized that he should probably look away though when you've been staring at someone for as long as he'd been staring at Regulus, the time for trying to hide it had probably passed. "I was just thinking someone needs to tell a joke," Fred said hoping he sounded like someone who wasn't really thinking about eyelashes.

Regulus almost laughed out loud. "Do you know one?"

"Not one that would keep the peace," Fred admitted. "I was considering turning that basket of tomatoes over there into emus and setting them loose in the kitchen though."

Regulus laughed quietly. "I dare you." He winked at Fred.

Did he just wink at me? Did he just DARE me? "Aren't you full of surprises?" Fred murmured. "Care to help?"

The two focused on the tomatoes and suddenly the room was full of angry emus. Angry purple emus.

"Why are they purple?" Fred asked astounded.

"Why not?" Regulus countered.

"Why not indeed!" Fred laughed. Chaos ensued as everyone tried to run from the angry emus. Angry or.... "Why are they in heat?" Fred asked.

"Um...uh...." Regulus stuttered. Did I do that? "Um...why not?"

Fred laughed but the crazy thoughts involving lips and eyelashes and what would it feel like to run my hands through his hair? were growing bolder in his head. "Why not indeed."

After several minutes, the horny purple emus had been either returned to tomatoes by Remus or freed into the wild to live out their lives looking for love, sweet, love by James and Sirius and order had mostly been restored.

"Who did that?" James gasped collapsing next to Fred.

"Bloody brilliant!" Sirius agreed. "It reminds me of the time that we turned all the Slytherins into Christmas turkeys."

"Yes, that was a bloody good time," Regulus growled.

"Oh yes. Uh. Sorry?" Sirius said.

"I never understood why the gobbling didn't stop once McGonagall finally returned their bodies to normal," Remus said.

"I never understood how the three of you were never expelled," Regulus said.

Snape smirked.

Regulus saw it, didn't like it. "Turning the walls of our common room into pink slime that multiplied when contacted with human skin? Now THAT was funny. Poor Severus had to hide in his room for a week because he couldn't get it out of his hair. I believe it may have mixed poorly with the grease."

Sirius and James dissolved into a fit of laughter. "Oh! It's even better now!" Sirius gasped.

Snape looked like he'd greatly enjoy killing all people with the surname of Black.

Dumbledore vanished suddenly.

"Maybe we'll finally get some answers," James said unsure whether answers were something he really wanted.

The uncomfortable silence returned, the purple emus and greasy pink hair forgotten and not even Fred had the heart to disrupt the silence this time.


	33. War!  What Is It Good For?

The group sat in silence for what felt like hours but may have only been minutes. When Dumbledore returned, they all looked up, some expectantly, some dreading what they were about to hear. 

"I believe it may have worked," Dumbledore said quietly. "The final battle has not yet been fought but there is every reason to hope. The horcrux appears to be destroyed and I believe Harry is not dead."

The sighs of relief, the sounds of breathing that had stopped and started again filled the room. 

James and Sirius rose simultaneously. "I can't just sit here," Sirius said as he rose. "Lift the veil?"

James nodded. "Yes."

"You won't be able to help him," Aurora said. "We can't touch...."

"Doesn't matter. I can't just sit here and wait," Sirius explained.

"Who's coming?" James asked.

"Where are we going? What do you mean 'lift the veil'?" Remus asked. 

"Oh yeah. The drooling idiot over there can lift the veil between worlds. Did I not mention that? Brilliant as usual, that one," James explained.

Snape looked as if he would beg to differ.

"So we apparate to Hogwarts. I think the bit of trees beside the castle? We'll be mostly hidden but should still be able to see," Sirius suggested.

James nodded. "If the battle goes inside, the passage under the Gnome of Firth?"

Everyone apparated to Hogwarts and Sirius lifted the veil with everyone helping to hold it up. They arrived in time to see a sobbing Hagrid carrying Harry's "dead" body toward the castle. Lily gasped. 

"Is he dead?" Fred asked.

"We would have been summoned to the In Between," James said.

"Not if...." Sirius began and then looked at Lily. If he was dead and elsewhere, there would be plenty of time for her to mourn. "I'm sure he's not dead."

They watched as everyone filed out of the castle, devastated at the site of Harry's lifeless body. Fred saw Ron, Hermione and poor Ginny sobbing and involuntarily moved toward them. Regulus caught him by the arm and held him back. Fred looked at Regulus, eyes filled with horrible pain.

Regulus shook his head. "I'm sorry but you can't, Fred," he said gently. "You belong here now." He hugged Fred before he'd really thought it through, the need to make that horrible pain in his eyes go away topped any other thoughts. Fred hugged him back tightly and then they both seemed to become awkward together and broke apart. 

Voldemort put a silencing spell on the jeering crowd and spoke to them of their defeat but the spell didn't seem to hold and the group of not-ghosts began to look hopeful. It was then that Neville Longbottom ran toward Voldemort.

"Frank and Alice's boy," Sirius told James. 

"Just like them," James said proudly.

They watched Neville defy Voldemort with pride and amazement. 

Regulus looked uneasy, subconsciously tearing the flesh off his arm that looked like it was on fire. Fred grabbed Regulus' wrist and held it tightly before Regulus could start picking off chunks of flesh. 

The group then looked on in horror as Voldemort placed the sorting hat on Neville's body-bound head and then set it on fire...and then...chaos. People, giants, centaurs, the sword of Gryffindor. The entire courtyard had come to life and it was all fighting Voldemort and the Death Eaters. 

When Kreacher ran out of the castle leading an army of angry house elves yelling "Fight the Dark Lord, in the name of brave Regulus!" Regulus felt tears coming to his eyes. "Kreacher...."

Even Sirius seemed willing to forgive the hellish house elf. He put his arm around his brother and kissed the side of his head. "Brave Regulus may be the only thing that house elf said that ever made sense."

"They're moving inside," James yelled to be heard over the chaos. 

Sirius dropped the veil, apparated them all to the agreed upon passage, and lifted the veil again to the Great Hall. Molly and Bellatrix were dueling. Bellatrix fell and Voldemort began screaming.

"Go Mom!" Fred yelled.

"I have to say, I greatly enjoyed that," Sirius said. 

"So did I," Dora said.

"Was there anyone Bella didn't kill?" Regulus asked. 

"Dolohov got me," Remus said.

"No idea how I died," Fred said.

Regulus looked at Fred in surprise. "None?"

Fred shook his head. "None."

"Harry!" Lily shrieked.

"Harry," Sirius and James said together both drowning in relief.

"Alright, Potter!" Fred yelled. 

Voldemort and Harry began circling each other. 

"He's mortal now," Regulus reminded the tense group surrounding him. "And severely outnumbered." 

When the two circling wizards yelled their curses, "Avada Kedavra! Expelliarmus!" the group held its collective breath. 

"He has the elder wand," Aurora assured Sirius, Lily and James who were standing closest to her. "He can't be defeated."

It was mere seconds before Aurora was proved right as Voldemort's wand flew to Harry and his own killing curse rebounded upon his now completely mortal body. Chaos erupted but this time it was celebration not war. Everyone was hugging and crying tears of joy regardless of dimension. 

Regulus stood slightly away from them staring blankly at his arm. Fred joined him. 

"It's over mate!" Fred rejoiced. "We won! What's wrong?"  
Regulus looked up at Fred, his eyes filled with tears that he couldn't seem to fight back. "It stopped. It's...it's gone." He held out his arm to Fred for inspection. Only a faint scar remained. "He's gone. It's finally over." 

Fred realized for the first time looking into Regulus' eyes just how much that mark had cost him. Not just his brother or his life but any bit of love he had for himself, any bit of pride. The mark had left nothing in its wake but self loathing. He put his arm around Regulus and whispered, "you're damn right it's over and we won and that includes YOU." Fred dragged Regulus back to the celebrating group. Mostly celebrating anyway.

"Sirius!" Regulus yelled and rushed over to catch his brother as he collapsed to the ground and the veil collapsed with him.


	34. Bittersweet Victory

The shock of going from happy chaos to absolute quiet was alarming for a moment but then the happy chaos slowly spread to their world as well. 

Aurora pulled an already made potion out of her bag and handed it to her dazed husband.

"How did you know I would need this?" Sirius asked trying his best not to vomit the potion back up. 

"Because I know you," Aurora smiled and kissed him and then made a face. "Ugh. It IS awful. I thought you were just being a baby about it." 

Sirius took her hand and looked into her eyes. "You saw Luna, yes? Completely fine."

"I saw her," Aurora smiled through happy tears. "I'm so proud of her." 

Sirius laid his forehead against her own. "Me too." He smiled at her. "She is my step-daughter after all even though it'll be another 100 years before I'll meet her."

Dora stared around the Great Hall not really seeing it. The adrenaline of the battle had driven everything else from her brain but now it was back. She felt Remus come up behind her and put his arms around her. She relaxed a bit. They would be together for eternity and she was grateful but Teddy...would that hole in her heart ever really heal?

"I know it doesn't mean a lot right now," Remus said softly to her. "I've been telling myself this since we got here and it really hasn't helped but...we didn't leave him alone, Dora. He's got Andromeda, the Weasleys, Harry.... He's not going to grow up living in a cupboard under the stairs surrounded by people who hate him. He's going to grow up surrounded by love. It just won't be ours." He felt his voice break, the tears falling down his cheeks.

Dora turned to him and hugged him tightly. They had each other and they'd find a way to cope. She looked up and took his face in hers and kissed him gently on the mouth. "It'll be okay, Remus. We'll be okay."

James took Lily's hands and pulled her toward him. 

"A part of me was hoping....I know it was wrong..." Lily began.

"Me too," James said softly. "A chance to actually get to know him, to be his father...."

"But he'll have a future now. The life that he should get to lead before he comes to this world," Lily said. "But it feels a little like losing him all over again."

James hugged her tightly. "I know."

Fred stood beside the table where he'd seen his body. It had been a fleeting glimpse in all the chaos and he wasn't even sure he'd seen it but now that it was quiet again, he knew. He somehow felt Regulus' presence before he saw him.

"You okay? You seem a little barmy." Regulus sat down on the table. The Gryffindor table, he noted. "Different view from this side," he said. 

"What?" Fred shook his head and then fully registered Regulus sitting there. Almost on top of his corpse. "I...I saw my...corpse. Sort of where you're sitting."

Regulus jumped up in horror and Fred bit back a laugh. 

"It's okay. Imagine how many people will be eating their dinners right there in the before world?" Fred joked. "I kinda fancy being eaten on actually." His brain took a left turn then imagining Regulus doing the eating. Snap out of it, Fred. "Sort of always at the Gryffindor table now."

"I've no interest in spending eternity at the Slytherin table, thanks." 

"You can join me over here if you want." 

"I think I'd like that," Regulus said quietly. 

Fred was pondering a response and what it would feel like to push Regulus down on the Gryffindor table and....

Fred's thoughts were prevented from becoming any more x-rated by Sirius standing on the Slytherin table and announcing the need for a victory party. Outside. 

By the time everyone had trooped outside, Sirius and James had conjured everything they could think of for a first class victory party from the obvious -- firewhiskey fountains -- to the bizarre -- polka dotted elephant/tiger hybrids which everyone agreed were, frankly, disturbing. Tents, bonfires, a discotheque that looked straight out of "Saturday Night Fever" all adorned the courtyard. It soon became clear that the word of the victory and the party had crept out and suddenly wizards were coming in from everywhere. Soldiers from all the wizarding wars embraced as old friends as the music played and the firewhiskey flowed. 

Aurora, Dora, and Lily found seats a bit away from the music and settled in with some butter beers. 

Aurora marveled at the absolute circus that her husband had just created and then said, "you know, I always sort of assumed this is what the Gryffindor common room looked like at any given time."

Lily sighed. "You have no idea. Though that horrible Ele-tiger thing is new and really not at all okay. The best and worst parts of being sequestered in a tower with James Potter and Sirius Black," she laughed. "It started out so innocently. We'd be in the common room -- most of us studying because it was a TUESDAY -- and then Sirius would turn to James or James would turn to Sirius and the magic words -- "I'm bored" -- would come out of their mouths. Remus sometimes would try to quickly find something constructive for them to do but invariably, it all ended at 4 in the morning wondering what the hell happened and why there was a cockatoo pecking my ear lobe."

Dora laughed. "To hear Remus tell it, he had absolutely no control over them and whoever gave him a prefect's badge must have been high at the time."

Lily laughed. "I certainly thought so! All he did was make MY job harder." 

"I always envied you, Lily. Gryffindor seemed like so much more fun than Ravenclaw," Aurora said wistfully. "A Ravenclaw's idea of fun is taking turns solving really complicated riddles."

"Trust me. When that random party spun up on a Tuesday before exams - which it always did - I envied YOU. I have no idea how I -- really all of us -- kept from flunking out." 

"Hufflepuff wasn't much fun either," Dora said. "But we learned early on what the Gryffindor password was and just crashed their fun."

"Speaking of the Marauders, what trouble are they up to, anyway?" Lily wondered aloud.

*******************************************************************

"Up for some Quidditch?" Fred asked Regulus.

"One on one?" Regulus asked.

Fred firmly told his brain - probably not his brain come to think of it -- to shut it and replied," I was thinking we'd goad Sirius and James into a game."

"Goad us into what?" Sirius asked.

"Two on two?" Fred pointed at the pitch. 

"Hell yeah!" James roared.

Sirius conjured brooms and the four soared into the sky. 

"Wait for me," Dora yelled grabbing a broom and soaring to catch them. 

Fleamont was right behind her quickly followed by several other wizards from different houses and different eras until there were enough players to field two complete teams. 

Lily held out her hand to Aurora. "Come on. You're obligated to cheer for them, you know, or you'll never hear the end of it. It's also less painful if you pretend to understand what the hell they're doing." 

"I actually love watching quidditch," Aurora said. "I just don't love...heights," she murmured as Lily led her to the top of the quidditch stands. 

Lily sat down next to Remus. "Spouses section?" 

Remus laughed. "Dora does kind of wear the quidditch uniform in the family." 

Euphemia followed them and sat down beside Aurora. "I always wished they'd let the parents come and watch. I hardly ever saw the boys play outside the garden."

Dumbledore and Snape also joined the group. "Do you mind if we sit?" Dumbledore asked. 

Lily regarded him for a long moment. He saved Harry but there was still Azkaban...though those scars had faded. She glanced at Aurora and Euphemia. Okay?

They nodded. 

"Have a seat," Lily said. 

"I say, it's quite a thing to see all the houses mixed together like this. Makes me think that maybe Voldemort was right to burn that Sorting Hat," Dumbledore said. 

"Let us not be hasty, Albus," Snape said. "A quidditch pitch is hardly the same as mixing for seven years of school."

"I think Albus is right," Aurora said thoughtfully. "It's rare that anyone has only the traits of one house. Most have traits of all the houses but by putting them in a single house, those traits become dominate and they perhaps lose the other traits entirely. Would it be such a bad thing if someone with Slytherin ambition also had the Gryffindor courage to stand up when he believed things had gone too far? How many more would have resisted Voldemort had they not been isolated in Slytherin?"

"Or if a Gryffindor actually had the Ravenclaw ability to think something through before acting on it," Lily said, pointing at James who had just charged into what was clearly a trap and was now struggling to get back on his broom.

They laughed and settled back to watch the match cheering for both sides. 

****************************************************************************************************************

Sirius handed his broom off to the next batch of players and walked quickly to catch up with Dumbledore. 

"Good match," Dumbledore said collegially. "Any idea who won?"

None," Sirius said. "I'm not even sure which side I was playing for after a certain point." 

They walked in silence for a moment. Sirius put his hand on Dumbledore's arm, stopping him.

"I just want to say thank you for finding a way to save Harry," Sirius said. "He'll have a chance at a real life now instead of...."

"An eternity of torture?" Dumbledore said quietly. "I too was concerned. I think though it's not so black and white. Factors are considered. Look at Regulus. His act of heroism was sufficient to counteract anything he may have done previously."

"Maybe," Sirius said. "I'm just glad we didn't have to put that theory to the test."

Sirius turned to go but Dumbledore touched his arm and he turned back.

"I am truly sorry, Sirius. About many things but most notably, about your stay in Azkaban. I allowed expediency to rule over decency and it's not something I'm proud of. I know it doesn't change anything. Doesn't take away the horror of 12 years with dementors. Doesn't give you your life back but...."

"Maybe my life was always supposed to be here, Albus. Maybe everything happened the way it had to," Sirius said. 

"Maybe," Dumbledore said softly.

********************************************************************************************************

Remus, Dora, James, Lily, Sirius and Aurora sat around a campfire on the courtyard somewhat isolated from the festivities. 

"So what now?" Remus asked. "What have you been doing all this time"

"Seeing the world..." Lily said.

"Discovering new magic..." Aurora mused.

"Causing the occasional..." Sirius began.

"...international incident," James completed.

Dora laughed. "So you have room for two more?"

Remus bent down and kissed her once again pink hair. He'd seen it turn during the quidditch match but hadn't mentioned it. No need for sadness tonight. He had her and he had his best mates and they all had forever.

*********************************************************************************************************

The festivities continued to roar but Fred felt a bit quiet as he sat by the lake staring at the moonlight as it lit up the water. Thinking of George. His family. Their celebrations would be tinged with sadness tonight. 

Regulus sat down beside Fred and handed him a flask filled with firewhiskey. 

Fred took a swig and handed it back. "Cheers."

They sat in silence for a minute. "You can talk about them if you want. I'll listen," Regulus offered, staring at the water. 

Fred hesitated for a moment and said, "I was just thinking that while we're celebrating, while everyone's celebrating, they're planning a funeral. My funeral."

Regulus let him talk.

"And they're sad and I'm...well I'm not thrilled about dying but I'm not...sad. I miss them and George...I think I'll always feel like some really important limb like my leg is gone but...I'm not sad."

"And you feel kind of shitty about it," Regulus guessed.

"Pretty much," Fred said. "I don't even know if I'd go back if I could," he admitted. "There's something about this place." The man sitting next to you? Shut it.

"I wouldn't go back," Regulus said. "There I'm either a Death Eater or a Traitor but here, I have my brother back and..." he looked at Fred. "...I made a friend which...pathetic as this may sound is sort of a first for me."

Fred looked surprised by Regulus' statement. 

"I get it if you don't want to be friends," Regulus said quickly, second guessing himself. "You know what I am. What I did. Or maybe you don't but you should. I was no different than the Death Eaters you've fought. I've tortured and killed innocent people. So I get why you wouldn't want to be friends...."

Fred realized Regulus was waiting to be rejected and it crushed him a little bit. He turned to face Regulus. "Whoa. Stop. We are friends. I know or could guess what you did before but I don't believe it's who you really are. I was just a little surprised that...well...I'm honored to be your first." Would be happy to be your first in other ways....

"Oh. Yeah I did preface that with pathetic." Regulus smiled a bit at Fred, his face a foot away from Fred's. 

Fred stared at Regulus, his heart beating way too fast, insane thoughts swirling through his head though were they insane? He thought maybe Regulus was gay or was that just wishful thinking? No, he was somewhat sure. Somewhat sure is not sure though. What was the worst that could happen? Getting punched? No longer having him as a friend? What's the best that could happen? He leaned over and kissed Regulus on the mouth throwing his pros and cons list out the window. Regulus stayed perfectly still at first but then Fred felt Regulus kissing him back. When Fred finally pulled away for some air, Regulus was staring at him wide eyed and then he was gone. Vanished into thin air. 

"Or that could happen," Fred muttered in frustration laying down and banging his head against the earth. "You bleeding idiot."


	35. Monster

Fred lay by the lake hating himself for a couple hours and then apparated back to the Potters. He didn't have it in him to engage in drunken debauchery with the Marauders when all he could think was what did I do? What kind of person does that to someone who just confessed that they'd never had a friend before? I'm a monster. But that kiss.... 

Alas, the drunken debauchery meant that Fred had the entire next day to himself to obsess over Regulus as no one else managed to get out of bed at all. 

********************************

Day 2 of my life as a monster, Fred thought as he walked into the kitchen for breakfast and didn't see Regulus there. Had anyone else noticed his absence?

"...was thinking we might go out tonight," James was saying to Sirius. "Have you seen Claws?"

"Claws?" Remus asked.

"We helped Reg become an animagus a few months ago and he turned into a bloody lion," James explained. "Fucking impressive."

Well, that would have been worse than disappearing, Fred thought. Mauled to death by a lion. Can I die here? Actually, maybe mauled to death by a lion would have been better. 

"I haven't seen him," Sirius said. "Maybe shacking up with some girl from the party?"

Fred almost laughed at the irony. 

"I didn't really see him at the party," Aurora said. 

"I'm sure he'll turn up. He wouldn't leave his playmates to fend for themselves," Lily snarked.

**********************************************************************************************

Remus was sitting in the garden enjoying the spring sunshine when James joined him.

"Moony," James said handing him a butter beer. "Hair of the dog."

"I don't think it was that dog," Remus laughed. "I'm pretty sure I was drunk for the first 48 hours of my death."

"Death to firewhiskey," James moaned. "Speaking of drinking...." he began unsure that he should ask. "The other night..." If you're going to ask just spit it out. "When Sirius first got here, he was an absolute mess. I was pretty pissed at you actually for not taking better care of him. You know how he is."

Remus started to object.

"I'm not pissed anymore. Sirius told me that I wasn't allowed to be mad at you even though the fact that you believed he'd betray me to Voldemort is...." 

"You both believed that I would betray you to Voldemort, James," Remus pointed out. "I believed what everyone believed about Sirius as much as it killed me to even think about it."

James sighed. "Sorry. Not the point. "

"So there is a point coming?" Remus asked trying not to feel defensive.

"I got him to talk about finding our bodies and Azkaban," James said.

Remus looked surprised. "I didn't. Failed on both counts."

"Well, he wasn't happy about it but he was outnumbered. The part he didn't really talk about was the year at Grimmauld Place. What little he did say sounded bad. It sounded like he wasn't...well."

"He was okay sometimes."

"And other times?"

"Less okay. Much less okay. Forcing him to stay there with whatever Azkaban did to him...it was a bad combination, but he seems much better now."

"He is," James agreed. "Which is why I haven't pressed him. Because he is okay...for the most part and whenever he has little...episodes...Aurora sort of fixes him."

"Dora mentioned that she did that to her as well," Remus said. "Odd bit of magic. You're concerned if something really bad happens, he won't be able to deal with it?"

"I don't know. I just...he was so broken when he came here," James said quietly. "I can't see him like that again, Remus."

"I remember," Remus said quietly. "He was okay for the most part when there were people around so I tried to be there as much as possible but we were at war. I had things I had to do...."

"So while you were off on missions, he was trapped in a home he associates with hatred and abuse with dementors in his head and feeling like a useless coward?"

"A fair summary, I'm afraid," Remus said and took a long drink of butter beer. "Though I don't know what the alternative would have been. He was #1 on the Ministry's most wanted list. It was everything Kingsley could do to keep them following false leads."

"I don't know. Maybe someone could have tried to clear his name?" James growled. "Actually given him a trial, used verita serum, priori incantatum.... You know, due process?"

"Is that why your father won't allow Dumbledore in the house?" Remus asked. 

"It is certainly the number one reason though there are others," James said. "We were all angry about it but he hasn't quite found it in himself to forgive yet. I guess I haven't quite either."

"Should I expect my invitation revoked as well?" Remus asked. "I also did nothing to help Sirius, to clear his name."

"You weren't former chief warlock of the Wisengamot. What could you have done?" James asked. "And Sirius insists that Grimmauld Place would have been worse without you so I think your invitation to stay here is safe. What did you do while he was in Azkaban?"

"Tried to survive," Remus said quietly. "Though there were days when I wasn't sure why. As to Sirius and Azkaban, you can blame me if you want. I could have done something. Tried to prove his innocence. Tried to convince Dumbledore."

"Dumbledore already knew he was innocent," James said.

Remus sat stunned for a moment. "I'm sure that he didn't."

"He told us that he 'had his doubts' that Sirius was guilty but it furthered his plans for Harry to 'let Barty Crouch do what he wanted'," James said in a voice tinged with anger.

Remus tried to digest this information, tried to find a reason to prove it wasn't true, that the man who had risked everything so that Remus could attend Hogwarts wasn't the same man who let his best friend, his brother, rot in Azakaban for 12 years. "I guess that explains why he was so willing to believe me and the kids after what happened with Peter in the Shrieking Shack though...."

"You don't want to believe it," James said. "I get that though...the truth is that Sirius and I didn't tell Dumbledore we'd switched secret keepers because we'd sort of lost faith, lost trust in him. It felt like he was playing a game that we weren't privy to and there was too much on the line, you know?"

"I didn't know. I guess I feel better that I wasn't the only person you suddenly stopped trusting," Remus said quietly.

"I wish I would have...trusted you, Dumbledore. Had I just told someone that we switched...."

"Plenty of blame to go around, James," Remus said. "No need to hoard it all. For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure Sirius is holding on to more than his fair share of blame as well. Apparently, he suggested Peter."

"But we all agreed," James said. "And what happened to him...Lily and I were the lucky ones."

"Lucky about what?" Sirius asked joining them in the garden. 

"Lucky in love, Pads," James said.

"Oh yes that. The great love affair of the ages," Sirius said. "Remember when poor Harry was convinced that Lily hated James?" he asked Remus.

Remus laughed. 

"What'? How could he be convinced of such a ridiculous thing?" James asked. 

"Apparently, he was snooping around Snape's pensieve. Snape had been trying to teach him occlumency, remember? So Snivellus must have been emptying his head of any embarrassing memories just in case. Anyway, Harry found a memory of you hexing Snape and Lily being all annoyed about it."

"He was quite upset," Remus remembered. "Even snuck into Umbridge's office to use the flue to confront us about it."

"What did you tell him?" James asked. 

"That we were kids. 15," Sirius said. "Of course, he was 15 at the time so he wasn't that impressed with the excuse."

"So my son thinks I'm what? A bully?" James said.

"No," Sirius said. "He loves you."

"He doesn't even know me," James said quietly his heart breaking.

"We told him about you, about both of you," Sirius said. "He knows you."

Remus was quiet wondering who would help Teddy know him. The people who knew him best were sitting in front of him.

"There's no one left in that world who really knows me," James realized. "Not even my son. Not really."

Sirius put his arm around James comforting him. "Harry does know you. He loves you. You saw him with the resurrection stone."

"I never thought my entire existence would be boiled down to 15 minutes of an enemy's memory."

"We straightened him out, James," Sirius assured him. 

"Well, straightened Harry out anyway. Snape refused to teach him occlumency ever again," Remus said. "Which had a significant consequence."

"I hate that he blames himself for my death," Sirius said. "Not the least because death is actually quite an improvement over what my life had become."

"About that..." James began. "...if you ever need to talk about that place...."

"That place is in the past," Sirius assured him. 

*************************************************************

On day 3 of Fred's new life as a monster, he decided to spend the day walking in the woods in a thinly veiled attempt to avoid everyone. He lasted 15 entire minutes before he realized that walking was boring and returned to the house via the garden. 

"It's just a bit odd that he's been gone for 3 days with no word," Sirius said to James and Remus. 

"I'm sure you're right. He's just shagging some girl he met at the party," James said. 

Remus looked a bit more skeptical. Regulus had never struck him as that sort of person. Sirius gone for 3 days, yes probably an adventure of a sexual nature, but something about this excuse and Regulus didn't add up to him though he couldn't quite put his finger on why.

"Fred!" Sirius called seeing Fred at the far side of the garden. "Why don't you join us?"

Fred reluctantly trudged over and then repositioned his face to look like he was happy to see them instead of guilt ridden. 

"Fred, come sit with us. Tell us more about our genius," James encouraged.

"Please don't," Remus begged. "You don't understand what it took to deflate his ego to even fit him in our dorm room."

"True story. Had to do an enlargement charm on the door," Sirius agreed.

"So how are you doing with all this, Fred? I know it must have been quite a shock. Just being ripped apart like that," Remus said.

For a moment, Fred thought Remus was talking about Regulus and his face turned several different colors. He then realized he meant dying and being separated from George. One more thing to be guilty about...obsessing over Regulus had given him little time to obsess over his twin brother. "It's a bit odd without him," Fred admitted. I've turned into a monster without him. Kissing men who don't want to be kissed. Even though they kissed me back. "We'd never really been apart at all before. "

"I wish I could say it gets easier, but I never really got to that point," Sirius said.

"When Regulus died?" Fred asked.

Sirius looked surprised and then guilty. "Yes...well...that had...other complications. I was speaking of James actually."

"Of course," Fred said. James which he should have known because he'd heard Sirius say that he missed James every day. Only he, Fred, couldn't get his mind off Regulus. He felt horrible for Regulus for a moment. Did anyone mourn him when he died? "But you were sad when Regulus died?" he blurted out. Why did you ask that?

"Yes. Well more angry than sad. Angry that he got himself into a situation that would get him killed but I guess I'd really already mourned him when he got that mark on his arm," Sirius explained. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, he's your brother and...never mind..." Fred said realizing the truth. James was to Sirius what George was to him. And Regulus...Regulus was just some poor sod whose friends consisted of a grouchy house elf and a bloke who kissed him against his will. Then why'd he kiss me back?

************  
Dora sat in the garden by herself. It had been a particularly rough day. Teddy's two month birthday. Her brain understood that she would never see another of his birthdays but her heart...her heart wouldn't stop breaking. If she could just hold him one more time... She heard someone join her and turned to see Aurora. She tried to smile but just didn't have it in her.

Aurora sat down beside Dora and took her hand. She had been having an internal argument since the night she found Dora sobbing and now she was sure it was the right thing. She could never say goodbye to Luna but Dora and Remus could say goodbye to Teddy. He would be too young to remember anyway. "Sirius could allow you to say goodbye to him. If that would help."

Dora looked at her with surprise.

"He could lift the veil. You wouldn't be able to touch him. Sirius tried to touch Harry and couldn't...but you could see him one last time and say goodbye. He won't remember but..."

"I would," Dora said tears in her eyes. "Yes please."

Aurora touched her wrist. "He's on his way and is bringing Remus."

Dora looked at her questioningly. "I'd been wondering about the tattoos."

"Druid magic," Aurora said. "They connect us."

Sirius and Remus joined them. "What's going on?" Sirius asked sitting beside his wife.

"They need to say goodbye," Aurora said. 

Sirius nodded. "Let's go then. To Andromeda's, I assume?"

They apparated to Andromeda's and Dora led them to the nursery. 

Sirius raised the veil. 

"You won't have as long as at the battle," Aurora said. 

Dora was already staring at her infant son in his cot, tears rolling down her face. "We love you so much, Teddy, but mummy and daddy can't stay here with you no matter how much we want to. But Nana will always be here for you."

"Harry and the Weasleys too," Remus said, his eyes wet. "They'll all look after you and love you. Your mum and I will always love you too but from a very long way away. We're so sorry we had to leave you but we hope that once you're older you'll understand why we had to go."

"We'll need to leave soon," Aurora said seeing Sirius' pale face. 

"We love you so much, Teddy," Dora said. "Take care of your nana and have a good life."

"We love you, son," Remus said.

Sirius dropped the veil. None of them had noticed Andromeda sitting in the rocking chair with tears rolling down her cheeks. 

**************************************************************************  
On Fred's 4th day as a monster, he walked into the kitchen to some increasingly crazy theories.

"But we don't KNOW what those emus were capable of, James! What if he came back here after the party and they attacked him? I've heard that emus can be very territorial when they're in heat," Sirius said with real concern.

"I'm not sure that includes emus who started their lives as tomatoes," Remus said always the voice of reason.

James considered this. "I don't know about emus but it has been 4 days now and I'm starting to get worried too. There are all kinds of things that could have gotten him. What if he tried to change into a lion and something went wrong? He could have been attacked by another lion."

"There are no lions in England other than Regulus," Remus said growing exhausted.

"There are other things in England though. Hippogriffs, dragons, centaurs, acromantulas, giants..." Sirius listed. 

Fred stared at his pancakes sure that he'd vomit them back up if he had a single bite. 

**************************************

On day 5, Fred felt certain that he'd earned his Monsters Club Card. 

"He's been gone for 5 days," Sirius said quietly, truly scared now. "He vanished right after Voldemort died. What if they're related? What if Voldemort somehow forced Regulus to go to him?" 

James and Remus looked worried. 

"Let's just look at the evidence before we jump to any conclusions," Dora said.

"That seems wise," Lily agreed. 

"When was the last time anyone saw him?" Aurora asked. 

"On the Quidditch pitch, I think," James said. "I don't remember seeing him after but..."

"That entire night is fuzzy. Quidditch is the last clear memory I have," Sirius admitted. "Remus?"

Remus shook his head. "I maybe saw him afterward." He tried to pull the memory out of his firewhiskey impaired brain. "Maybe by one of the firewhiskey fountains. I think he was filling a flask. I don't know. I don't even know when it was."

"Was he with anyone?" Dora asked.

Remus shook his head. "Not that I saw but really I could barely see."

"This is really a poor time to lose your werewolf tolerance," Sirius said. "Fred, did you see my brother? Weren't you talking to him earlier?"

"I...I..." Fred stuttered remembering the lake, the flask, Regulus, the kiss. He knew he should just come clean but couldn't quite find the words to do it. "I don't remember seeing him after the quidditch match. I'm sorry." 

"Okay so we've ruled out that he just left voluntarily and is shacked up somewhere?" Dora said.

"It's been 5 days," James said. "And it doesn't seem like something he would do."

"Does he have any friends that he might be staying with?" Dora continued the interrogation.

Only monsters thought Fred.

Sirius shook his head. "Any friends he had aren't here and he hasn't been away from us to make any new ones."

"I'm not sure he would anyway," James said. "Death Eater, surname of Black, he's going to be about as popular here as you are, Pads."

Remus sat with his eyes closed for a long time. He finally opened them and looked around. "I saw him much later than the quidditch match. It was dark. Everyone was drunk."

"How did he seem?" Dora asked. "Was he upset about anything?"

"No not upset. I think he felt a little out of place. He seemed alone to me. Not just that he was alone when I saw him but just seemed...alone," Remus said.

Fred despised himself. Regulus was alone and sought him out and he responded by basically suggesting that friendship was conditional. Yes, he kissed me back but does that even matter now? 

"Could he have just left?" Dora asked. "Maybe it was just too much being the proverbial fish out of water."

"Maybe months ago but things were better," Sirius insisted. "He was finally starting to be okay. To accept this place as his home. He wouldn't just leave."

"This IS his home," Euphemia said. "He knows that. He wouldn't just leave without saying anything. He wouldn't just leave at all." 

"I agree," James said. "He'd even been fairly tolerant of me lately which was a huge improvement."

"Huge improvement," Sirius agreed. "Something happened. Either someone did something or said something to make him leave or something...something bad happened to him," he finished quietly. 

Perhaps both, Fred thought miserably. 

"Voldemort couldn't just summon him though, right?" Dora said. "That's not how the dark marks work. They have to be touched."

"In the before world maybe but here?" Fleamont said. "There are a lot of unknowns about this place."

"Not today perhaps but maybe we should start cataloging some of those unknowns," Aurora suggested. "Most notably, what is the relationship between this dimension and the other place? The place where Voldemort would be."

"First, we need to find my brother," Sirius said clearly worried. 

"We'll find him," Dora assured him. 

"We will," Fleamont agreed. "Dora, I was thinking it might be helpful to compile an incident report like we would normally. Just to see what we know in one place."

Dora agreed and the two of them left.

"He wouldn't just leave," Sirius said quietly. 

Euphemia put her arm around him. "We'll find him. No matter what happened. He's a part of this family and we won't stop looking until we find him."

*********************************************************

Those who weren't monsters spent day 6 asking around Diagon Alley, checking out Grimmauld Place, Hogwarts, and anywhere else they could easily think of all to no avail. 

"You can't think of anywhere else, Sirius? Places where you spent holidays? Friends' houses? Even if those friends aren't here...." Fleamont asked for the third time.

Sirius shook his head. "We didn't really go on holiday. We had that country house when we were really little but I don't think Reg was even old enough to remember it. As far as friends' houses...maybe the Malfoys or our cousins' house? But why would he go there if the houses are empty?"

Dora sighed. Because we're out of ideas, she thought. "We just want to exhaust all the possibilities." 

"What about the possibility that Voldemort is punishing him for stealing the horcrux?" Sirius asked voicing his deepest fear. 

Fred winced at the absolute terror in Sirius' eyes. He should tell the truth but couldn't seem to open his mouth. He'd never felt less like a Gryffindor in his life. 

"We'll cover the Malfoys tomorrow and also..." Fleamont sighed. "We'll find Dumbledore and see if he knows anything about the relationship between the worlds."

"If anyone understands it, it'll be him," Remus agreed. 

"The rest of us will break up into groups and spread out. Look for clues. Maybe someone who attended the party saw something," Dora said. 

***************************************

Fred realized that if Regulus didn't show up by the next morning he was going to have to out himself to some very confused people -- not just out himself but explain how his actions had been so disturbing as to lead to one Regulus Black completely fleeing the scene never to return. And yet somehow he couldn't quite bring himself to regret the kiss. Reg HAD kissed him back. He knew that, felt that. You know when a bloke is kissing you back. He hadn't imagined it. Had he? These thoughts swirled in his mind like a tempest as he tried to sleep that night. So loud were they that he didn't hear his door open and was quite surprised when someone crawled into bed with him. 

"Kiss me again," Regulus said.

"Reg, you're back! I'm so..." Fred began, feeling six days of stress, of missing him melt away.

"Kiss me again, Fred," Regulus demanded in a somewhat haughty tone that Fred guessed was reserved for house elves and other underlings. "Now."

"Please don't disappear this time," Fred said as he leaned over and kissed Regulus. He was absolutely sure he was being kissed back this time. Lips, tongues meeting. He felt Regulus' hands on his chest and then around his waist, pulling him closer, still kissing him. He felt Regulus get hard through his clothes. Regulus was still fully clothed. Fred realized that he was not at all clothed and thought he had the better way of it. When Regulus finally pulled away, Fred was breathless. 

"So..." Regulus gasped for breath. "That definitely happened. So...I...left before...."

"Yeah I noticed. Your brother's mounting some sort of insane search party in the morning if you'd care to stop him. He's totally...."

Regulus put his fingers on Fred's mouth. "I need you to not talk about my brother right now."

"Got it," Fred agreed. "Is there something else you wanted to talk about?"

"Um. Yeah," Regulus said suddenly a bit shy. "So I left before...I didn't know...."

Fred looked at him questioningly. "You didn't know what?"

"I didn't know that...I wanted to kiss you," Regulus said softly.

"So you do want to kiss me?" 

"That wasn't obvious?"

"It's good to be clear about these things. Misunderstandings can happen. People can vanish for 6 bloody days," Fred said. 

"I just needed to figure some things out," Regulus said.

"And you're all straight now?" Fred said.

"Clearly not," Regulus smirked. 

Fred laughed. "Clearly not."

"So I...um...what happens now?" Regulus asked.

"Whatever you want to happen," Fred said. "Kissing is good. Other things...."

"I'm not really clear on the other things," Regulus admitted. "I mean the limitations of anatomy would lead one to believe...." He realized he was rambling and stopped. 

Fred gently touched Regulus' perfect face. "You're really beautiful," he murmured. 

Regulus leaned over and kissed Fred a bit experimentally. Fred kissed him back, twining his fingers in Regulus' long black hair that felt like spun silk. 

"So what now?" Regulus murmured against Fred's mouth. 

"Well, you may notice that one of us is naked and one of us isn't. You could remedy that if you wanted?" Fred asked hopefully. 

Regulus considered this request and got out of bed. 

Fred looked ready to protest until Regulus took his shirt off revealing smooth muscles. 

Regulus unbuttoned his trousers and then paused looking a little embarrassed. He took a deep breath and stripped off the rest of his clothes standing naked in the moonlight streaming in through the window. 

Fred stared with his mouth slightly agape. Good Godric was that drool? Get it together. He lifted up the covers and got out of bed standing naked in front of Regulus. He put his hand on Regulus' chest over his heart and was surprised to find that the other man was near to full cardiac arrest. He moved closer still, feeling Regulus' rock hard body against his own. Regulus gasped as bare skin made contact with bare skin. Fred kissed him deeply, felt Regulus tentatively run his hands up his chest, down his back, lower, until the world was nothing but hands and tongues and lips exploring bare skin. They rubbed against each other desperation and instinct taking over. 

Fred pushed Regulus down on the bed and climbed on top of him, kissing, rubbing, thrusting against him until they both came. Fred collapsed on top of Regulus. 

Regulus tried to catch his breath but that seemed impossible. Sex had really not felt like that before. That...hot. He wrapped his legs around Fred's pulling him closer, stroking his long muscular back. "So...I may be gay."

Fred laughed into Regulus' hair. "You think?"

Regulus laughed. "Yeah, pretty sure." 

Fred rolled over pulling Regulus with him. Regulus tentatively laid his head on Fred's chest. "Am I the girl?"

"Do you want to be?"

"I don't know. This is nice." Regulus swirled his fingers around Fred's chest hairs wondering how to phrase the next question. "So...um...that was brilliant but...."

"There's other stuff. If you want to." Fred stroked Regulus' hair gently. "I'm not too interested in you disapparating again though so no pressure."

"I think maybe...." Regulus said cautiously. "Does it hurt?"

"It feels a bit odd at first and then pretty amazing," Fred assured him. 

Regulus crawled on top of Fred and kissed him deeply, felt him growing hard again. "Let's try that."

Fred murmured a few words against Regulus' lips. Regulus looked at him, unnerved by the strange liquifying sensation. "Trust me," Fred said. He rolled Regulus over on his back and gently entered him. 

Regulus looked unsure for a moment as Fred thrust in and out of him as gently as possible, his hand rubbing Regulus' cock. "Yeah, it feels...oh...." Regulus moaned. "...oh...yes....".

Fred thrusted harder, his hand matching his thrust. 

"Oh...oh...oh..." Regulus moaned out of his mind, getting louder, pushing against Fred, wanting more.

Fred tried desperately to remember how to create a cone of silence around them and hoped to hell he got it right as they both came moaning loudly. 

"Good godric you're a fast learner," Fred gasped between breaths. 

"Have...a...good..teacher," Regulus gasped. "Can't move."

"Oh sorry," Fred rolled off. 

"You weren't the problem. Can't move my limbs. At all."

Fred laughed. "Yeah, that happens." He rolled Regulus over and put Regulus' head on his chest again. He then put Regulus arm over his chest and snuggled. 

"Thank you," Regulus said, his breathing slowly returning to normal. 

"You're like my puppet." Fred flung Regulus' limp arm around.

"Very funny. You know, eventually it will work again and you'll be sorry." 

"I can't wait," Fred said mischievously. "I've been a very naughty boy." 

Regulus laughed. 

"You have a really nice laugh. You should do it more. I think I"ll make you do it more," Fred decided. "Still paralyzed?"

"My fingers are tingly," Regulus reported. 

"You'll recover then. Eventually." 

They lay together quietly for a moment. 

"I don't think I"m ready to explain this to...anyone...yet," Regulus said softly. 

"I'm fine with that. I'm not quite sure I'm ready to take out an ad in the Daily Prophet myself." 

Fred put his arms around Regulus, felt himself drifting off to sleep. He listened to Regulus' slow even breathing and realized he wasn't the only one.


	36. Secret Keepers

Regulus bolted upright utterly confused. By the sun. By that pounding noise. By his nakedness. By the strange room. Fred. The whole night flew back into his memory and he smiled slightly.. 

Fred slowly sat up. Smiled at Regulus who was looking a bit befuddled. He's cute when he's befuddled. What's that bloody pounding?

"Fred! Get up! We're leaving NOW!" Sirius bellowed from behind the closed door. 

"Oh bloody...fuck," Fred murmured. "Hold on a second. I'll be right down."

Regulus looked at him in utter panic. 

"Out the window," Fred hissed.

Regulus leapt up...gracefully thought Fred realizing he'd be needing a cold shower before he could deal with the Marauders. He could hear James joining Sirius outside his door. "Clothes," hissed Fred. 

Regulus grabbed his clothes and still bloody gracefully leapt out the window to the grass below just as the door flung open. 

"Good Godric! Can't a man have some privacy??" Fred demanded hoping Sirius didn't notice the black hair flying out the window as he opened the door.

"Not when that man is 30 minutes late to a search party, he can't," Sirius said. "Up!"

"I'm up! I"m up!" Fred jumped out of bed, dragging the blanket with him to cover his nakedness among other problems that Regulus had caused before throwing himself out the bedroom window. He spied Regulus' pants on the floor and discreetly kicked them under the bed. "Can I at least have 5 minutes to get dressed with some modicum of dignity? I swear, you're worse than sharing a bathroom with Ron!"

"5 minutes," James agreed pulling Sirius down the stairs. 

***********************************************************************

Fred sauntered as nonchalantly as he could manage down the stairs at the same time Regulus came in through the front door. Fred tripped down the last two steps. 

Regulus smirked at Fred and then turned to face the music.

"Regulus! Thank Godric!" Sirius exclaimed hugging his brother tightly. "We thought you'd been mauled by wild doxies." 

"We didn't think that," Remus said. "Just you thought that." 

"Where the hell have you been?" James asked hugging a surprised Regulus. "Sirius is completely off his trolley. We were about to tranquilize him."

Regulus couldn't help but look a little touched that Sirius had not only noticed he was gone but was upset about it. Still he needed a believable excuse for his sabbatical and 'figuring out I'm a flaming poufter' wasn't it. "I...I just needed some time to..." His arm caught his eye. The mark was completely gone, just a scar remained. "...come to terms with this..." He showed Sirius his arm. "...being gone, I guess. I didn't mean to worry you. Just needed to...take stock." 

Fred marveled at what a horrible liar Regulus was. You'd think being a Death Eater, he would be better at it. He loved that he wasn't better at it. He loved the blush in his cheeks that he had no control over. He loved...okay this needed to stop because running over there and snogging the hell out of Regulus wasn't going to keep their secret at all. But those lips... 

"Why didn't you just tell us?" Sirius asked. "I get it. I was just worried about you."

"That hadn't actually occurred to me," Regulus spoke truthfully for the first time since he came in the door. "That it would worry you." 

"You're my brother. Of course, it worried me. James' categorization of 'off my trolley' is only mildly exaggerated and what with Voldemort being dead now and you vanished right after...."

"I'm sorry," Regulus said sincerely. "I hadn't thought of that. It won't happen again. I promise. I'm not going anywhere." He allowed himself a microscopic glance at Fred who was staring at him with...lust or some other equally inappropriate emotion to be feeling toward a platonic friend. He loved it though if anyone else saw it not even a fidelius charm was going to keep them secret. He looked pointedly at Fred who rearranged his face to a more appropriate position. Was Remus looking? Or was he being paranoid? That guy had always creeped him out a little. Like he saw things that no one else did with his wolf sense or something.

"Just leave a note next time, okay, Claws?" James asked. "We were really worried."

Regulus nodded. 

"So now that you're back, can we PLEASE go outside and play tonight?" James begged.

"You could have just gone without me," Regulus pointed out.

"Nah. We couldn't have," James said. "It wouldn't have been the same."

Sirius nodded in agreement.

Regulus smiled a bit at the thought that he was a necessary part of this odd family and while he would have preferred to spend tonight with Fred.... "Yeah we can go out and play tonight." 

****************************

Fred sat in a discreet area of the garden considering how stupid he was to feel a bit jealous that Regulus chose James and Sirius over him. Fairly stupid, he thought, but clearly this thing with Regulus was twisting his brain and his stomach into knots so stupid yes but unavoidable probably also yes. 

"There you are," Regulus said quietly sitting down next to Fred.

"Here I am," Fred said. "Were you looking for me?" He wondered if there would ever be a time when Regulus' voice didn't make his heart rate accelerate. 

"I was actually," Regulus said.

"Well, you found me. What did you want?" Fred asked a bit more coldly than intended. 

"A couple things," Regulus murmured. He looked around to ensure that they were alone and kissed Fred. 

Fred found that he immediately felt better and kissed Regulus back. 

"Also about tonight..." Regulus began.

"No big deal," Fred said.

"Oh," Regulus said a bit more hurt than he'd intended. 

They sat in silence for a moment. 

"It is a big deal," Regulus said.

"I want to see you tonight," Fred said at the same time.

They laughed awkwardly. 

"I need you to understand why I agreed to go with them," Regulus said.

"Keeping us secret. I get it," Fred said.

"Well, yes, but more than that...." Regulus said. He thought about how to explain that he hadn't really understood that they considered him family until this morning without sounding pathetic. "They're my family and I worried them and I didn't know that I would. Worry them, that is."

Fred realized what Regulus wasn't saying then and discreetly took his hand. "You should go. They were really worried about you. All of them."

"Will you wait up for me?" Regulus asked a bit shyly. 

Fred smiled. "Of course. I quite like you crawling into my bed in the middle of the night."

Regulus leaned over to kiss Fred.

"There you are!" James said.

Fred quickly let go of Regulus' hand as Regulus straightened up.

"I've been looking everywhere for you," James said.

"Me?" Regulus asked.

"Well, both of you actually. Up for some quidditch?" 

"Definitely," Fred responded wondering what James had seen though he seemed his normal oblivious self. 

"Let's do it," Regulus said, standing and following James. 

************************************

"You found them!" Sirius stated the obvious as James, Fred, and Regulus walked toward the pitch in the backyard.

"In the garden," Regulus said. "I promise to leave a detailed note if I leave the property."

"We were really worried, Reg," Sirius said. 

"I know," Regulus said. "Too soon for jokes."

"Too soon," Sirius agreed 

"So who else is playing?" Fred said.

"Me, of course and Fleamont," said Dora already putting on quidditch gear. "And I've convinced Remus, Aurora, and Lily to at least try."

"The word 'convinced' suggests that there was another option," Remus said. 

Aurora laughed.

"I didn't hear another option," Lily said.

"I don't understand what you're saying," Dora said. "I wanted you to play and you're playing. I convinced you."

"You really never stood a chance," James said to Remus. "You may as well have just given in and married her to begin with."

Remus laughed. "Yes, I see that now."

"So pick teams?" Fred suggested.

"Fred and I should be captains," Sirius stated.

"Um...why?" James asked.

"Because bludgers are dangerous and must be handled properly obviously," Fred stated. "And we're the only two beaters."

"Unless you'd like to leave your safety up to someone else?" Sirius said.

"Fine."

"I should get to pick first," Fred said.

"Why?" Sirius asked.

"Because I've won the most recent quidditch cup, of course," Fred said. 

"That's a completely random reason," Sirius said. 

"Do you have a better one?" Fred asked.

Sirius thought for a bit.

"I pick Regulus," Fred said.

James looked offended.

Regulus smiled and joined Fred. 

"Fine. I would have picked James anyway," Sirius said. "I pick James."

"I pick Dora," Fred said.

"We pick Dad obviously," Sirius said. 

Fred turned to Regulus and Dora and whispered, "your thoughts on this?"

"Remus has a fear of heights which is why he never played," Dora volunteered. "He could probably play keeper though."

"Take Remus. Give them Aurora and Lily. They'll spend more time and effort teaching them than they're worth," Regulus said. 

"We'll take Remus. You can have the rest," Fred said.

"The rest?" Lily said offended. "What does that mean?" 

"We'll spot you a player," Regulus said to James and Sirius smirking. "In golf, it's called a handicap."

"Are you sure trash talking them is a great idea?" Fred hissed in Regulus' ear.

"It's really the least we could do. Must make it a fair fight," Regulus continued.

"You're going down, Black!" James yelled soaring into the air. 

"You'll pay for that, brother!" Sirius soared after him.

Remus laughed. "Brilliant strategy."

"Getting into their heads always worked at Hogwarts," Regulus said. "I have quidditch cups to prove it."

"You're a little diabolical," Fred said. "I like it! So, Remus, keeper okay? Not so much flying?"

Remus nodded. "I think I can manage that and I do enjoy taking those two down a peg."

"Then I think we're all on the same page," Dora said. "Ready Cuz?"

Dora and Regulus soared to the middle o f the pitch while the rest of the players took their places. 

"So we know Remus hates heights," James said to Sirius. "What about Fred and Dora?"

"Fred's a great beater with George. On his own, an unknown commodity. Dora, I'm really not sure. She doesn't appear to have any athletic ability but she did play for Hufflepuff."

"But it's Hufflepuff," James said.

"Exactly," Sirius said. 

"So this seems like a pretty easy win. Why did Reg spot us a player?" James asked. "Does he know something we don't?"

Sirius looked nervous. "I guess we'll find out."

As the match progressed, Regulus and Dora developed into a well oiled chaser twosome while James, Aurora and Lily developed into a disaster as James kept diving in front of every quaffle that came anywhere near the two women. Fred's team was up 80-40 when Aurora and Lily organized a mutiny.

"Why are we even playing if you're just going to be a quaffle hog?" Lily yelled at James.

"It's absolutely no fun playing with you!" Aurora agreed.

"Fun? Fun???? We're down 80-40!!! This is WAR!" James yelled at them.

Sirius joined them. "What the hell is going on up here?"

"We quit," Aurora said.

"Yes, we do!" Lily agreed.

Fleamont joined them. "What's wrong?"

"James is a quaffle hog!" Lily said.

"We're sick of it!" Aurora agreed.

"Everything okay over there?" Regulus yelled across the pitch. He smirked at Fred. 

"Yeah, yeah, just devising some killer strategy," Sirius insisted to Regulus. He turned to his team. "Work it out! We're getting demolished out there!"

"Okay, okay. Everyone just calm down," Fleamont said. "Lily, move to keeper. Aurora help Sirius with beater and I'll play chaser."

"Why are WE being punished when HE'S the quaffle hog?!?" Lily yelled loud enough to be heard across the pitch.

Regulus, Fred, Remus, and Dora laughed. 

"You're a bloody genius, Reg," Fred said. He found himself leaning toward Regulus to kiss him and then stopped himself. 

Regulus smiled at Fred. 

"Make James play another position," Aurora said.

"Or we quit," Lily said.

"I was most valuable player!!!" James roared.

The foursome across the pitch almost fell off their brooms laughing.

"James and Dad, switch positions," Sirius said.

James stared at Sirius with a look of total betrayal. "You can't do that!"

"I'm captain and I can," Sirius said. "Switch."

James flew angrily to the goal. 

"Interesting choice," Regulus said to his teammates. 

"You think Potter's ever played keeper?" Fred asked.

"Not even once," Remus confirmed. 

"Shall we?" Regulus turned to Dora.

"Oh we definitely shall," Dora smiled, smelling blood.

"Are you done strategizing?" Regulus asked Sirius.

Sirius looked at James hovering in front of the goal and reconsidered his decision for a moment but no, James was athletic. There was no reason he couldn't play keeper. "We're ready."

10 minutes later the score was 160-40 and James was nursing a black eye and a bloody lip. 

"We would be willing to accept your forfeit," Regulus said magnanimously. 

Fred laughed recognizing a lot of the tactics that Slytherin would normally use against him. He hadn't seen them as calculated tactics before though. "It's interesting watching this strategy play out from this side. You should realize though that while it may have worked, it took every bit of self restraint we could muster not to punch all of you in the face afterwards."

Regulus laughed. "What's a broken nose when compared to a quidditch cup? Losing wasn't an option."

"Okay so James can't play keeper. My bad," Sirius said. "Can you even see, Prongs?"

James shook his head. "I'm fine!"

"James, you're bleeding everywhere," Lily said gently. 

"I'M FINE!" James roared. 

"The problem is that they're getting to the goal. We need to stop them sooner," Aurora said. 

Sirius nodded. "Reg and Dora are too fast for one beater. Aurora and Lily, beaters. James and I will play chaser."

"Finally! A plan that isn't stupid!" James said. 

James and Sirius soared out to the middle of the pitch.

"We may have overplayed this," Regulus said. "Remus, get ready. Fred, you know what needs to be done."

Fred nodded. The true role of the beater. The enforcer. It wouldn't be the first time though it would be the first time alone.

20 minutes later, the score was 420-390 and everyone was injured. 

"Ready to call it?" Regulus asked Sirius, wiping blood from his face.

Sirius squinted at Regulus through his one good eye. "Not a chance."

"This is ridiculous," LIly said rubbing her head that had recently taken a bludger. 

"This has to end," Aurora agreed.

"Release the snitch," Fleamont suggested. 

Everyone gaped at him.

"Quidditch matches end because there's a snitch. Release the snitch," Fleamont reiterated.

"They have a seeker and we don't," James pointed out.

"You have five people and we have four," Fred pointed out.

"How hard could it be to grab a snitch?" James whispered to Sirius.

Sirius considered. "Release the snitch."

Fred exchanged a look with Regulus who nodded. 

"Release the snitch," Fred said.

Regulus saw the snitch first and dove straight down after it. 

James saw Regulus diving and followed him though the straight down motion made him feel like his breakfast was going to come up. Good Merlin, the ground was coming up! Why isn't he stopping?

Regulus pulled out of the dive a foot from the ground as the snitch broke left. 

James did not pull up in time and crash landed into a rose bush. "FUCK!"

The snitch soared and Regulus followed it. 

Sirius saw that James wasn't rejoining the chase and took off after Regulus who was chasing the snitch through the woods dodging tree branches as he went. Sirius failed to dodge a particularly large tree branch and fell off his broom.

The snitch and Regulus soared out of the woods alone. 

Aurora watched the snitch thoughtfully. Was there a pattern? If there was, it was slight. Almost entirely random. She flew to where she thought the snitch might go next and caught it neatly when it did. "Look!" she exclaimed happily holding the buzzing, fluttering gold ball. 

They all looked at her in shock. 

"I guess we win then?" Aurora asked. She smiled sweetly at Regulus and Fred. "I guess you should have taken one of the others."

Sirius soared to Aurora and pulled her off her broom onto his and kissed her. "If I wasn't already madly in love with you, that would have done it."

********************************

As they all tromped into the house after quidditch, Regulus whispered to Fred, "I think I may need a shower after that. Care to join me?"

"Hm. I could be very handy with the hard to reach spots," Fred whispered suggestively.

"I can think of one particularly hard to reach spot that I may need your help with," Regulus whispered. "Meet you up there."

A few minutes later in Regulus' room. Fred apparated in and Regulus put wards on the door. 

"Just in case anyone comes looking," Regulus said. 

"Good thinking," Fred said. They looked at each other a little shyly in the full light of day. 

"So I do really need a shower," Regulus said taking his shirt off and then his trousers revealing his nakedness, his cock hard. 

"I see that," Fred said staring with desire. 

"If you're going to help, you may be wearing too many clothes," Regulus pointed out. 

Fred stripped obediently. "Better?"

"Much," Regulus murmured his eyes taking in every inch of Fred. The shower suddenly seemed far away, the bed much closer. He grabbed Fred and threw him on the bed and laid down on top of him, kissing, touching. "I want you inside of me," he moaned as Fred kissed his neck. 

Fred happily obliged thrusting into Regulus who shifted to give him better access. Thrusting, kissing. 

"Oh yes," Regulus moaned. "More.... Touch me...."

Fred rubbed Regulus' cock as he thrust and felt Regulus shudder in orgasm. He allowed himself to let go and come too as Regulus collapsed on top of him. 

They lay on top of each other for a few minutes regaining composure. 

"I still need to shower," Regulus said finally. "Perhaps even more now."

Fred laughed. "Yeah it's getting a bit sticky, huh? Okay shower it is."

They got up and walked to the en suite bathroom. Regulus bent over to adjust the temperature of the shower. 

Fred admired the view. Thought he may never grow tired of the view. Of Regulus. 

Regulus climbed into the shower. "Coming?"

"Definitely," Fred said joining him. 

They let the hot water roll over them for a moment and then Fred reached for the shampoo. He squirted out a bit and rubbed it into Regulus' hair, kissing him. Massaged, rinsed, still kissing. He lathered soap all over Regulus' body, still kissing, Regulus moaning. He felt Regulus' soapy hands on his body and moaned in pleasure, knew he couldn't take much more of this. He turned Regulus' so that he was facing the wall of the shower. Soapy hands reaching around to wash every crevice. He entered Regulus' slowly thrusting still soaping his stomach, his chest, his cock. Hot water pouring down on them. "Is this the hard to reach place you had in mind?" Fred asked pushing deeper inside.

"Yes," Regulus moaned. "Yes...."

"How good does that feel?" Fred asked his teeth on Regulus' ear lobe. 

"So good. So fucking good...." Regulus moaned. He couldn't stand any more and touched his cock. 

Fred put his hand on Regulus' cock so they were both stroking. He thrust harder, faster. 

"Oh god yes...." Regulus moaned. "Oh Fred...." 

Fred moaned loudly as they came together. "Yes...fuck yes...."

Several minutes later, they were mostly dry and mostly dressed though were still disappointed to hear knocking at the door. 

"Reg, are you in here? Dinner's ready," Sirius announced through the door.

Regulus muttered," Exoresco" and his hair dried. He kissed Fred quickly. "See you down there." 

Fred apparated.

Regulus walked over and opened the door. 

********************************

Regulus sat at the piano bench lost in Chopin's 9th nocturne when Dora walked in, tripping on what appeared to the naked eye to be nothing but air. She tried to right herself, tried not to make a noise but crashed into a bookcase knocking several books to the ground.

Regulus looked up from the piano and then ran to help Dora up. "Are you okay? What happened?" He helped her to her feet.

"Other than being born with a complete lack of grace?"

"You're perfectly graceful on a broom," Regulus said picking up the books and returning them to the bookcase.

"Yes, the ultimate irony. Of course, it's frowned upon to fly a broom around the inside of someone's house."

Regulus laughed. "I suppose it is a bit non traditional."

"I'm sorry I disturbed you," Dora said. "I just wanted to listen. I could hear you from the hall and it was so beautiful."

"Thanks," Regulus said a little shyly. 

"Would you..." Dora gestured toward the piano.

"Of course. Is there something you wanted to hear?" Regulus asked. 

"Surprise me," Dora said. 

Regulus sat back down at the piano while Dora sat on the love seat nearby. 

Regulus played an excruciatingly sad version of Claire de La Lune that brought tears to Dora's eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"No, it's just...my dad used to play that when I was little and couldn't sleep. Not as well as you but it just reminded me of him and then lullabies and then...."

"Your son. I'm sorry. I should have played something upbeat."

"No, that was absolutely beautiful," Dora said a bit lost in reverie.

"He's not alone you know. Your son. He won't grow up alone. Andromeda was always quite nice. Even to me. Even after.... Not that I saw her more than once or twice after...." Regulus couldn't seem to stop talking. 

"After they disowned her?" Dora asked.

"Yeah," Regulus said softly. 

"Because of me," Dora stated. 

"Well, more accurately, because of your father but..."

"I don't think I could ever do that to Teddy no matter what decision he made," Dora said.

"My mother had become a bit of a master at it," Regulus said bitterly. "Andromeda and Sirius were just the latest to be burned off the family tree."

"So they just stopped talking to her?" Dora asked.

"To her. About her. Uncle Cygnus would tell random people in the street that he only had the two daughters. Sirius always thought she got the better end of the deal since disownment meant you didn't have to sit through family dinners anymore."

"I guess he got his wish then," Dora said.

"You'd think but...I think it's more complicated than that. They're still your family even though you may hate everything they stand for. That said, family dinners had become a bit dangerous for Sirius so no doubt he was better off."

"That must have been lonely after he left," Dora said. 

"It was lonely before he left," Regulus said honestly. 

"Things between you seem really good now," Dora said.

"They are much better," Regulus said. "Me not being an active Death Eater anymore seems to have made him more affectionate."

Dora cringed a bit. "It's hard to imagine you that way. You don't really fit the profile. I mean, you do. Pure blood family, Slytherin but the way you are when you play...that seems like the real you."

"Death Eaters can't be musical?" Regulus mocked her a little bit.

"You aren't just musical, Reg. It's like you pour your soul out all over the keys when you play," Dora said softly. "It doesn't feel like the soul of someone who would...."

"Torture and kill people?" Regulus supplied bitterly. He sighed. "It wasn't." He glanced at the piano. "That had been safely buried for decades and then I came in here one day...."

"Something that beautiful should never be buried especially not in favor of something so ugly," Dora said softly. 

"It didn't feel like I had a choice then," Regulus said. "I didn't have the...courage....that Sirius had or your mom had."

"It's hard for me to imagine that telling your family that you met someone who loves you, who you love should take courage," Dora said.

Regulus thought of Fred, that he was keeping him a secret. "So your mom was cool with you marrying a werewolf?"

Dora laughed. "Fair point. She was a bit...shocked and concerned at first but she saw that we did love each other and accepted it. Her parents couldn't accept her marriage and that took something away from her happiness and she wasn't going to do that to me."

"Was the 'shocked and concerned' phase really bad?" Regulus asked.

Dora looked at him puzzled. An odd question to ask. "Not really bad. I guess it never occurred to me that they wouldn't accept it though because they love me and Remus loves me.... Why do you ask?"

Regulus felt the auror's interrogation beginning. "No reason," he said quickly, instinctively blocking his mind from her. Even if she were a legilimens, she wouldn't use it against you, he reminded himself. She's not a Death Eater, not like them. "Just curious how functional families interact, I guess."

Dora looked at him sadly. 

"I don't need your pity," Regulus spat a bit harshly.

"You mistake empathy for pity."

"I don't deserve either. I agreed with disowning Andromeda," Regulus said needing to know if she would really still empathize if she truly knew him. 

Dora flinched slightly but recomposed herself. This wasn't exactly news. She'd heard it from her mom and from Sirius. "Did you ever meet my father?" Dora asked.

"No," Regulus said. "We didn't even know she was dating him until after she'd married him."

"He's a wonderful man. Kind, funny. Still totally in love with my mother even after all these years," Dora smiled at a memory. "She was devastated when he was killed."

"He's dead?" Regulus asked. "Why isn't he here?"

Dora looked confused. 

"With you? Didn't he come to the in between?"

"I guess I...I don't know how that works."

"I didn't either," Regulus confessed. "I guess the person who is already here gets some sort of feeling when someone they love dies and then you follow that feeling to the in between. I'm not sure it's obvious though. Like when Sirius died...I remember a day when I couldn't stop thinking about him but I didn't know... But James and Lily knew and met him in the in between so maybe your dad didn't know?"

"So I could see him again?" Dora asked hopefully.

"If you can find him," Regulus said. "Sirius and I just happened upon each other really. Well, I was in an obvious place but he didn't know I'd betrayed Voldemort so he didn't know to look. But your dad...we should be able to find him."

"So what happens if you don't know anyone here?" Dora asked.

"Like if no one meets you? That happened to me. I just wandered around in the mist for a long time and then I was so tired...I just thought about my bed at Grimmauld Place and I was there."

"So he may be at home?"

"Maybe. Do you want to go look? I can help you if you want," Regulus offered a bit shyly.

Dora looked at him in surprise.

"Consider it my atonement."

Dora nodded. "Let's go then."

Regulus and Dora walked into the hallway where they ran into Fred.

"I was just looking for you," Fred said to Regulus without thinking. "To...um...see if you wanted to play Quidditch."

Regulus smiled at Fred knowing that Quidditch was the last thing on his mind. "I would but I promised to help Dora find her father. Apparently, he died a few months ago but he didn't come to the in between." Though I'd rather be kissing you.

Dora looked between Regulus and Fred her heightened auror sense aroused but she couldn't quite figure out why. "Why don't you come with us, Fred?"

"Sure. I could stand some fresh air," Fred said quickly. Being with Regulus was better than not being with him even if they did have an inconvenient chaperone. 

"Let's go then." Dora held out her hands. "I just think about it and go?"

"That's all there is to it," Regulus said taking Dora's hand and then taking Fred's hand leaving Dora with an empty hand.

Dora looked at them a bit oddly for a moment but then retracted her empty hand and apparated them to her childhood home. She landed them in a cozy sitting room in a comfortable but not grand house. 

"Oi Dad? Are you here?" Dora called. "I'll check upstairs." She left them in the sitting room.

"I..." Fred began.

Regulus kissed Fred before he could say anything more not wanting to waste a moment of privacy. 

"I don't see him," Dora said coming down the stairs.

Regulus let go of Fred who looked dazed. 

Dora looked at Fred strangely. "Everything okay down here? You looked a bit winded, Fred."

"All good here," Regulus said.

"Just fine," Fred managed sitting down on the nearest couch and putting a pillow in his lap.

"Not up there then?" Regulus asked. 

"No but I think maybe he's been here," Dora said. "It's a bit of a mess and somehow I feel that Mum would have it neat even in this dimension if she could."

"We can wait. Maybe he'll return," Regulus suggested. 

"Thanks for doing this," Dora said.

Regulus sat down next to -- but not too close to -- Fred. "The least we could do, Cuz."

Dora sat down in a chair across from them. "So Fred, how are things? I feel like we haven't really had a chance to catch up since...Bill and Fleur's wedding, was it?"

"I didn't realize the two of you were friends," Regulus said.

"Friends, yes. Nearly more. Mum quite fancied Tonks for a daughter-in-law," Fred explained.

"Married to you??" Regulus asked incredulously.

"Not THAT much of a shock, is it?" Dora asked. "Though she was thinking of Bill not Fred."

"No...not that much of a shock...just...you're a bit young," Regulus stuttered. 

Fred bit back a smile and an urge to kiss Regulus for being adorable. "Mum takes her opportunities where she can find them especially after failing with Charlie for years."

Regulus sought safer ground. "So you and Bill dated before Fleur?"

"No. I was already interested in Remus when I met Bill. Just Molly's dearest hope."

"Unlike every male in Fleur's vicinity, Mum was a bit immune to her veela charms," Fred explained.

"Were you attracted to her?" Regulus asked Fred and then realized he shouldn't have.

"I...uh..." Fred considered whether the truth, no, was correct or the lie, yes, of course, was the way to go. He looked at Dora. "Uh...not like Ron was. Poor thing even tried to ask her out once. Barely survived it."

Regulus laughed. "Rejected, huh?"

"I'm not sure actually. He ran away before she could answer," Fred said. "It would have been an excellent time to have one of those muggle movie maker gadgets."

"Clearly, she has a thing for red hair. Could have been Ron," Dora said. 

"He's in love with Hermione whether he knows it or not," Fred said.

"Your brother does like them out of his league, huh?" Regulus said.

"I feel I should try to defend Ron's honor but yeah...way out of his league," Fred agreed. 

"I don't know. Ron's cute in his Ron way. Of course, you'd have to like the red hair," Dora said.

"I quite like red hair," Regulus said and then realized what he'd said and looked horrified. 

Fred looked shocked and then tried to cover. "Well, I'm sure I have a slew of cousins who would fit the bill." He dared a glance at Regulus who was blushing. 

Dora was sure there was something odd going on but still couldn't quite put her finger on it. "So how did the two of you become friends?"

"We...uh...well I tripped over him, you see," Regulus began.

"I couldn't sleep. That first night here. So I was laying in the grass watching the moon and he tripped over me."

"Just started talking from there really," Regulus agreed.

"I guess I'm a bit surprised that you had much in common. You're a bit opposite," Dora said trying not to use her auror suspect questioning training for evil but really curious.

"Well, we both have older brothers who everyone thinks are perfect," Fred began.

"And we both played Quidditch," Regulus supplied. 

"And we both died young fighting Voldemort," Fred added. 

"And sometimes opposites attract, right?" Regulus said. "I mean, in a friendship way." Not in a 'I'm dying to kiss him right now' sort of way.

"Right platonic attraction," Fred said trying to beat down a sudden image of Regulus naked in the shower. He felt his face flaming and hugged the pillow tighter against his lap.

"Are you..." Dora began but was interrupted by the arrival of Ted Tonks. "Dad!" she cried and ran into Ted's arms.

They hugged while Fred and Regulus looked at each other a bit awkwardly. 

"Maybe some privacy?" Regulus suggested.

"Yeah," Fred agreed discreetly following Regulus into the kitchen. 

Regulus took Fred's hands and pulled him closer. 

"I thought the privacy was for them," Fred smirked.

"I don't see why this can't be a win-win situation," Regulus said kissing Fred, his arms going around Fred's waist. 

"Very practical," Fred agreed between kisses his hands exploring Regulus' torso. "So you really like red heads?"  
"I like one red head in particular," Regulus said.

Fred smiled. "Good answer." He kissed Regulus again. 

**************************************

In the sitting room, Ted reluctantly let go of Dora. 

"You're...dead?" Ted said finally. "I didn't know.... How? Remus?"

"Yeah, Remus too. In the same battle almost at the same time," Dora said. "At least I never had to mourn him. We'll be together forever now but...."

"The baby?" Ted asked.

"A boy," Dora smiled wistfully. "We named him Teddy after you."

Ted smiled happy to see his daughter but crushed by the sadness that had already befallen his grandson. "Your mom?"

"Devastated by your death, of course, but pretending she's fine," Dora said. 

"I would expect nothing else," Ted said. "The Blacks invented being inscrutable," he said with the slightest bitterness on "Blacks". 

"I'm actually here with one," Dora remembered. "A Black that is. My cousin, Regulus."

"Sirius' brother?" Ted asked with surprised. "Wasn't he..."  
"Yes but he realized he was wrong and died trying to stop Voldemort."

Ted laughed slightly. "So three of the five cousins turned out okay. That family needs to work on their evil-doing skills."

"For what it's worth, Aunt Bellatrix more than made up for the rest of them," Dora assured him.

"Not surprised. She was an awful excuse for a human being even as a child," Ted remembered. "So where is this cousin?"

Dora looked around. "They were right here. I guess they thought we needed privacy or something." She lead Ted into the kitchen. "I want you to meet...." 

Fred and Regulus let go and stepped away from each other. 

"...my cousin, Regulus," Dora finished.

Regulus held out his hand politely, wondering if he should begin with a blanket apology for every time he'd called Ted a mudblood. Not to his face, of course, but he wasn't sure that negated the need for the apology. "Pleased to meet you, Ted."

"The pleasure is all mine, Regulus," Ted said. He felt tears come to his eyes. "I'm sorry. You just look a lot like my wife."

"I'm sorry.... I...." Regulus stuttered unsure what to say. Sorry that 1000 years of marrying cousins is causing you emotional anguish?

"Fred Weasley," Fred said extending his hand to Ted more as distraction than anything. 

"Of course. We know your parents," Ted said trying to shake off the feeling of seeing a ghost. Of course, HE was the ghost.....

"We were sorry to hear that you died," Fred said. "We had a bit of a memorial service on Potterwatch for you."

Ted looked touched. "So many deaths...."

"We tried to mention everyone but the ones we knew, I guess, got a little more attention," Fred explained. "And Tonks...Dora...was a friend and fellow Order member."

"Fred died with me and Remus," Dora said.

"So the war is still going on," Ted stated.

"No actually. It's over. We were some of the last casualties," Fred said. "And Reg here was one of the first."

"How did you all find each other? I got here and I was alone...." Ted said.

"Me too," Regulus said. "You're supposed to get a feeling when someone dies. Like the day Sirius died, I couldn't stop thinking about him but I didn't know what it meant."

"You died a few weeks ago?" Ted asked Dora.

Dora nodded. 

"So you were in that place alone?" Ted asked sadly.

"No. Not exactly. Because Remus died when I did, Sirius and the Potters were all there for him," Dora explained.

"One stop shopping at the in between that day," Fred said. "I don't think anyone would have been there for me either if not for Remus."

"I don't know. Our bonds with Sirius may have been strong enough to call him without Remus but his bond with Remus was so strong that it erased any other calls he may have received," Dora explained.

"So you and Remus are together but where?" Ted asked.

"We're living with the Potters right now. Pretty much everyone is, in fact," Dora said.

"It is starting to feel like EVERYONE is," Regulus agreed remembering when the house was less crowded. He looked at Fred. Some benefits to overcrowding though. He fought back a sudden urge to hold Fred's hand. "They have a big house. I guess Monty's dad invented Sleak-easy or something."

"You should come back with us," Dora said to Ted. "You don't have to live there but Remus would like to see you and I'd like you to meet everyone."

Ted nodded and took Dora's hand.

Regulus took Fred's hand in the guise of apparating but really just wanting to touch him. 

Dora looked at them oddly. No need to hold hands when you both know where you're going....

**************************

Fred looked around Regulus' room a bit surprised to not be surrounded by people in a much more public area. "Won't they wonder where we went?"

"Ted will be a distraction for at least an hour or two...meanwhile...." Regulus slipped his fingers under the button of Fred's trousers and pulled Fred to him, kissing him. Their kissing became more passionate. "I want you," Regulus murmured between kisses. Clothes disappeared quickly. 

Fred pushed Regulus onto the bed and laid down on top of him. "That could be arranged." He kissed him, his mouth, his neck, rubbing against him. He did the spell and gently entered him. 

"You don't have to be so gentle," Regulus moaned in pleasure.

"Oh I don't, huh?" Fred murmured and bit Regulus' neck, thrusting harder and faster. 

Regulus moaned loudly, moving his hips to give Fred better, deeper access. "Mm...."

Fred groaned with pleasure and stroked Regulus' cock in time with his thrusts. 

"Oh...mmm....Fred...oh yes, yes...." Regulus murmured incoherently as he came into Fred's hand gripping Fred's ass hard enough to leave bruises. 

Fred felt his own orgasm coming as he plunged deeper and deeper into Regulus until he came and collapsed onto a panting Regulus. 

"Bloody hell. That keeps getting better and better," Regulus gasped trying to catch his breath.

"Good Merlin, you're sexy as hell, "Fred murmured into the mattress where is face ended up when his body lost the ability to hold its own weight. "I can't keep my hands off you. Today has been absolute torture."

"Please don't try," Regulus said pulling Fred's head up and kissing him. 

Fred snuggled against the crook of Regulus' neck. They cuddled quietly for a few minutes.

"So about that night after the Battle of Hogwarts..." Fred began a conversation he'd been meaning to have with Regulus.

"I really am sorry about disappearing," Regulus said. "I just...."

"No, no. I mean, it sucked." Fred kissed Regulus gently. "I missed you but I just...I'm sorry that I kissed you. No, that's not true. I'm not at all sorry that I kissed you. It's just that the timing was a bit dodgy." He took a deep breath. "I just didn't want you to think that I only wanted to be friends with you to..."

"Get in my knickers?" Regulus asked. "So it wasn't?"

"No!" Fred said adamantly. "I was afraid that you might think that."

"I did for a bit," Regulus admitted.

" No. Don't think that ever. I would want to be friends with you even if you had no interest in me...in your knickers. The worst part of those 6 days was thinking that now we couldn't be friends because I made it awkward or even worse that you thought my friendship was conditional."

Regulus considered this. It certainly wasn't why he was shagging Fred but it was still nice to hear. 

"Don't get me wrong, I am THRILLED that you do want me in your knickers. Definitely the best case scenario," Fred said. 

Regulus laughed. "I really do want you in my knickers but I'm happy we can be friends too."

Fred hugged Regulus a bit tighter. "Me too." 

They lay in silence for a moment, gently touching each other.

"How did you know?" Regulus asked. "When I didn't."

Fred considered this. "It wasn't just one thing. Just moments. I think if I listed them, they wouldn't seem like much evidence but I was at least somewhat sure when I kissed you." 

"Somewhat sure?"

"I had a pros and cons list in my head about whether or not to kiss you. My mom was always a big proponent of those. And there were a few cons most notably 'he may not be gay' but the pro was...well obvious and sort of outweighed the rest and honestly, you just walk around looking like you need to be kissed."

"I do?"

"Well, that's what it looks like to me," Fred said. "You really didn't know?"

"I knew I really liked you but...well I'm not really an expert on friendship so I guess I thought it was that. Why I always wanted to be around you. Why I kept having these weird urges to touch you. Okay so it's a bit obvious now but I'd been with girls before..."

"Me too. Well, a couple anyway," Fred said. "One of them was a veela."

"Fleur?" Regulus asked surprised.

"Bridesmaid cousin," Fred said. "I couldn't...well, I had to think about someone else, pretend she was someone else. Sort of the final clue for me."

"Who did you think about?" Regulus asked feeling a bit jealous. 

"This bloke I saw at the wedding. He looked a bit like you actually," Fred said.

"Was he dancing with Hermione?" Regulus asked.

"Yeah actually," Fred said confused.

"That WAS me," Regulus said. "We were there trying to tell Hermione where the horcrux locket was." 

Fred touched Regulus' face. "That was you," he said softly. "You took my breath away."

"I saw you too. Dancing with George and Luna. I couldn't stop thinking about you afterward, worrying about you. The Death Eaters...."

"I...uh...was trying to shag the veela when they showed up," Fred admitted. "We got away."

"That was the first time I really understood the consequences of my actions before...when I was a Death Eater," Regulus said quietly. "The first time I ever felt the terror, felt...empathy...for the victims. I kept imagining them torturing you. I could hear you screaming."

"Me?" Fred asked. 

"You...I guess I should have known, huh?" Regulus said. "I always thought my lack of interest in girls was just the war, you know? No time for such things. Though apparently my brother shagged every girl at Hogwarts that he wasn't related to so maybe the war was just an excuse. Even the ones I was with...it wasn't like it is with you. I didn't care if I saw them at all. Didn't think to touch them for no reason. Certainly didn't fantasize about kissing them or taking hot, sexy showers with them."

Fred smiled at the memory which was stirring other things up. "Very hot," he agreed. He kissed Regulus, his hands running down his chest, his stomach to stroke his cock which was already growing hard. "Shower?"

"Too far away," Regulus said rolling over on top of Fred, kissing him. He did the spell himself and then guided Fred inside of him moaning as Fred started thrusting. "You feel so good," he murmured against Fred's lips. "I should have known..."

Later, spent and exhausted, they dosed for a bit sprawled on top of each other. 

*******************************  
Meanwhile, James, Remus, and Sirius sat in the garden enjoying the sun and butter beers.

"This place is missing a lake," Sirius said.

"Like Hogwarts?" James asked. "It is a lake short of perfection."

"Do you think we could create a lake?" Sirius asked. "A proper lake with lake inhabitants like Merpeople and grindylows."

"I'm not sure you could convince the Merpeople to come live in your lake, Padfoot," Remus said.

"I don't see why not. I can be pretty convincing and I'm envisioning a really nice lake here," Sirius said.

"What do you think it might take? You'd need a large hole, of course," James said.

"Some way to connect it to the rest of the lakes," Sirius agreed. "The Merpeople woudn't come otherwise."

"You can't just build a lake," Remus said recognizing the developing signs of a long term passion project. 

"Oi Remus!" Dora shouted at the far end of the garden.

"Over here, darling," Remus called back. 

Dora and Ted walked over to the Marauders. 

"Ted!" Remus said in surprise and stood up to greet his father-in-law. The two hugged. "Where did you find him?"  
"At the house. Eventually. He was gone for a bit but Reg and Fred waited with me," Dora said. 

"Oi cuz-in-law," Sirius said and hugged Ted. "I didn't know you'd died!"

"Sorry. With everything going on...." Dora said helplessly. 

Sirius realized. "Andromeda...she lost you both?" he asked sadly. 

Ted nodded. "She's strong. She'll carry on."

"Yeah...." Sirius said still sad for his favorite cousin. "I know she will and she has Teddy to look after but it's still too much loss." 

"I know," Ted said sadly. He looked at James. "James Potter, of course. You look just like Harry or really Harry looks just like you at 17."

"You know my son?" James asked.

"Yeah he and Hagrid crash landed in the pond behind our house," Ted said. To Sirius, "Sorry about your motorbike, mate. It's a bit of a mess. I fished the pieces out of the pond and sent them on to Arthur. He thought he might try to rebuild and give it to Harry....He's still alive? Harry?"

"Yeah, Dad. He made it through," Dora said. 

"You must stay for supper, Ted," James insisted. "Or whatever passes for it. I'm afraid my parents are off visiting some friends and our wives have deserted us for Paris."

"I'd love to, thanks," Ted said.

****************************

Fred and Regulus were asleep sprawled on top of each when a loud banging on the door made them bolt upright. 

"Bloody hell. What time is it?" Regulus hissed.

Fred shrugged not even sure what day it was.

"Who is it?" Regulus asked.

"It's James."

Regulus leapt up pulling clothes on. 

Fred grabbed his clothes, kissed Regulus quickly and apparated.. 

Regulus opened the door in what he hoped was a nonchalant manner. "What's up?"

"Just wondered what you were doing. They're all talking to Ted but I don't really know him and..."

"You're bored?" Regulus guessed. "You do realize I'm not Sirius, right?"

"Yes! Though your hair's about as messy as his right now."

Regulus blanched. He hadn't thought about his hair. He was lucky to have his clothes on.

"What were you doing in here?" James asked.

"Nothing. Reading," Regulus lied quickly but not well.

James looked suspicious but let it go. "So you wanna go take a walk on the wild side?"

Regulus thought he'd just about been caught doing just that but said," Did you just quote Lou Reed?"

"You know who Lou Reed is?" James asked surprised.

"Stuck sharing a bathroom with Sirius, remember? I am well versed in Muggle rock bands," Regulus said. "I'm up for a walk on the wild side though. A quick romp before dinner?"

"You're my favorite brother, you know that, right?" James said putting his arm around Regulus and leading him downstairs. 

"Why do I think that changes based on who said yes to you last?" Regulus asked laughing.

*******  
Ted, Sirius, Remus, and Dora sat in the garden several butter beers in when Fred joined them.

Sirius wafted a beer over to Fred. "I was wondering where you were."

"Nowhere really. Here and there," Fred said in a tone that even he found suspicious. Dora's giving me the auror eye and is Remus sniffing me? Oh bloody hell. Do I smell like Regulus?

"So where's Regulus?" the auror asked Fred in what sounded to him like an accusatory tone.

"I don't want to alarm anyone but there's a lion just there at the edge of the woods," Ted said in his understated English way. 

"That answers that question," Sirius said. "Is there a stag with him perhaps? Because we sent James for more butter beer ages ago...."

"Indeed there is. Animagi?" Ted asked in a hopeful tone.

Fred looked at the lion in awe. His brain understood that it was Regulus but.... Curiosity got the better of him and he got up and walked over to the lion and the stag. The lion saw him and ran to meet him. For a moment, Fred envisioned being knocked down and mauled by the wild beast but the lion pulled up short and offered its head for petting. Fred petted the giant golden head that nuzzled his leg for a moment. Was the stag looking at him suspiciously? When you start thinking wild animals are looking at you suspiciously are you officially paranoid?

Ted, Sirius, Remus, and Dora joined them. 

"Impressive," Ted said. "They really look like wild animals."

Claws roared at Ted who jumped back from him. 

Sirius laughed. "You'll have to excuse my brother. He thinks he's funny with the roaring." 

Regulus nudged Ted's leg in apology. 

Ted tentatively scratched his head. "Good kitty."

"He prefers Claws," Sirius said. "Though I still think Mr. Meow-Meow was the right way to go."

Claws carefully jumped up on Sirius and roared in his face.

Sirius laughed and transformed into Padfoot chasing the lion into the woods. Prongs followed behind them.

"Extraordinary magic," Ted said. 

"Indeed," Remus said. "I really didn't think they could do it but then I should have known better than to doubt them once they've decided on something. Speaking of which, I think we're about to have a lake here populated by Merpeople."

"Oh that'll be quite nice," Dora said.

"This place was missing a lake," Fred agreed. He watched the animagi until they were out of sight feeling a bit jealous. He didn't notice the werewolf watching him.

****************************

Regulus returned to his room late that night exhausted from running around the woods. He didn't even bother turning on the light before stripping and climbing into bed. He smiled to himself as he found a warm sleeping Fred there. He curled himself around Fred and promptly fell asleep.

******

Fred woke as the sun first began to shine through the bedroom window. He smiled at Regulus still curled around him, head on his chest, fast asleep. He wondered how late he got in. He'd planned to wait up but apparently didn't make it. He watched Regulus sleep for a few minutes, long black eyelashes over pale cheeks. So beautiful, so peaceful. Fred was torn between the peace and other needs that had begun surfacing.

"Are you watching me sleep?" Regulus asked, eyes still closed.

"I thought I was," Fred replied. "How long have you been awake?"

"A few minutes. Too comfy to move though," Regulus murmured. 

"Why didn't you wake me when you got in?" Fred asked.

Regulus finally opened his eyes, looking at Fred. "It was late and you're really cute when you sleep...."

"I tried to wait up...."

"I quite loved finding you asleep in my bed actually," Regulus said. "Like it was our bed." He spoke honestly but then had a moment of panic. Was that too much? Too soon?

Fred smiled. "Our bed." He pulled Regulus closer.

Regulus relaxed and snuggled closer. "So were you waiting up for a reason?" he asked suggestively.

"Maybe," Fred said.

"What reason might that be?" Regulus asked innocently. 

"Let me show you," Fred murmured rolling over onto Regulus, kissing him deeply.


	37. City of Love

Remus and Dora puttered around the kitchen attempting to make tea and breakfast. Dora proved mostly unsuccessful breaking two tea cups in her efforts.

"Reparo!" Dora muttered.

"Why don't you just sit and keep me company while I manage this?" Remus suggested kissing his clumsy wife on the lips.

"I don't know why I'm so clumsy. My mum, Sirius, Regulus, all walk around like ballerinas," Dora complained.

Remus snorted with laughter. "Oh please tell Reg and Sirius you think they're ballerinas."

"You know what I mean!" Dora said laughing. "They're graceful and I am an absolute disaster."

"Yes, but you're MY absolute disaster," Remus said smiling. He kissed her and returned to breakfast making. "So you and Reg bonded a bit yesterday?"

"We did. I heard him playing and sort of fell into the room, knocked over a bookcase, the usual. But we talked for quite a long time and he volunteered to help find Dad. I quite like him really. He just doesn't seem...."

"Like a Death Eater?" Remus asked handing Dora a tea cup and then holding it until he was sure she had both hands around it..

"Exactly. Did you know him before? When he was?" Dora asked.

"Somewhat," Remus said. "Not well certainly. He and Sirius began drifting apart the moment the Sorting Hat called Slytherin. By the time he joined, they weren't really speaking much at all. Sirius had already moved in with the Potters and they certainly weren't speaking at school."

"So you think he really believed in the cause?" Dora asked. "Voldemort's cause?"

Remus sat down beside Dora. "I think he grew up in a family where certain eventualities were expected and he'd seen what happened when you rebelled against those eventualities. I'm sure having a very strained and difficult relationship with his brother who he both loved and hated didn't help him make the right choices either. Though certainly, he made the right choices in the end."

Dora considered this. "It makes me understand why my mom cut ties with them. Why she didn't even let me meet them. Not even Sirius. But I just wonder if she had stayed involved maybe she could have helped."

"I think Sirius wonders the same. If he would have stayed in Reg's life, could he have influenced his choices? I'm not sure that's knowable though," Remus said. He got up and returned to the stove. "So you took Reg and Fred with you to find your dad yesterday?"

"I did. Reg and I were headed out when we ran into Fred so he came along too," Dora explained.

Remus looked thoughtful.

"What is it?" Dora said.

"Have you noticed anything unusual between Regulus and Fred?" Remus asked continuing the breakfast preparation.

Dora looked up at him. "Unusual how?"

"Unusual like...you know...." Remus said turning to face her and raising his eyebrows.

"Like you know what?" Dora said and then realized. "Like that...yeah there were some moments when I wondered. Just little moments...."

"So you see it?" Remus said with relief. "I'd smelled them on each other, of course, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything. I've smelled Sirius and James on each other since I've met them and I'm 90% sure they haven't...."

"Only 90% sure?" Dora asked surprised.

"I feel confident that they have a 'vault' between them named 'Things Too Weird and/or Illegal to Tell Remus About' and honestly, I'm good with that," Remus said.

Dora laughed. "If Fred and Regulus are together, they should tell Sirius before someone else does."

"Should tell Sirius what?" Sirius asked walking into the kitchen.

"My wife thinks you move like a ballerina," Remus said. "Please discuss," he smirked.

"I could see that," James agreed following Sirius into the kitchen. "You are strangely graceful, Pads."

"I'm not a ballerina!" Sirius cried in mock indignation. "I would look bloody awful in a tutu!"

"I don't think male ballerinas wear tutus," James said. "What do they call a male ballerina?"

"Ballerino?" Sirius suggested.

"Yes, actually, I think it IS ballerino," Dora said.

"I think you could pull off tights and that codpiece thing, Pads," James assured Sirius.

"I appreciate your faith, Prongs," Sirius said. "Though I shudder to ask how it came up in the first place."

"I was perplexed as to how I can be so clumsy when you and Reg are graceful like ballerinas. Ballerinos...." Dora explained.

"That is a mystery," Sirius agreed. "Ted must have three left feet."

"Where is Reg anyway?" James asked. "He went to bed when we did and yet somehow we're down here at a reasonable hour...."

"I'm not buying that 'lions are nocturnal' rubbish," Sirius said.

"I think it's time our young lion is taught a valuable life lesson," James said to Sirius with a mischievous look on his face.

Remus and Dora glanced at each other in alarm. Remus was the first to take action. "So I was thinking that we may track down your wives in Paris today. Do a bit of sightseeing."

Dora gave Remus a "we were?" look.

Remus gave Dora a "help me out here" look.

"Oh yes, we were just talking about that," Dora agreed. "Mum and I used to go to Paris all the time but I haven't been in ages."

"Excellent idea!" Sirius said.

"Top notch plan!" James said.

"We should invite Reg and Fred," Sirius suggested.

"Let's go wake them up!" James cried.

James and Sirius ran out of the room.

Remus and Dora sighed in frustration.

**************************************

Fred and Regulus lay wrapped up together kissing, touching.

"I should probably go," Fred said not moving. "They'll start wondering where we are."

"Let them wonder," Regulus said kissing Fred. "I think we should stay in bed all day."

"Really?" Fred asked.

Regulus sighed. "I know, I know. You're right."

"I don't want to be right," Fred said. He started trying to disentangle himself.

"Maybe...." Regulus started. Maybe this secret needed to be not secret. "But not yet...."

Fred got up and then leaned over and kissed Regulus. "I'm in no hurry. They're your family, Reg. You tell me when." He kissed Regulus again.

The door flew open. Fred apparated in a panic as James and Sirius came in on a wave of exuberance.

"What the hell?" Regulus bolted upright in shock.

"You're up!" James cried bouncing down on the bed.

"Excellent!" Sirius said. "Get dressed. We have to go."

"Go where?" Regulus said trying to will his heart to slow down to something that felt less like a medical emergency.

"Paris, of course!" Sirius said flopping down next to James.

"Of course. I don't know why that wasn't obvious," Regulus snarked.

"I'll go get Fred moving," James said. "I get why you slept in -- we were out pretty late -- but Fred went to bed early."

"Weird," Sirius agreed. "Maybe he's depressed being away from George?"

"Maybe. Well, Paris will cheer him up," James said on his way out the door.

"Has he said anything to you?" Sirius asked Regulus.

"Has who said what?" Regulus asked trying to ignore the alarm bells in his head.

"Fred. You've been spending a lot of time with him. Which is great, by the way. Great choice of best mate," Sirius said. "It's good that you're making friends, Reg. It really seems like things are better with you."

Friends. Yeah. Friends. Just Friends. "I quite like him actually. As a friend," Regulus added awkwardly.

"Of course. What else?" Sirius asked eyeing Regulus oddly. "Anyway, let's meet downstairs and we'll get going," Sirius said as he got up from the bed and walked out the door.

Regulus collapsed on the bed. "Good bloody hell."

**********************************************  
James walked into Fred's room uninvited and unannounced and was a bit surprised to find Fred standing there naked. Fred was equally surprised.

"What the fuck, mate?" Fred cried. "Knock first, why don't you?" He grabbed the blanket from the bed and covered himself.

"Well, I didn't think you'd just be standing there naked, did I?" James retorted.

"I was headed to the shower!" Fred said. He was actually but that was't why he was naked.

"What's that mark on your neck? And that one on your chest?" James asked.

"None of your bloody business!" Fred said trying not to show fear. Blustery indignation was his strategy. "Why are you in my room???"

"Because we're all going to Paris and it's bloody noon and you're not up yet. I swear, between you and Reg, it's like living with vampires. Let's go!" James cried.

"Fine, fine. Can I at least get dressed in peace?" Fred asked indignantly.

James felt his brain synthesizing some pieces of information. "Where did you get those marks?" he asked again.

"What part of none of your business was unclear?" Fred yelled. Too much, too defensive.

"Are you seeing someone?" James asked. "You hooked up with some girl at the victory party and didn't tell us? You know, Marauders are required to share such information with each other. It's in the by laws."

A girl. Of course, why didn't I think of that? "Yeah, something like that."

"Who is she?" James pressed.

"Still none of your bloody business...that's who she is!" Fred raged.

"You don't have to get snippy about it. I was just curious," James said a bit hurt.

"Sorry. It's nothing. Just let it go, please?" Fred begged wishing he didn't sound so desperate.

James looked at him oddly, smelling something that smelled a lot like a mystery. "Okay. Keep your secrets. For now," James said and winked before he finally left Fred alone to get dressed.

"Bloody fucking hell," Fred moaned sinking onto the bed.

**********************************

30 minutes later, everyone was assembled in the kitchen and ready for departure.

Fred and Regulus unconsciously migrated toward each other not noticing the look of confirmation between Remus and Dora and the contemplative looks on James' and Sirius' faces.

"So where might these elusive wives of yours be?" Regulus asked James and Sirius.

"Names and appearances changed and in a completely different country if they had any sense," Remus snarked.

James and Sirius shot him matching death stares.

"We'll go to Paris and then use these..." Sirius pointed at his wrists. "...to track them."

"Somehow I don't think that's what they were meant for," Dora said.

"They're to find her if she's lost," Sirius said.

"She's not lost," Fred pointed out.

"I'm lost without her," Sirius said. "Close enough."

"Close enough," Regulus agreed and gave Sirius a quick one armed hug.

"Let's go then!" James said.

Everyone joined hands and they apparated to the Coquelicot boulangerie and were immediately overwhelmed by the aromas of fresh croissant.

"I love this place!" James exclaimed. "We need eclairs before we can go anywhere."

"Why do you think we're starting here?" Sirius asked him.

"Brilliant as always, Pads," James said.

"I remember this place," Regulus said.

"So do I," Dora said.

"Andromeda...."

"Mom...."

"It makes me strangely happy that she kept coming here even after...." Sirius said.

"No trip to Paris was complete without stopping here," Dora said.

Regulus had already headed to the counter and was speaking rapid French to the cashier.

Dora joined him adding to the order in equally fluent French.

"Were you all just born speaking French?" Fred asked.

"The benefits of a well rounded staff of tutors," Sirius explained. "Well, me and Reg. Not sure about Dora. Andromeda, I would assume." He turned to Remus. "Just think. Your son will probably speak French before he speaks English."

"As long as that's all he learns from the Blacks," Remus said.

Dora and Regulus returned with sacks of pastries in their hands and cafes au lait floating beside their heads.

"It's such a lovely day," Dora said. "We thought we'd eat outside."

Everyone followed the pastries to the tables and chairs that line most streets in Paris. All the better to watch life go by. They sat down.

Regulus sat down next to Fred and handed him the sack full of the best selection that he'd purposely kept aside for them. They were too busy sorting through their stash to notice various sets of eyes glancing over at them.

Aurora and Lily appeared and joined the group.

"So you decided you couldn't live without us for another second?" Lily asked James teasingly, sitting down next to him and helping herself to a croissant.

"Yes, exactly," Sirius said missing the joke.

Aurora sat down next to Sirius. "I missed you too," she said softly and kissed him.

"Why don't I get a kiss?" James asked affronted.

Lily kissed him.

Regulus watched the three couples being openly affectionate with each other. Why should he and Fred be different? He knew why, of course, but would they think it should be different? What would happen if he just started kissing Fred right now? He felt Fred's hand on his knee and looked over at him. Fred was looking at the couples too. Maybe kissing Fred wouldn't be the best idea but maybe it was time to tell.... He just wasn't sure where to start and so he was quiet. He reached under the table and took Fred's hand. He glanced over at Fred wanting him to know that this wasn't to do with him or how he felt about him but Fred was busy with an eclair and didn't notice.

Remus watched everyone as he picked apart a croissant. Sirius and Aurora kissing. James and Lily whispering to each other. And Fred and Regulus...he was fairly certain they were holding hands under the table and while he would never share his suspicions with anyone but Dora, he did think that they could use some encouragement. "Reg, have you been to La Halle St Pierre?"

"Not in years. Great place though," Regulus said.

"I was thinking of checking it out. Care to join me?" Remus asked.

"What is it?" James asked.

"Bookstore," Sirius said with a yawn.

"I'd love to go," Lily said.

Remus shot Dora a pointed look.

"Oh! I was hoping we might have a little girl time," Dora suggested, wondering exactly what that may entail.

Aurora and Lily looked at Dora, the least girly girl they knew, with surprise.

"Great idea!" Remus said a bit too enthusiastically. "Reg?"

"Yeah I'll go with you," Regulus said and then glanced at Fred who everyone knew to be not a great purveyor of books.

"No boring books for me," Fred said trying not to sound disappointed. He looked at James and Sirius. "What mischief will you be managing?"

"Something that I'm sure I want no part of," Remus said. He turned to Regulus. "Shall we?"

Regulus and Remus apparated to the bookstore but Remus stopped Regulus before he could open the door.

"I do want to go to the bookstore but I thought maybe we could talk first," Remus said.

"About what?" Regulus asked warily.

"Did I ever tell you about the day your brother and James figured out I was a werewolf?"

Regulus looked at Remus incredulously. "Uh. No?" Considering this is our first one on one conversation, Regulus thought.

"My parents never thought I'd be able to attend Hogwarts but Dumbledore allowed it on two conditions. First, that I was locked up on the full moon and second, that no one ever find out what I was. If anyone found out, I would have to leave."

Regulus listened politely mainly because Remus had always been nice to him though he couldn't fathom why he insisted on telling him all this.

"Of course, I was sick two weeks out of every month and had to mysteriously go away every month and there is nothing your brother and James like better than a good mystery to solve. It's like they considered secret keeping a personal affront and so they spent the next year trying to figure out what was wrong with me and I lived in fear of the day that they would eventually figure it out."

Regulus was starting to get a much clearer idea of why he was hearing this story.

"It was a few days after the full moon in September of our second year. I'd just got out of the hospital wing and found them all waiting in our room and I knew they knew and I was sure that they would reject me, would hate me, would tell and get me kicked out. I'd tried so hard not to get attached to them but they were my best mates.... Anyway, I tried to steel myself for what was coming. "

_Flashback_

_"We know you're a werewolf," Sirius began. "And we're thinking we could maybe help you. Make it a little less awful."_

_"We read the books, mate, and we can't believe you've been going through that on your own. You could have told us. We could have helped," James added._

_Remus heard nothing but the sounds of the world crashing down around him._

_"... And maybe if we learned to change the bandages then you wouldn't have to stay so long in the hospital wing," Sirius finished._

_Remus didn't understand the words coming out of Sirius' or James' mouths._

_"And we were wondering if more physical exercise before the full moon might make you less antsy," James said._

_The words slowly began seeping into Remus' consciousness but they didn't make a lot of sense. "You're not going to tell anyone?"_

_"Why would we tell someone?" Sirius asked incredulously. "You could get kicked out of school!!"_

_"But I'm a monster! I'm dangerous! And you're living with me!"_

_"Um. You wear sweater vests," Sirius pointed out. "A danger to good taste maybe."_

_James laughed. "Really Remus, you're like the least dangerous person I know."_

_"You understand what a werewolf is, right?" Remus asked._

_"We read every book on lycanthropy in the library and I do have perfect recall so I'm going with yes," Sirius said._

_"Thus our well thought out suggestions regarding how we're going to help you," James said._

_Remus felt tears in his eyes. "You don't hate me?"_

_"What? What kind of idiocy is that?" Sirius asked. "We're best mates. We love you." He put his arm around Remus._

_"You think some furry little problem would change that? What the hell is wrong with you?" James asked also putting his arm around Remus._

_End of Flashback_

"So you know," Regulus said. " About me and Fred. Are you going to tell?"

"No, of course not. It's not my secret to tell. But I think you could tell if you wanted to," Remus said. "He'll still love you. James too if you care. They're not judgmental."

"He was pretty judgmental when he found out I was a Death Eater," Regulus pointed out.

"He was terrified for you and with good reason. But this is good news! You've found someone who makes you happy and he'll be happy for you. As I am. As Dora is."

"Dora knows too?"

"You weren't particularly subtle the other day and she is an auror."

Regulus cringed knowing Remus was right.

"Anyway, my point is that you don't need to carry this secret around. You don't need to hide the affection you feel for Fred. Just tell Sirius."

Regulus nodded wanting to believe Remus was right.

**********

The day passed wandering around Montmartre. It had been impossible to keep such a large group together and small groups had formed. It was late afternoon when Fred and Regulus found themselves to be a group of two wandering in and out of the eclectic shops on the Rue Norvins.

Fred took Regulus' hand. "Looks like it's just us."

Regulus smiled and kissed Fred. "Juste deux touristes amoureux." He blushed and was suddenly relieved that Fred didn't speak French.

"You speaking French is sexy as hell," Fred whispered. "Will you speak it later? In bed perhaps?"

Regulus smiled seductively. "Peut-être. Si vous êtes un bon copain."

They strolled hand in hand around Montmartre stopping to chat with local artists, feeding pigeons, watching the people go by. Regulus couldn't think of a better afternoon. He leaned over and kissed Fred.

"What was that for? Not that I minded."

"I just really love sitting here with you," Regulus said.

Fred smiled. "Me too." He put his arm around Regulus and pulled him closer.

Neither noticed James a few yards away buying a bouquet of flowers from a flower trolley but he most certainly noticed them.

***************************************************

James found Remus and Dora eating chocolate gelato at Amorino. He threw himself into the chair across from them tossing the flowers on the table.

"May we help you?" Remus asked.

"I need to tell you something but I'm not sure we should tell Sirius. Or maybe we should tell Sirius. Normally, I'm pretty good at reading him but this is a sort of odd thing though it did actually clear up some questions....."

Remus and Dora glanced at each other hoping that James hadn't figured out what they had figured out.

"Why don't you tell us what it is and then we'll help you decide what to do," Remus suggested cautiously.

"I was buying flowers for Lily..." James said pointing out the flowers thrown haphazardly on the table. "...and I saw...I saw Regulus and Fred. Like saw them...together. I think."

"What makes you think that?" Dora asked echoing Remus' calm, nothing to see here demeanor.

"They just seemed together. Fred had his arm around Regulus and...well Fred had what looked like hickeys this morning and when I asked who the girl was, he got sort of flustered and then Regulus was a bit disheveled last night..." He looked at Remus and Dora. "You already know."

Remus nodded. "We suspected."

"Does Sirius suspect?" James said.

"We don't think so," Dora said. "If he does, he hasn't mentioned it."

"He'd mention it," James said. "To one of us."

"I agree," Remus said.

"Should we tell him?" James asked.

"Of course not," Remus said.

"Because you think he'll freak out? I'm not sure that he will. I think he may be surprised but he's not a homophobe or anything like that." James spoke with certainty.

Dora glanced at Remus thinking he was probably right about James and Sirius and the vault.

"I think that we shouldn't tell Sirius because it's not our secret to tell," Remus clarified.

"What are we not telling Sirius?" Lily asked joining them.

"We think Fred and Regulus are together," James said.

"Of course they are. We left them together when you got tired of watching the mimes," Lily said.

"Not that sort of together," James said. "Together together."

"OH...that is interesting," Lily said. She gave it a bit of thought. "Good for them!"

"Yes, yes, we all agree but someone needs to tell Sirius, right?" James asked.

"Someone being Regulus, yes," Lily said. "Not you. You've finally forged some sort of relationship with Reg. Blabbing his secrets will not help."

"You are so lucky she married you," Remus told James.

"I know, I know. Okay so we won't tell but maybe we could encourage Reg to tell," James suggested.

"Why is it so important to you to have this secret out in the open?" Dora asked.

"Because he's never successfully kept anything from Sirius for more than 5 minutes," Remus said. "Here's Sirius now. You'll see. It's a sickness."

James glared at Remus.

Sirius and Aurora joined them. "What were you all talking about when we came in? It seemed intense."

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," James said quickly.

"Absolutely nothing?" Sirius asked suspiciously.

"I feel like I should have taken bets on this," Remus said under his breath to Dora.

"Nothing. Just...mimes!" James said triumphantly.

"Mimes? You were talking intently about mimes?" Sirius asked. "What specifically about mimes?"

"How...how quiet they are," James said.

"I can't watch this," Lily moaned. "Anyone else want ice cream?"

"Yes please," Aurora said.

They walked up to the counter.

"You're going to tell me anyway. Can we just get to it?" Sirius suggested.

"Remus says it's not my secret to tell!" James blurted out.

"Is it Remus' secret to tell?" Sirius asked Remus.

Remus shook his head.

"Whose secret is it?" Sirius asked James.

"Regulus!" James blurted and put his hand over his mouth looking horrified.

"Wow," Dora said. "You really weren't kidding."

Remus shook his head a bit embarrassed for James.

"What about Regulus?" Sirius said. "Is he okay?"  
"He's fine," Remus cut in. "Sirius, we all know you can make James tell but can you just not and let it go? Regulus will tell you when he's ready to tell you."

Sirius considered for a long moment. He had a suspicion that had been eating at him since Regulus had deemed it necessary to point out that he and Fred were "just friends" this morning. He'd been having an internal debate between "he's dated girls" and "he spends a LOT of time with Fred" all day and "didn't Fred date girls"? He was sure one of the twins had been dating someone but he couldn't bloody remember which twin was which though the more he thought about it, the more he thought it was George. He looked at James wondering if he could mentally ask him without having to ask the entire table. He locked eyes with James. "I never?" and cocked his head to one side questioningly.

Remus and Dora looked confused.

Good, Sirius thought.

"Yes, I think so," James said with relief. "But...different."

Sirius considered this. "For real?"

James nodded. "Yes, I think so.""Me too," Sirius said.

"He knows," James told Remus. "And not because I told him!!"

"They know?" Sirius asked James.

"About them not about us," James said and then paled realizing what he'd said.

Sirius closed his eyes and shook his head in exasperation.

"Well, I daresay we know about both now," Remus said. "Though I'd really be open to an obliviate spell to not know the second part."

Lily and Aurora returned with four ice creams.

"So has James spilled yet?" Lily asked.

Dora nodded. "It was a bit embarrassing."

"Why do you think I left," Lily said. "So you know about Fred and Regulus?" she asked Sirius.

"I'd already suspected but I don't know why it's such a big secret," Sirius said.

"Well, I'm sure if he knew about your little game of 'I never' he'd be more open to telling you," Remus said.

Lily and Aurora looked at Sirius questioningly.

"You're a git," Sirius told James.

James looked appropriately abashed.

"James and I were really fucking pissed drunk 6th year and playing that silly muggle game you taught us -- 'I never' -- and neither of us had ever kissed a boy so we made out a bit. Is everyone happy to know that? Wonderful." To James, "you are an awful secret keeper."

"Well, he did keep it for 20 years," Remus said.

"How much is 'a bit'?" Lily asked curiously.

"An interesting question, Lily," Aurora said looking at Sirius.

James considered crawling under the table.

"A bit is a bit. AND it was before either of you were sleeping with us which makes this none of your bloody business!" Sirius said realizing that he sounded way too defensive.

"In the interest of not being able to ever remove the mental image from our heads, I vote we return to the more important topic of how to give Reg a safe environment to get this Fred thing out in the open," Remus said.

"Yes! Well said, Moony," James said.

"I only asked because I thought it was kind of hot," Lily said.

"Maybe we could get a demonstration later?" Aurora asked.

James and Sirius looked at each other no clue as to whether they were being pranked or not.

Sirius considered and called their bluff. "We will if the two of you will."

"We will?" James asked surprised.

"Deal," Lily said calling Sirius' bluff.

"Okay this is really far more information than I want to have. Figure this bit out on your own time," Remus said.

"So Regulus and Fred," Dora said trying to get the conversation back on track. "Maybe if they get a taste of what being 'not a secret' feels like, they'll tell us."

"That sounds like an excellent idea, Dora. Did you have a plan?" Remus asked trying very hard to ignore the awkward questioning stares being thrown around the rest of the table.

"I did, Remus. I was thinking that we could all beg off dinner tonight. Find some reason why we can't go and then just let them have a little date night," Dora suggested.

"Brilliant idea, Dora. We'll go find Reg and Fred and the four of you...please don't be here when we get back. And PLEASE don't tell us where you're going," Remus begged.

Lily and Sirius continued to stare at each other waiting for the other one to fold.

"Shall we go?" Lily asked suggestively twirling her finger in Aurora's hair.

Aurora leaned over and blew in Lily's ear. "I'm ready if you are."

Sirius folded. "So...um...we were really drunk and we really just kissed and...uh...the other stuff seemed...uh...you know..."

"That's what I thought," Lily said. "You may be a brilliant chess player but you know better than to challenge me at poker, Black."

Aurora laughed. "I love you," she told Lily. "That was hysterical."

Remus laughed and then realized the pot could still be stirred. "So James, who's the better kisser?"

James glared at Remus. "You are a giant tosser."

Sirius and Lily looked at James waiting for his answer.

James looked homicidally at Remus.

Aurora sighed, kissed Sirius deeply, and then turned to Lily and did the same.

Everyone at the table stared at her stunned.

"It's close but I'm going to give the edge to Lily," Aurora said.

"What???" Sirius asked devastated.

"Don't worry, love, you have other things going for you that she doesn't," Aurora reminded him. "Maybe you should come remind me what they are?" She held out her hand to him and they disappeared.

"I was going to say you too," James insisted to Lily.

"Easy to say now, Prongs," Remus said laughing.

***********************************************************  
Regulus and Fred sat on a bench in front of Sacre Coeur with all of Paris in front of them.

"I can't believe they're all going back to the hotel early. It's PARIS," Regulus said.

"I think you're missing the silver lining here," Fred said.

"That they all went back to the hotel early and it's PARIS?" Regulus asked. "Didn't miss it at all." He leaned over and kissed Fred. "I think you should take me on a proper date."

"I was thinking that same thing, " Fred said. "Really what's the point of having a smoking hot boyfriend if you can't ever take him out in public?" he smirked.

Regulus flinched a bit. Was the secrecy starting to bother Fred more than he was saying?  
"I was joking, Reg. Not about you being smoking hot, of course. That's an objective fact," Fred said kissing Regulus.

"So where are you taking me?" Regulus asked and then realized that Fred wouldn't know where to go. "There's a place...."

"Leave that to me. I'm taking YOU on a proper date, remember?" Fred said. "It's not far."

Regulus offered Fred his hand and they walked down the Rue Norvins to Le Mandragore. The maitre d' led them to a beautifully set candlelit table with two blue velvet chairs.

"Very nice," Regulus said. "How did you know about this place?"

"I have my ways," Fred said mysteriously.

Regulus looked at him quizzically.

"I always thought I might like to travel someday. Our shop was doing well and I saw this place in a travel book about Paris and I thought I might like to take someone special there some day if there ever was someone special and now that there is...." Fred took Regulus' hands. "You're special. You know that, right? This isn't just a fling or something." He took a deep breath. Already this far down the rabbit hole. "I'm completely in love with you, Reg. Madly, truly, deeply, pick your adjective in love with you."

For the first time in his life, the tears in Regulus' eyes didn't feel like weakness though he blinked them back anyway. "I'm in love with you too, Fred...which is why it's so hard to hide...." he stopped the realization sudden and absolute. "I guess that's the answer, huh? I don't want to hide how I feel about you anymore. I can't. If that's okay with you. Telling them."

"Absolutely okay with me," Fred said and smiled at Regulus. He took Regulus' hands across the table.

"Have you ever told anyone? Your family?" Regulus asked.

"Just George," Fred admitted. "I thought there would be time to tell them when I felt more comfortable but there wasn't. I wish I could though. Tell them about you."

"Do you think they'd be okay with it?" Regulus said.

"I think they would be surprised but they would want me to be happy and you make me so happy, Reg," Fred said.

"You make me happy too," Regulus said softly massaging Fred's hand. "I never thought...after I died, at Grimmauld Place, I basically gave up, stopped living, if I'd ever started. I never thought I could be happy, could feel love like this, could give love like this...."

Fred leaned across the table and kissed Regulus. "You deserve love like this, Reg, and I do love you."

**************************************************************************************

Sirius and Aurora lay facing each other, basking in the afterglow.

"Is Lily really a better kisser than me?" Sirius asked.

Aurora laughed. "Are you sure you want to know?"

Sirius considered and then nodded.

Aurora sighed. "From a technique perspective yes. From a making me want to do naughty things immediately perspective, you definitely win."

Sirius smiled pleased with the answer. "What kind of naughty things?"

"Were you not paying attention a few minutes ago?" Aurora asked.

"So Lily doesn't make you want to do naughty things?" Sirius asked.

"Is that a disappointment?" Aurora asked.

"I'm torn," Sirius admitted. "Between thinking it might be hot and clawing my own eyes out because she's basically my sister." He remembered something. "Did you really think watching me and James would be hot or were you just being funny?"  
"A bit of both," Aurora said. "Was it hot?"

"With James? Honestly, it was 20 years ago and I was pretty drunk and I'm pretty sure he'd never kissed ANYONE before though he always drank when 'I've never kissed a girl' came up."

"Was there an answer in there somewhere?" Aurora asked with a smirk.

"It was...you're really going to make me answer this?"

"I'm curious," Aurora said. "I've only been with the opposite sex."

"Well, I wasn't with him. We didn't have sex. We discussed it but no one wanted to be the...you know...it seemed like it might be painful."

"You still haven't answered the question. Was it hot?"

Sirius sighed. "Yeah I guess. Hot enough that kissing led to other things but not like it is with you." He gently traced her nipple. "Not hot like just touching you makes me want more. It was more...practical. Like we could have wanked ourselves off but instead wanked each other off. I mean, he would do in a pinch but not really my first choice."

"Do you think that's what Regulus and Fred are? In a pinch?" Aurora asked.

Sirius considered this. "No, I don't. I think they really fancy each other."

"Did you know at all before today?" Aurora asked.

"No but...well, it's not like we were really speaking much until a few months ago. He had girlfriends at Hogwarts though. Granted, they were the sort of girls that he was expected to date."

"You didn't know about Fred either?" Aurora asked.

"No and he lived with me for a summer though honestly, I wasn't always sure which twin was which. Fred's a bit snarkier but if they weren't being snarky then it was hard to tell. Even their mom couldn't tell them apart half the time."

"But you like Fred?"

"I do. He's a good chap. I just hope Reg doesn't get hurt. He deserves some happiness not more pain."

*************************************************  
Fred pulled Regulus out of a club on Rue au Maire.

"What's going on? Are you okay?" Regulus asked.

"I just..look I'm not a jealous neanderthal but I really didn't like everyone looking at you the way they were looking at you and someone was going to get punched and...."

Regulus kissed Fred. "You're sort of cute when you're a jealous neanderthal. Not that any of them would ever get to do more than look. You know that, right?"

"Yeah, I know that but...." Fred started.

"No buts," Regulus said taking Fred's hands. "No one touches but you...and no one touches you but me. There were blokes staring at you too and I didn't like it at all."

"So maybe nightclubbing wasn't for us," Fred said.

"Everyone in there was just looking to hook up but the only person in there I wanted to hook up with was you," Regulus said. "I did like dancing with you though," he said putting his arms around Fred's neck swaying slightly.

Fred put his arms around Regulus' waist. "Yeah that part was nice." He kissed Regulus, felt Regulus hard and pressing against him. "Maybe I should just take you home?"

"Maybe you should," Regulus murmured his lips on Fred's earlobe. "Maybe now would be good."

Fred apparated them to their hotel room at the St James still kissing Regulus.

"Too many clothes," Regulus said ripping open Fred's shirt.

"Not so fast..." Fred murmured his lips on Regulus' neck. "...tonight I thought I might...." He pushed Regulus down on the bed and then joined him slowly unbuttoning Regulus' shirt. He kissed skin as he bared it. "...do this slowly..." He bared Regulus' stomach and kissed down, unbuttoning his trousers, kissing pelvic bone, feeling Regulus squirm with desire. "...really slowly...." He pulled down trousers and pants, kissing bare skin of thighs, felt Regulus arching toward his mouth, desperate to be touched.

"Please...." Regulus moaned.

"Someone really needs to learn some patience," Fred whispered his breath but not his mouth on Regulus' cock.

"No...please...I need...." Regulus moaned.

Fred continued kissing, licking, biting thighs, stomach, making Regulus beg before he finally took him in his mouth. He put his finger inside Regulus and heard him gasp in pleasure. Lips, tongue, teeth, fingers until Regulus could take no more and came inside his mouth. Fred swallowed and then crawled back up Regulus' motionless body. "Everything okay up here?" He asked kissing him. Regulus' eyelids fluttered slightly. "So still breathing then?"

Regulus opened his eyes and stared at Fred clearly trying and failing to form words. Fred smiled. "So you liked that?" Regulus tried to nod. "I'm glad," Fred smiled. "I quite enjoyed making you beg...and scream...but I'm not done with you yet." He took his own clothes off using magic and then pushed Regulus against the headboard kneeling behind him, his hand on Regulus chest, his stomach, his lips on his neck, his back. He felt Regulus pushing back against him, wanting him. He entered him plunging hard and deep.

"Oh Fred... Yes...." Regulus moaned.

"Not so fast," Fred murmured in Regulus' ear.

"Please...." Regulus begged and then reached for himself surprised that he was getting hard again.

Fred grabbed Regulus' hands. "Patience." He kept thrusting but slower, moving around a bit.

Regulus moaned.

"You like that?" Fred asked doing it again.

"Yes...."

"What about this?" Fred moved inside him slowly, deliberately.

Regulus groaned pushing back against Fred. "Yes... Oh god yes..."

Fred kept moving inside Regulus, exploring, making him moan in pleasure until Fred couldn't take it any more. He stroked Regulus' cock with the same deliberate movement, feeling Regulus shudder and come in his hand. Fred felt his own orgasm and then they were collapsed on top of each other breathless and shaking.

"What were you..what did you..." Regulus sputtered having lost his grasp on the English language.

"You liked that, did you?" Fred whispered in Regulus' ear.

"Very much." Regulus turned his head and kissed Fred. "It was great before but that...."

Fred smiled. "I should have started with that but you sort of annihilate any self control I might possess."

"Does it feel good to you too?"

"Being inside you is always the best thing ever," Fred assured him. "What I do once I'm there...it's all amazing."

"Can we do it again?" Regulus asked.

"Of course. Oh! You mean right now." Fred considered. He could probably do it again but he wasn't the one being contorted into odd positions. "Are you sure?"

Regulus suddenly wasn't sure. "Not if you don't want to. I just...I'm not normally this..."

"Insatiable?" Fred asked. "And I DO want to. I would happily spend all day, every day shagging your brains out."

"So it's not weird that I want to again? I just ...well...once was generally enough with a girl but you...."

"Really no inkling at all that you were gay before I kissed you?" Fred asked. "Not even a little hint?" His voice was teasing. "It makes me hard just thinking about you being insatiable, by the way," he whispered in Regulus' ear letting his breath stimulate Regulus' ear lobe. "As long as I'm the one making you insatiable." He got off Regulus long enough to roll him over so that they were face to face. He kissed him, rubbing against him, felt him hard against him, felt his hands guiding him where Regulus desperately wanted him to be. "Mm," Fred groaned as he entered Regulus. He kissed him thrusting against the spot that he knew would make Regulus moan his name.

"Fred...mm...yes...there...." Regulus moaned his hands on Fred's ass pushing him in deeper. "Yes...."

"Look at me," Fred said breathlessly. "I want to see you when you come."

Regulus stared up at him, moaning then crying out as the waves hit him.

"You're so beautiful." Fred kissed Regulus deeply and then let his own orgasm take over.

They lay on top of each other kissing.

Regulus wrapped his arms and legs around Fred like a cocoon wanting to keep him close. The sex was extraordinary but this part...the after...just being here with Fred like they were one person. "I love you."

"I love you too," Fred said tenderly kissing Regulus. He buried his face in Regulus' hair thinking he never wanted to leave. Never wanted to even move again. Why would he when everything he needed was wrapped around him?

*******************************************************************************

Fred and Regulus stood outside the restaurant of the St. James Hotel. "Remember when you asked me if I was nervous and I said no?" Regulus asked. "I'd like to change my answer."

"We don't have to tell anyone if you're not ready," Fred said.

"Can I be ready and terrified at the same time?" Regulus asked with a nervous smile.

"I would say that's a really accurate description of the situation," Fred agreed. Something in the back of his head wondered if Sirius didn't take this well would Fred be blamed? He did sort of seduce the man's brother. Though in Fred's defense, Regulus was pretty easy to seduce and it wasn't like it was a fling. He loved Regulus. REALLY loved him. 'Was willing to remain a secret if it made life easier for him' loved him. "So yes or no?"

"Yes," Regulus said. The two of them walked to the table where everyone was sitting and sat down across from Sirius. "I need to tell you something," Regulus blurted to Sirius.

Remus and Dora exchanged a knowing look.

Fred could see Regulus' hands shaking under the table and tried to discreetly capture one.

"What's up?" Sirius asked trying to appear nonchalant. "Did you two have fun last night?"

"Uh...yeah though.... " Regulus looked even paler than usual. He'd suddenly forgotten all the ways he'd rehearsed this going. Just spit it out. Rip the bandage off. "So...um...Fred kissed me."

Fred looked nervously at Sirius. He didn't recall this version being in any of the rehearsals.

Sirius looked nonplussed. He'd also rehearsed how this would go and had been advised to shut up and let Regulus talk.

Remus looked from Fred to Regulus and smiled encouragingly.

"And I liked it," Regulus continued.

"And..." Sirius encouraged.

"I really liked it, Sirius," Regulus said pointedly. "So much so that I had to take a few days away to consider what that meant."

Sirius' eyes narrowed at Fred putting some pieces together that he hadn't considered before.

"So after some soul searching, I realized that..." Bandage off. "I'm gay."

"We're so happy for you. For both of you," Aurora said.

"It's wonderful news," Lily said.

"Wonderful," Dora agreed.

Remus gave them an encouraging smile.

"Really happy for you both," James said.

"How long have you known?" Sirius asked.

"Maybe a month," Regulus said quietly.

"Maybe a month. You bloody idiot."

"Sirius!" Remus started. This was not what they had discussed!

"He didn't mean that..." James jumped in glaring at Sirius.

"You couldn't wait to tell me the moment 'death eater' popped into your bloody head even though you knew I would hate it and then spend the rest of our lives worried about you but this...you fall in love with a bloke who I happen to really like, who clearly makes you happy and you wait a month to tell me about it? Your priorities are really fucked up, Reg."

Regulus looked at Sirius in confusion trying to decipher the last reaction he'd prepared for.

"And you..." Sirius turned to Fred. "You let me think something horrible had happened to him for SIX DAYS! I thought he was being held prisoner by Voldemort! Why didn't you just tell me?"

"I...uh....well..." Fred stuttered.

"Bloody idiots, the both of you," Sirius said. He saw pain on Regulus' face, softened a bit and reached across the table for Regulus' hand. "I am really happy for you, Reg. That you found someone to love, someone who loves you. It makes all the difference." He let go of Regulus hand and turned back to Fred. "You though, you and I are going to have a chat about what happens to your bollocks if you ever do anything to hurt my brother."

"Sirius! I can take care of myself," Regulus looked a little mortified but also sort of pleased that Sirius would care.

"I promise, you've nothing to worry about on that front," Fred tried to assure Sirius.

"I better not," Sirius growled sinisterly in his best Black voice.

Fred gulped and felt his skin crawl just a bit.

Remus laughed. "Okay Padfoot, you've had your fun."

"Unsanctioned fun, at that," James pointed out.

Regulus looked over at Fred, smiled, and then raised their clasped hands to sit on the table and reached for a croissant with his free hand. His relieved brain replayed James' words. "What do you mean 'unsanctioned fun'?" he asked James suspiciously.

"Nothing. Don't know what I was talking about," James said color rising in his cheeks.

"It was the marks on my chest, wasn't it?" Fred asked James.

"Um. Uh...and when I went to find Reg the night before, he was a bit disheveled, his clothes were sort of on wrong and his hair was a mess and then he gave some really dumb excuse about reading a book."

"Reading a book? Really?" Fred asked Regulus.

"I shouldn't be left in charge of the lying," Regulus explained.

"How did you ever get sorted into Slytherin? Really, Reg," Sirius shook his head. "You're gay, you betrayed Voldemort, you're in love with a blood traitor but I really think this absolute lack of skill in the very Black art of deceit beats all of that...if Mother knew, your name would be getting blown off the family tree as we speak. Reading a book? Why didn't you just say you were sleeping and got dressed in the dark?"

"That...would have been better," Regulus admitted sheepishly.

"I happen to find your inability to lie absolutely adorable," Fred smiled at Regulus.

"So you told Sirius," Regulus asked James. Of course, he told Sirius.

"I didn't," James said. "I swear I didn't, Claws."

"He didn't. I already suspected and simply asked him to confirm," Sirius said. "He tried really hard not to tell me. It's the longest I've ever seen him hold out on me."

"And you suspected because?" Fred asked.

"I told him I quite liked you and then realized what that sounded like and added 'as a friend' which sounded even more incriminating," Regulus explained.

Sirius nodded. "I probably wouldn't have guessed otherwise."

"So you all knew and just didn't say anything?" Regulus asked.

"It seemed like you should tell us," Sirius said. "Though, for the record, we're all really happy for you both and you could have told us a month ago and gotten the same reaction."

"I've been stressing out over telling you for weeks!" Regulus said.

"So what finally convinced you to tell?" Dora asked. "Was it my brilliant plan to organize a date night?"

"I thought that seemed too convenient," Fred said. "All of you suddenly being lame though it was a brilliant plan, Dora. Thank you. We had quite a lovely time."

Dora smiled.

"So what did convince you?" Aurora asked.

"When it was just sex, hiding wasn't such a big deal but I just couldn't hide being in love with him anymore," Regulus explained.

Fred wanted to kiss Regulus and then realized that he probably could. He leaned over and kissed Regulus fairly chastely which didn't seem to upset anyone. He could get used to this.

"I do want to point two things out," Sirius said with a mischievous smirk.

Remus looked nervous.

"And they are?" Regulus asked warily.

"First, you're dating your cousin."

"What? I am not...am I?" Regulus scanned the family tree.

"His grandmother is our great aunt. Disowned of course. I think for marrying a Weasley which brings me to point 2. This would kill Walburga," Sirius said with a wistful smile. "If only she were here. Of course, she's rightly been banished to hell. I wonder if I could send an owl there?"

"Because he's gay or becauseFred's a blood traitor?" James asked curiously.

"Both. This may make me the favorite son again," Sirius smirked. "And we can't have that so I guess I'll have to forgo the joy of telling her that her perfect son betrayed Voldemort and is now in love with a male blood traitor."

"YOU were the perfect son. I'm sure she'll get over my myriad of betrayals. She'd have to care first," Regulus said.

Fred heard the tone in Regulus' voice and put his arm around him. "So now that we've made this kind of anti-climatic announcement, what's on the agenda for today?"

"Lily and I would like to go to Italy," Aurora said.

"Me too," Fred said enthusiastically.

"Vuoi che me a parlare italiano a letto?" Regulus whispered to Fred.

"Yes to whatever you just said," Fred said.

"Just a friendly reminder that I speak the same languages you speak, Reg," Sirius said.

"We only speak the curse words," James volunteered helpfully.

"Good to know," Regulus laughed. "I'll try to keep it above Sirius' normal level of discourse then," he smirked at Sirius.

"Baciami il culo!" Sirius said to Regulus.

"Totally understood that," Remus confirmed.

"We can curse in 15 different languages," James said proudly.

"Be still my heart," Lily said rolling her eyes.

"You speak 15 different languages?" Fred asked Regulus.

"Father considered languages a sort of secret code," Regulus explained.

"Makes it easier to defeat your enemies. It turns their strength into a weakness," Sirius added. "We were 7."

"We turned Ron's hair into snakes when we were 7," Fred said. "Mum took away our toy brooms."

"Shall we go before Fred realizes that we were raised by sociopaths and changes his mind?" Regulus suggested.

"Pretty sure he already knows, Reg," Sirius said. "On the bright side, he's still here."


	38. Roma

Regulus sat alone on the balcony of the villa they were staying at overlooking the Piazza di Spagna in Rome. The house, like every building around it, was ancient. The equally ancient streets were flooded with people enjoying the perfect day. He was wondering where Fred had gone when Sirius joined him. 

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Sirius asked by way of small talk. He'd come out for a reason but now wasn't sure how to start the conversation. 

"Breathtaking," Regulus agreed doubting that his brother had come out for the view. They hadn't really talked privately since Regulus told him about Fred. 

"So...Fred...." Sirius began. "It's a bit of a surprise, yeah? I mean, weren't you dating Antonin Dolohov's sister for awhile?"

"Dating is probably a bit strong," Regulus said.

"Well, fucking seemed crass," Sirius replied.

"That's probably a bit strong too," Regulus said staring at the square below. "We did have sex. Twice in fact. Sort of."

"How do you sort of have sex?"

"Well...I... we... there was...you know... but then it...and I couldn't... it wouldn't... you know... stay...." Regulus stuttered eyes downcast. "I thought it was broken. That I was defective."

Sirius finally pieced together what Regulus was saying. "Not an issue with Fred."

Regulus shook his head not looking at Sirius.

"So you knew that you were gay?"

"No. Should have known but no. I just thought...well, there was a war on. More important things to do than shagging every girl in school, right?"

Sirius considered this. "The war seemed like a really good reason to shag every girl in school actually."

"Yeah, I thought you would say that," Regulus said. "Therein lies the problem."

"I don't want you to think I don't approve," Sirius said. "I just want you to be happy."

"I am," Regulus looked at Sirius finally. "I really am. I love him and while I was freaked out at first, I'm good with this now. It's who I am. In fact, it's a relief." He looked back at the busy square. "So you're really not put off by it?"

"Of course not. I really like Fred and if you're happy then that's all that matters. Glad I didn't punch him that night Arthur ended up in St. Mungo's though. That could have been awkward."

"Dare I ask?"

"Let's just say he's the mouthier twin and I was having a shitty...well...decade...and I was drunk but I took a breath, realized he was upset, and didn't punch him. You're welcome."

Regulus laughed. 

Fred joined them on the balcony. "There you are," he said looking at Regulus. "Am I interrupting?"

"Not at all," Sirius said.

"We were just talking about you," Regulus said.

Fred looked a bit alarmed as he sat down beside Regulus. 

Regulus leaned back against Fred and wrapped Fred's arms around himself. Really enjoying this not being a secret thing, he thought. "Sirius says you're mouthier than George."

"Oh yeah. That's true," Fred confirmed. "I'm trying to remember which specific time I was an arsehole...."

"The night your dad was attacked and you were pissed because I wouldn't let you go tearing off to St. Mungo's in the middle of the night," Sirius supplied helpfully.

"Oh yeah. I was a pretty big arsehole. Said some stuff I shouldn't have said. Stuff I didn't mean. Sorry about that. I'm surprised you didn't punch me."

"Me too," Sirius laughed. "And Remus not even around to witness my restraint!"

"What restraint of yours did I miss?" Remus asked as he joined them. "I try to keep a record of such miraculous happenings. It's a short list, of course. Pretty much no entries at all from aged 11-16 and then only a handful after that."

"I'm showing restraint right now, Moony. Put that on your bloody list," Sirius snarled.

Remus laughed. 

"So I've been in Rome for 20 minutes and haven't been to Giolittis yet," Regulus said to Sirius.

"I understand the severity of the situation. I'll gather people up. Will we need to apparate directly there or do you think you can walk?" Sirius asked.

"I'll try to walk but it's urgent," Regulus said. 

"Understood. No one wants to see a repeat of the summer of 1969," Sirius got up and quickly went back in the villa. 

"Giolittis?" Fred asked.

"Only the best ice cream on the planet," Regulus said. 

James walked out onto the balcony. "Sirius says that there's an ice cream emergency. Should I bring a weapon or do you think we can manage this without terrorizing the wizarding world?"

"They were out of line," Regulus said. "I'm not apologizing for that."

"Wouldn't give you as many sprinkles as you wanted?" Remus asked.

"Wouldn't stop calling my brother a murderer actually," Regulus said. "I seem to have misplaced my go to scare tactic though..." He held out his left arm to James. "...so should be a peaceful trip."

"Dumbledore got him acquitted though," Remus said. "Fudge had to admit he was wrong."

"Took him long enough," Fred said darkly.

"Well word hasn't spread here," James said. "Well maybe NOW it has after Regulus threatened to feed the gossiping little bitches to the dark lord with his afternoon tea."

"I'm sorry I missed it," Fred said.

"Just so we're clear, I don't normally go around threatening random wizards in ice cream shops but they were saying really horrible, really stupid things about my brother and it pissed me off," Regulus told Fred.

Fred smiled. "You don't need to defend yourself to me. You do what you have to do to defend family."

"Yes," Remus said.

"Agreed," James said. "And really other than needing a change of pants, they weren't harmed."

Regulus laughed. 

"I was considering just walking over and punching them so your way was the better long term solution," James said. 

"What did you say to them?" Fred asked.

"I told them if I ever heard that rubbish coming out of anyone's mouth ever again, I would hold them personally responsible," Regulus said getting angry about it again. "It's just so ridiculous. Sirius is the one person that Voldemort didn't think he could turn but because his last name is Black everyone just believes it? There's not even a trial? Un-bloody-believable." 

"I couldn't agree more," James said not quite able to look at Remus. 

"For the record, you believed I was the traitor. You cut me out, James," Remus said quietly. 

"Do you understand why?" Regulus asked Remus. "Why you were a target for the Death Eaters? Why you were a weak link?"

"Werewolves are not naturally evil," Remus said coldly.

"I know that but they are naturally pack animals and Voldemort controlled the alpha. You would have told. In the end," Regulus said gently.

Remus shook his head knowing that Regulus may well be right. Not in his right mind but he wasn't always in his right mind and in that mind, anything was possible. 

"Did you know that they'd turned Peter?" James asked.

"No," Regulus answered. "I'm not surprised though. My guess is that he volunteered. Traded you and Sirius in for a more powerful model."

"How did he end up in Gryffindor?" Fred wondered.

"I've wondered that myself. Seems like he's either a coward or would do anything for power, neither of which seems like a Gryffindor trait," Regulus said.

"The hat was on his head for a long time," Remus said. "Not long enough to be a hat stall but a long time."

"I guess we know why," James said.

"How long was the hat on my brother's head?" Regulus asked. 

"Maybe 20 seconds. Not long," James said and smiled at the memory. "It was a happy moment for me. Being best mates with a Slytherin was going to be dodgy." 

Fred had a sudden moment of realization that if he and Regulus had been at Hogwarts at the same time, they wouldn't have been friends. Would possibly have been enemies just by the direction of a bloody hat. He hugged Regulus tighter unable and unwilling to imagine his life without him.

Regulus pulled Fred's head down and kissed him seeming to read his mind. "I vote we go for ice cream. Sirius knows where it is."

Dora and Lily came out.

"There is no point to waiting on them," Lily said. "They are doing what they do pretty much anytime we're trying to go somewhere. Remember California?"

"I told you not to give him a time limit," James said. "That one was on you."

"Really, Lily, how many times have I told you not to give him rules to rebel against?" Remus chided. "He's bad enough without rules."

"You're animals. All of you," Lily said. "Where's the ice cream?"

Regulus led them out onto the piazza and down the Spanish Steps to the Via Borgonona.

"How do you even know where you're going?" James asked. "This place has no street signs."

"Can you smell the ice cream with your lion sense?" Fred asked. "Because James is right. No street signs."

Regulus pointed to a sign about two feet off the ground that looked as if the ancient Romans had put it up. "Street signs."

"Were the ancient Romans house elves?" Fred asked incredulously squatting down to take a look. 

They continued wandering down roads that looked barely big enough to allow two chariots to pass each other until they came to Giolittis. 

"It's like the Honeydukes of ice cream," Fred exclaimed examining the many extraordinary things that had been done with ice cream. "Teach me how to order in Italian," he begged Regulus.

"Posso avere tre palline di gelato per favore," Regulus told Fred.

Fred walked up to the ice cream scooper and said what he thought was "Posso avere tre palline di gelato per favore."

"Please, you speak English, sir," begged the Italian woman behind the counter. "We understand."

Regulus laughed. "I think you've offended them," he told Fred kissing his wounded pucker before ordering basically one of everything in flawless Italian. 

"I'm beginning to doubt the quality of my pre-Hogwarts education," Fred moaned. 

"No," Regulus said kissing Fred again. "You're seeing like the only time my pre-Hogwarts education is useful. Ti amo," he said kissing him again. "The only Italian that matters. I love you."

"Ti amo," Fred told Regulus. "Ti amo so much."


End file.
